Dane Cook, 45, did a kissy beach photo op with his 19 year-old girlfriend


Do you remember the fact that terrible comic, Dane Cook, 45, is dating a 19 year-old singer/actress named Kelsi Taylor? Well he wants you to remember it, because Dane and Kelsi went to Hawaii together, where they posed for a photographer while kissing on the beach. We can’t afford those photos as they’re exclusives but you can see them on E! (Warning Dane is shirtless. I am playing the “picture him on top of you” game that Lainey started and it’s very unpleasant.) I would say that Dane is shameless but given his career we already knew that about him. Dane and Kelsi must not have been getting enough attention for their copious social media posts so here we are:

A source tells E! News, “Dane and Kelsi flew in on a private jet to Maui last Thursday. Dane loves Maui and visits a few times a year. He and Kelsi have already been once and they couldn’t wait to come back with friends for another vacation.”

The insider says that the lovey dovey couple has been “having a great time so far.”

As for how the trip’s been going, the spy says, “They’ve been spending a lot of time on the beach with friends, laying in the sand and wading into the ocean.”

The source also added that the two work well: “Dane and Kelsi are light hearted and playful together. They make each other laugh and are always having fun.”

The couple has been keeping busy, taking a day trip to Big Beach and enjoyed their time there.

The source said, “They were play fighting on the beach and dancing around. But they stopped themselves for some quick PDA. He grabbed her and pulled her in for a kiss. They held hands and canoodled on the beach before Kelsi put on a cover up and they went back to their hotel.”

“Dane and Kelsi worked out together in the hotel gym and had a fun dinner with their friends at the restaurant,” said the source. “They seem very happy together and can’t get enough of being in Hawaii.”

[From E! Online]

How does Dane Cook’s trip to Hawaii with his teenaged girlfriend (whom he started dating when she was 18) merit so many insider quotes about what they’re doing? I mention this every once in a while as I honestly wonder – when minor celebrities call the paps like this while they’re on vacation, do they get to write off the trip? Do they deduct part of it, like when you take a client to dinner and can deduct 50%? This is benefiting both their careers. Dane, because we’re talking about him for something other than being a gross, joke-stealing Botoxed mess and Kelsi, because she’s getting her name out there. Is it worth it to be forever known as Dane Cook’s onetime girlfriend? Because that doesn’t seem like something you could easily live down, especially with this photo evidence.

mahalooooooooh 🌺

A post shared by kelsi taylor (@itskelsitaylor) on

A post shared by kelsi taylor (@itskelsitaylor) on

Photos via Instagram and Twitter

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80 Responses to “Dane Cook, 45, did a kissy beach photo op with his 19 year-old girlfriend”

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  1. SilverUnicorn says:

    Ugh. Yuck.

    I am a fan of ‘age is just a number’ but it usually involves adult people. This woman is barely out of her teens.

    • Red says:

      She’s still in her teens! It’s so gross. He’s gross. I don’t think she’s getting many career opportunities being with him but I guess she’s getting free shit from it? I couldn’t do it, those kissing pictures grossed me outtttt.

      • Sabrine says:

        Well obviously he’s not in it for the deep conversations they’re not going to have. It should burn out when she gets tired of old man daddy not wanting to party every night or go out to see the latest band in town he’s never heard of. They’re both using each other for different reasons and I don’t feel sorry for either one of them.

    • Flk says:

      Yep. She’ll be a completely different person in 5 years, let alone 25. (Should be, anyway). It will be 6 years before her brain is done developing… think about it. Not to mention her confidence to assert boundaries or make sure her needs are being met. It’s not about the age difference, it’s about the life and developmental stage difference.

      As a society, we do NOT raise women to put themselves first and speak up when they’re uncomfortable with something from a young age. Sadly it’s
      often creeps like him who teach them that. It’s a certain kind of guy who goes after late teens-early 20s girls and he is not looking for an equal partner.

      • Otaku Fairy says:

        I doubt this relationship will last 6 years, 5 years, or even 3. It’s unlikely that either party is looking at the other as a life partner. Which is fine.
        What you’re saying about society raising women to put themselves last and not be assertive is true, but more moral restrictions around choices about sex and dating for young women wouldn’t to do anything to improve this problem. It’s hard to learn to be assertive through being infantilized.

      • blonde555 says:

        She looks pretty comfortable to me.

      • Flk says:

        Not sure where you got the idea I want to ban young women from dating creeps.

        And the 5 years I referred to was about how “Age is just a number” doesn’t apply in your late teens-early 20s, as it’s a huge developmental gap at this age. Wasn’t talking about how lomg their relationship is gonna last, I definitely don’t expect them to be together in 5 years lol. Unless he traps her with a kid of course.

      • hmmmm says:

        Flk this is a wonderful comment and really hit home for me. Thank you.

    • Wren says:

      She is legally an adult. We may not view her as being truly an adult yet, but she is. What I wonder is if she really was a legal adult when they started dating.

    • ElleC says:

      Yup, one word for this: GROSS.
      It would be gross if it were a woman in Dane’s position dating a boy child. Maybe this would be less gross if she was a grown-ass woman in her 30s and he in his 50/60s, but COME ON!
      I don’t care if it’s consensual. I don’t care if they’re both getting something out of this. This. Is. Gross.

    • BorderMollie says:

      And the power differential here is huge. It’s one thing when it’s someone like Mary Kate Olsen and her much older husband. She’s established and independent on her own. This girl honestly is just a girl getting her start in life, with nothing of her own yet. Blah!

  2. HH says:

    I saw these photos yesterday and I was thoroughly disgusted. I wonder what their family and friends think. I just don’t think this is a simple “live and let live” situation. I’d be side-eyeing them every chance I got and probably dropping some shade.

    • Chaine says:

      They were awful, right? The pix look like someone kissing her dad, and not a hot dad, a dad with a gut and messy grizzled grey chest hair.

      • Kitten says:

        The shirtless pics were just sad. Hot young woman with perfect bod dates sloppy-looking, middle-aged has-been. Tale as old as time in Hollywood but somehow still so jarring to behold the contrast.

    • PIa says:

      Yes THIS! All these accounts with hanging out with friends on the beach…if my friend started dating an 18 yo, I would not be booking vacations with them.

    • Wren says:

      Having been the friend of a girl who at 19 dated a guy in his 30s, I would side eye the hell out of both of them constantly. Having been the casual acquaintance of a man in his 40s talking about dating a woman barely in her 20s, I would think “and just what is wrong with you that you need to date someone young enough not to know better?” Are you bad in bed? Do you want the dubious status of being a “stud”? Are you really that immature and/or unintelligent? Are you a manipulative ass who needs to more or less own his partner?

      • Chaine says:

        Sooo right. Even now, I’m in my 40s and have friends dating guys in their 60s and it’s still weird to me, I can’t help thinking, “When we were in elementary school this guy was hanging out in discos and wearing leisure suits.”

  3. David says:

    Very creepy!

  4. Lilith says:

    Ew. He looks really whipped by her. Thirsty. She”ll be running away fron him soon.

    • Lolo86lf says:

      So what you’re saying is that he is pus*y whipped by her and she is thirsty for his money and fame? I think you’re right, question is: who will dump who first?

      • Kitten says:

        Unless his career has a miraculous and unexpected resurrection, she will dump him first.

      • Lolo86lf says:

        She will dump him when his money run out.

      • Diana says:

        I can sadly relate to this situation having dated a 42 year old when I was 21… he was my college professor and it ended exactly as you describe. If this young woman is anything like me at that age, she is probably confusing her self worth with his adoration of her appearance. She wants love (probably because she didn’t get the love she needed from a father figure in her life) and settling for someone who lusts after like an object instead. She will need years of therapy to see her true value. Hopefully she gets out fast. Dane should know better as the “adult” in this situation. He is also a sad and broken man who needs his manlihood validated by the “young piece” who is naive and dumb enough to be infactuated with him.

    • ElleC says:

      I’m baffled by peeps who worry for the famous, wealthy, adult man dating a non-famous, barely legal girl… the cards are heavily stacked in Dane’s favour, but sure, pour one out for all the geriatric sleazes who should have known better!

  5. Mia4s says:

    This is the most I’ve heard his name in years.

    I’m seeing a “date me honey and I’ll get you a reality show” situation. Or hey maybe she really lov…AHAHAHAHAHAHA! I couldn’t even finish that sentence.

  6. grabbyhands says:

    So gross. So very, very gross.

    I hope whatever celebrity she is able to glean from being with this loser is worth it. I’d be puking all the time and I’m not sure I’d be able to look at myself in the mirror.

  7. Neelyo says:

    Ew, that second to last pic he looks like he forgot to put his dentures in.

    He is aging in dog years. And he can’t have that much money, right?

    • Lolo86lf says:

      Keep in mind that sometimes pictures don’t do people justice,he may look better in person. Still he is a lot older than her, and honestly I really don’t feel sorry for either one of them. He is using her for her youth and looks, and she is using him for his money and fame.

      • RDolly30 says:

        I actually saw him at the airport last year on my way to Hawaii – he looks like a disgusting bloated mess in person. Never a fan but I was genuinely shocked how terrible he looked.

  8. Léna says:

    That last photo is really creepy.
    I’m 21, my dad 49 and I could never see myself dating someone that age. What do they even talk about ?

  9. Talie says:

    Aiming for a reality show, I guess.

    It’s amazing how far he has fallen…in the early aughts, he was considered a major heart throb. Got cast as the lead in a slew of comedies. Wow.

  10. Nicole says:

    I’m guessing this is part of her career launch. Because Dane Cook is irrelevant and I couldn’t tell you one thing he’s done in the last 5-10 years

  11. Jess says:

    Ugh. He is gross.

  12. SoulSPA says:

    What’s in it for them: for him, (enhanced) stud image. For her: a few open doors for acting/singing/instagram. For both: exposure and hopefully some (tacky) work opportunities and some money.

  13. Nadia says:

    I don’t usually comment but I had to say that they look like father and daughter. She looks younger and he looks older. Gross.

  14. Who ARE these people? says:

    They’re “playful” because she’s a child. So much playing.

  15. Eric says:

    Hey, when he was 30, she was 4.

    When he was 40 she was 14.

    When he reached the drinking age (21), she was …..

    • whatWHAT? says:

      I did this game on the first post about this.

      he’s 45 and she’s 19. When he was 25 and dating 19 year olds, SHE WASN’T BORN YET.

      *shudders*

      • Kitten says:

        Oh god somehow you guys managed to gross me out even more lol. Thank you for that.

      • Brittney B. says:

        This thread reminds me of that SNL sketch “Meet Your Second Wife”. The last “wife” was still a fetus. Must go re-watch it now!

  16. TurkeyLurkey says:

    From Danes instagram pic: #relationshipgoals LOL

    I always wonder what mom and dad think…

  17. Jayna says:

    He looked so old and out of shape on the beach. Ugh. He’s not a hot 45-year-old man. I could at least get her attraction to him, even if much older, if he was a sexy and handsome 45-year-old celeb.
    .

    • Kitten says:

      Yeah not like he’s Idris Elba or Jude Law. It’s not so much his age, it’s the fact that he looks like junk.
      That’s what kind of confuses me though: what’s in it for her? Do you think she genuinely likes the guy? *shivers*

      • isabelle says:

        He does look like junk and like someone if he was in real life suburbs, she wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole. He looks like he has been on a lot of binders in life.

      • nb says:

        The funniest part of those pictures is the candid pictures on the beach, where you can see just how out of shape he is, and then the posed Instagram pictures where he’s sucking in so hard and clenching his fists to make it look like he’s got great arms. Seriously, Dane Cook is funny – just not in the way he wants to be!

  18. Shambles says:

    Lord help her future therapist

  19. whatWHAT? says:

    I love the mention about how they worked out at the gym together.

    uh, HE hasn’t “worked out” in a LONG time, based on those photos. more like, SHE worked out and he sat at the smoothie bar and got a massage.

    also based on those pics, if he wasn’t a “famous comedian”, she would LAUGH IN HIS FACE if he tried to pick her up looking like that. she’s pretty and she’s very fit. he’s NOT fit at all and has perpetual douche-face.

    • Kitten says:

      Judging by his arms, I think he actually does work out pretty consistently..probably gave up the ‘roids. I also think he’s likely a big-time drinker because that gut don’t lie.

    • whatWHAT? says:

      eh, in the beach photos, his arms don’t look very defined to me. I think he’s doing the “use your fist to push up your bicep” trick in that one pic, because you KNOW that Fred Durst-looking mf’er is sucking in his gut big time in that same pic.

  20. gabbie says:

    why are we talking about this guy these days? wasn’t he over a decade ago?

  21. nikzilla says:

    GROSS. He looks so old next to her. Even with all his fillers.

  22. the_blonde_one says:

    I saw the shirtless pictures. Looking at these pictures I must say- I could learn a thing or two from his ‘suck it in’ game because he does a fantastic job hiding that gut. I look at him and randomly think ‘steroids and meth’.

  23. trollontheloose says:

    that’s his way of kissing? he looks like he’s gonna vomit on her.

  24. Molly says:

    I follow him on Instagram, and he was really into diet and exercise this summer. He looked a bit like Carrot Top with some sad and thirsty mirror pics, but he was clearly feeling himself.
    He started dating this young woman shortly thereafter. So yes, she was dating a man old enough to be her father, but he was relatively fit and not your typical 40-something, shlubby dad-bod. A bit John Stamos-esque.
    Well, I hope that room service is worth it because that is NOT what she signed up for in June. Dane is not rich or famous enough to justify pulling teenagers with that flabby gut.

  25. JA says:

    Vomit inducing. Ugh hope banging a dude old enough to be her father is worth her self respect and dignity.

    • Otaku Fairy says:

      Did you know that women, like men, are individuals, and because of that, other women can have self-respect and dignity while still having sex that you, I, or the old lady next door find distasteful? Imagine that!

  26. Tea says:

    She just looks like a little girl. I mean, I can’t talk, when I was 18/19, I was dating older men. But a) not THIS old, and B) I really did not look like a little girl. many people mistook me for much older. She genuinely looks like a child. And I know that shouldn’t matter, gross is gross, but for a man that old to look at her and think, “yes, this is a great decision,” and for her to look at him (and he seems like, in okay, shape but he’s got that Pierce Brosnan in Mamma Mia, sort of old man body) and think, “This is exactly what an 18-year-old girl like me wants,” I just think, okay someone has issues here.
    –I mean, he’s basically a has-been? Most kids her age would not know who he was because his hey day was when she 8-years-old? Not that anyone who has accomplished his ticket sales 10 years ago should be called a has-been, but he he is really C/D list at this point in terms of star power.

  27. Patricia says:

    OMG look at her arm in the kissing pic on E! Site. She’s like “ugh I don’t even know where I can place my hand”. She doesn’t want to touch him!

  28. Wren says:

    Well, at least she looks into it. Whatever her motivations may be, at least she appears to be having a good time with all this. Dane just looks old and sad. His motivations couldn’t be clearer even if he had to carry around a big sign.

  29. Nicegirl says:

    My eldest son is 19. I keep wondering how her parents are feeling.

  30. JennyJenny says:

    At first glance, in that photo from EOnline, he looks like Harvey Weinstein!!!

  31. blonde555 says:

    Lmao he’s so gross. Look at him pumping out his muscles to make em look big with his hands underneath-squeezing in that stomach so hard his red face is gonna blow.

    She’s going to leave him in ~2yrs and he’s going to do a scorned middle age rage-woman-hating comedy tour.

  32. Littlestar says:

    *puke*

  33. Other Renee says:

    One day when I was at Starbucks, I saw a couple clearly on a first date who obviously had never met each other before (must have met online). He was in his 40s, she in her very early 20s. It was gross. He was obviously looking to date someone much younger. They looked ridiculous together. I was sitting right next to them so I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop but couldn’t help it. They had nothing to talk about of substance and the whole conversation was stilted and awkward. I kept thinking “He wants sex and she wants to get back at her parents.” Yeah I know I was making assumptions but still, it was gross.

  34. Brittney B. says:

    I heard from a friend of a friend of a friend of hers that he’s paying her for her company. Monthly stipend, plus all her bills.

    You literally couldn’t pay me to hang out with this guy, but if she’s a sugar baby or a sex worker of some sort… well, make that green. You do you, girl. As long as it’s on her terms!

  35. blonde555 says:

    I think that’s pretty standard and obvious in these situations. I don’t think a teen budget would allow for extravagant trips etc.

  36. blonde555 says:

    Ew ew ew. Just saw the beach pics. He Def used A TON OF photoshop in the gym pic together.

  37. hogtowngooner says:

    Age gap aside, how the heck does this has-been have access to a private jet and go to Maui multiple times per year. I should steal other people’s fart jokes and make garbage movies if that’s still on the table a decade later. Yeesh.

  38. LittlefishMom says:

    creep. yuck

  39. Christin says:

    Well, I had to see that beach photo. At least there were two nice scenic photos to somewhat offset how “real” that photo was.

    This guy was a bigger deal a dozen years ago, right? I remember him from the Employee movie with Jessica S.

  40. Loo says:

    I don’t care about the age difference. The girl seems into having a Sugardaddy so why should I care about her well being? PS, I hate Dane Cook and never thought he was good looking or talented.

  41. Ozogirl says:

    He looks awful…wow. Hard to believe he’s 45.

    As for his 19 year old…ew. I can’t possibly see what they’d have in common. He must be paying her well!

  42. minx says:

    Repulsive. She’ll dump him in the near future.

  43. Blackbetty says:

    I keep wondering what her parents are thinking also

  44. Kim says:

    Good job, old man, getting a child to date you.

    Ew.

  45. Helena qs says:

    David Duchovny (57) is also dating a girl that is 24 and was litterally in diapers when he was hot with The X Files. Rumor has it that he pays her bills and she lives in his place in Malibu – just like this sad excuse of a comedian. I think these dudes need serious help with their middle age crisis.