Ashley Olsen with designer Marc Jacobs
Technically Ashley Olsen has been legal for a while. She turned 21 this summer, and if she had stayed in college instead of realizing that she was richer than sin and could have all the fun without the commitment of having to prove she learned stuff, she might be graduating now. I shudder to think of the crap I was up to at 21, but I’m married now with a toddler, and being in that situation makes you get nostalgic about near-constant hangovers punctuated by exams and random hookups. That was a long time ago for me, though, and I will probably never relive the chaos and stupidity of those years. Getting wasted and neglecting all responsibility does seem deceptively attractive compared to raising a three year old who screams his head off at the sight of bathwater. Maybe that’s what Whitney Bears is going through now.

Like Whitney, not everyone is willing to undertake the responsibilities that go along with the phase of life they’re supposed to be in. Hooking up with a hot young thing is often a way of reliving a youth that wasn’t that great the first time. Lance Armstrong is older than me at 36, but he still seems too old for Ashley Olsen. As a fit guy under 40, he’s not creepy-old for a 21 year-old, just in-denial old.

Both the NY Post and The Daily News are reporting that Lance and Ashley were all over each at a bar. This doesn’t make me go “ewww” so much as say “why?”

ODD couple alert: Ashley Olsen has a new, older man. The 21-year-old twin showed up to the Rose Bar at the Gramercy Park Hotel Monday night with Tory Burch’s ex, Lance Armstrong, 36. Our bar spy said, “They came together with a group of friends. Ashley drank red wine, sat on his lap and they were making out all night. They left together around 2 a.m.” Armstrong has been spending more time in town since he bought a home here. Another source said, “He tried to make Tory happy when they were dating by buying a place here, but she couldn’t deal with him not actually living in the same city, so they broke up.” Olsen’s rep didn’t return calls.

[From Page Six]

Lance was most recently dating some woman I’ve never heard of, fashion designer Tory Burch, who has an amazing six children and looks more Lance’s age and speed. He was also with singer Sheryl Crow for over two years following his divorce from the mother of his three children in September, 2003.

Ashley had a 30 year-old long-term boyfriend, Scott Sartiano, until recently, who was already too old for her.

Despite the questionable nature of this new relationship, I’m really glad to see this story today. I was looking for an excuse to publish these excellent pictures of Ashley Olsen’s Halloween costume. So go ahead and make out with guys who are nearly old enough to be your daddy, Ashley. As long as you can come up with inventive and non-slutty costumes like this, you get a pass.

Ashley Olsen is shown at a Halloween party with Marc Jacobs and his boyfriend. Pictures via ONTD.

Everyone’s favorite former meth addict, Jodie Sweetin, (aka Stephanie Tanner from “Full House”) got married in Las Vegas this past Saturday. According to Norm Clarke of the Las Vegas Review-Journal, Sweetin walked down the aisle for the second time at the famed Little Church of the West.

Jodie Sweetin, who played Stephanie in “Full House” during the sitcom’s eight-year run, got married Saturday at the Little Church of the West. Sweetin, who overcame a crystal meth addiction that cost her five teeth, married Cody Herpin, 30, of Los Angeles. Sweetin, 25, joins a long list of celebrities who married at the chapel, best known for the site of where Elvis and Ann Margret exchanged vows during the filming of “Viva Las Vegas.”

[From the Las Vegas Review-Journal]

Hopefully this marriage will work out better than her last one. Sweetin famously admitted to “Good Morning America” last year that she had developed a meth problem that cost her, (in addition to the five teeth) her marriage to her police officer husband. Sweetin claimed that after “Full House” ended, she felt a sense of loss and didn’t know what to do with herself. She tried to be normal by going to a regular high school and college, and ended up married at age 20. She quickly became bored with her life and wasn’t getting any acting jobs, and ended up experimenting with drugs and getting addicted to meth. Sweetin went on a major three-day bender, after which her friends and family (and former Full House costars including the Olsen twins, Bob Saget and John Stamos) staged an intervention. She then attended Promises (way before Britney and Lindsay made it trendy) for a six week treatment.

It seemed like she was doing a decent job of getting her act back together. Naively, at the time I wondered why she went on “Good Morning America” to announce her addiction when she’d fallen under the radar – it wasn’t like the paparazzi were stalking her or she’d gotten arrested by the cops. Then I realized it was a good story and got her back into the news, which is what she needed if she wanted to resurrect her acting career, as she claimed. Currently the gigs aren’t coming in droves, though she is the host of the prestigious “Pants off Dance off” where contestants strip down to their unmentionables while dancing to music. I smell an Emmy coming that show’s way! No wait, that’s not what I smell.

I remember seeing pictures from Jodie’s 2002 wedding, and it was the most traditional looking event I’d ever seen, complete with the poofiest veil worn since 1989. Candace Cameron was her maid of honor, and Candace’s daughter was her flower girl. It was one of those weddings that makes you think, “Hey, this girl won’t be shooting meth anytime soon.” But I guess that’s part of my naiveté. Let’s hope this works out better.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Jodie Sweetin is shown in the header image on 6/28 at a Pink Taco Restaurant opening in Century City, California. Thanks to WENN for this picture.

It used to be that fashion magazines counseled sternly and menacingly against wearing sandals or pumps with an ankle strap. “It interrupts the line of the leg!” “It creates instant cankles!” “It ruins a long, lean look!” To be perfectly honest, a fear of ankle straps threw its dark shadow onto my footwear shopping expeditions for several years.

Fast forward to 2006. Style “rules” are a little more lax than they once were (for example, “avoid anything worn in the 1980s” used to be a pretty firm one, but we all know what happened there), and the ankle strap appears to be making a comeback. A few wardrobe tips to keep in mind if you purchase a pair:

- This is a look best pulled off by those with slim calves. If yours are more robust, recall that no outfit has ever been ruined by a nice pump.

- A thin ankle strap is more forgiving than a thick one (only very tall and lanky Gisele Bundchen types should attempt an ankle “cuff”, as pictured here on Mischa Barton).

- More women can wear an open-toe shoe with an ankle strap (a la Beyoncé here) than a closed-toe one, so when it doubt, go for the shoe that lets you show off your pedicure.

- Do not wear opaque tights. Too many blocks of solid color; not enough “leg” feeling.

- Do not wear a skirt that hits lower than mid-thigh.

- Do not wear anything remotely frumpy as a top or jacket (ankle straps can quickly turn a conservative jacket into a horror of dowdiness).

To see several ankle strap “don’ts” in action at once, take a look at this shot of actress Marg Helgenberger at the premiere of Blood Diamond. Yep, that about sums it up.

There’s plenty of news of A C-Listers getting shut out of events this morning. Like Paris Hilton, The Olsen Twins were turned away at the door. Unlike Paris Hilton, they were invited to the party but simply failed to RSVP:

The party probably sucked anyway. The French aren’t known for their hospitality, and I’m speaking from personal experience here.

Maybe they weren’t let in because summer is barely over and Mary-Kate was wearing fur. Is it just me, or does Ashley look like she had some bad work done on her face?

Here they are at the Balenciaga Paris Launch in New York recently. [via]