Tom Cruise at the ‘Jack Reacher’ UK premiere: you would never hit it, right?

Tom Cruise

Here are some photos of Tom Cruise at the London premiere of Jack Reacher, and of course he’s wearing his lifts. Why wouldn’t he? This time around, it’s even more important that Tom look fake-tall because he’s playing a 6’5″ brick sh-thouse in the movie. But still, there’s nothing new about these stylish high heels (or him getting lazy with blue jeans at a premiere), so let’s just take a good look at Tom’s face. We can do that, right? Because about a year ago, Tom walked many red carpets for Misson: Impossible 4 while looking like he had the best plastic surgeon ever. Here, Tom looks like he’s skipped his pre-red carpet botoxing sessions in an effort to milk his lonely and miserable post-divorce persona. Instead of ‘tox, Tom is wearing an ungodly amount of makeup for the cameras. Foundation city, people.

Tom Cruise

Before we get to the rest of the red carpet appearances, here’s a quick update on Tom’s upcoming holiday situation with Suri. Of course, Tom was presumed to have spent Thanksgiving with Suri in London (after a 17 week absence in her life) even though he was on the All You Need Is Kill set all weekend long, but now Tom’s putting it out there (via People) that he’ll be spending Christmas with all of his children. That is, Bella, Connor, and Suri as well? That’s what Tom’s camp wants us to believe:

Tom Cruise

It’s shaping up to be a very merry Christmas for Tom Cruise.

Looking upbeat and winter-warm in a navy sweater and jeans at the London premiere of his new crime thriller Jack Reacher on Monday, the actor, 50, spoke to reporters for the first time since his split from Katie Holmes.

“We have got lots of very special things planned [for the holidays],” said Cruise. He added that he plans to spend Christmas with his kids Bella, 20, Connor, 17, and Suri, 6. “We are all going to be together. I am looking forward to it.”

Based in London since August while he shoots the sci-fi action film All You Need Is Kill, Cruise says he feels right at home across the pond.

“I love it here,” he tells PEOPLE. “I have made so many films here and I have worked with so many of the actors here. It is a wonderful place to live.”

Make that live and work. “I am shooting a film over here … seven days a week. But I feel great,” he added. “It doesn’t take up all my time, but I have a very busy schedule and I like it that way.”

[From People]

Naturally, I don’t buy this pro-Tom story because with most divorces, parents alternate holidays with children. Like, Tom would get Thanksgiving this year and Katie would take Christmas, and then next year they’d swap schedules. Also, the Mail quoted a source saying that Suri would be with Katie for the winter holiday break including Christmas. Of course, now that Tom strategically managed to (allegedly) see Suri a few weeks ago without grinning for the paps, now he can also just lie about seeing her whenever he feels like lying about it. So we’ll see what happens.

Now let’s move onto the little bit of fashion present on this chilly London red carpet. Tom’s leading ladies have been wearing a lot of yellow this year (see Julianne Hough in chartreuse for the RoA premiere), and Rosamund Pike is following this ill-advised trend.

Rosamund Pike

Actually, I’ve got nothing against yellow on the red carpet and thoroughly enjoyed Kristen Stewart’s chrome yellow for BD2 Madrid premiere last month. Here, Rosamund goes with canary yellow in a full-length, backless Alexander McQueen gown that has an awkward cut-out effect from the front view, which exposes her prominent rib cage for all to see. Are those blue shoes peeping out from below the gown? Yes, but again, the color choices are not really the problem here — the shape and cut of this dress are both so awkward, and I swear it looks (from the back view) like this gown has a drawstring waist. Rosamund is looking kind of tweaked, but I do like her hair.

Rosamund Pike

Rosamund Pike

Robert Duvall is in this movie as well, but I’m not mad at that. He deserves a big-budget paycheck too.

Robert Duvall

Now it’s time for more gratuitous, insincere Tom Cruise photos, which are some of my very favorite things ever.

Tom Cruise

Tom Cruise

Tom Cruise

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

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63 Responses to “Tom Cruise at the ‘Jack Reacher’ UK premiere: you would never hit it, right?”

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  1. Toniko says:

    Too much makeup for one little man. concealer srsly?

  2. JenD says:

    I know this is crazy, but TC is still hot to me. But I just want to look from afar. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere near his brand of crazy.

  3. Hannah says:

    In answer to your question: RIGHT!

  4. Bowers says:

    It’s the inside that counts, so, no, I wouldn’t.

  5. Ranunculus says:

    Who still goes to see his movies, who still invest in his movies? Isn’t it completely obvious by now – finally – that he is creepy, crazy, dangerous, sick, weird and besides an awful actor.

  6. Miss Kiki says:

    OK, I’ll be honest (I know I’m not the only one either) many, many eons ago I would have. I mean way back in the days before I knew what loonies Co$ were and before I had a better grasp of how the PR game worked so I thought Tommy Girl was a genuinely friendly guy, I would have hit it. There I’ve said it, I feel much better now.

  7. marie says:

    with a shovel, right to the face..

    umm, if he had custody of Suri for Thanksgiving, then she Katie’s for Christmas-that’s how it works right?

  8. Nashville Girl says:

    Such a rhetorical question because…ooh gross! Also, weren’t there reports that Connor actually stayed in LA for Thanksgiving?

  9. Aubra says:

    I would…and I would regret nothing!

    I have had a theory for the last year that Tom is secretly jealous of Bradley Cooper. Tom is grinding as much if not more than Bradley, yet Bradley is getting more and more noteriety and accolades for his work now. Tom is still kicking it some 20 years later, knocking out films and yet here is Bradley only been a “name” for a few years and BOOM! He gets two films with DeNiro and all these awards at the end of the year for one GREAT film, and likely an Oscar nod…

    Tom get the sympathy p*ssy!

  10. only1shmoo says:

    No, no and NO! Friends don’t let friends sleep with Scientologists! You know that afterwards you’d be subjected to some invasive questioning that runs along the lines of, ‘how does T.C. compare to all your past lovers? *cough* choose your answer wisely’

  11. dorothy says:

    No. I just can’t get passed the whole Scientologist thing. Just knowing he’s crazy for them turns off any kind of attraction.

  12. Miss Kiki says:

    Can I also add that I would have totally got on John ‘Wiglet of Doom’ Travolta back in his Grease days.

  13. GossipG says:

    Tom looks really rough.The lady in the yellow dress needs a BIG MAC ASAP!

  14. Mich says:

    Ewwww. Even without the CO$ baggage he is soooo icky. That manic laugh, annoying voice, condescending attitude.

    I’ve never, ever, understood what people see in him.

  15. Amy C says:

    He looks good here actually. He is letting his face to have characters this days . In last oscars where he was presenting he looked so 21 year old that everyone was screaming too much work done. Which probably he did then haha.

  16. MSL says:

    Just because someone’s crazy doesn’t mean their not hot. He looks good here. I don’t care that he tries to be taller. I wear high heels because I don’t embrace my shortness.

  17. Ginger says:

    If we’re just talking about his looks and not his cray-cray, I’d still hit it. He is looking HOT!

  18. Eleonor says:

    I don’t know what the hell he is doing, but his face looks damn good. Even with too much foundation. Maybe it’s the crazyness.

  19. shewolf says:

    No… he’s too… compact. And strange.

  20. MsLib says:

    I have read all of the Jack Reacher books by Lee Child. Tom Cruise will never fit into Jack Reacher’s shoes.

    Will probably wait until the DVD comes out.

    Must be on a shoe kick today ;-)

  21. Jenna says:

    Ah, Rosamund! Love her!

    And how do lifts work exactly? Do they simply go inside the man’s shoe? Or are they built in some way? o_O

  22. Tazina says:

    His little short legs turn me off and the whole Scientology thing. So no.

  23. Dahlia1947 says:

    I like Tom. that’s enough for me to say that yes, I would hit it! He looks really good for his age! The plastic surgery is not obvious, if he’s had any. Yes I would!

  24. Annie says:

    He does look good here….but no way. I wouldn’t even hit it with someone else’s cooch!

  25. Velouria says:

    WHat’s with the name of this movie? All I can think about is what the p0rn name will be:
    “Jack Reacharound”

  26. hatsumomo says:

    Oh god! I read over on Pajiba that Tom Cruise wants to head the new possible terminator remake as the T-800. Um…HELL NO! No matter how much CGI, shoe-lifts and fakery you throw at it, Tom will never measure up to Arnold’s T-800!!! I can only assume Tom thinks its good for his brand to do super bad-ass movies to get people to pay attention to him and/or like him or some such…

  27. Velouria says:

    I’ll be glad when hotdog mustard yellow is OUT…I can’t think of too many people it looks good on.

  28. hausfrau says:

    Oh My F–k, is that a blue suede jacket!? Who wears a blue suede sport coat in ANY season? Also it doesn’t fit very well – but that why you shouldn’t make a sport coat out of f–king suede.

  29. Em-Ma says:

    The thing that strikes me about this, not to imply that I care, is that Tom looks very very sad. I’ve never seen him smile like that. Have you?

  30. Susie Q says:

    I would rather shove bamboo under my fingernails unless you mean hit it, as in with my fist, then yes, I would hit it. Why doesn’t he just come out and get it over with?

  31. lilred says:

    Yes, I would! Still love him despite his religious affiliations.

  32. Izzy says:

    Sure. I’d hit it with a baseball bat, as I run screaming out of the forced auditing session (’cause you won’t get me in there voluntarily).

  33. Zombie Shortcake says:

    I’m curious about his exact quote to the reporters. Did he name his kids specifically including Suri? Or did he just use the vague “all of them” or “all of us”? Like way back in the Telluride Oprah interview, when he was asked how often Bella and Connor visit their Mom. I believe he said “whenever”: Keeping answers vague for both optimal PR and fulfilling CO$ requirements.

  34. jamie says:

    hell noooooooooooooooo! he’s to nuts and that makes him unattractive!

  35. Celt Lady says:

    I would not ever hit it, however my dear friend Julie here in Ohio would, without a doubt.

    Am I right, JuJu. :)

    Now, give me some Pierce B any day of the week and I would hit it. Repeatedly.

  36. UrbanRube says:

    I’m not saying this would be Tom’s way as an ex-husband and co-parent, but I don’t agree that most divorced families alternate major holidays anymore. My ex and I still spend the big holidays with our daughter together, and we’ll do that until one of us has a new spouse and/or stepkids that have issues with it. As long as we can still be a family for her on the big days, we’re going to do it. My parents did the same thing and still do, even though they’re into the grandparent years. I find more and more divorced parents try to put on a family face, so to speak, at school events and on big days for the kids’ sake.

  37. CC says:

    He looks live a tiny-man-sized Ken doll (the brunette variety). Everything about him seems made of plasticine.

  38. dcypher1 says:

    I hate to admit this but I think if tc wasnt so crazy and brainwashed by xenu and an egomaniac he would actually be hot.

  39. Carolyn says:

    Tom as Ethan in Mission Impossible…yes absolutely. Joining the chorus of “no because of Co$”.

    Scientology is just so unattractive a quality in a potential mate.

  40. buckley says:

    Is that a blue tshirt under his blue polka dot blouse? So much blue!

  41. stunned says:

    it’s funny how people label other people as “crazy” so easily these days…I think it is far crazier to be obsessed with money,to be an atheist when creation is full of evidences of God’s existence,to support a soccer team and get into a fight or even kill someone for it, to support or tolerate abortion clinics right next to your door without doing anything,to support or tolerate prostitution,to be obsessed with fashion,to do anything for fame and money giving up own dignity,to adopt disgusting unnatural sexual practices and call it “making love”,to ignore poverty of other human beings…our society does this everyday and no one cares,who is crazier?