Isabella Cruise’s testimony sent in bizarre internal Scientology email

Tony Ortega is a journalist who has dedicated his career to uncovering the abuses of Scientology. He recently published an internal Scientology email featuring an alleged rambling testimony from Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman’s daughter, Isabella, 26. Bella, who has been living in London, married a lapsed Scientologist in late 2015 and the public hasn’t heard much from her since. It was thought that she might have defected like so many other Scientologists, some of whom have avoided openly criticizing the cult for obvious reasons (Jason Lee, Lisa Marie Presley). The testimony sent out from Bella sort-of disproves this. She’s very much still involved, or at least the cult wants us to think that she is. I’m only excerpting part of it as it’s just as hard to read as Lena Dunham’s sex essay. It’s about Bella training to be an auditor or something, which is the Scientology confession ritual where people hold tin cans and tell their secrets.

I’ve written this success many, many times over in my head. I want to get it just right. But now that it’s time and I’ve forgotten many of my mentally penned notes, here comes the real one.

This journey started with my training, and even that was a bullbait. I knew I needed it but every fibre of my being fought me on it. Said I was the PC, that if I did it I’d get nothing from it and many more delightful little criticisms. I was overwhelmed before I started.

It turned out it was exactly what I needed. I dragged out the testing and correction, just made it through the drilling and then finally began my auditing adventure, and wow, I wasn’t prepared. This IS what I had been searching for. The missing piece. Suddenly everything began to make sense. My metering… Wow. It became clear I actually knew my metering. Even to the point of having any slight doubt on a read. I know it wasn’t a read. Beautiful thing about drilling, of course. The tech that I felt was wavering and on the verge of disappearing from my mind became part of me. I know it. Like really know it to the point that it’s just there man. I never thought I could know something like that.

The internship, for me, is what made me a Scientologist. I don’t just believe the tech works now. I know without any doubt that it does.

Thank you to my Dad for everything. To Cass. To Tash. I would have drowned in my own problems if you hadn’t been there to sup me or get me through the preliminaries.


Like really know it to the point that it’s just there man.” This must only make sense to Scientologists because I didn’t understand most of it. It’s full of cult-speak about their expensive auditing and levels, and Ortega has more insider details if you’re interested. Apart from the photo of Bella accompanying this email, there’s no proof that she actually wrote it. It’s likely that someone else wrote it for her. Americans don’t spell fiber like that and Bella was raised in America.

Ortega has more on the woman who sent out the email, a staff member who is married to another Scientologist, and notes that “We’ve never seen Isabella or her brother Connor used in any official Scientology promo or publication of any kind.” He adds that Bella lives in England, has “pursued a career in fashion,” and put out a fashion line last year.

I have some weak evidence that the photo the Scientology email used of Bella is old. On the website for her clothing line, which seems to consist of very expensive t-shirts with doodles on them, she has shorter hair and looks thinner. (She is on Instagram but her account is private.) Plus she has a nose ring in that website photo and in event photos of her here from 2016, but she doesn’t have a nose ring in the Scientology photo. So Scientologists used an old photo of her and may have had someone else write that for her. Whatever the case I bet her dad approved it. We’ve heard that Cruise is number two in Scientology after leader David Miscavige. There’s no way a Scientologist would put out an email from Bella without asking Cruise first.

I hope Bella is still in touch with her mom. We’ve heard for years how Bella and her brother, Connor, were told from an early age that their mother was a suppressive person and was to be avoided. Nicole did go to Bella’s 2015 wedding while Tom wasn’t there. Last year, Nicole said of Bella and Connor that “They have made choices to be Scientologists and as a mother, it’s my job to love them.”

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2010, before Tom and Katie Holmes split. Tom hasn’t seen his daughter Suri, 12, in years.
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photos credit: WENN and Getty

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36 Responses to “Isabella Cruise’s testimony sent in bizarre internal Scientology email”

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  1. Seraphina says:

    Nicole gave a very diplomatic answer. And of course what else could she say??? I hope they have reached out to Nicole since she seems why to us is normal, but cults have a different grasp on people that most of us will never understand. Just like an abused person who stays in a relationship. Various degrees of abuse and control but the fear of escape and the notion that it is normal is still there for both. Hope the kids get out if they haven’t already. And it’s not like Tom is father of the year award material. He clearly cares about himself.

  2. Steff says:

    Drilling? Metering? Oh my!
    Were these Scientology terms discussed in ‘Going Clear’?

    • delphi says:

      Yep. The documentary was fantastic, but the book is infinitely better. Larry Wright is a hero.

      Also, Tony Ortega is my web crush. That man is fighting the good fight, and has been since before it became so open to critique $cientology. I just adore him. The Underground Bunker is one of the most informative (if saddening) websites out there. If you have any questions or need translations of $cientology$peak, that’s the best place to go. Just brace yourself when you read the accounts at the bottom of each page that detail how long it’s been since ex-members or non-member families have seen their loved ones in that cult. It’s a gut-punch.

      • Cay says:

        Me too. I’m on his site at least once a day, and now he’s added articles on JW and Nxivm.

    • SM says:

      Drilling, metering, testing – is thus supposed to be about faith or an oil plant?

  3. Jen says:

    I’m glad she got rid of the blond hair. She looks much better with dark hair that’s a bit longer. $85 for t-shirts??? Oookay.

  4. velourazure says:

    Tax all religions now.

    • Marianne says:

      Tax all businesses now. Leave religion alone.

      • Erinn says:

        Nah. Tax the mega churches. If you can’t prove that you’re doing a certain amount of community service hours and actually giving back then there should be no tax exempt status.

      • Valiantly Varnished says:

        Nope. Tax businesses AND churches. I am a religious person. And I believe ALL religious institutions should pay taxes. It is the civic responsibility of everyone that lives within a community to do so. Taxes pay for firefighters, public schools, police officers, snow removal, etc. and all should contribute to the services if they use them.

      • jan90067 says:

        These mega-churches especially! OMG I was reading accounts of families after the massive floods here… one woman, who was going to that Joel Osteen’s church, had her home wiped out. She went to the church for help (with a place to stay, clothing, food). She said they turned her away because “she didn’t tithe enough”. Another couple said they were turn away, because while Christian, “they didn’t belong”. What religious house turns away people in need? Those bogus “Christians” who are doing it solely for what they can rob from their blind worshipers.

        Maybe it’s just me… But I don’t think ANY religious leader, in ANY religion needs to be living in a mega-mansion or driving a Bentley/Rolls, EVER. There are ALWAYS people in need in their parishes. And before you come at me, no, I don’t believe they should take a vow of poverty, but there is one hell of a difference btwn. “poverty” and a “mega-mansion/Bentley” lifestyle.

      • Kebbie says:

        @Jan Snopes debunked that story. Joel Osteen is the worst, but that specific claim isn’t true.

        They couldn’t possibly track who tithes what anyways because people put cash in their collection baskets. No one would know if a person put $100 in a collection basket each week or nothing.

      • Cher says:

        Kebbie, churches actually do keep track of how much you’re tithing—especially big ones like Osteen’s. While you *can* give a little extra by putting money in a collection plate, my mom’s small church would also provide a year’s worth of envelopes annually, and you’d be expected to bring in checks in those envelopes. That was years ago. Many churches, Osteen’s included, would have an automatic debit system set up to take a certain percentage of your wages. This is highly organized for them—a business. I’m sure they have a large accounts payable department.

      • velourazure says:

        All the more reason for them to be taxed.

  5. Goldie says:

    If I recall correctly, neither Tom nor Nicole attended Bella’s wedding.

  6. Lizzie says:

    i feel so bad for nicole kidman.

    • Lady2Lazy says:

      True. The hold and power that Crazy Cruise has on those around him have given him this undeserving manipulation power play. I don’t like Crazy Cruise as he likes to bully and control those around him. What judge allowed him to grant his wishes for Katie not to date for 5 years? That’s ridiculous! Katie was lucky she got out when she did. As for father material, he is just a POS. Which is probably true in regards to husband material as well. I am surprised that he can get through doors with that enormous ego head.

  7. Hmm says:

    Her mother is nuts too. Just gave up her kids because she fears whatever secrets Scientology has on her. Read once a long time ago that Scientology has some real scandalous shit about cruise and Kidman and that if it ever got out both would be ran out of hollyweird.

    • Millenial says:

      I think that’s a mischaracterization of what happened. I think Nicole probably didn’t realize what would happen in terms of being shut out, and by the time she did, her kids were too old to do much about it. From what I recall, Tom wasn’t that committed to Scientology when they were together, so she may have assumed the kids wouldn’t get brainwashed.

      There’s a reason Katie Holmes left before Suri got to the age of Nicole’s kids. I think she saw what happened with Bella and Connor and got out before she lost her daughter to the cult, too.

      • Cay says:

        According to Tony Ortega, that’s not exactly how it went down. He says that Tom Cruise was luke warm on Scientology because Nicole wasn’t into it. It was David Miscavige who pulled Tom back into Scientology and “forced” him to divorce Nicole. Nicole’s phones were tapped and private detectives were following her.

        Tom Cruise was just at the L. Ron Hubbard birthday celebration in Clearwater, Florida, last week. Tom isn’t normally seen at these public events, so the theory is that David Miscavige is pulling rank again on some of the big celebrities in order to make it seem like Scientology is still viable. It’s probably not a coincidence that Tom was seen at an event last week, Bella was featured in a magazine, and Connor is getting married. All of this is to remind us that the Cruise family are dedicated Scientologists. (And that’s the reason Tom doesn’t see Suri.)

        (Again, all info allegedly and thanks to Tony Ortega’s site.)

      • Harryg says:

        David Miscavige is an evil creep.

      • Svea says:

        She initially took the kids with her and they were living with her in New York. Teens, the kids insisted on going back to their father, the cash and prizes and the church.

    • Erinn says:

      Pretty hard to force brainwashed teenages to spend time with you.

    • Lizzie says:

      David Miscavige made his wife disappear. If you think Nicole Kidman wasn’t credibly threatened with more than “secrets” but rather, having herself or her children physically harmed unless she let them go quietly – i have a bridge to sell you.

    • Kebbie says:

      Are you just not aware of what Scientology is capable of? These people are dangerous and crazy. People have died and disappeared when they crossed the powers that be in Scientology. God only knows how they threatened her, her kids, and her family. Everything we know about the “church” today was still a well kept secret back then.

      Katie is lucky she knew what was coming and she was able to plan ahead. Even then she was using burner phones and had to basically escape, no doubt making threats of her own against them if they challenged her for custody. Then she tipped off the paparazzi every time she went out as added protection for her and her daughter. The paparazzi actually photographed some Scientology goons that were stalking Katie and Suri. Those people are beyond dangerous. Nicole did what she thought was best, and I don’t judge her for it at all. They’re all still okay and now she has a relationship with them.

    • efffefff says:

      Yeah, it’s pretty widely acknowledged that Nicole was out-resourced by the Church of Scientology as a whole that fought behind Tom Cruise to keep custody of these children. And that she lost her chance at a close healthy relationship as a mother because of it. It’s wild seeing someone on here trying to blame her for it.

  8. Cay says:

    Tony Ortega also had an article yesterday saying Connor Cruise is marrying an Italian Scientologist. One of the things Sci does is bring “religious workers” over from other countries to the United States on a religious worker visa (R-1). This person works at the Scientology “mission” in Belleair, Florida. According to posters at Underground Bunker, this “mission” is notorious for having foreign workers. (I believe a “mission” is kind of like a franchise site. It’s “owned” by individual Scientologists rather than an “org” or “ideal org” owned and operated by Scientology.) Because Scientology is losing members in the United States, they now recruit people from other countries to come to the United States to staff their facilities. According to posters and ex-Sci’s, Scientology takes their passports when they are working (allegedly) so they cannot leave the country. They are basically captives to the religion.

    Anyway, I could go on, but just spend time at Tony Ortega’s blog or Mike Rinder’s blog. They are both eye-opening about what is happening in Scientology.

    (Please feel free to correct me if I’m wrong about any of the details in this post about Scientology.)

  9. Spike says:

    It’s fascinating that her clothing line is BKC. She uses the name Bella KIDMAN Cruise. It appears that a sea change is occurring. Nicole must be thrilled.

    It’s telling as she has never used Kidman as part of her surname. It’s a good sign.

    • Redgrl says:

      Or, cynically, the cult has told her to do that, figuring that’s the only way she can market her doodles to non-members…

  10. Caitlin Bruce says:

    Nicole did not go to her wedding. Neither did Tom. He paid for it though.

  11. Spike says:

    I apologize if I’m double posting in error.

    It’s fascinating that her clothing line is BKC. She uses the name Bella KIDMAN Cruise. It appears that a sea change is occurring. Nicole must be thrilled.

    It’s telling as she has never used Kidman as part of her surname. It seems to be a good sign.

    • Kebbie says:

      My guess is that as she’s gotten older and more independent she’s realized that Nicole has done nothing to be deemed a “suppressive person.” If Nicole started trying to get her out of Scientology, I’m sure the brainwashing would kick in, and Nicole would be cut out again. But as long as Nicole stays neutral, she can have a relationship with her kids.

      Plus, in the “Church’s” eyes Nicole is now probably a saint compared to Katie Holmes.

  12. tuille says:

    Re: “Tom hasn’t seen his daughter in 12 years.” Incorrect. Suri is 12 now & will be 13 on April 18. She’s clearly 3 or 4 in that pic walking next to Tom. He did see her at least a couple of times after Katie left.