Madonna joins Instagram, shows off her sweaty cleave: cool or desperate Madge?


Well, it’s been a long time coming, but Madonna is on Instagram now, which makes sense because (as I’ve learned from Rihanna), Instagram is a great place to let one’s inner narcissist fly, and Madge has already made her living in that regard over a period of decades. Basically, Madonna and all of her previous image incarnations have been waiting for social media this entire time, and she’s just now figuring out that all that hard work of re-invention could have been done so much easier through the internet. I mean, look at what Lady Gaga accomplished as far as publicity goes. She started merely walking around in weird outfits, and the photos would show up online, and voila! Instant pop star. In contrast, Madonna worked very hard to build her career starting in the early 1980s, and now she’s just now realizing that she can upload her own selfies to the internet, sit back, and wait for stuff to happen for her.

Of course, Madonna immediately posted her first selfie of an intimate moment with a cocktail and a caption that reads, “Cheers motherf***ers! I’m on instagram.” That’s not even the start of her online classiness. Next up? A photo of Madonna’s sweaty cleavage accompanied by “Addicted to sweat !!!!!” Right. As if that one wasn’t planned out well in advance, but she sure seems to have a problem with exclamation points.


Here’s another Madonna self-portrait that’s actually kind of funny. The caption reads, “Im thinking of shaving my moustache!!!!


So basically, Madonna has found a new way to drum up attention for herself, which I guess is better than srutting around in cheerleader outfits. This next one is kind of creepy, but it’s an older photo that was uploaded by a member of Madonna’s team last fall before Madge took over the account reins. The caption reads, “Accidental punch to Madonna during “Gang Bang.’” Now, I may have lost touch with Madge’s new music over the years, but that’s a terrible song title even by the tackiest of standards.


Photos courtesy of Madonna’s Instagram

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46 Responses to “Madonna joins Instagram, shows off her sweaty cleave: cool or desperate Madge?”

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  1. Eleonor says:

    Unless she publishes an RX of a part of her body, we’ve just seen everything, even before internet.

  2. daz says:

    My one wish is to be in the same room when Lourdes informs Madonna she’s about to become a Grandmother.

  3. SheilaK says:

    Overrated nasty old slag. Go away

  4. dorothy says:

    Madge has been desparate for years.

  5. Anna says:

    I sooo wished I didn’t see those pictures – eww eww. Why Madonna why? This really does prove people point that she a narcissistic old hag.

  6. Stoner says:

    If I were Lourdes, I’d put a pillow over her face while she slept. I can NOT even begin to imagine what it’s like to have a mother who feels the need to constantly compete with me.

  7. Nemesis says:

    That one pic looks like she got bukakai (or however you spell it)

  8. lucy2 says:

    It must be exhausting to be her. For everything she’s accomplished and all the success she’s had, it’s never enough, she always needs more attention.

  9. Layna says:

    I find these photos embarrassing

  10. dcypher1 says:

    she looks like shes pumped full of hgh. it makes her look buff and manly.

    • RosettaStoned says:

      Yeah I had gone from loving her growing up, to being tired of her, to starting to dislike her, and now seeing these pics makes me love her again because it looks like she’s having fun and doesn’t really give a shit if anyone else likes it. Beats the ‘eddie cibrian’ instagram for sure lol.

  11. mia girl says:

    Sweaty ol Madonna is something none of us ever needed to see.

  12. Muffy says:

    On Dlisted, described her as Mr. Burns in the first picture, gotta love Micheal!

  13. silken_floss says:

    Used to love ol Magde. Not so much now. She’s thirsty as hell!!

  14. tracking says:

    What’s she supposed to do, put on some granny clothes and retire? She’s MADONNA! More power to her.

  15. Jaded says:

    Cheap, disgusting old slapper. Her monumental greed and desparation for attention has sunk to a new low.

  16. Jade says:

    Aw come on we all have our periods of
    cam whoring, she just has a bigger audience. She’s probably trying to play catch up with instagram since she did not have this in her teens lol.

  17. Nan says:

    Oh god, Madonna, grow up. I don’t get how she can rationalize being the mother of a teen with perpetually trying to be the “bad influence” on everybody else’s teens just for money & career. Very selfish values. Not to mention, none of this looks good on her.

  18. Shannon says:

    Gross!!! Love you Madonna, but enough already. You’re a senior citizen now.

  19. suzanne says:

    I used to love her now she is a constant disappointment

  20. KellyinSeattle says:

    I used to love her , too, but now she just needs to retire and eat some figs.

  21. some bitch says:

    Soooo much ageism. Madonna is fabulous and she can still put on one hell of a show.

  22. B says:

    I agree with “some bitch”. The ageism is nauseating.

  23. skuddles says:

    Desperate. Very. And that sweaty pic is just gross!

  24. Kellie says:

    Se looks like Lisa Marie Presley in the pic with the guitar!!

  25. Cinderella says:

    Cher did it so much better.

  26. Christina says:

    Madonna does not give a shit what anyone thinks of her. The pictures are funny and quirky. No better or worse than anyone posts on Instagram. Regular non-famous people use Instagram to post pictures of their lunch and self taken kissy face collages, is that not also narcissism ? Social media is narcissistic in general, whether you are a famous person or not. Difference is, famous people are getting paid!! Us regular folks just anxiously await someone to “like” or “heart” our photo we too of ourselves right after our new haircut. Madonna does what Madonna wants to do. Madonna sweats, oh no!!! Madonna is getting older, go away??! That is bullshit! Without Madonna, all these younger things out there, Gaga, Ke$ha, etc etc would not exist, PERIOD. Madonna is badass and always will be.