Chrissy Teigen compares herself to Instagram models, cries & thinks she’s inadequate


Most of us here are rather meh on Chrissy Teigen. (With the exception of Corey! She usually covers Chrissy as she appreciates her a lot.) Although we like her politics and sometimes her candor in general, she goes too far and she’s often trying to drum up controversy on social media for headlines. That’s her bread and butter and so I get it somewhat, but she can be exhausting. I came away from these brief quotes she gave, at Beautycon in LA recently, with a better understanding of why she does that. My God is she insecure. I mean kudos to her for admitting it but this goes beyond what I would imagine. Chrissy admitted that, even though she knows Instagram photos are photoshopped and filtered, she still compares her body to the models there. She’s also said that she’s cried over it and that she finds herself “insanely inadequate.” Ok I do feel like I get her a little more now.

Chrissy admitted that even she gets jealous about other people’s bodies when she sees them on social media.

“I’m in a weird phase where I’m jealous of those bodies, but I also really want to be cool with my own body. I really want to be that person for you all, that says, “You don’t need that f—— s—,” Teigen said.

“My old ass will go on social media, and I will look at the Photoshopping, Facetuning, and the apps — and everything that goes into creating what is now a hit Instagram photo — and I feel insanely inadequate,” Chrissy said.

You know those times when you’re online and you say to yourself, “I wish I had her body,” or “If I just lost five pounds, I could look like that”? Chrissy has been there, saying, “There have been times I’ve cried to [husband] John [Legend], where I felt like I would just never have ‘that’ body. I’ve definitely been really upset with…you know, everyone has a butt now, everyone has curves, and a little waist, and that’s not me…

“I’ve been on shoots, I’ve been naked-to-naked with people, and I will say that everyone has a stretch mark. Every time I see that other stretch mark, I’m like, ‘Girl, yes!’ It makes me feel better, and if more of us did that kind of s—, how many people would feel better?”

We’re right there with you, girl!

But, of course, Chrissy lightened the mood a bit by sharing more wisdom. When she’s not on Instagram, Snapchat, or Twitter, she and John Legend take cooking classes together, she doesn’t take off her makeup at night (another GASP), and she loves doing facials on herself and her husband when they travel.

[From People]

I don’t do Instagram, but I will admit that I’ve unfriended that one acquaintance on Facebook who was always posting bikini selfies. I wasn’t comparing myself to her so much as getting annoyed, at least that’s what I told myself. (Who does she think she is, being proud of her body?) I’m finally mostly ok with my shape because I lost the weight I wanted to, so instead when I see photos of myself I nitpick my hands, my face and my neck. Oh and my butt needs more muscle. It’s always something. You might assume that a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model who constantly goes on vacation with her loving, multi-platinum, nearly EGOT-winning husband and their adorable daughter has a charmed life. She superficially looks happy about everything, including her body. Just look at her, she’s got those legs, those boobs, she’s lovely. Instead she cries over other women’s posed and perfectly lit photos, thinking she’s never going to look that good. She also got lipo on her armpits, which is not an area most people obsess over. I guess we never truly know what’s going on with someone, even the richest, most photographed and most vocal. Also I’m reminded that Chrissy suffered postpartum depression after Luna was born in April of last year. I wonder if she’s still recovering from that and if that’s what’s behind her response.

As for the fact that she doesn’t take off her makeup at night – I bet she does that to always be selfie-ready. I’m not even kidding, she needs the validation.

🐥

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Photos credit: Getty, Instagram/Chrissy Teigen and Backgrid

 

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111 Responses to “Chrissy Teigen compares herself to Instagram models, cries & thinks she’s inadequate”

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  1. JA says:

    She’s sounds incredibly sad. I envy the financial aspect of her life, the opportunity to take lavish vacays and raise your child without support as you dont work 40hr weeks. But I do not envy her life or the constant need to look like perfection. I like not giving a crap some days and living in my workout gear and knowing my husband loves me and the opinions of others won’t destroy me. Again she sounds very pathetic…we all have insecurities but she lives everyday by them!!

    • pinetree13 says:

      Yeah I don’t get this.
      I mean i’m trying to lose my belly fat right now, but to CRY over models?!?! That’s just so weird to me. I was actually shocked by this. Like here I thought I was vain, but I cannot even imagine scrolling through instagram and crying because I don’t look as perfect as a filtered photo. Geez girl get a hobby! We’re all going to look like crap eventually anyways (something i’m trying to come to terms with). I’ve never seen a sexy 90 year old and all those instagram models are going to age too sooooooo…I mean i can see being unhappy but to the point of crying?? Just seems nutty.

      Then again, on second thought, I guess if you live a charmed life with no relationship issues, no money issues, no co-workers/bosses you can’t stand and are forced to deal with…then I guess you’d search for things to be worried about.

      • vavavoom says:

        I hear what you’re saying, and believe me I’d trade my ‘problems’ for her so called problems … but I imagine that because her job is to be perfectly beautiful and she has now had a baby, is getting older, etc. She is feeling the pressure of the up and comers pushing her aside . Her livelihood is being perfect and beautiful and that’s impossible to achieve, yet it looks like others are.

      • Jillybean says:

        I get the feeling her hubby loves her regardless of all of her insecurities. He seems so genuinely into her

    • Mrs Odie says:

      I would never cry over other models, but that’s not my job. I’m not in an industry where I will be “old” before I’m 30. But when other people in my profession are killing it, I do feel inadequate. I’m a teacher, and when a young, new teacher comes in and becomes every student’s favorite, I feel sad and inadequate. Luckily, I’m in a profession where being older (to a point) actually makes your job easier and gets you more not less respect. In order to be in her job, she has to constantly be beautiful, thin, and young. And that sucks. But, as Han Solo once said, better her than me.

  2. Lucy says:

    Ugh. All I have to say is I feel you, girl. And I’m not a model by any means.

  3. minx says:

    She looks absolutely stunning in the black off-the-shoulder blouse and pants. The purse, earrings, lipstick, hair…everything is perfect. Wow!

  4. detritus says:

    Feel free to yell at me, but I have a really hard time with these insanely beautiful women talking about how hard it is for them to love their bodies.

    It’s hard for everyone, but for the average woman there is much more pressure to conform and os much more judgement. Chrissy is already there. She’s in the 1% of most beautiful people, and she’s anxious because she’s not what she sees as 0.1%. She still reaps all the benefits of being seen as beautiful, and therefore as a woman – worthwhile, regardless of how she sees herself.

    I dunno if I’m explaining it right, but its almost like when white women jump on WoC comments with – i’ve also been teased about my skin tone. Obviously not to the same level, i’m just struggling to describe this. Its akin to Ratajkowski’s don’t hate the sexy b*tch schtick.

    • QueenB says:

      I fully agree.

      The “Beauty comes from the inside” said by physically perfect people is pretty much the “I dont see color” said by white people.

    • Miss S says:

      What for me seems to be really different is that anonymous women don’t deal with the scrutiny someone famous does. On top of it, she uses social media a lot and is/was a model which will exacerbate her insecurities. In her context, she doesn’t seem to be good enough, pretty enough, skinny enough… In our contexts with “normal” women just looking like her and having the choices she as (makeup, clothing….) would put us “ahead” of others.

      This reminds of the concept of being rich. For someone to feel rich in New York is very different from being rich in small town. The perspective is totally different.

      • Maple Girl says:

        Even non famous women face scrutiny, without the praise these celebrities get.
        Try being a fat woman on a bus stop on a saturday night. It’s not scrutiny, it’s usually full on abuse.

      • QueenB says:

        But she also gets money from it. Because she is seen as “ahead” of other women.

        Chrissy doesnt face anything different, its just more voices. But that there is more focus on her also means she can make more money than most of us in our life time.

      • Leo says:

        Also, for every vile comment she gets online, there are literally hundreds and thousands a day calling her a godess. How many anonymous women get that level of validation?

      • Miss S says:

        You must be joking! You really believe that anyone not famous gets the same scrutiny about their looks?! Have you really stop to think about this? I’m really stunned by your reaction. We are all affected, but we are not exposed and the compliments she gets, if judging by how most people deal with insecurities, don’t really weight as much as the criticism (which we tend to obsess over, even if people we trust say we are fine).

      • Shirleygail says:

        The theory of relativity comes to mind. I wish she’d put her boobs away, though. I honestly believe the more left to theimagination, the more impactful the look. She is (relatively) modestly covered up in the off-the-shoulder top and looks freaking gorgeous. She looks stupid with her boobs hanging out in the dress….imo

    • LadyMTL says:

      @Detritus I get what you’re trying to say, but I don’t think that because she’s beautiful and rich that means she can’t still have insecurities. She might be seen as worthwhile because she is young and gorgeous and takes fab vacations and etc, but inside she doesn’t feel the way others see her. Of course we average women face pressure too, but it doesn’t make hers any less valid, at least not IMHO.

      I’ll use myself as an example: I’m on the taller side and thin-ish, and I’ve been lucky to not have any weight issues. My friends always say “oh, I hate you, you’re so lucky, you can eat anything you want and you never gain weight!” but they don’t see me at home getting upset over cellulite on my thighs or trying to deal with my borderline disordered eating habits. When you see what’s on the surface only, it’s easy to say that someone has it good.

      We all struggle with insecurities, is basically what I was taking forever to say, lol. :)

      • detritus says:

        I understand what you mean, and I have a friend who is very slender and has trouble gaining weight. She just has a different set of insecurities. My friend though, she doesn’t complain about how she’s not thin enough. Do you position yourself as being too heavy to your friends (who you admit are heavier than you?)

        I just think it’s in poor taste and reveals a bit more about her internal priorities than maybe she anticipated. I can’t help but feel that a woman who judges her own body so harshly, and this is crucial too – is actively comparing it to others, would most likely judge others bodies as also ‘not enough’ as well.

      • Miss S says:

        Totally agree with you. It’s easy to make a superficial assessment of how we think others live and feel, but that’s rarely accurate. And we usually also find it hard to be appreciative of our personal circumstances that are admired by others when we struggle with other variables of it, variable those same people don’t see or simply don’t value because they imagine how great they would feel if in our shoes.

      • magnoliarose says:

        I posted about this sort of the other day.
        I am like you. I am 5’10 and have never been over 130 lbs no matter what I do. But it doesn’t mean I don’t feel like I have flaws that I always accept. When you look at yourself naked it is just you and the mirror. I don’t think “well at least I am not this or that”. I don’t compare to anyone but myself. Having babies changes your body and it will never look like it did before, maybe other people don’t see it but I do. I just don’t whine about it because I know women deal with more than I do and have it harder. There is no other way for it to seem but obnoxious and humble bragging or mean. I can be supportive and encourage and help if I am asked. It also doesn’t mean I feel superior to other women, I don’t compete like that. It isn’t part of my feminism and it is a male driven behavior to keep women submissive.

        However, I don’t think it is fair to be dismissive to Chrissy. The modeling world is cruel and if a girl is not thick skinned and determined it breaks them. You are berated about weight, praised when you are underweight and ridiculed when you gain 5 pounds. They see it immediately and pinch at your body exclaiming in front of others You are fat. Look at that roll. Or You should be a plus model I don’t want a fat girl in my show. Agents hear about it and then berate and abuse. Every single flaw is criticized like you are the ugliest troll from under a bridge. That is where starving starts, coke, shooting thyroid hormones, bulimia, depression that is sometimes suicidal and addictions. It starts at 15 or 16 and even when you are successful there are still little nags. By the time the success happens it is in your psyche.
        Chrissy is a bottom rung model. She has never reached the levels of Gigi or Bella. She knows this and it makes it worse for her. If your job has always been about looks and you haven’t come to terms with aging and haven’t spent time developing your inner self and stayed grounded, then you end up like Chrissy.

        When I look at a model it is instant appraisal without even noticing it. It is ingrained but there is nothing emotional about it. It is like looking at a car or dress when you shop. There is a very different appraisal method. I know what she doesn’t like about herself and I see it every time I look at her. But as a model, not a woman.
        Without therapy, this won’t change for her. She is always aware of other women’s beauty and if she thinks someone looks better, it is crushing. Her kookiness and extra is common with models like her, but they are exhausting as friends.

    • Maple Girl says:

      Don’t yell at me, but I don’t believe her. Body positivity is the new it topic, and all these celebrities are jumping on board. Do I think she has insecurities? Yes, everyone does. Do I believethey are so huge she cries about them? No. But her whole persona is being down to earth and regular, and this is just another part of the PR.

      • KP says:

        I totally agree. A) I just don’t have sympathy if it is true. Get a damn grip. B) I think she’s saying it because it’s part of her brand. “I’m soooo likeable and real- I cry about my model body too.” Give me a break. Or get some therapy.

      • MrsPanda says:

        Totally agree Maplegirl, she always comes off so hungry and disingenuous. It’s the same shtick actresses/models do when they say they were such an ”ugly duckling”. Maybe in model school there’s a class named ”Relatable schtick 101”! Even if it is true, I don’t even think it’s that extreme or ”sad” to be honest. We all feel insecure at times and if she’s got post-partum & isn’t feeling 100 percent then comparing herself to other bikini models on Insta may well lead to some tears if her identity is so linked to her bikini body.

    • detritus says:

      I think for me, its more – recognize your privilege, Chrissy.

      There is a specific type of privilege associated with being beautiful, and she is making bank on that. Her entire platform is based on her beauty, her entire career and all her success. If she couched any of this in the terms of her career, to what other women face, to beauty standards and insta modelling as a whole, well then I’d be much more sympathetic.

      Right now its just a wah wah fest because she doesn’t think she has a thin waist and curves and a booty. She is literally upset because shes not the hottest.

      • magnoliarose says:

        @detritus You see it that way and if you told her thousands of times she would believe it for 5 minutes and then back to feeling inadequate. It is her reality. I know what you mean and I respect your viewpoint but she can’t feel anyone else’s problems but her own. She is trying to be open and honest about her vulnerabilities even though she knows she will get eye rolls. It does a service to women for us to realize how pervasive body shaming is how it can overshadow all of the great things in life. I wouldn’t want to live in her head and I am sure most of us wouldn’t want to feel like that.

    • Wilma says:

      It used to irritate me a lot when beautiful people do that too, I’m pretty plain myself and I think that when you’re not really beautiful you have to sort of accept yourself or live a very difficult life full of insecurities. But beautiful people live a very different life and maybe they’re not even aware of how they get treated differently because of their beauty. It must be really difficult when the constant validation slows down or stops. I see this with my sister in law, who has always been the most beautiful person in the room and is now having a really hard time aging. She feels it so much more acutely than I do, because it actually makes a great difference in her life.
      Anyway, I really like Chrissy Teigen. She’s flawed, but I like that about her. She seems like a really nice person.

      • QueenB says:

        “I see this with my sister in law, who has always been the most beautiful person in the room and is now having a really hard time aging”

        Yeah when equality feels like oppression. I read about some women complaining about not being treated like royalty anymore beacuse they are not the hot young thing any longer. Will they be angry about that? Of course but I dont feel bad about people literally being treated like everyone else. They should have been upset that they were treated better before.

      • detritus says:

        Queen B, you said it better than I ever could.

        Wilma, I’ve been on both sides, I know how your sister in law feels to a certain extent. When you buy into a system that shortly discards you.

        A small change in how Chrissy presented this would make all the difference, but this presents like she is only interested in being the hottest.

        This isn’t to diminish how she feels, but to say that in the greater context, she needs to smarten up. You don’t share statements like this except with other model friends, because it sounds judgemental when you are criticising your own 26 inch waist.

    • Veronica says:

      I think it’s actually very revealing about how much this culture works to undermine women mentally and emotionally via their bodies. Women are told both directly and indirectly through media and cultural dialogue that beauty is their most valuable commodity. If very attractive women are made to feel inadequate, it highlights just how insane body standards are and reveals them for what they really – a form of manipulation and control.

    • AA says:

      Just another viewpoint. When I was in my mid 20s-ish, I was @my hottest. I think if I was rated, I would have been generally rated a 7-10/10, dependent on taste. I was and still am incredibly (but improvingly) insecure.

      I saw this thing about a former Miss World/Universe-thing winner and she said she felt she looked absolutely hideous @the time. It didn’t matter that she had just won the most objectified measure of human female beauty in the world and had one of Australia’s richest men pursuing her. She felt as she felt. (I thought she was absolutely stunning and found it hard to believe that she saw something different in the mirror than I did).

      The point being, yes, Chrissy undoubtedly reaps the benefits of being conventionally attractive as I did (free taxi trips, free items at shops, getting jobs, having more mates to choose from, shitloads of attention from men) but the feeling of insecurity doesn’t leave no matter what. For me, it stemmed from having an incredibly critical mother. I, in turn, view myself through an incredibly harsh lens though have literally been working on this issue for decades now.

      • Maple Girl says:

        But why would a person who feels hideous even apply to a beauty contest?

      • detritus says:

        I have a similar history to you AA.

        The thing is, while I was insecure about certain things (i had no boobs woe was me), trust me that I also projected those insecurities on others. If everyone else is well above that, then consider me reprimanded, but most people who are insecure value the things they are insecure about. I valued being slender. I valued presenting in a specific way. If you do not value that stuff, you speak about it in a different way. You are upset because others value it, and put you down, not because others have it and you do not.

      • AA says:

        I can only guess, based on my own experience, that the inner dialogue could be something along the lines of ‘well, I don’t think I’m very hot but I get told all the time that I am so perhaps I am. I’m going to enter this thing and see if I can win it’ – all the whilst being terrified of being laughed out of there. I think a similar thing happens amongst academics called Imposter Syndrome.

        I remember reading a story that Miranda Kerr grew up never feeling pretty. Why? She grew up in a family that never talked about looks. It was only when she won a modelling contest that she started to cotton on …

        Bo Derek has similarly acknowledged that general acceptance of her beauty comes about through her historical and cultural location. Back in the era when Rubenesque bodies were considered the ideal (with thin bodies being equated with poverty), she said she would have been considered too scrawny and shunted off as a scullery maid.

        Look, I understand the skepticism. The same thing applies to money. I’ve never had money in my life until now. I absolutely hated it when a rich friend once said, look, even if you had money, you’d still have problems. I literally wanted to smack him in the face right there and then. I was desperate and looking at not being able to pay my rent for the week (which had never happened to me before, and did end up happening). Now that I have money, BELIEVE ME, the problems are endless. As a former mentor would regularly say to me, the best thing you can hope for in life is a better class of problems. Instead of having difficulty paying the rent, it is difficulty paying the mortgage etc.

      • AA says:

        Hi detritus, I agree. I am the same. I project my inner world outwardly. Are you familiar with Peri Gilpin (Roz Doyle on ‘Frasier’)? I used to watch the show and was absolutely fascinated by her body shape because she wasn’t rail thin and used to consider her fat! These days, I can’t believe it I thought that once, well I can actually …

        I’ve just thought of a better example, in the space of seconds, my toy poodles can look alternately too fat or anorexic. I project my body dysmorphia onto them. (My mum was constantly at me about my weight – I was either too thin or too fat and she was always trying to get me to stop eating or forcing me to eat more.)

        TBH I don’t understand your point. Nowhere did I read Chrissy saying that she doesn’t do these things … ?

    • Embee says:

      Not yelling at all but as a counterpoint: I actually become more insecure and image-focused when I am more attractive. Prior to a series of traumatic events that led to a 45 lb weight gain, I was generally considered extremely attractive (all-American girl face with killer bod), and I felt pressure to dress well, be really ripped/toned, etc. After I gained the weight I wasn’t hideous but I became more invisible, and with people not constantly telling me about my looks I was able to relax (elastic waistbands helped, too lol). I’ve recently repaired my adrenal glands and the weight is falling off and people are commenting on my body again; I feel more anxious when I go out, because people are looking at me. Just another perspective!

      • AA says:

        So scarily true! It just occurred to me that the attractive ppl get told they r attractive constantly. They then get th idea that this is a valuable commodity n fear th loss of it (universal NEED for love n validation). Like I said elsewhere, having more $ now than I’ve ever had before, I had incredible anxiety when recently putting in my engagement ring 4 resizing. Was terrified of stone swapping (another childhood rule was that no one outside th family was 2 b trusted (ironic)). I literally couldn’t sleep n read n read th internet, seeking (outside) reassurance as to its actual incidence rate. Iv put an engagement ring in th past for multiple resizings (previously married n massive weight fluctuations). Not once back then did that fear ever occur 2 me (I had only a relatively modest ring back then). My lack of comparative wealth left me assured of th lack of interest. My current bf n I have this v old Winnebago. Its ugliness n oldness reassures me that VERY few ppl would b interested in stealing it (not knowing there’s literally tens of thousands of dollars’ worth of high-end women’s jewellery n accessories in there). Rich ppl have kidnapping n ransom fears n can spend shitloads of $ on security.

      • snowflake says:

        @embee
        I understand what you are saying. When I am thin, I guess I have a “sexy” body. As in, guys will ogle and make comments. I’m not very comfortable, I don’t want that attention. So I feel like it’s a double edged sword. Like I’m happy I’m closer to a healthy weight, but I also have to deal with come ons. And I hate it. And it sounds horrible, but that’s how I feel.

    • SM says:

      I’m with you @Detritus. I felt stragely annoyed reading this. It feels a bit like those models are just asking for sympathy and attention.

  5. Cherry says:

    Okay, I get what she’s saying and I do feel sorry for her, but my God, boo frickety hoo, Chrissy. Maybe I’m just feeling cranky because I can’t afford to go on all these lovely vacations, and I don’t mean to sound condescending, but her whole life revolves around the fact that she looks pretty on (instagram) photos, you know? That’s her job. It pays. Millions. If she can’t handle it she needs to stop staring at other people’s bikini selfies and, I dunno, go read a book or something.
    EDIT: I guess I’m feeling you, detritus. Your comment just popped up at the same time as mine.

    • Oliphant says:

      I’m with you cherry and detritus- my heart isn’t exactly bleeding for her 🙄

    • detritus says:

      Whats that saying … fools seldom differ? ;)

    • BunnyBabe says:

      Have you heard Jim Carrey’s quote about money, that he wishes everyone could get rich and famous so that they could realize it doesn’t solve all of your problems?

      We are in the emotional dark ages, and a lot of things are coming to the surface at the present moment.

      Everyone has struggles. No one’s struggle is “better” or “worse” than another because we each only have the one perspective. Sure, you could arrange them on a scale of bad to worse, but from that one person’s emotional perspective, just knowing where you are on the scale doesn’t drastically change how you feel about the situation.

      A rich child struggles with living up to their family’s expectations of them.

      A poor child struggles with not having the means to do what they want.

      A pretty child struggles with inappropriate attention from adults.

      An ugly child struggles with being passed over or ridiculed for their looks.

      One struggle does NOT mean the other struggles are invalid. If we are to make progress in this mess we’ve created, we must first begin by saying “I appreciate and validate your emotions” even if you can’t feel them in the same way. We only have one perspective, which is why we must accept the other’s word for it if they say that’s how they feel. People of Color know this most especially. White people think racism is dying. PoC think it’s not. We must listen to PoC because they are feeling these emotions of oppression and prejudice. I can’t fully understand them as a white woman. But I appreciate them in you and I believe you, PoC. I am so very sorry for your pain and I’ve got my ears perked up for anything I can do to help you in your journey each day.

      Now, CT may be promoting her brand with her words, but I have a feeling there is more than a shred of truth there.

      • detritus says:

        This is a nice thought, but I do not agree.

        Some people have struggles worse than others, that is exactly what recognizing your privilege is about, sometimes you don’t have it the worst. While its not the oppression olympics, I can say without a shadow of a doubt that my struggles as a pretty middle class white girl were significantly lesser than my friends struggles as an island girl living in Grenada. Or my other friends struggle as the daugher of an alcoholic.

        There are always people who are struggling with issues that are worse than your own. It shouldn’t make you feel lesser, but it maybe should make you re-evaluate.

      • prettylights says:

        @bunnybabe well said. It’s so true that everyone has struggles in their life. Also that money doesn’t buy happiness or solve all your problems, you just have different ones. I read an article a long time ago about lottery winners. It showed that at first their happiness increased a lot, but after they ‘got used’ to being rich their happiness went back to the same level it was before they had the money.

        One of my favorite quotes is from Robinson Crusoe:

        “It put me upon reflecting how little repining there would be among mankind at any condition of life, if people would rather compare their condition with those that were worse, in order to be thankful, than be always comparing them with those which are better, to assist their murmurings and complaining.”

      • AA says:

        I have to say I mostly agree with you BunnyBabe and also detritus’ reply to you. This issue of relative pain is close to my heart. I identify as a survivor of child sexual assault and have been in recovery from this since 2004. There was this emotional support group that I used to attend and once I got the then-hitherto full remembering of my abuse, got so fucken mad that people who literally got ponies as presents, Switzerland skiing holidays and their photographs taken by Helmut Newton got the approximate same amount of time as I to process my pain.

        Hence then followed 13 years of hell trying to figure out how these people felt their pain was equivalent to mine. I reasoned that my abuse was literally criminal and is classed as the second-worst offence, after murder but this resentment just left me not functioning very well.

        Trying to relieve this pain, I took my boyfriend’s suggestion and started reading Viktor Frankl’s ‘Man’s Search for Meaning.’ Frankl was a psychiatrist and concentration camp survivor. He likened pain to being a gas. Say, everyone’s life is a room. Regardless of how much or little gas there is, it somehow manages to fill the entire space. I add to his analogy, that other people literally have more pain i.e. gas. They have more pain molecules and hence the air is more dense. It is literally harder to breathe and the weight can be fatally oppressive without intervention. I think of suicide. I have had suicidal ideation starting from the age of six (don’t ask me how a six year old starts thinking of offing herself but I did), lasting to last year.

        Yes, everyone has pain. Everyone’s pain seems to fill up their room (life) evenly (that is their only experience of pain). Pain/trauma DOES vary in intensity. This is why there is an international criminal court for war crimes but no such court for prosecution of say when you felt scared ‘cos the fucken pony that you own, ran off with you on it. But I’ve worked on my resentment, truly I have :) Cry me a river indeed.

      • BunnyBabe says:

        @detritus, thanks for the reply. I think the opposite–that while re-evaluation and gratitude is a fantastic daily practice, in the moment it cannot take away the pain. Therefore, I do feel that yours is the nice thought, but in practice so much harder. We need to be appreciated for the way we feel if we ever hope to heal.

        @prettylights I love that quote! Can we put it out on billboards everywhere?!

        @AA I’m so sorry for your pain and trauma. Sending virtual hugs and light to you. Your thoughtful statements show you have a lot to share with the world. Please don’t give up❤️ Have you heard of Teal Swan? Check her out on YouTube and Google her story. She is a survivor as well. You may enjoy her teachings; I know I do.

      • Ani May says:

        @AA – no international court for misbehaving ponies! That’s gold :)

  6. Alleycat says:

    I think she’s being mostly self deprecating. I don’t see her as super insecure, just human in an abnormal environment. We all have our moments and I expect they are tenfold when you’re being judged by millions constantly. I like that she talks about real issues regarding her appearance.

  7. FHMom says:

    I guess I’m supposed to think she’s just like me, but instead I think STFU. She gets to cry to John Legend while the rest of us don’t look like her and have real issues. She would kill herself if she had my thick thighs.

  8. Kat says:

    Odd choice of outfit for Venice in the afternoon.

  9. Barbcat says:

    It just shows you can be pretty, rich, married to a nice man and have a gorgeous child and still be unhappy. Whether she is getting upset about politics or complaining about her looks in social media, she just doesn’t seem to be a happy person. Happiness comes from within and she is struggling.

    Maybe she should pull back and live a more private life and take a break from social media. It apparently is not making her happy.

  10. Francesca Love says:

    Getting bored of her. I don’t buy her insecurity that much. Nobody said, “you need to pose almost naked” after you gave birth. You don’t need to have your boobs constantly haning out (and blame your kid! Did you hear that one?).
    I personally don’t feel like my body compares to models out there, and feel awful about it even if I logically know that there’s all those filters at work, and in return I don’t post certain pictures, end of story. I might take a lovely selfie or whatnot, but I definitely don’t pose in the exact same poses as the ones I envy! Ugh, she’s not relatable.

  11. Alexandria says:

    I kind of get it, she is in an industry where she’s surrounded by tall leggy young girls. So it’s hard not to have moments of insecurity. Working on your self esteem is almost always a work in progress. Sometimes you have bad days. Sometimes you think you’re alright. If it gets bad, unfollow on social media as a first step. There are already studies that suggest social media envy is real and unhealthy.

  12. Shelley says:

    She has the problem and needs therapy. She has an insane cycle of wanting and not wanting attention. I follow Doutzen on IG and while she’s pretty not every picture is perfect etc. I question CT to walk around constantly on vacay with her boobs hanging out and heels while husband is always comfortable in flat shoes. You see this in her red carpet appearances where it’s always about her even though the husband is getting the award. Part of her problem, CT is not the supermodel material of the past (Christy, Naomi) that makes folks excited about their pictures because they have “it”. CT needs to find her niche like Klum did and make it her own.

  13. Lori says:

    I think Chrissy is adorable, I have her on instagram and snapchat. I wish she had her own show. I wanted to watch the fab life but it got cancelled before being available in my country.

  14. Miss S says:

    People feel the way they feel in a specific context. Which is their context and probably very different from ours. Just because in my world she would be seen as a goddess I don’t feel the need to invalidate what she is sharing. Yeah, if I had her money and looked like her I think I would be happy, but she lives in a context where beauty is scrutinized at a level most women don’t deal with so I guess that it is natural to lose perspective, because she doesn’t compare herself to the regular woman on the street, but the super models.

  15. la_maga says:

    Regardless of whether I like her or not, I get what she’s saying. First of all, depression is relative only to you–when you are clinically depressed, it doesn’t matter if the sun is shining or you have perfect teeth or make good money. It’s intrinsic, and it’s devastating. Second of all, her world is not the common person’s world. She’s not surrounded by normals; she’s surrounded by people who are “technically more perfect-looking”, have their lives seemingly totally together, are incredibly wealthy, and have even more opportunities than she does. It’s like a scenario in which the more gorgeous, smartest person in Nowheresville is usually just going to be another footnote in an metropolitan city (most of the time). I think she does understand she has immense privilege, but she’s not going to come out and say she would be the hottest person in your spin class in Ohio. Because that’s not her environment, that’s not her competitions, those are not her rivals or peers. *Note: not saying she is better than anyone, just pointing out how different her world is.

    • Miss S says:

      I also believe that because she knows how privileged she is, she feels even more guilty because “she doesn’t have the right to complain”. Whatever she feels in her world isn’t really relatable for most people, so she won’t get much goodwill for this kind of observations.

    • Alexandria says:

      La Maga yes exactly. This is not the same as lamenting because you were not granted the title of King Consort. She is privileged, wealthy and not bad looking, but it’s healthier to share real insecurities while acknowledging what you have and what other’s don’t have. It can be because of people dismissing celebrities that they need therapy. Celebrity breakdowns are not rare. They are also people. I think this is harmless to share and she doesn’t come across (to me) as expecting pity. If I were to grow up and grow old in the celeb world, my self esteem index would fluctuate.

  16. Anilehcim says:

    I kind of hate that some posters here make the assertion that because Chrissy is a SI model, she can’t be insecure and that she must be making this up to make herself seem relatable. Everyone has insecurities. I think it’s kind of cruel to try to say hers are invalid because some people may view them as less of an issue than others.

    I’m a millennial, and I think most people think I’m weird or boring because I can’t say enough bad things about social media. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely love Instagram, but I tend to keep my account pretty private and I only follow things that I love and/or can learn from. Occasionally on what I assume is a “suggestions page” a Kardashian/Jenner or a clone of them will pop up and it just makes me feel like shit. Not about myself, but about society as a whole. Everyone wants to look like Kim K or one of her sisters now and it’s so sad and pathetic. Instagram models all look exactly the same. I find it really troubling that young girls are saving their money up for lip injections instead of just learning to love themselves. To me, learning to really accept and love yourself is such a crucial part of the human experience and it’s important for all of us… we struggle with it especially in our youth but as we grow older, we tend to grow comfortable in our skin and I just think that’s important and it’s beautiful. I honestly blame the Kardashians for the amount of young people who think they need injections and surgery before their bodies are even done forming.

    tl;dr Social media sucks and I blame the Kardashians for the IG model craze, where every young woman looks like a 5th Kardashian sister.

    • magnoliarose says:

      This is part of what I was trying to say. I think it is wrong to invalidate anyone’s feelings. Does she seem happy to you? What secure woman dresses like she does to stroll around Venice. Then think about a model like Gisele who isn’t afraid to be seen without makeup, jeans and a t-shirt. She is barely on social media. Sure she can be full of herself but I would bet her life feels happier to her than Chrissy’s does.

      The IG models are irritating and not just because I think they suck for the most part but because I think they are dangerous for impressionable girls. With professional photographs, it is not available if a girl isn’t a professional model so it feels far away and not easily obtainable. It is set up as fantasy, not real life. IG models make it seem real when it is an even bigger lie. All of them get obvious plastic surgery and filter and shop themselves into oblivion. Usually, the makeup is horrible, and they pose in real situations making it seem obtainable. They buy followers in huge numbers and validate themselves that way. It is a symptom of this sickness that permeates our culture. The pendulum is going to swing the other way. It is the fate of things, and they will look dated and fake. Fashion is always looking for something new and fresh and then it will be maybe fresh-faced and sporty.

  17. Nancy says:

    I find her so annoying. With everything going on in the world, she is crying about aesthetics. She is screaming for attention, oh I’m so ugly…..no you’re beautiful Chrissy. Another Kardashian with a different name, same agenda. Go away.

  18. JeanGrey says:

    Eh I get it. Growing up my “attributes” were supposed to be so enviable by a certain group of peers, but nothing to write home about by another group. I was tall and skinny and people who were into that sort of thing thought I was soo lucky. But I didn’t care about being tall and slim I wanted to be curvy and I hated being taller than all or most of the girls and a lot of the guys , because a lot of people in my culture found that look to be the most coveted. So I was very insecure and had an inferiority complex. I guess it depends on how you view yourself and others. Lucky for my own perspective, i grew into my curves and am at a thickness I can appreciate. But more so, I also accept my body more now than I did when I was a teen/young adult. But I can see where someone who is perceived to be “beautiful” by one group can feel inadequate if they think they should look another way.

  19. Andrea says:

    Everyone has insecurities. Its human nature and it not just a female problem. Men have it as well. I like that she’s talking about it and hopefully it leads to a positive conversation about what is healthy. On a side note – her red lip is amazing. What a great colour .

  20. Bellswell says:

    This proves the point that comparison is the theft of happiness, regardless of who you are. I feel for you Chrissy – it’s not easy to be a woman at all, much less one who bears the constant weight of public scrutiny.

    One thing that really bothers me about this site is how every time a celebrity woman gets candid and vulnerable, she’s immediately dismissed and labeled as ‘extra.’ Chrissy, Jenny Slate, Kristen Bell..what is wrong with us that we sense one moment of insecurity and use it as an excuse to contemptuously dismiss them? Frankly, we’ve got plenty of men around to dismiss us already, and it just feeds the narrative that women are bitches to each other. It’s really disheartening and troll-ish.

    • magnoliarose says:

      It makes me sad and sometimes I don’t say things because I know it will fall wrong, so I save my controversial feminist views for other places in my life. I just wish we could have very real conversations about womanhood and appreciate everyone’s experiences without derision. Chrissy is admitting something painful. Do we now grade each other’s pain? It is hard to come to a good place where you are able to drown out the noise and pressure to accept each other and ourselves.

    • snowflake says:

      Yeah, I agree with you. No matter who you are, most people feel insecure about certain things. And just cause she’s has more money, better body, than most of us, that does not make her immune to insec. And her insecurities are no less valid.

  21. Cinderella says:

    I really want to like her, but I can’t pity her. I really can’t. I’m not buying what she’s selling. She has everything…more than most of us. If she is suffering that bad mentally, she needs to talk to her doctor and stay off of social media. If anything, I think she suffers from “all eyes on me” syndrome.

  22. Pandy says:

    So go get lipo or non invasive Sculp Sure or something – you have the funds!! Shut your pie hole Chrissy. God she’s irritating.

  23. OriginallyBlue says:

    Ya, I find her very annoying and exhausting. She needs therapy or to find something else to occupy herself.

  24. blonde555 says:

    Ugh go away.
    T*ts hanging out of her dress walking her son, crying wolf. She’s annoying as hell. Still vapid as ever.

  25. Twink says:

    How do you not take your makeup off at night. Yuuukkkk! I wear a full face everyday BUT I take it all off and then lather all the skim care products! Would hate to stain my pillow and sheets with all my bronzer! 😂😂

  26. perplexed says:

    If even models are feeling not good enough when they see other people’s pictures, I think that says something about bad the media industry seems to be making all women feel. That’s what I took away from her comments.

  27. Jamieee says:

    She’s just so tiring.

    She’s not a real model anymore, her cooking thing went nowhere, and she serves no real purpose on Lipsync Battle. If she’s uncomfortable with the scrutiny she gets, all she has to do is stop with the constant attention-seeking stunts and tweets. It’s not like she has a proper job that requires her to promote herself. She could easily disappear and live a life where her looks don’t matter so much if she wanted to.

  28. April says:

    She has a super figure, but I don’t find her attractive beyond that. She is a cute girl but that’s it. I never understood how she achieved model status.

  29. Jaded says:

    She needs to value herself for things other than her physical beauty. As beautiful women age, they either go off the deep end with endless cosmetic procedures, over-exercising, dressing like a 21 year old and sleeping with men young enough to be their grandsons (side-eye at Madonna) OR they realize they can have a life filled with the richness of learning, writing, art, philanthropy, and don’t give a small rodent’s posterior about grey hair, wrinkles and cellulite. WE ALL GET OLD. I was always lauded for my beauty when I was young – and didn’t have great self-esteem despite the attention I got because I felt like I had nothing else to offer. Now that I’m coming up on my 65th birthday I still look good for my age but boy have I got self-esteem oozing out of my pores. I don’t dye my hair, I refuse to botox or inject or sandpaper my skin. I’ve survived breast cancer, fallen back in love with an old boyfriend from the seventies who thinks I’m as beautiful now as I was then, and have embraced life as a Reiki teacher/practitioner, painter and writer. In other words, I’m fulfilled, not terrified of life without youth. I prefer myself as I am now, not as I was and wouldn’t go back to those years if you paid me.

    • Bitsy says:

      @Jaded, I bet you’re beautiful. You sound beautiful. More than the narrative of women having to be slim and perky to be hot, I’m sick of the one that believes only the young are beautiful. Everyday I see amazing women in their 60s and 70s. I think true beauty comes from within and shines brighter with maturity and wisdom. Notice I didn’t say age… someone like Chrissy will never be wise, mature, or beautiful. (I dislike her immensely). My aunt is 60 and is truly at her peak. Stunning! I only say she’s peaked now because as she gets older she has become cranky. My neighbor is 85, does yoga every morning, pops bottles at block parties, has a boyfriend, and is beautiful. Age doesn’t dictate beauty. Someone like Angela Basset, Halle Berry, or Elizabeth Hurley will always look better than women like Chrissy. They are confident where Chrissy is arrogant; they are charismatic where Chrissy is loud; they have exercised and refined their minds and spirit where Chrissy excerises her bank account on procedures.
      We all ought to celebrate beauty that shines through in deeds, words, and actions.

    • Ani May says:

      @jaded ~ You sound like a wonderful person with an intetresing life – I want to be you when I “grow up”!

  30. Amyday says:

    This is why we need to raise our girls to have their self esteem anchored in much meaningful things than appearance. 15 years ago, I was very hot. Honestly I did enjoy the attention to a certain degree, but my self esteem did not come from that (thankfully!). I was proud of doing well in high school, and working hard for my engineering degree… among other things. Here I am almost 40, pregnant with baby 4, (never lost the baby weight after baby 3), I am 40 lbs heavier (prior to the pregnancy) on a 5’1 frame than I was back then and I am not crying over it. I certainly hope to get back to a healthier weight one day, but I am acutely aware that my value does not lie in my appearance. Being kind to others, loving, and the best mom and wife I can be on any given day are at the top of my list. I hope that I can pass this on to my girls the way my mom did to me. Her weight fluctuated wildly throughout my childhood but I never heard her say anything disparaging about her looks. Her confidence came from within.

  31. A says:

    ugh I used to like her but now she’s just plain insufferable.

  32. It bugs me when women put themselves down especially when it comes to weight. I’ve witnessed a 115 pound girl refuse a cookie because she was afraid she’d get fat. I’m right at 200, struggle everyday with it, and for her to say that made me feel like a beach whale. Something’s are best to be kept to yourself. If a beautiful person calls themselves ugly/fat then a normal person will feel like a troll.

    • imqrious2 says:

      I used to cringe when I would hear the 6,7, and 8 year olds I taught say they were fat: they were PERFECTLY NORMAL sized kids! And I do mean “normal”, not even having, what we sometimes refer to as “puppy fat”. And yes, a lot would refuse to eat a treat at a class birthday or holiday party, because they were afraid of getting “fat”. I had one girl who told me her mother weighed her every morning when she woke up to make sure she (the girl) “was staying on track”. After talking to the Principal, who told me to have it come from the school nurse, I talked to our (visiting) school nurse and asked her to talk to the mother. The nurse did, but told me that she had very little hope of changing this mother’s view, and would just most likely be told to butt out and mind her own business (that is exactly what happened). The mother even came to school to yell at me and the Principal for having “sicced the *weight gestapo* on her” SMDH. Insane, really!!

  33. Luci Lu says:

    She’s an attractive woman, with a decent figure. She’s also an intelligent, experienced, desperate attention-whore, void of any real natural talent, who will do whatever it takes to keep her name and likeness, out there, in the atmosphere, for all to see, and “admire”, 24/7, whether we like it or not. She is fortunate enough to have the love and support of her famous singer/composer/producer husband, John Legend, that allows her, (and, most-likely members of her immediate family), to live the luxurious charmed life that many of us can only dream of. She can also afford to pay the best plastic surgeon(s) in all of Hollywood to change her body/face into any woman that she claims to admire, on Instagram. I see you Chrissy.

  34. L says:

    Good luck walking around Venice in those shoes, lady. Lol!

  35. Big D says:

    Jeez, some people just cant be satisfied.
    She’s beautiful, well off, has a beautiful healthy child that would ordinarily take up a lot of your time and would always remind you where your priorities are and a successful husband who seemingly adores her and she’s crying coz some model looks hotter than her? What is wrong with just trying to look your best and not worrying about the rest?
    She may be optically attractive but this intense neediness and insecurity is unattractive and a total turn off.

    As Chandler would say, way too much free time..

  36. Ms. Kimmy says:

    my goodness that is a thick mask of make-up Ms. Chrissy has on there.

    I see now why she’s so buddy-buddy with Kimmy K – a pair of clown make-up thirst traps tsk tsk.

    you do you, baby.

  37. Bitsy says:

    Shut up Chrissy. You are a study in contradictions and lack of self-awareness. Chrissy constantly shames others and especially women, even little girls (Quanzhene Wallis) yet has the nerve to be sensitive and emotional? Classic narcissistic bully. She loves attention, thrives on it, and must pull focus at all costs, hence this comment. I do believe she cried at someone else’s picture in the gram, but not because she is insecure, but maybe that person got more likes? I doubt she’d cry over any of the millions of better looking women who only get F&F (friends n family) likes of 60 or 70. Almost every woman i know looks better than her but if she saw their vacation posts with a measley 25 likes she wouldn’t give 2 nuts.
    Shut it and be happy your average-at-best self pulled an Ivy League-educated millionaire super star who seems to actually really like you. Cuz we’re all stumped.

  38. snowflake says:

    You guys are being way too harsh on her. Everyone has insecurities.

  39. Shelley says:

    Chrissy annoys me so much, and I do think she is fake and attention seeker. But as a general rule, I disagree with invalidating other people’s body insecurities. Even if we think they are conventionally attractive.
    Often insecurities about our physical appearances are not about the actual body, but simply manifest in that way. It is easier to obsess about something we can physically see and measure.

  40. monette says:

    I think she has had a shock, the shock of her life actually and because her brand is TMI we are getting access to it.
    What is the shock? All her adult life she was considered hot and beautiful because she is an apple ( thin, long legs, big boobs), almost the only body type that SI deems attractive.
    She has made a career out of her apple body type, has based her whole life worth on it and now Bang! Apple is out Kardashian type is in ( tiny waist, big ass).
    Of course she wants to cry, there is nothing you cam’t do to change your body type, no amount of dieting or exercise will do.
    From my point of view, it sucks, but also life is a balance, you cashed on smt you didn’t work for, at one point it’s going to be taken away from you.
    So my advice would be therapy and learn to get your satisfaction from working on smt other than your looks!

  41. Patty says:

    She needs to stop. Clearly she has all kinds of issues and insecurities; she should share and work through that with a therapist not via social media. This goes beyond comparing herself to others. The woman is obsessed with the superficial and looking good. Obsessed.

    It’s not just that she has insecurities, we all do. It’s her obsession with appearance and the constantly needed to be validated or ballyhooing over people she doesn’t even know. It’s like she never learned to deal with the fact that there will alsways be someone prettier, smarter, wealthier, cooler, etc than you.

    The woman is fundamentally shalllow and values herself only based o her she looks in comparison to others. That’s an issue that needs to be addressed with a professional.

  42. Zondie says:

    Remember when Chrissie was a little girl and she realized that beauty fades so she better develop some other skills, like brains and kindness? Oh wait, that was me not this vacuous women.

  43. nicegirl says:

    I think she is absolutely physically beautiful. I would love it if my physical body resembled hers, alas, mine is more ‘weird, wonky ass pear, alien looking’ than supermodel. Ah, well.

  44. Naddie says:

    And the instagram model she envies cries because she compaers herself to someone else… No one is safe when looks are the validation coin.