I think singer/songwriter Ne-Yo has been drinking antifreeze instead of letting it leak out of the bottom of his car. Because that’s the only possible – rational – explanation I can come up with for why in the world he would say that Lindsay Lohan’s upcoming album sounds like anything other than shit. Well antifreeze ingestion or financial gain. Ne-Yo, who has written hit songs for Usher, Chris Brown, Whitney Houston, and Britney Spears (and about two dozen more successful pop singers) somehow got talked into writing a few tunes for Lindsay Lohan. And apparently the hit maker thinks it came out well.

Ne-Yo admits he had his doubts about Lindsay Lohan’s vocal talents when he was asked to write a song for her upcoming third album, due later this year. “I gotta admit, we were like … ‘Lindsay Lohan?’” Ne-Yo tells Billboard magazine. “I mean, I’ve written for Beyonce Knowles, Mary J. Blige, Rihanna, Celine Dion and … Lindsay Lohan?”

But after hearing her sing on the track, called “Bossy,” Ne-Yo says he and producer Stargate were so impressed that he called Lohan to say how sorry he was for not believing in her. “She did a ridiculously fabulous job,” Ne-Yo tells the magazine. “I was so shocked I had to call her and apologize for what I was thinking because she did so good. I think the world is gonna be surprised.”

Earlier this month Ne-Yo told PEOPLE that he and Stargate approached the Lohan project “as a challenge. ‘Can we make a song for Lindsay Lohan that people were gonna take seriously?’ I think we did it,” he said.

[From People]

Mark it down: Today Ne-Yo’s credibility (and career) just jumped the shark. LiLo’s first album actually wasn’t the worst thing ever. It was semi-decent pop, if you’re into that kind of music. It wasn’t some Paris Hilton/Nicole Richie crap where it was cringe-worthy awful. But from the leaked version of Lindsay’s upcoming single “Bossy,” there’s nothing “ridiculously fabulous” about it. If I were a well-respected songwriter, I wouldn’t want my name attached to anything having to do with Lindsay Lohan, unless it’s the phrase “totally shot her down.”

I love when good ‘ol Mom and Pop Lohan start bashing each other, because it’s guaranteed to be an orgy of hypocrisy. And who doesn’t relish that? The funkier looking Lohan’s (that’s Dina… it took me a while to decide who was funkier looking, but Dina’s mouth takes the cake) ass-tastic show Living Lohan premiered on E! last night.

And just because they like to stir the shit, OK Magazine thought it would be kind to give Michael Lohan a screener and ask for his thoughts. Now we know Michael is usually pretty reticent about judging and telling people how to live, since he’s an out and proud born-again Christian. But he made an exception for OK, and shared a few restrained opinions in an email with them.

Soooooo, you want a comment on the first episode of Living Lohan? Well, let’s see… If I were to look at things from a wordly perspective, I would probably have a lot to say about exploitation, hypocrisy and even deception — and maybe at a later date, I might just do so. For now, let’s just say I’m still trying to figure out if this show is about managing Ali’s career and being a “real” mother, or reading tabloids.

I’ve had a sneak peek at some future episodes and I will say that some of the people Dina surrounds the kids with still concerns me — again, I can address that when they appear on the show. I just hope Dina takes the high road — like a Lohan would — and rights these wrongs.

If this show is about the being a mother and a manager, the most important thing is to set a good example by instilling positive values, and doing what’s right for the kid’s sake. Not for our own! I wish Ali, Cody and Dina the best on the show and pray that they get what they want out of it.

[From OK Magazine]

I love all the “you suck, you’re terrible, you’re doing the wrong thing,” blah blah blahness, followed by, “I hope it makes you happy!” Because I’m totally sure Michael really does. Ending an otherwise critical email with a bland, generic catchall positive quote doesn’t exactly negate the other seven (really long) sentences.

Dina’s been out doing a ton of hypocritical press, so Michael’s thoughts on her aren’t exactly novel. If nothing else, Living Lohan is a great way to make sure that Dina never regains a shred of dignity or credibility, and ensures that her younger kids will never have successful careers of their own. But hey, Lindsay is doing so well, I’m sure they can all just live off her. Michael included, of course.

Micheal Lohan is shown on 3/6/08 “leaving the Lindsay Lohan Photo Exhibition inspired by her tattoos” thanks to WENN.

Lindsay Lohan is turning 22 on July 2nd, and it seems she hasn’t got enough cash to throw a party. So, she’s asking for some sponsorship for the drugs and booze she’s planning on indulging in. Lindsay’s people have set up a website detailing just what the birthday girl has planned. They’re calling it ‘Lindsay Lohan’s Mo-Rockin’ 22nd Birthday’.

“Sponsors will have a unique branding opportunity to an internationally media worthy event. Lindsay and her 10 closes girlfriends will start the celebration in the early afternoon with spa treatments including manicures, facials and massages.

“Upon nightfall an intimate group of 75 VIP guests will gather for dinner, performances and most importantly to help Lindsay blow out the candles on her 22nd Birthday cake.”

Talent Resources

If you do sponsor Lindsay’s 22nd, you’ll get logos on the invite and signage at the venue (a private Malibu mansion). You’ll also get inclusion in the gift bags, inclusion in the media materials, and your product will be placed in a ‘hospitality suite’.

The site also has a link to coverage of Lindsay’s 20th birthday party in Life & Style Magazine. They don’t provide links to pictures of Lindsay stumbling out of clubs, or her mug shot.

I don’t understand why Lindsay Lohan, who has been treated at three different rehab facilities this year, would ask for sponsorship of a party. Particularly when she blew off her 21st birthday party in favor of some time at Promises Rehab facility. If she winds up in rehab again, will the sponsors get their money back? Can’t she do what regular people do - and quite a few celebrities - and just throw her own private party, and pay for it herself?

Lindsay’s movie career is not exactly flourishing (she has one movie this year lined up, and one for 2009) maybe she should just try and lay low for a while, and concentrate on her acting. Otherwise she’s going to wind up begging her mum for some screen time on her reality series.

According to TMZ no alcohol brands will be sponsoring the event. This doesn’t mean that alcohol won’t be served.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Lohan is shown out shopping with her girlfriend on 5/16/08 and shopping in Beverly Hills on 5/15/08, thanks to WENN. Those boots!

Those rumors about Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson being lovers just won’t go away. The pair have been friends for several years, and gossip about the two of them has been around for almost as long. Dina and Ali Lohan just gave an interview to Extra, in which they’re asked about Lindsay’s lady-loving proclivities.

White Oprah and her 35-year-old daughter, Ali Lohan, are making the rounds whoring out their new reality show. Extra asked Ali and White Oprah about the rumors that HoHan is bumping vagina lips with Samantha Ronson.

Ali said, “They’re best friends. They’re just friends. It’s pathetic what people say.” Lezzzz be friends. Best friends with benefits! Friends who happen to eat each other’s coochie cats. You get the picture.

White Oprah responded, “It’s so silly. We actually laugh about it now. It really hurts, but you develop a thick skin. You have to ignore it.” A thick skin thanks to layers and layers of fake tanning grease!

Denials! You can’t deny the heat between Ronson and HoHan. That’s from some weird STD, but there’s still heat between them!

[From Dlisted]

That’s obviously not exactly the official transcript, but Michael K does a much better job summing it up than any line-by-line interview ever could. At one point the Extra interviewer asks Dina about her relationship with ex-husband Michael Lohan, and Dina’s publicist is heard trying to cut the interview. Dina is actually remarkably gracious (at least in comparison) and says she doesn’t want to talk about him. Here’s a clip of the interview, thanks to RedLasso.

Poor Lindsay Lohan. It must really suck to have karma bite you on the ass. La Lohan has been acting like a drunken spoiled brat for the last several years, and it’s finally getting the best of her. She hasn’t had a successful decent movie since Mean Girls, and hasn’t gotten any press for doing anything good since about that time. You never hear anyone say, “Lindsay Lohan did such a nice _______.” You do hear them say, “Lindsay Lohan ran over a guy’s foot,” and “Lindsay Lohan stole a random girl’s $11,000 fur coat.” I’m pretty sure next week you’ll hear, “Lindsay Lohan went to Disneyland and kicked Donald Duck in the crotch, just to see him cry.”

Lohan’s reputation as a poor actress with an even poorer work ethic has finally caught up with her. She’s been un-attached from the Charles Manson film she was scheduled to shoot – all because no one wanted to work with her – even no-name celebs.

Lohan has been un-attached from the independent feature The Manson Girls, written and to be directed by Matthew Bright, and produced by Elie Samaha, Donald Kushner, and Brad Wyman through Junction Films. Production was slated to commence in early July for five weeks in Los Angeles, and everybody was pleased that Lohan was attached back in March. (Some may, or may not, view this true life crime film for her as hitting bottom. Lindsay was to play the part of Nancy Pitman, a pampered surfer girl who became enthralled with Charlie Manson.)

But people associated with the movie told agents that Lohan quickly became more of a deficit than an asset when they discovered that they couldn’t find any name actresses who wanted to co-star with her. (And even some name actors…) So now Lindsay is off the pic — but not for the excuses being circulated. Let this be a lesson… Behaving badly may get you on the covers of celebrity-obsessed mags and tabloids. But Hollywood won’t tolerate your shit and shouldn’t.

[From Deadline Hollywood Daily]

Rush & Molloy also mentioned that after she was dropped from the film, Lohan was spotted downing tequila shots with Lauren Conrad. Getting publicly plastered with a “reality” T.V. star? I’m not sure who should be more embarrassed to be seen with who here. You’d think reality TV actresses would be the lowest on the Hollywood food chain… but I’m pretty sure that Lohan is forevermore at the bottom of any list anyone could make.

Here’s Lohan leaving a meeting with the producers of a new film ‘Labor Pains’ in Los Angeles yesterday. Wonder how long before they “un-attach” her from their film. Images thanks to WENN.

From what I remember, Lindsay Lohan’s last music efforts were pretty solid pop numbers. I listened to a few on YouTube and they’re not bad at all. She must have a bad producer now, because E! Online and other sources have what they claim to be her latest single, Bossy, and it’s awful. It’s that electro-pop crap that leaves a bad taste in your mouth and the lyrics are so lame and repetitive. Paris Hilton’s music is better. Maybe they’re going for the tween set, because it’s the kind of crap that kids can tolerate.

Lohan is still being hired for film roles so she won’t have to fall back on her music “career” yet. She’s set to play a woman who fakes a pregnancy for attention:

Troubled star LINDSAY LOHAN will fake a pregnancy for her next movie role.
The actress - who is currently filming a guest appearance on hit U.S. TV show Ugly Betty - will appear in Rick Schwartz comedy Labor Pains.

A source tells the New York Post’s PageSix.com, “When she’s (Lohan’s character) treated better by everyone in her life, she tries to keep up the lie for nine months.”

[From ContactMusic]

Lindsay can certainly relate to faking things to get attention.

She is shown out getting food yesterday, thanks to WENN.

Lindsay Lohan was supposedly the model of a well-prepared actress on the set of ABC’s “Ugly Betty,” according to sources. Instead of reverting to her diva days of ditching rehearsals and blowing off shoots, Blohan actually reported to the set of the TV show early, and ready to work. That’s probably because this guest star gig the only decent acting work she can get, besides and unnamed movie co-starring Jack Black about dueling Renaissance Faire employees.

Gone are the days of being late to the set!

Lindsay Lohan – who began shooting her spot on ABC’s Ugly Betty on Saturday - continues to earn rave reviews from the show’s cast and crew.

“She was terrific - a pleasure,” Ugly Betty creator Silvio Horta tells Usmagazine.com. “She came in early and was very pleasant.”

Lohan plays Kimberly, “a queen bee girl who Betty went to high school with,” Horta says.

Lohan first appears on the May 22 season finale “in a flashback” dodge ball game, Horta says.

“Kimberly is doing the picking,” Horta says, “and it doesn’t turn out well for Betty.”

(She’s one of the last to be picked!)

Horta says Lohan will return for five episodes next season.

“They’re going to run into each other,” he says of the two characters. “Kimberly’s life has taken a turn for the worst.”

[From Us Weekly]

Hmmm. A character who was once super popular, but not a very nice person, who has fallen on some hard times- not too much of a stretch for our young rehab vet, is it? I’m sure Blohan is hoping that this guest stint will do for her career what Britney Spears’ appearance on “How I Met Your Mother” did. Trouble is, there is a lot more animosity and a lot less sympathy for Blohan’s self induced career tank than for Britney’s. And besides, does anyone even watch “Ugly Betty” anymore?

Lindsay Lohan is shown at the Launch of the Scarlet HD TV Series on 4/28/08, thanks to PRPhotos.

Have you noticed that there are much fewer stories about Lindsay Lohan lately? A story in People made it abundantly clear that she’s completely fallen off the wagon. While the gossip magazines and sites covered it, it was barely a blip on our radar. She’s living with a woman and we covered a story that she yelled at Ashley Oslen for trying to talk to her girlfriend, saying “Get your 15-year-old Full House ass away from my girlfriend,” but it only got 7 comments. It’s not like anyone really cares about her at this point. Good for her for staying in a relatively long term relationship even if she’s insanely jealous and drinking again.

The stars of faux reality show “The Hills” get more press coverage than Lohan, and that’s really saying something. Over the weekend there was a story that she drink Shirley Temples and seemed to abstain from alcohol while at a gig her girlfriend, DJ Samantha Ronson, played in Las Vegas on Friday, but with Lohan you never can tell if she’s sneaking vodka into her drinks. Nor does anyone particularly seem to care.

Here she is at the Launch of the Scarlet HD TV Series yesterday, looking rough and awkward in that dress. Also shown are Heidi Montag and Spencer Prat, Emmy Rossum, Kristin Cavallari, Lauren Conrad, Tila Tequila, Vanessa Marcil, Bai Ling, and Travis Barker. Thanks to PRPhotos.

Christina Ricci has an opinion on Lindsay Lohan – don’t we all? – but for once it has to do with her acting roles and not her private life. Ricci says that Lohan somehow glamorized stripper roles in films, and that’s stupid.

Ricci claims stars like Lohan, who peeled off in 2007 movie I Know Who Killed Me, have created a culture of women who find flattery in misogyny.

She says, “It used to be something that we (women) were sort of ashamed of. You didn’t want to admit to people that you were a stripper.

“But now, the hottest thing to say is, ‘I can work a pole!’ Who gives a f**k? But it’s a huge weird thing.

“I mean, you see actresses, and their passion project is to play a stripper. It’s just stupid.”

Contact Music

A few years ago women were changing their attractive appearances to win Oscars. Remember Nicole Kidman’s nose in ‘The Hours’, Charlize Theron in ‘Monster’? Christina Ricci is currently doing it in ‘Penelope’ by wearing a pig’s nose on her otherwise flawless face.

There’s a little article this week in the Sydney Morning Herald about the volume of men now going full frontal in film, and how women don’t seem to react in quite the same way as men.

The 28-year-old comedian (Jason Segal, in Forgetting Sarah Marshall)is presented in full-frontal glory during a break-up scene that involves Segel naked, dripping wet and sobbing like a baby. No clever Austin Powers-style genital obfuscation with props. No artful lighting to preserve any mystery. And the camera cuts away from close-ups of his teary face (he’s being dumped by his girlfriend, the titular Sarah, played by Kristen Bell) to wider, phallus-inclusive shots three times.

At the South by Southwest festival, Segel almost brought the house down with laughter every time he was shown au naturel.

Segel wrote the film’s script, basing the scene on a real-life naked break-up of his own. The actor-writer contemplated inequalities between male and female film nudity before putting himself on display.

“When a woman does nudity in a movie, men immediately switch into a sexual mode,” he says. “For women, from what I understand, it’s not like that. They see a naked, out-of-shape man crying and it’s funny - something weird, disturbing and disgusting we can all laugh at.”

Maybe it is the increase in male nudity that is encouraging women to do more confronting nude scenes as strippers. Or maybe it’s just a result of the pole dancing work out craze, why bother to develop a skill if you can’t use it at work?

I tried the whole pole dance work out phenomenon. You really have to be very coordinated not to injure yourself. I think I gained 5 pounds waiting for my arms to stop hurting.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Christina Ricci and the cast of “Speedracer” are shown at the Grand Prix on 4/19/08, thanks to PRPhotos. Susan Sarandon looks great! Also shown are Matthew Fox, Emile Hirsch, John Goodman, and racers Gerardo Bonila and Ben Devlin.

Despite her public claims that she and BFF Samantha Ronson are just really great friends, Lindsay Lohan sure is acting like her girlfriend. Or maybe even her wife. Yesterday we told you how Lindsay gave up pretending to be sober while partying at the Hawaiian Tropic Zone on Saturday night. According to the New York Post, Lindsay – being Lindsay – made sure to add a hell of a lot more drama to the night.

Lindsay Lohan gets feisty when it comes to gal pal Sam Ronson. The two spent the weekend partying at the Beatrice Inn on Friday and Hawaiian Tropic Zone on Saturday, where Ronson was spinning, but Lohan didn’t like all the attention Ronson was getting. “Ashley Olsen said hello to Sam at the Beatrice, and Lindsay screamed at her, ‘Get your 15-year-old ‘Full House’ a - - away from my girlfriend,’ ” said our spy. Saturday, Lohan said Ronson “was ignoring her” and became upset. “Samantha was really focused on her work and didn’t leave the booth for anything,” said our spy. Lindsay is so into her pal, she’s even created a Facebook profile under “Lindsay Ronson.”

[From the New York Post]

Ashley Olsen doesn’t exactly seem like she’d pose a threat to whatever relationship Lohan and Ronson have going on. And by most accounts she’s a well-behaved woman who seems to have her act together and runs a successful business. I doubt she’s used to being spoken to that way. It just shows how classless Lindsay Lohan is… in case that wasn’t already clear.

Both the New York Post, Gawker, and Radar all have stories on Lindsay’s Facebook page under “Lindsay Ronson.” That’s quite the commitment to a friendship right there – e-changing your last name. All three seem to think the profile is real, due to the legit famous friends she has.

Our favorite cocaine-dappled redhead, actress Lindsay Lohan, has a Facebook profile! But it’s undercover… She goes by the name “Lindsay Ronson,” using the last name of her friend (girlfriend perhaps??), DJ Samantha Ronson. She’s friends with Marc Jacobs, his ex-fiancé (and former hooker) Jason Preston, The Hills’ Lauren Conrad, model Jessica Stam, random internet socialite Cory Kennedy, and a whole host of other notable idiots. It’s funny to see that all these loathsome people are connected, though I guess it makes some perfect cosmic sense in a way. Though maybe they don’t all get along. She’s friends with a “Hillary Duff” (a notorious enemy) and, judging by her “Wall,” she and model Lauren Hastings seem to be in some sort of fight. Also, as you can see from her “Status,” she’s totes serious about her new sober living (”It was 430 am!!!” she offers as cryptic explanation for something), even though she’s been seen hard partying all over the place.

[From Gawker]

The Lindsay “Ronson” profile is back to private on Facebook… I’m guessing she got a lot of attention for it. There’s some screen captures below. I think it looks pretty legit. All I can say is, that Lindsay Lohan is one crazy girlfriend. Can you imagine what would happen if you were dating a guy, and made his last name yours on your Facebook page? There would be major hell to pay.

Here are the screen caps of Lindsay’s Facebook page. Header of Lindsay and Samantha are shown hanging out outside the DCMA store on April 11th. Images thanks to WENN.