I remember the summer of 2011 quite fondly no reason at all (it was a tough one, actually), but to the gossip blogger in myself, it will always be the season of Weston Cage. If you’ll remember, Nic’s eldest son seemed to blossom in terms of craziness, and a whole lot of insanity appeared all at once. First Weston flew into a public rage at his personal trainer when the guy told Weston he couldn’t lunch upon something fatty on a menu. Then Weston and then-wife Nikki Williams were both booked on domestic violence charges, and Weston was almost immediately booked again. Then came the precious time that Weston shaved his head and showed off his roundhouse kick for the paps outside a steakhouse. It was a glorious display of bizarreness that culminated in Weston planning a reality show to show the world that he’s not crazy and declaring in November that he’d filed for divorce, and “Daddy is back.”

And then it stopped. And I was very sad.

All this time, I’ve been checking in on Weston from afar. I google the dude every month or so and find myself dismayed when nothing appears. How exactly does one show that much crazy in such a short amount of time and then simply rein it in? That is, unless it was all an act, but as the son of Nic Cage, I suspect that Weston comes by his particular brand of crazy in an honest manner. Similarly, Nikki Williams has been keeping a low profile and only surfaces on Twitter to talk about her music and post photos of various food and drink. All this time, these two have been hashing out the divorce, and now it’s finally over. What took so long? There were no kids involved (although Nikki was allegedly drunk and pregnant at one point), and there can’t be too many assets involved for the son of bankrupt Nic Cage. It turns out they spent a great deal of time arguing over who got to keep Nikki’s ring. Really:

Nicolas Cage’s son Weston and his wife Nikki Williams are officially divorced, TMZ has learned — but the crazy part … she gets to keep her wedding ring, despite promising to PAWN IT OFF.

As we reported, 22-year-old Weston filed for divorce back in 2011 — not really shocking, considering they were both arrested for domestic violence against each other after they tied the knot earlier that year … following a two-week engagement.

The divorce is now final — but according to the order, obtained by TMZ, 24-year-old Nikki gets to keep her wedding ring … along with the rights to her entire song catalog, including a track called “Pawn My Wedding Ring.”
The song was written last year, after Weston filed for divorce, and it contains the lyrics — “It started perfect, you were a different person / But you changed on me after the honeymoon was done.”

It continues … “And because it’s not worth anything / I’m about to pawn my wedding ring / Get rid of everything that was right or wrong.” See? It’s right there in black and white.

Meanwhile, Weston gets to keep his musical equipment, bank account, and songs … including fluffy uplifting hits like “Souless Eyes,” “Vampire Sentiment,” and “Heathen Sanctuary.”

Young love.

[From TMZ]

Honestly, this seems pointless to argue to drag out the legal process over a silly hunk of metal and gemstone. We don’t have a photo of the ring in question, but it really doesn’t matter what it looks like, and I don’t even see why it should matter who gets to keep a now-useless piece of jewelry unless it’s a family heirloom, but that’s not mentioned anywhere in the story. Who really wants to keep a ring from such a toxic relationship? When I got divorced, my ring was promptly tossed into the Arkansas river. I am such a romantic.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, and WENN