I want to thank all of you for your words of encouragement yesterday… I knew I made the right decision to simply block out the horrible premiere of Liz & Dick. It probably would have given me a rage-stroke. I probably would have become a crackhead just from watching it, like the crackiness was airborne or something. Anyway, Lindsay’s turn as a bloated, crack-faced Elizabeth Taylor was universally panned. And I do mean UNIVERSALLY. Everyone thought she was awful. Except for Michael Lohan, but he doesn’t count. Vagina-kickers NEVER count. But surely we’re forgetting one other person too, right? Yes, Lindsay thought her performance as Elizabeth Taylor was nothing short of brilliant and epic and Oscar-worthy. She’ll probably try to parlay this Lifetime movie into an appearance at the Golden Globes. And Radar says she’s definitely trying to parlay this “success” into a TV show. I guess TLC is planning a Faces of Meth reality show…?
Even though critics raked Lindsay Lohan over the coals for her performance in the Lifetime television movie Liz & Dick, the former child actress is determined to star in her own television sitcom, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.
“Lindsay has asked her manager and agent to look into getting her her own television sitcom,” a source close to the situation tells RadarOnline.com exclusively. “Lindsay feels that the small screen would be a great way for her to revitalize her acting career and that a comedy would be the best bet. Lindsay feels most comfortable doing comedy and it was Charlie Sheen that told her she should do it. Charlie told Lindsay that it was an easy way to make very good money and help her to get her movie career back on track. Lindsay is loving the idea of having her own sitcom and would love to play someone in a story based on her crazy life.”
As previously reported, the critics may have roundly panned her performance as Elizabeth Taylor in Liz & Dick, but Lindsay is finding one diehard fan in her father Michael.
After the web exploded with viewers making snide comments about LiLo’s turn as the iconic actress and humanitarian, the patriarch of the Lohan family took to Twitter to claim that “all the critics should find new jobs!
“They know nothing about @lindsaylohan talent! She has more talent in her pinky then all of them together,” the proud dad tweeted. “You proved the critics wrong @LindsayLohan you are one of the best, so gifted, so amazing! Now apply it ALL! God bless you! And our family!”
Meanwhile, the comedy community got an early Christmas gift with the LiLo film, as many took to Twitter to contribute their snarky insights on her supposed comeback project.
Dane Cook: “I just realized Liz & Dick is on. No, I wasn’t watching it, but I can literally smell it.”
Morgan Murphy: “If you want to see something better than Liz & Dick, go to YouTube and search for ‘explosive diarrhea.’ … Liz & Dick has shown us all what it looks like when the girl who smokes in the parking lot gets cast as the lead in the high school play.”
However, “Lindsay isn’t fazed at all by the criticism. She thinks everyone is insanely jealous of her, and like it or not, she was trending on Twitter last night. Lindsay hopes that she could get her own television sitcom like Kirstie Alley did with Fat Actress. Lindsay admires what Kirstie did and wants to follow in her footsteps,” the insider says.
Believe it or not, I don’t think the biggest problem is that the Cracken wants her own TV show – I mean, she’s delusional and money-hungry, so of course she wants her own TV show. What bothers me is that she thinks her life has “sitcom” potential. Dear Crackie: Your life a crack drama, not a sitcom. Your life is like Breaking Bad without the award-worthy acting. Your life is like The Wire, only without the brilliant writing. But most of all, your life is like a really awful reality show that never ends and has no real plot. Maybe National Geographic will do a “Crackies in the Mist” special. “This is the crackie in her natural habitat, the Marmont. Let’s watch as the crackie flaunts her rotting plumage to attract a wealthy mate. The crackie ‘presents’ herself by throwing a drink at a younger, more fertile crack interloper, then shrieks her crack-siren call.”
Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.