One of Pete Doherty’s long suffering cats died after being hit by a car and he decided to give it a burial at sea. Except he put it in his pond and the poor thing floated to the top and froze there. I’m not sure if this was the same cat he made a little kitty crack pipe for, but how he kept a cat after that video got out is beyond my comprehension. Where is PETA when you need them?

Pete Doherty has revealed that he buried one of his cats in his pond - but to the Babyshambles man’s horror, the animal remained on the water’s surface until it froze. “The cat got run over so I thought I’d give it a burial at sea - well, the pond,” he said. “But it didn’t sink, it floated and then froze over. So there was this dead cat under the ice looking up at me. It was terrible”

NME

PETA, it’s time to stage a protest at Pete Doherty’s place. In the past he’s housed himself in a coffin for Halloween with rats, wanted to turn his dead cat into a diamond for Kate Moss (no word on how that kitty died), played with day old baby mice with Amy Winehouse and a cat while filming it for YouTube prosperity, and made his cat smoke crack. Forget trying to convert us all to vegetarians, you need to convert Pete Doherty into a sane person.

Last question: how the hell can Pete Doherty afford to even rent a house with a pond? Because I honestly thought every dollar he’s ever made went straight into crack. Perhaps his ‘pond’ is really a ‘puddle’ and Pete is confused. It does rain lots in London.

Pete Doherty is shown performing at the Brighton Centre in Brighton, England on 3/19/09. Credit: Alex Broadway/WENN.com. He is also shown at the NME Awards on 2/25/09. Credit: Daniel Deme/WENN.com

It’s widely been reported that Pete Doherty wants to win back Kate Moss. Because their relationship obviously worked out so well the first time. Instead of showing up at her doorstep with a bouquet of flowers, Pete has decided to go the nontraditional – albeit just as romantic – route of having Kate’s favorite deceased cat formed into a ring. How could this possibly go wrong?

Pete Doherty is planning to have the ashes of his cat Shelley made into a diamond ring.

The singer has commissioned the piece from US company LifeGem and insiders claims Pete, 29, is planning to give the sparkler to ex Kate Moss, 34.

Shelley was her favourite pet when they dated last year, reports the Daily Star, and he’s hoping the gift will help win her back now she’s split from Jamie Hince, 39.

Kate is reported to have dumped The Kills star because he was spending too much time with bandmate Alison Mosshart.

‘Kate was upset with Jamie because he often doesn’t pick up his phone when he’s with her,’ a source tells the News Of The World.

‘Kate shouted at him that he has a closeness with her that they don’t have.’

[From NOW Magazine]

So, to sum up: Kate Moss: jealous of ex-boyfriend’s bandmate; Pete Doherty making cat Shelly into diamond ring. Essentially, everything is status quo in the lives of these two.

This is one of those stories you’d assume is a crazy internet rumor, except that because it’s Pete Doherty it is entirely possible. In fact I think the odds are much greater that Pete plans on turning Shelly into a diamond (I’m assuming that’s how it works; I’m way too afraid to look at the company’s website to find out) than him writing a love poem or something. Unless he wrote it in his own blood. To go with the blood artwork that he did. I’m not even trying to be outlandish here. Pete did do that. Hopefully he has no more pets in his possession, or I’m afraid Pete might come up with the materials for a matching pendant.

Here’s Pete looking not quite as scary as expected performing live in concert at the Royal Albert Hall in London on Saturday. Images thanks to WENN.

Last week the interweb was abuzz with the news that Pete Doherty was going to sell-out ex girlfriend Kate Moss in an autobiography. Supposedly Sexy Pete – as he’s known in my house – was going to dish some dirt about their sex life, all the drugs, and probably something about a lack of bathing. Now Pete has apparently had a change of heart, which isn’t all that surprising. It’s highly doubtful he even remembers last week. Yes, now Pete wants Kate back, now that she just broke up with her boyfriend, The Kills singer Jamie Hince.

Jamie Hince’s side of Kate Moss’s bed may still be warm, but Pete Doherty is already trying to jump in to it. Just as we warned yesterday the shambolic druggie is trying to weasel his way back into Kate’s life. And he’s been boasting to mates about how he reckons he is going to get back with his ex. In his addled mind Pete believes that he and the stunningly successful model are the perfect couple - and texted her to tell her so.

And we’re told it was these latenight love texts that drove The Kills frontman Jamie over the edge. So far Kate’s managed to control the desire to run back to the arms of the filthy-fingernailed one. But his pitiful pleadings are relentless. Last month he posted a video of himself on YouTube singing a song about how much he missed her. And when he heard Kate and Jamie had hit a rocky patch he swooped in with his adolescent poetic scribblings.

A source said: “Jamie was furious when Pete got in touch about a week ago. And over the last three nights he and Kate have texted each other until the early hours. Pete’s been showing the texts to mates and thinks he is on the verge of winning her back but his mates aren’t convinced.”

Think of your sheets, Kate..!

[From the Mirror]

Normally I really loathe the additional commentary that’s often in articles in The Mirror, but they are totally right. Kate’s sheets, curtains, tablecloths… really, textiles of any kind are in real, real danger. And though it rarely is mentioned in terms of Doherty, let’s not forget that Kate has a 5-year-old daughter, Lila Grace. Though she’s not exactly known for being the most devoted parent in the world, I shudder to think of the parent that would willingly bring Pete Doherty into their child’s life. Especially as a parental-type figure.

Hopefully Kate will continue to rebuff Pete’s advances. If there is any decency or goodness in the world.

Here’s Pete Doherty after he bought a painting of Kate Moss at his impromptu gig at Jazz after Dark in Soho, London on June 3rd. The look on his face is not at all creepy. Really. Photographer: ydimage.com. Header of Kate and Pete together in London in April 2007. Photographer: Gucci. Images thanks to WENN.

If I were a parent, I could think of few things I would find more terrifying than the prospect of Pete Doherty ever getting near any of my children. Or my pets. Or my houseplants. Really, the thought of Pete anywhere near anything living is just too much for me to handle.

Singer Sting has reportedly hit the roof over news that his 17-year-old daughter Coco has been hanging out with Pete. A lot. Some of it has been in the studio (Coco is working on her debut CD), but the two spent a good deal of time together in a tent at the Glastonbury music festival last weekend – much to Sting’s chagrin.

The Police frontman reportedly went through the roof when it emerged 17-year-old Coco was within spitting distance of the celebrated junkie. A fellow Glastonbury festival-goer spotted the Babyshambles singer, 29, lying down in Coco’s tent at the music festival.

Pete and Coco Sumner’s friendship is blossoming after they met at a Soho jazz bar in London, and Pete has been helping her develop her songwriting and guitar skills. But the news that they were together at Glastonbury, where Pete played a solo set, seems to have been a step too far for Sting.

The onlooker said: ‘I was standing next to Coco’s tent after Pete had played his set, and one of her friends went to check on her. She unzipped the door, and Pete was lying outstretched in her tent. He looked very comfortable and was smoking something - the tent was full of smoke but it was impossible to tell what it was. He seemed pretty out of it, though.

‘Coco’s father isn’t too happy about her hanging around Pete because of his reputation, and hit the roof when he heard he had stayed in her tent.’

The source added: ‘Coco has definitely inherited her dad’s vocal skills and Pete has been raving about her talent. It’s pretty clear he has the hots for her too, which will only worry her dad more.’ While 56-year-old Sting, real name Gordon, and mum Trudy Styler, 53, will be pleased she is getting musical input from someone-as talented as Pete, we bet they hope that’s the only input he’s having. Otherwise Pete might quickly learn what Sting was singing about in The Police’s 1983 hit King Of Pain.

[From the Daily Mail]

I’m glad Sting freaked out. Any parent that would be okay with their 17-year-old hanging out with Pete Doherty shouldn’t be allowed to have kids. Just looking at the guy, I’m afraid bugs would jump off of him. And really, that’s the kindest thing I can say. I really don’t think he should be allowed to come closer than 10 feet to anyone. I cannot even imagine how many communicable diseases that man is carrying.

I know Doherty supposedly has oodles of talent, but if I were Coco’s parents, that wouldn’t even come close to canceling out all the bad he can potentially do. I’d suggest they make Coco shower three times a day, just to be safe. I’ve heard soap is like kryptonite to Pete Doherty.

Here’s Coco Sumner, Pete Doherty and Sam Shaker playing at Jazz After Dark in London on May 29th. Photographer: ydimage.com. Images thanks to WENN.

These two are probably just friends who have multiple arrests, music, nationality and a love of drugs in common, but look how the two drunken singers are hanging onto each other outside of Amy’s house. She has an opening for a new leech after her husband, Blake Fielder Civil, took up with a blond ex girlfriend who started visiting him in prison. She’s been auditioning various guys these past few weeks, and Doherty seems just her type unfortunately.

Amy and Pete were seen in a half-hearted hug or trying to keep each other from falling flat on their faces back at her place after a gig by Pete’s band, Babyshambles. Judging from their hug, they’re probably just friends, and they’re both pictured with other people that night. They look like they could be brother and sister.

NME reports that Pete Doherty and Amy Winehouse are rumored to be recording a single duet to come out this summer. That can only increase his credibility and diminish hers:

According to the Daily Star Doherty’s Babyshambles bandmate, Mik Whitnall, has held a series of songwriting sessions with Winehouse in preparation for a single release this summer.

The newspaper claims that the supposed single will also feature on the next Babyshambles album, and that Doherty said: “Mick and Amy have a great relationship. They have been working on material while I was in prison.

“When I came out I went straight to the recording studio. I just want to get going.”

[From NME.com]

Producer Mark Ronson recently revealed that Amy won’t be recording the theme song for the upcoming Bond movie because she’s just not ready to work at this point. I hope for Amy’s sake this Pete Doherty duet story is fake, because she should be focusing on her own music at this point.

There’s someone else who is disappointed that Winehouse won’t be featured on the soundtrack for the Bond film Quantum of Solace. Bond Star Daniel Craig is quoted as saying “she’s got an amazing voice and it think it would lend itself beautifully to this but we’ll see.”

In related Winehouse news that we didn’t get to because there are just too many stories about her, one of her male friends was arrested in her garage on Monday night. Kristian Marr went to visit her at home, and when she wasn’t there he holed up in her garage for the night. The police came and had him ejected.

Thanks to WENN for these photos.

Pete Doherty sure is going to have one heck of a messy life to clean up when he gets out of jail in a few weeks. The Mirror is reporting that Pete is thousands of dollars in debt to all sorts of people, including his dealers and his landlord. Both have (not surprisingly) gotten fed up with Pete. The landlord stopped by to check on the nine bedroom country estate, only to find that it had been trashed. Pete had sprayed human blood all over the place, had scrawled on the walls, and had abandoned his nine cats there.

Popping over to check on the place the landlord was horrified to find that his beautiful country pad had become a stinking hovel. The walls, floor and even some of the windows have been daubed with human blood. And we’re told the stench from his abandoned nine cats is so strong it would turn the strongest stomach. After taking one look at the carnage, the landlord canceled Doherty’s tenancy.

A close source says: “Pete is homeless, broke and owes thousands to dealers. He destroyed the place by scribbling on the walls, the floor, anywhere he felt like it. The beautiful heavy curtains were ripped down and the cats are just running around abandoned. It’s a really pathetic state of affairs. No one in their right mind is going to rent him a property after what he did.” The junkie has been receiving threats from out-of-pocket dealers while he’s been inside Wormwood Scrubs [prison], and things aren’t going to get any better for him when he’s released next month.

[From the Mirror]

Pete’s old friends and dealers have also been stopping by the country estate and taking his things to sell in an attempt to collect some of the money he owes them. The Mirror tries to make it sound like they’re taking advantage of Pete, but considering they also state they’re just doing it to make back some of the money they’re owed, it doesn’t sound that out of line.

The friends and dealers probably aren’t going about it in a legal manner, but considering the other things dealers are known to do to get their money, Pete’s probably pretty damn lucky. Something tells me that all of this isn’t going to make it any easier for Pete Doherty to get back on his feet. But let’s be honest, it’s not like there’s any reason to believe he was going to pull it all together at this point.

Petey boy sure is living the life now that he’s in jail where he belongs. According to the always reliable Sun, Pete is getting the star treatment at West London’s Wormwood Scrubs jail. Yes that really is the name of the facility. No it’s not a weird Harry Potter joke or something. I wasn’t impressed with the British legal system after they gave Doherty so many second chances. But it’s all okay now, because they have a jail named Wormwood Scrubs. We’re cool London, don’t worry.

Pete has been given TWO mattresses, extra bedding, a television, and a radio. Apparently that hasn’t helped his popularity with the other inmates – something Doherty might want to give a little more consideration to.

Prisoners normally have to spend weeks earning points for good behaviour before being handed such privileges. Doherty, 29, is in the segregation wing with 16 high-risk lags, including paedophiles. A source said: “He’s in the segregation unit because of who he is. It’s thought he could be vulnerable. He’s been put on enhanced privileges, which means he can have virtually what he wants, so that includes an extra mattress, TV and radio. It’s basically the five-star treatment, which takes most prisoners weeks of good behaviour to achieve.”

Babyshambles singer Doherty told a friend he was terrified of jail. His solicitor said: “Pete obviously didn’t want to go to prison but he was philosophical.”

[From The Sun]

As much as it’s fun to joke (Ooooh, two mattresses!) by the looks of Pete Doherty, I’m guessing his jail cell is a lot nicer than his home. Think about it; have you ever seen him looking anything less than totally dirty and disgusting? Now imagine what his domicile must look like. I highly doubt there’s even one mattress. Whoever thought going to jail would be a step up for Pete? Maybe he’ll consider his luxurious accommodations so inviting that he’ll choose to stay a bit longer – or better yet, move on to a five year, in-patient rehab program. I don’t think they have those, but if there’s ever a person to design one for, it’s Pete.

After approximately 1,283,374,934 arrests, trips to court, and overnight stints in jail, it appears the law may finally have caught up to Pete Doherty. Pete’s been ordered to serve 14 weeks in jail for a variety of offenses, most notably for violating his probation on a plethora of previous drug charges. This is pretty remarkable given that Doherty has somehow managed to evade pretty much every reasonable form of punishment and rehabilitation for years of drug offenses.

Troubled Babyshambles frontman Pete Doherty was finally sent to jail today for breaking his probation order. He was taken from West London Magistrates’ Court and locked up for 14 weeks following a 30 minute hearing this afternoon. Doherty was jailed for ‘his breach of time keeping, non compliance of his order and using different drugs’, a spokesperson from the court confirmed.

Back in October, Judge Davinder Lachar cleared Doherty from the remainder of a drug control order but handed him his suspended jail sentence for drug and motoring offences. The 29-year-old was given a four-month custodial sentence, suspended for two years. On that occasion he handed an 18-month supervision order and a 12-month drug rehabilitation order. Lachar ordered he pay a £400 fine for an driving without insurance and a £75 fine for having no MOT certificate [similar to an emissions inspection in the US].

[From Metro]

Clearly getting clean is not a really big priority for Pete Doherty. And I wish I could say that 14 weeks in jail would probably change that, but let’s be realistic. Really, the only thing that will come of this is that the world will see you can only be arrested on various drug charges for six or seven years before you will spend several weeks in jail. So really, it will serve as quite the public deterrent. Actually what should serve as quite the public deterrent is any photo of Pete Doherty. That’s a hell of a lot scarier than jail time.

Here’s Pete and his sexiness at the Thames Magistrates Court in London on November 10, 2007. Images thanks to PR Photos.

The Sun reports that Pete Doherty’s new girlfriend, DJ Nadine Ruddy, is into Scientology and that he has bought a bunch of books from the cult to try and learn more about it. If Doherty was just an average, unknown musician/former drug addict/low level criminal, he would simply be put on a mailing list after buying Scientology books. Now that the word is out that a semi-famous person is interested, those dead-eye creeps are going to after him with a vengeance.

The junkie rocker is hooked on the barmy religion which believes humans are an exiled race from outer space.

Babyshambles frontman Pete, 29 — who once dated supermodel KATE MOSS — has bought a pile of books on the subject since meeting Scientologist DJ NADINE RUDDY.

And he has been leaving his Wiltshire mansion to stay at her home in Reading, Berks, at least once a week.

A source said: “Nadine is really into Scientology. She takes her beliefs very seriously.

“Pete’s chatted a lot with her about it. He went out and bought some books to read up about it.

“He just wanted to find out more about Nadine and what she believes in.”

[From The Sun]

Despite all of Doherty’s very public failings: injecting a passed out girl with drugs (he claimed he was taking her blood for his art, which is somewhat less creepy), giving his cat crack, squirting blood at an MTV camera, all the drugs he’s been busted with, I kind of have a soft spot for the guy. He doesn’t seem all that bad, and when you check out his boyish face and ignore the messed-up teeth and greasy hair you can sort of see how some skinny half-wit models fell for him.

Best wishes to Doherty to come out of this with his critical thinking skills and wallet intact. Dump that girl, Pete, there are other confused young women who are into harmless new-agey stuff who would be pleased to shag you.

The ever-diligent journalists at the UK’s Daily Star are reporting that druggie/rocker/crazy person Pete Doherty is planning on opening up an animal sanctuary… quite possibly in his house. Pete was once famously photographed giving crack to a kitten, so it didn’t exactly seem like he was the biggest animal welfare advocate. But apparently that’s all changed, thanks to the love of a three-legged hedgehog. No I’m not being sarcastic. Pete Doherty really did rescue a three-legged hedgehog that he found in the road. As an aside, I’m pretty sure the fact that hedgehogs run around in the wild is the greatest thing about England. They’re freaking adorable. Anyway, Pete named the little pig Mrs. Tiggg-Winkle, after Beatrix Potter’s famed hedgehog. And apparently his life has been forever changed.

An insider said: “Pete rescued the hedgehog. It had a leg missing and he felt sorry for it.

“He made sure it got the proper help it needed from a vet and set up a special section for it in his garden.

“Pete has a big heart. He also loves rats and is looking after one with no tail.

“He has lots of kittens, too, and hopes that by the end of the year he will be able to open his pet rescue centre at Marlborough to local schools so they can educate children about animals.”

[From the Daily Star]

Well this sounds like an all-out fabulous idea. You’ve got a three-legged hedgehog. You’ve got a rat without a tail. You’ve got kittens upon kittens. Really, what more do you need to educate children about animals? This is what I imagine Pete Doherty’s tour will sound like. “Here’s a broken spiny thing. Here’s my crack pipe. Here’s a broken pointy-nosed thing that ought to have a tail. Here’s some cats mating. That makes more cats. Here’s my collection of bongs. Don’t touch the glass one. Here, play with the plastic one.” It’ll be very informative. And what parents in their right mind wouldn’t want to take their kids over to Pete Doherty’s to hang out with some animals and acid? That’s right, boring ones. Pete Doherty’s had a lot of bad ideas. Throwing a vial of his own blood on a camera. Dating Kate Moss. But an animal sanctuary has got to be the absolute worst.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Pete performing with Babyshambles in Concert at Olympia Hall in Paris - January 14, 2008. Images thanks to PR Photos.