Sometimes I really do wish that I could just write “NO COMMENT (on this whole mess)” and be done with it. Star Magazine has a completely hilarious story about Beyonce and Jay-Z and how they’re totally ready to try for a second baby. Because Blue Ivy is only three months old and Bey is really happy with how “easy” her pregnancy was, and how “easy” it was to lose the baby weight. Cough. Cough. Mutter. Cough. Something caught in my throat. Truly.

It’s been just three months since Blue Ivy was born, but Beyonce and Jay-Z are already trying for another little one!

“They see no reason to wait,” a source tells Star. “Beyonce has said giving birth and dropping the baby weight was far easier than she thought. Everyone in their circle is saying that another baby could be on the way before you know it.”

In fact, insiders say that’s the reason behind the couple’s recent romantic getaway to St. Barts. “It took them awhile to conceive Blue Ivy, so they don’t want to waste another second,” another source adds.

While the megastars long put music first, Blue Ivy has changed their priorities. “Beyonce and Jay-Z adore being parents, and they’re as hands-on as they possibly can be,” the source says. “Beyonce has found a passion other than music, and it’s being a mom.”

And since Beyonce’s career is on the back burner right now, “it’s in the best interests of both of them to have Beyonce pop out another one before she goes back out on tour,” continues the first source. “If she gets pregnant soon, they will be thrilled. She’ll just extend her break, and next year she’ll have the biggest comeback ever!”

[From Star Magazine, print edition]

So will Beyonce pull a Tori Spelling and get pregnant again two seconds after giving birth? Does Beyonce really have no huge career moves planned? No and no. There have already been legit media reports about Beyonce plotting her “comeback” – it involves a $150 million tour, new albums, filming a movie with Clint Eastwood, and much, much more. Now, I’m not saying that Beyonce can’t do all of that with a pillow firmly strapped on while pregnant. She’s already proven how much she can do while pregnant. Cough. But I’m just saying that it’s probably not going to happen right now.

Some photos of Beyonce and Blue earlier this week in NYC:

Photos courtesy of PCN, Fame/Flynet.

The last time I saw an interview with Kelly Preston, last year, I was honestly amazed at how brainwashed and out of it she sounded. You can watch that interview here. It was after her baby Ben was born, and her language was couched in Scientology speak that made no sense. She explained the concept of a “silent birth” in Scientology like this “L. Ron Hubbard found that the single source of abberation of psychosomatic illnesses, stress, fears, worry, things like that have to do with the reactive mind, and in that part of the mind is different words and commands that can come back to affect you later in your life.” I guess she meant that if you scream and talk loudly while giving birth, her cult believes that it can mess up your kid for life.

Well Kelly has a new interview on People magazine, and she said that she’s nursing her son and that it helps her bond with him. It’s sweet, and as a mom who nursed I can relate to what she’s saying. I’m actually relieved that she nursed little Ben and didn’t feed him barley water, as Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard recommended. Seriously, Hubbard thought that corn syrup and barley was better for babies than breast milk or formula, and he touted it to the detriment of many helpless babies born to parents who follow Scientology. Suri Cruise was even fed bottles of barley water, milk and corn syrup according to US Weekly. Here’s what Kelly said:

When the time comes, Kelly Preston admits weaning her 16-month-old son Benjamin won’t be easy — and not just for him.

“When I stop, it’s going to be really hard on me. I love nursing so much,” Preston, 49, tells PEOPLE.

“I love the closeness and knowing that I’m giving him the best as far as nutrients and antibodies. And he really loves it, too.”

Not yet on a schedule, Ben shares the bed with Preston and hubby John Travolta. She nurses him couple times a night and four or five times during the day.

“He’ll come up and point and go, ‘Mama, more,’” says Preston, laughing. “It’s so cute!”

Like his big sister Ella, 12, Ben has also developed an eclectic palate: he’s already a fan of filet mignon, scallops, salmon, organic veggies and, says his proud mom, “pretty much everything” — and is growing by leaps and bounds.

“New words are coming so fast,” says Preston, who recently partnered with non-profits Best for Babes and Healthy Child Healthy World to help educate moms about healthy living. “He loves ‘B’ words — basketball, bus, belly button, bird. He talks to birds and looks at them in the sky, and loves airplanes, busses, balls and lizards … and his favorite star is Elmo.”

Preston, who turns 50 in October, often swaps lifestyle and baby tips with her girlfriends, including fellow moms Jenna Elfman and Laila Ali, with whom she co-hosted an event Saturday at Elfman’s house to celebrate moms and educate them about raising kids in eco-friendly homes.

As it turned out, Preston was a little late to her own party. But who could blame her? As she told her guests, including mom-to-be Vanessa Lachey, she was busy nursing!

[From People]

I’m hoping that as a famous member of Scientology that Kelly will help other mothers in that cult realize that it’s ok to nurse their babies, which the World Health Organization recommends until age two and beyond.

In terms of that event at Jenna Elfman’s house, it was probably a gathering of Scientology moms, since Elfman is another famous member. They probably all hang out and do normal mom stuff, and it’s not necessarily related to Scientology. But if Vanessa Lachey was there I have to wonder – was it also a recruitment thing?

Also, I can’t believe Kelly is almost 50! There were rumors that she hired a surrogate for her baby, which were belied by beach photos of her looking like a new mom last year, along with this story that she’s nursing. It’s nice to hear a positive story about this family after the tragedy they suffered with the death of their 16 year-old son in early 2009.

Kelly Preston and John Travolta are shown at an event on 1-14-12. I wonder how they’re doing. They’re also shown out with baby Ben and their daughter Ella, 12, in June of last year. Credit: WENN.com and Pacific Coast News

For what it’s worth, In Touch Weekly scored an exclusive interview with Bristol Palin. They have Bristol’s reaction to her ex and baby daddy, Levi Johnston, fathering yet another child just three years after his first oops baby. Bristol of course says that Levi isn’t visiting their son, Tripp, while Levi has repeatedly claimed that Bristol and her mother are blocking his attempts to see the child. I think it’s probably true that the Palins tried to cut Levi out of Tripp’s life, and I think that Levi just gave up, stopped paying child support and stopped trying to see Tripp. That’s not how Bristol sees it, though. It was just a couple of years ago that she reunited with Levi and announced their re-engagement on the cover of US Weekly. Now he’s got a new girlfriend and a new baby on the way when he can’t be bothered to maintain contact with his first kid.

Here’s what Bristol told In Touch:

Her reaction to hearing that Levi’s girlfriend is pregnant
“I said, ‘No Way, shut up!’”

On her feelings about it
“I think it’s a little bit of everything and a lot of confusion. I’m upset about it.”

On Levi’s parenting
“He’s seen Tripp twice in the past four months. He once went an entire year without seeing him at all.

“I wish Levi would be like, ‘Hey Bristol, can I have Tripp for the weekend? I would be so willing and glad to do that. He continues to lie.”

On Tripp’s relationship with his dad
“Levi is a stranger to Tripp. He doesn’t understand that Levi is his dad.

“I don’t want him to go to elementary school with 10 half-siblings. That would really affect him.”

On Levi’s new kid
“I hope that this child is raised with two parents. He needs to step up to the plate and be there. I thought he had learned his lesson the first time.”

[From In Touch, print edition, April 23, 2012]

Well I hope that Bristol is telling the truth and that she’s making sure Levi has access to Tripp. As we mentioned yesterday, Levi and his newish pregnant girlfriend, Sunny Oglesby, went on The Insider to explain her pregnancy. Levi’s quote on how he knocked up another one is priceless so I’ll repeat it again “There was a time we went to the cabin and forgot the birth control pills and, you know, about a month later we found out we were having a baby.” Uh derp. In that interview, Sunny defended Levi as a dad, so I’m hoping she’ll be instrumental in making sure he visits Tripp. Maybe Levi will realize what he’s missing out in his oldest kid’s life once he has another baby. Or not. He’s not the brightest or the most responsible.

US Weekly from July, 2010:

Bristol is shown signing copies of her book on 2-11-12, credit: FameFlynet and on 8-18-11 Credit: Fallen Star, PCNPhotos. Levi is shown on 9-21-11. Credit: Enrique Carrillo, PCNPhotos

It was about a year and a half ago that country star Carrie Underwood, 29, very clearly said that she wasn’t planning for a baby with her husband, hockey star Mike Fisher. (I always want to call him Mike Comrie, but that’s Hilary Duff’s hockey playing husband!) She said back then that “We just want to be together and keep it as simple as possible. And I think a baby would just make things so complicated right now.” (She also said that should doesn’t do Twitter, but she’s since joined up.) Well Carrie is still sticking with her sentiment about babies at least. She just told E! News that both she and her husband are so busy that they couldn’t be responsible for a child. She also called her dogs her babies, and then got embarrassed and corrected herself. It was cute! She explained that it’s easy to leave her pups at the doggie day care for a couple of days when she needs to go out of town. Here’s E!’s story and you can see the video interview with Carrie on their site.

It’s been almost two years since Carrie Underwood and Mike Fisher got hitched, and sorry, but with a good-looking couple like that—we want to see some babies! (Is it so wrong of us to try to dictate how celebs live their lives?)

So is it time for some little humans?

Nope, not yet.

The country-singin’ diva hung out with E! News and told us, “We’re both so busy and it would be weird to have that much—you know, there’s another person depending on you.”

But even though the duo aren’t planning to expand their family just yet, they definitely seem to have nailed the married life. And according to Underwood, part of the secret is to give each other some time apart.

“It’s so nice to miss him, and it’s so nice to be happy every time I see him. And, you know, we really cherish the time we have together.”

[From E! Online, with video at the source]

I really like it when celebrities admit that they’re not ready for or planning on kids for whatever reason. Zooey Deschanel did that recently and I found it so mature and thoughtful on her part. It’s in no way more or less admirable than having kids, I don’t mean to suggest that. It just seems brave to admit being childless by choice. Society pressures women to have kids and when celebrities say that they’re not ready or willing to it helps to take some of the stigma off.

So I guess we can assume all those tabloid stories about Carrie preparing for a baby were bullsh*t. Hopefully her husband is on the same page as she is when it comes to not having kids.

Here are photos of Carrie and Mike on their honeymoon in Tahiti in July, 2010. He’s hot! She’s also shown at the ACM Awards on 4-1-12. Credit: FameFlynet, Inc

Yesterday, Hilary Duff tweeted the first photos of her two-week-old baby boy Luca Cruz Comrie. Hilary gave birth March 20, and she’s already been pap’d a few times (solo) since the birth. I’m including some photos of Hilary out and about in LA just days after Luca came into the world – she was even wearing heels! Crazy. Anyway, Luca Cruz is a little cutie:

I like when parents wait a few weeks to do the baby photos, mostly because all newborns look alike, especially when they’re fresh out of the womb, you know? That being said, it’s kind of funny (to me) how Hilary could barely wait two whole weeks to show off photos. I wonder if she got offers to sell the first photos? Honestly, I would imagine that she did get some low-ball offers from People and Us Weekly, judging solely from how hard she pimped her pregnancy. There was interest in her pregnancy, and there’s interest in the baby. Because motherhood sells, but for Hilary, I would imagine it would sell for less than $100K. So she just decided to give the photos away for free. Thoughts on her choice? I kind of like it. Mostly I just like the fact that we (and every other outlet) can use the free photos.

So… get used to this. Hilary will be tweeting photos of Luca nonstop from here on out.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and Hilary’s Twitter.

Emma Heming’s pregnancy seemed to go by very quickly. Maybe that was because we barely saw her, and because Bruce Willis’s ex-wife was the one getting all of the attention for the past six months. Last October, Emma and Bruce announced that they were expecting their first child together, and now Emma has given birth… to a girl! Bruce and his girls… that man will never get a son, will he? Newborn daughter Mabel Ray Willis was welcomed into this world yesterday in LA. Everybody sounds happy and healthy:

Bruce Willis and his wife Emma Hemming welcomed a baby girl, Mabel Ray Willis, Sunday in Los Angeles, Willis’s rep confirms to PEOPLE.

The Die Hard actor and Hemming, a designer-model, “are overjoyed about the newest member of their family. Both mother and baby are healthy and doing beautifully,” says the rep.

Weighing 9 lbs., 1 oz., Mabel Ray is the first child for the couple, who have been married for three years.

Willis has three other daughters, Rumer, Scout, and Tallulah, with his ex-wife, Demi Moore.

[From People]

Bruce just turned 57. Emma is 33 years old. Bruce’s oldest child is Rumer, at 23 years old (Scout is 21, Tallulah is 18). My guess is that Emma and Bruce are just going to have the one kid together, but I always forget how young Emma is. She might get pregnant again, you never know. Bruce might have another chance for a son. What I kind of love about Bruce, though, is that he seems happy to be a father of all girls. By all accounts, he’s a doting and stable father.

Anyway, congrats to Emma, Bruce and baby Mabel Ray. In case you’re wondering, Chad Lowe and Dermot Mulroney also have daughters named Mabel. So it’s something of a trend in Hollywood. It’s such an old-fashioned name! What’s next? “Ethel”? Maple Bacon?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Before Octomom Nadya Suleman got pregnant for the sixth time, having 12 embryos implanted at once (she claimed it was 6 that split, but it came out in hearings with the medical board that her fertility doctor, who lost his license, implanted 12), she was on disability and living with her parents. She was also collecting social security disability for two of her children as well as food stamps, but repeatedly claimed she was not on “welfare,” which may have been technically accurate but still sounded ridiculous. Suleman declared bankruptcy in 2008, around the time of her pregnancy, and her parents declared bankruptcy and saw their home go into foreclosure as well. Now the home that Suleman bought two years ago for $594,000 is predictably in foreclosure as she can’t be bothered to pay her rent. All the nude and bikini photoshoots, celebrity boxing, dating show appearances, staged photo ops and interviews just aren’t helping her make ends meet. She’s now on food stamps of $2,000 a month for her children. TMZ has an explanation of how she qualified for food stamps, it’s because she has 14 kids and makes under $119,000 a year, or $8,000 per person. She surely knew this before she got pregnant this last time, having used government resources for her six children for years.

TMZ also has an interview with Octo, which you can see here, in which she defends herself. I want to hear Suze Ormon say “I told you so, you stupid cow.” Here’s some of what she said, and of course it’s our fault for calling her on it after she made a spectacle of herself:

“I’m so so sick and tired of people making our business their business, and if someone has a problem with me trying to feed my kids temporarily with some help until we get on our feet.

“I think people… should be focusing on those who take advantage of the system, not those who desperately want to use it temporarily until we get on our feet.

“Hopefully we won’t be on it for more than a month or two…

“For three years I’ve been trying zero help, no food stamps nothing, I’ve been working my butt off and if [someone has] a problem with us doing anything to get some help temporarily, it’s exactly that, their problem not ours.”

Here’s a link to a story with examples of some of the stuff Suleman spends her money on, including acrylic nails and mani-pedis, multiple plastic surgery procedures and Botox, private schooling for her children, MAC cosmetics and video games. Of course people who need food stamps should get on it for their families, many people could not afford to eat without it, but this woman is a textbook example of someone gaming the system.

Update: As many of you have pointed out, her kids should not have to suffer any more than they already have. At least with food stamps she’ll be forced to spend the money on food alone.

Some photos credit: Fame and Pacific Coast News

Video is below

Like the Octomom story, Kaiser, Bedhead and I all had a little e-mail conference yesterday in which we agreed to skip this story for a while. Now that it’s even bigger news this morning, we’re giving in and covering it. So you’ve undoubtedly heard that actress Alicia Silverstone posted video in which she chews up food and feeds it to her baby, Bear Blu, now ten months old, from her own mouth. Alicia wrote that Bear was a month or two younger when she filmed that video and that now he will crawl across the room expecting to eat from her mouth whenever he sees that she’s eating. It’s controversial to say the least. Alicia put out a vegan cookbook in 2009 called The Kind Diet. This may be a natural parenting thing, but this is the first I’m hearing of it.

Is Alicia Silverstone getting her parenting tips from birds?

The actress’ 10-month-old son, Bear Blu, is already eating solids — as long as they’ve been pre-chewed. In the latest video posted on Silverstone’s website, the 35-year-old feeds her baby by chewing up his food and feeding it to him mouth-to-mouth.

“I just had a delicious breakfast of miso soup, collards and radish steamed and drizzled with flax oil, cast iron mochi with nori wrapped outside, and some grated daikon. Yum!” she wrote on The Kind Life, the website for her vegan cookbook, “The Kind Diet.”

The “Clueless” star explained, “I fed Bear the mochi and a tiny bit of veggies from the soup … from my mouth to his. It’s his favorite … and mine. He literally crawls across the room to attack my mouth if I’m eating. This video was taken about a month or 2 ago when he was a bit wobbly. Now he is grabbing my mouth to get the food!”

“Pre-chewing” is actually a thing, but it’s very uncommon in the US and other Western nations and not recommended by health care professionals, as it can pass infection and disease from parent to child.

Dr. Jennifer Landa, who dedicates her practice to bioidentical hormone therapy, customized nutrition and fitness programs, told Fox News:

“There are those who think that a mom chewing a baby’s food provides helpful enzymes from her mouth but it doesn’t seem like a hygienic practice. Various viruses and bacteria, but especially herpes virus, may be passed from mother to baby. These microbes present a challenge that the infant’s immune system may not be ready for.”

[From The Huffington Post]

Some people are saying this is shocking and not at all hygienic. Others are saying that this is how mothers fed their babies for thousands of years (we haven’t been around for millions yet) and that it’s natural and safe. This is why I quoted this story from Huffpo, because it seems to have a good balance of both perspectives. My reaction is more of puzzlement. I’ve read comments in which people say they’ve chewed up food for their babies, and maybe I’m naive or not creative but this never occurred to me and I’ve never seen other moms do it. I just fed my baby soft food. Plus there are blenders, food processors and gadgets specifically for making baby food. So it seems unnecessary and kind of risky. Alicia is putting this out there, though, so she wants us to talk about it. To each their own I guess. As long as her kid is happy and healthy.

Here are some new photos of Beyonce and Blue Ivy. You can’t even see baby Blue, though. Bey keeps Blue’s face well-hidden for public outings, I’ll give her that. Some sites are describing Beyonce’s ensemble as “grey”. PLEASE. That’s a shade of blue-grey. Which is still a shade of blue. Which still goes with the whole ALL BLUE thing. Except for Beyonce’s shoes, obviously.

Meanwhile, all of Beyonce’s friends and associates are still being sent out on a weekly basis to discuss baby Blue to the media, and to describe how Beyonce is obviously a wonderful and natural mother. Bey very well may be a natural and wonderful mother – but I dislike being told about her mothering skills every other day. It reeks of a concentrated PR campaign: “Mission: Beyonce’s Motherhood!” In a recent interview, one of Jay-Z’s employees talked about the baby and Beyonce:

Blue’s a chip off the old block! With the recent early burst of warm spring weather in NYC, Beyonce has been spotted out and about frequently with daughter Blue Ivy Carter, 2 months. But the instantly famous baby’s actual face hasn’t been seen since her mom, 30, and dad Jay-Z shared intimate family pics of their newborn with the world on Feb. 10.

So who does little Blue look like lately? According Grammy-winning singer Melanie Fiona — Jay-Z, 43, is her co-manager — it’s her papa!

“Beyonce says Blue changes every day and looks just like Jay now,” Toronto native Fiona, 28, recently told Us Weekly.

The R&B singer (her album The MF Life drops March 20) adds that fatherhood has her pal Jay (real name: Shawn Carter) completely blissed out.

“He’s in a good mood all the time!” she says.

And mama Beyonce, 30, is just as ecstatic. “She just is so happy. I’ve seen Bey like 3 times since she’s had the baby,” Fiona explains. “And she’s just glowing and she’s saying [motherhood] is the best, and she just loves it!”

[From Us Weekly]

Sure. Whatever. I’m too tired to really get into it. I give up. Beyonce is the best mother ever and she surely gave birth to Blue and her body bounced back instantly and if you think differently, you are just a crazy conspiracy theorist. I GIVE UP.

Oh, and everyone is saying that the fluffy blue-grey stuff is actually the “fur baby carrier”. I think it looks like faux fur, right? And I’m still not sure that the faux fur stuff isn’t part of the sweater…?

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

Here are the first photos of Charlize Theron and her baby, Jackson. Except you can’t really see Jackson at all. According to Fame/Flynet, Charlize stopped by the post office to order a passport for Jackson, and she “kept her son under wraps the whole time, in a blanket covered carrier as she went in and out of the post office.” So he might not even be in there. If this was Beyonce we were talking about, I would say the “empty carrier” theory was a solid possibility, but in Charlize’s case, I think Jackson is actually in there. He’s already a little star, blanketed in stars, carried by a star. Sidenote: I wouldn’t mind having that blanket in a larger size! That’s really cute.

I’m thinking that Charlize needs a passport for Jackson because he’s coming on mama’s summer publicity tours for Prometheus and Snow White and the Huntsman. Prometheus comes out June 1st in Europe and June 8th in America. SWATH comes out on June 1st pretty much everywhere. So Charlize is going to be really, really busy throughout May and the first half of June, and Jackson will have to come everywhere with her. A friend of Charlize‘s tells Us Weekly, “Jackson will go wherever she goes. Charlize will be a full-time mom!” So… my guess is that we’ll actually see little Jackson’s face in time for Charlize’s dual press tours, right? Maybe a week or two before, mid-May? Nice baby photos in a candid photo shoot with a friendly paparazzo. Us Weekly or People Magazine will get the exclusive shots first, maybe.

Just for the hell of it (and because I can’t help myself), let’s watch the Prometheus trailer again. Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.