Prince William’s ‘next act’ is the new Tatler cover story & it’s just pure propaganda

This feels like Kensington Palace trying to push back on their own clownish behavior. Prince William covers the May issue of Tatler, and while he didn’t give an interview to the magazine, make no mistake, he and his team absolutely approved of the cover story. It’s a lengthy, overwrought piece in which they try to convince their readers that William is doing great, thanks for asking, and he’s stepping up and stepping into his “next act.” Tatler’s Wesley Kerr recites William’s royal titles like Huevo achieved these things through merit. Kerr also tries to pretend that William and his staffers haven’t been engaged in months of clownery, clownery which has significantly destabilized the monarchy. You can read the full piece here, I’m not going to excerpt many highlights because this is one of the most contemptible pieces of royal propaganda I’ve ever seen. Just unbridled sycophancy, with absolutely zero new information.

Grand but different: William is grand but different, royal but real. At 6ft 3in, he has the bearing and looks great in uniform after a distinguished, gallant military career. He will be one of the tallest of Britain’s kings since Edward Longshanks in the 14th century and should one day be crowned sitting above the Stone of Scone that Edward ‘borrowed’. William, by contrast, has a deep affinity with Scotland and Wales, having lived in both nations and gained solace from the Scottish landscape after his mother died. He’s popular in America and understands that the Crown’s relationship to the Commonwealth must evolve.

Time to step up: The Prince of Wales’s time has come to step up; and so he has deftly done. In recent months, we have seen a fully-fledged deputy head of state putting into practice his long-held ideas, speaking out on the most contentious issue of the day and taking direct action on homelessness.

William’s BAFTA appearance:
More stardust followed when William showed that, even without his wife by his side, he could outclass any movie star at the Baftas. There’s also his immense aim of helping to ‘repair the planet’ itself with his Earthshot Prize: five annual awards of £1 million for transformative environmental projects with worldwide application. This project has a laser focus on biodiversity, better air quality, cleaner seas, reducing waste and combating climate change. Similar aims to his father; different means to achieve the goal.

Charles’s approach was to work constantly: As Prince of Wales, [Charles] was involved in the minutiae of dozens of issues at any one time, working into the night to follow up on emails, crafting his speeches, writing or dictating notes. Add to that much nationwide touring over 40 years (after he left active military service in 1976), fitting in multiple engagements, often being greeted formally by lord lieutenants. This is not William’s style. He has commended his father’s model, but he does things his own way. Although patronages are under review, William has up till now far fewer than either his father or his grandparents.

Valentine Low is a big Huevo fan: ‘He defuses the formality with jocularity,’ says Valentine Low, citing two public events in 2023 that he witnessed. In October, Low reported, William ‘unleashed his inner flirt as he hugged his way through a visit with Caribbean elders [in Cardiff] to mark Black History Month. As he gave one woman a hug – for longer than she expected – he joked: “I draw the line at kissing.” And while posing for a group photograph, he prompted gales of laughter when he quipped: “Who is pinching my bottom?”’ Low believes that when William eventually becomes king, he will be more ‘radical’ than his father but wonders if people will respond to ‘call me William’ when ‘the whole point of the Royal Family is mystique and being different’. However, William has thought deeply about his current role and is prepared for whatever his future holds.

The kids’ schooling: For now, there is a decision to be made on Prince George’s secondary schooling. It’s said that five public schools are being considered, all fee-paying. Eton is single-sex and boarding but close to home. Marlborough (Kate’s alma mater) is co-ed and full boarding. And Oundle, St Edward’s Oxford and Bradfield College (close to Kate’s parents) are co-ed with a mix of boarding and day.

[From Tatler]

Having read/skimmed the whole piece, this is not an underhanded, shady takedown like Tatler’s infamous “Kate the Great” debacle in 2020. It’s just straight propaganda, as they’re trying to rewrite very recent history before our eyes. They can’t say that William showed up under the influence at an investiture or that he was a crude buffoon at the BAFTAs, but do they have to lie about it completely? It’s also notable just how few mentions there are of Kate. While she’s not completely ignored, it’s clear that this is about William alone and how HE is stepping up and it’s HIS next act.

Photos courtesy of Instar, cover courtesy of Tatler.

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96 Responses to “Prince William’s ‘next act’ is the new Tatler cover story & it’s just pure propaganda”

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  1. seaflower says:

    He never looks comfortable or at ease in his military dress uniforms – like he knows he’s playing a role he’s no good at.

  2. Flowerlake says:

    He looks miserable on that cover.

    • Jais says:

      Just realized that uniform is from the Caribbean tour? They blacked out the background on the cover but Kaiser included the actual pics below. An interesting image to reference. It was his very own callback to an empire moment.

      • BeanieBean says:

        That was my thought, too! Did they really mean to remind people of the Caribbean Flop Tour??? With him & Kate in that jeep??

    • Jan90067 says:

      He always looks like he’s in a room full of gassy people, and he’s the only one in the room with a sense of smell.

      • ecsmom says:

        That is a look of someone that has just realized that his poop does not in fact smell good.

  3. MaryContrary says:

    So wading into the middle east controversy and skipping his godfather’s memorial service at the 11th hour are signs of what, exactly?

  4. Beenie says:

    It’s weird to me that writing crap like this is somebody’s job.

    • Lady D says:

      Ditto. It’s a head shaker.

    • Normal_Islander says:

      Could be AI…

      • AMB says:

        “ChatGPT, write me an article about the Prince of Wales highlighting his good qualities using the voice of the UK press.”

    • Hel says:

      Maybe I give too much credit to Tatler but it seems to me very sarcastic ? It’s so overwrought, talking so much about his height as if it’s its greatest qualityas the future King, describing Charles extensive work and ending by a curt “This is not William’s style”, retelling his bad jokes that I didn’t even know about?

      • Saucy&Sassy says:

        Hel, that’s what I thought when I read it–it’s sarcasm. A whole lot of shade.

      • Smart&Messy says:

        At one point in the last two weeks, the Fail had a whole ass article about how William is always the tallest person in the room. It was littered with photos of him with famous people who are shorter than him, even at the cost of hurting Tom Cruise’s feelings. So yeah, they mean it. He is tall, therefore he is king material.

  5. No Peg is a one trick pony. He is mister chaos. He doesn’t know what he is doing. Seems everything he has touched is shattering into a million theories and conspiracies. There is no next act and they can try all they want by polishing this turd but it’s still a turd.

    • Elizabeth Regina says:

      He’s a rapidly balding, no charisma, bad tempered egg head. Many know that his reign will be worse than Charles’ and that’s saying something. Lord knows he needs as much propaganda as he can get because many are not buying it.

  6. Agnes says:

    “He defuses the formality with jocularity.” Hahaha, no. He DOES looks ridiculous in uniform, though, like something out of a Gilbert and Sullivan operetta or a Village People video. Interesting headline “Detox like a Duchess.” Of Cornwall?

    • BeanieBean says:

      Somebody at some point needs to sit that man down & tell him he’s not funny. Don’t try it, Billy, just don’t. Be pleasant, but do NOT attempt jocularity, you just can’t do it.

    • JanetDR says:

      @Agnes, Detox like a Dutchess really leaps off the page doesn’t it?!

      • Saucy&Sassy says:

        JanetDR, that’s immediately what I focused on when I saw that magazine cover. Wow! What is that all about? Is someone trying to tell us something?

    • FlamingHotCheetos2021 says:

      Well, someone has to carry on Prince Philips’ illustrious legacy of offensive jokes at others’ expense.

  7. MAX says:

    He perpetually looks like he’s smelling something unpleasant.

  8. Becks1 says:

    If lines like this aren’t meant to be shady, and are sheer propaganda –

    “At 6ft 3in, he has the bearing and looks great in uniform after a distinguished, gallant military career.”

    Then the UK really has veered into NK territory. A distinguished, gallant military career?!!?!? AYFKM???

    Who is KP trying to convince with this? The aristos? The great unwashed masses? Its like KP is trying desperately to convince someone that William may be lazy but he’s tall and we promise that means he’ll be a great king!!!!!

    • Agnes says:

      I don’t know how they can write such slimy BS without having to take a shower at the same time!

    • Noo says:

      Also I love that they are leading with his height as one of his great assets to be king???

      This is part of my bimodal height distribution of male executives theory. Many tall men have been promoted into positions of leadership simply because of their height. They played some sports and were used to people looking up to them all the time and became very comfortable with that. There’s more to my theory, but looks like they’re leaning into that in the propaganda.

      • Relly says:

        Oh my gosh I came down here to mention this, it’s hilarious that it starts with “let’s talk about William’s good traits! For starters, he’s … Tall. Definitely tall.”

        It reminds me of the rumor that Trump chose Pence as his VP because he looked the most like a VP would on TV.

      • Keekey says:

        Ha! Henry the 8th was also tall. Just sayin’ …

      • Water Lilly says:

        I’m envisioning Kate as Olive Oyl, singing the song from the movie Popeye 🤣

        “He’s tall
        Good looking
        And he’s large
        He’s large
        Large
        Tall
        Large
        So large”

      • Elizabeth says:

        This theory about tall men being promoted because of their height makes so much sense when it comes to one of my previous bosses. He apparently had a file drawer in HR filled with complaints from women who’d worked with/for him, but he still got promoted to managing director.

    • ML says:

      I’m not going to read the article, because quite frankly, the excerpts are enough to convince me that this is terrible timing for Tatler. I have no idea when the article was written, however, since K’s surgery was announced midway through January, William has sabotaged this author in the most thorough way possible. Taking time off to care for K, but only visiting the hospital once. Swaying on his feet twice in public. Disappearing. Canceling 45 minutes before his godfather’s memorial where he was due to do a reading. The Mother’s Day Frankenphoto. Attacking his brother and SIL. Not showing up for his cancer-stricken father.
      Just these excerpts alone are pure comedy gold in how opposite they are to reality.

    • BeanieBean says:

      I got the impression they’re writing about William the way they write about Kate–there’s no there, there so they write about their looks. William is tall & looks good in a uniform, Kate is thin & looks good in coat dresses or jeggings. That’s it, that’s all they’ve got going on for themselves. And William’s lineage.

      • TeamMontecito says:

        …and maybe a few quid in the bank, but you’re exactly right. They are not just boring, they lack intellectual curiosity and culture. I can’t think of an instance when either expressed an original thought. I think of all the other monarchs, and Khate is just an embarrassment. Take Maxima, who is formidably innovative and engaging. Mathilde is shy but also well-educated and hard-working. Letizia and Mary ditto. They all had careers before tiaras. Now, they all drive work that that intersects with the UN. These two are just lazy and entitled. What’s on their global agenda besides the basic colonial parade in the white Range Rover followed by greeting with children through chain-linked fences? So fresh, so modern indeed.

    • Eurydice says:

      Shaquille O’Neal is even taller – maybe he should be king.

    • BlueNailsBetty says:

      I’m just going to leave this here. Don’t eat or drink while watching it.

      https://www.tiktok.com/@101waystoagreenlifestyle/video/7198283635672223018

    • Laura D says:

      I’m glad you pointed out the “distinguished” army career @Becks because if you (or someone-else) hadn’t done so, I would have. I would also probably been banned because the air turnt blue around me when I read that little gem! He may become the head of the military once his father passes but there is no absolutely no way on this earth can he persuade anyone that he has served in the military with any sort of distinction.

      William didn’t want his brother to help injured veterans find a purpose to their new way of life. The very same veterans who fought so bravely for both QUEEN and country. He can’t even be bothered to send those injured veterans a message of goodwill when they’re representing their country (once again) at the IGS. Yet all he has to do is put on a uniform and the likes of Tatler think that gives him a “distinguished” military career.

      I’m gonna step away from the keyboard now because my blood pressure is about to sky rocket! Distinguished military career my arse!

  9. Thelma says:

    Distinguished military career??!!! I almost spat my tea out. This is an insult to real veterans.

  10. Shawna says:

    This was the best picture they could find? At least Kate’s passive-aggressive hit piece had a genuinely stunning photo attached.

    Their greatest compliment is “he’s tall.” That’s it. ROFL.

    Accusing Afro-Caribbean English ladies as wanting his physical favors is straight up disgusting.

    This was written before his Kate-bus-running-over started to backfire. Tatler, you’ve got egg on your face!

  11. Ann says:

    This is more like The Onion: “More stardust followed when William showed that, even without his wife by his side, he could outclass any movie star at the Baftas.” This is just one sentence of many that makes me cringe. I’m almost embarrassed for him. NO, he is not popular in America. He got booed in Boston, remember?

    • Agnes says:

      That is truly an unbelievable take.

    • Nanea says:

      Who are they kidding?

      We all saw the video of him walking in.

      All the big stars ignored him, something he very much deserved. They continued chatting.

      No one cares for him. Not at the BAFTAS, not at the UNO, not in Davos – where he was a last minute addition, or an afterthought, and Angie and Max didn’t quite know what to make of him

    • First comment says:

      @Ann, they are really terrible at this and they are trying to outwash his complete ignorance and his awful comments about “having a good time during filming ” to the young actress who played in it just because there was the word sex in the title of the film.
      Edit to add: it’s been almost 2 months from Baftas and his decorative presence there, I have almost forgotten the whole incident..I can’t believe that so much has happened since then 😳

  12. Jks says:

    This is more ‘North Korea’ than North Korea. North Koreans are going to be envious. Kim Jung Un is taking notes.

  13. BeyondTheFringe says:

    There aren’t enough buckets in the world to hold the vomit threatening to violently erupt from my gullet after reading those excerpts.

  14. Tessa says:

    Edward longshanks must be spinning in his grave seeing workshy descendant. Also I am laughing at praise of how great wiliam looks in his uniform. What next act. To continue complaining about harry and meghan.

  15. Tessa says:

    This is hilarious. Is the great feat of William taking over a military helicopter to a bachelor party included.

  16. Mooney says:

    Gallant military career!!! Why are y’all laughing? Don’t you know he has invaded and conquered almost all of the Europe and America,slayed many evil dragons and saved princesses (and got rid of the black one), champion of poor, enemy of enemy and friend of the masses, all hail the great future king huevo….

    Ok I can’t take it anymore 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  17. Jais says:

    Grand but different, royal but real. That line is taking me out 😂😂😂. And Valentine Low citing his jocularity is interesting . William’s jokes are so awkward and bad. They’re not even dad humor. They’re just massively cringe.

  18. sevenblue says:

    “More stardust followed when William showed that, even without his wife by his side, he could outclass any movie star at the Baftas.”

    lol. It is like they are living in a different world where the shocked faces of the young actresses because of inappropriate Will didn’t happen.

    • Tessa says:

      Is this a reference to William wanting hot single dad image.

    • Relly says:

      They’re also living in a world where Will didn’t make funny jokes about the movie with a rape scene.

      • ⁰Sid says:

        I’ve seen people argue that the balding is what messes up his looks because it makes his head look longer. Well, I think this cover shot can put that theory to rest. Balding palate and forehead covered up by the military cap and he still looks …like he looks. Heartthrob Willileaks from once upon a looong time ago is gone like the dodo bird.

  19. Tessa says:

    Oh dear William puts down his father’s work habits which were successful. I guess will going his own way means avoiding work.

  20. Lau says:

    Is this “distinguished, gallant military career” in the room with us right now ?
    This piece is so bad it’s absolutely perfect for William, He truly deserved to be mocked for pulling that kind of stuff thinking that it will work.

  21. GDubslady says:

    With William’s there’s always a fascist tone and hard edge in his presentation. He’s sided with the extreme Right Wing zealots and possibly Putin. His troll army, his rota have transitioned from attacking Harry and Meghan to attacking freedom of speech. They attack the Sussex Squad as terrorists and demand they be removed from platforms bc they support the Sussexes. William only wants on narrative in the public sphere; his. He will make a very dangerous King.

  22. Sunday says:

    I mean, a cover that leans in to the cut-out look of an edited photo with a sub-head of “Detox like a Duchess” is definitely not propaganda.

    This sort of piece is obvious and embarassing within the context of Tatler, but when these quotes and sentiments are removed from their tongue-in-cheek wrappings and presented as whole truths without the snark they become a problem.

    We don’t need US media breathlessly quoting how Will “defuses the formality with jocularity,” we need the full context of how the person being trotted out to wax poetic about skills that Will very obviously does not have is also the person who admitted to being aware of Meghan’s su*cidal ideation and laughed about it on a podcast as he and his colleagues continued to abuse her at the behest of his jocular leader.

  23. HeatherC says:

    It’s the epitome of class to tell an actress she must have enjoyed making a film where her character was raped just because the movie title has the word “sex” in it. Tee hee!

    Also it might be a propaganda article but that cover photo is anything but flattering! “The Other Brother” article he had had a better cover.

  24. Bluenoser says:

    Thank you, Kaiser, for taking the hit, and reading and excerpting this propaganda piece for us.

    I didn’t have my glasses on, so thought the heading below was “Monarchy on the Rocks” as Peg’s next act. Which it actually is.

  25. what's inside says:

    Billy is no actor and has no star power, typical for the House of Windsor. He does however have delusions of grandeur.

  26. Vanessa says:

    This is literally pure propaganda and gaslighting at this point they are literally trying to brainwash the public into believing all this nonsense. For decades William and Kate have been lie to public about everything and now that the rose color glasses are falling off they are running around trying to manipulate the public with photoshop pictures to fake look likes . We all seen William behaving weird being drunk swaying back forth telling a young actress that she must of have fun doing a movie about sex which ended with a character being assault. Everything that has happened has been William and Kate only doing their arrogance Their egotistical behavior William is behaving like tyrant he wants to be able to do what he wants he wants the freedom that Meghan and Harry have .

  27. Michelle says:

    Horrible posture!

  28. Sue says:

    The choice of that picture is, well, a choice. Partly because as others have noted it was taken from the disaster tour but also because it’s not a current one. William is not aging well and the last few years have been especially unkind to him. They probably couldn’t find anything recent that made him look like the hot single dad he so obviously wants to be.

  29. Maxine Branch says:

    These type of articles are exactly why this middle aged man is where he is today. He is struggling because the really believes this nonsense. Quite a pathetic relationship they have with the press in the UK.

  30. Mslove says:

    Tatler magazine seems to forget that Peg’s wife is missing. The next act would be to find her?

  31. Amy Bee says:

    Royal Propaganda galore. An unknowledgeable person would be believe that he has always been charismatic and congenial but we know that William has been told that he has to and has tried to be more like Harry since he left the family. I don’t think KP will have any objections to this Tatler piece.

  32. Mary Pester says:

    Oh god, I’ve just been a little bit sick in my mouth!
    William looks good on his uniform HAT because it hides his Royal solar panel and shades that fugly face.
    He “found solace in Scotland after his mother died”, and what did harry find in Scotland, because it wasn’t fucking solace!
    All willy found was staff to yell at and animals to shoot, then get pssd in the evening. Wales, another affinity. No Wales was where he had his s. G pad with keen and demanded lots and lots of time of from air sea rescue or seats taken out for cameras we know he loves the BAFTAS because he loves rubbing shoulders with all the celebrities, yes he DEFINITELY thinks he is one.
    By the way, A bit more tea. Billy and bone already have plans to invade the US this year
    They are planning for both to go BUT also planning for the single statesman. This is a follow on from his mail shot to the US

    • Eurydice says:

      They’re going to infest the US during the height of an election year? Nice timing.

      • Tessa says:

        Maybe he can have a jogging photo with fake background in this trip

      • Rnot says:

        Oh dear god. He’s the future head of state. NO ONE on his team is capable of threading the diplomatic needle in case of a win by either side. We already have Trump and the Heritage Foundation leading the “Team Red for William” brigade. Align Harry and Meghan in with Biden and Team Blue and you’re plunking the BRF into the most politically polarized US election since 1860. This is a million times more dangerous than wading into the Gaza situation. Either Charles or Rishi need to ORDER him to delay that trip until 2025.

    • Saucy&Sassy says:

      Mary Pester, let’s see if I’ve got this right. The UK media, and anyone else who wants to pile on, look down their noses at Americans, but they’re coming over to conquer us, huh? I can’t wait to find out where in the US gets this momentous moment. They are really insulting. They need to let go of the fantasy that the US is waiting for baited breath to see anyone from the brf. There might be some MAGAs who may want to see them, but that’s because they hate Meghan and not because they like anyone in the brf.

      I REALLY hope that wherever they go there are a LOT of tea leaves sitting around. Just a reminder to them.

      Wait! Is he coming to see 45?

      • Mary Pester says:

        @saucy&sassy, the t leaves, are telling me that they see waiting to see the scope (in other words how many celebrities reply) of all the interest, but they are finding it hard to make up their minds between New York and Washington!!, in advance I’m so sorry!!

  33. Beth says:

    Risible. Pass the sick bag.

  34. The Marchioness of Blorf says:

    His posture is awful in that pic on the cover and whoever wrote this bullshit must be three feet up Peg’s ass.

  35. ChattyCath says:

    Utter tripe or is it supposed to be funny?

    • blueberry says:

      As an American I have a hard time sussing out British sarcasm in written form. I don’t doubt though that he will believe it’s earnest praise!

  36. slippers4life says:

    Maybe the article isn’t an underhanded takedown, but I am wondering if the cover is one. I mean they purposely chose a photo where he looks like a constipated dictator from the Caribbean flop tour that was widely panned and not just any photo from the racist tour, but the one where they literally dressed like colonizers with their whole chests.

  37. QuiteContrary says:

    “He’s popular in America and understands that the Crown’s relationship to the Commonwealth must evolve.”

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. He’s a nonentity in America — so much so that President Biden granted him only a drive-by meeting — and he was handed notice by the Jamaican prime minister, so he has no choice but to let the crown’s relationship to the Commonwealth “evolve.”

  38. Izzy says:

    “a distinguished, gallant military career”

    What a colossal insult to Harry, who actually did serve and with distinction, and to everyone who has served in uniform (and not just cosplayed).

  39. Jaded says:

    “[He] understands that the Crown’s relationship to the Commonwealth must evolve.”

    As a Commonwealth member, I can happily report that 90% of Canadians couldn’t give a cold shit about him.

  40. Jill in IL says:

    Ye gods! It’s a good thing I’m on a clear liquid diet in preparation for my colonscopy tomorrow, because if I were eating anything solid, I think it would all be coming back up after reading this!! I shall have to be careful not to re-read this later tonight once the prep starts in earnest, lest things try to exit in the wrong direction!!

  41. maisie says:

    one of the worst examples of brown-nosing that I’ve seen in a long time, and I’ve seen some.

    William was overshadowed by the opening skit with Bark Ruffalo, the little dog, and when he made his entrance, NOBODY even applauded, let alone stood up.

    Watch the video, you can see Michael Sheen (a TRUE Prince of Wales) giving the side eye.

  42. SolarBeanbag says:

    “. . .his uniform HAT because it hides his Royal solar panel” I am LMAO over here–because truer words were never spoken! …”royal solar panel”

    🤣🤣🤣

    This was supposed to be under Mary Pester’s post.

  43. Shoegirl77 says:

    The choice of cover photo having the original background edited out of the cover, particularly this week is just chef’s kiss kinda perfection 🤣🤣

  44. Defender of Cats says:

    The picture of the him with Kate standing in the Land Rover while the locals were behind a fence was reminiscent of a colonial administrator from the good old days of Empire.

  45. AC says:

    Thanks for that summary @kaiser. I really wasn’t going to read their propaganda 😊.
    But it seems like they want to point more and more towards the narrative about Himself minus K.

  46. Linda Jones says:

    So true. Born in 1952 I grew up with the queen as my monarch, our head of state. After she died, I knew I no longer cared if Canada were to vote to become a republic. ♥️🇨🇦