Dina and Ali Lohan at the Georgia Rule premiere on 5/8/07. I just thought this photo was funny. Thanks to WENN

Dina and Ali Lohan were on “The View” this morning to promote their new E! reality show, “Living Lohan,” which premieres tonight. They both repeated the mantra they’ve been using for the show all along: that they’re a normal family, that they’re using the show to dispel rumors about them, and that Ali just wants to be a singer without all the drama from the tabloids.

Ali said she’s not scared that doing the show might interfere with her life. As for having a hard time due to the show, she said “they trash me now, and I’m only 14. They said I got a nose job and that isn’t true.” She also said that Lindsay helps her make decisions about her fame: “My sister has definitely helped me, and she’s told me what to do and what not to do.”

Dina defended Lindsay using the same argument she always does, saying “She’s 21 and people forget how we were when we were 21. And unfortunately she had to go through so much publicly, and you don’t ask for that.”

Dina says she doesn’t party with Lindsay and that she’s targeted because she’s a woman
Joy Behar asked Dina about her bad reputation. “You have a reputation in the tabloids and maybe you want to clear some things up today. One of the things they say is that you and Lindsay were going out partying together. That when she was having a hard time with her personal stuff you were not there for her.”

Dina answered “That’s absolutely not true. I manage her and there are dads that are managers, I won’t mention names, in the business… she would have an event at a club and they would say I’m at a club, which is completely not true. I think they target women more than they do men unfortunately. It’s a man’s world. I was targeted and I was going through a lot publicly with the divorce and people just start rumors. I know who I am and trust me, I don’t party. I would rather go to dinner with everyone in this audience than with a 21 year-old.”

Just last year, Dina Lohan admitted that she loved partying and admitted lying to celebrities about being Lindsay’s mom
In an interview with Harper’s Bazaar last year, Dina said “If you can button it and clip it when you’re in your 40s, you’re going out” and then put her hand up to get a high five from the reporter. She also told a story about how she lied to George Clooney and told him she was Lindsay’s assistant because she didn’t want to admit to being her mom. She said “I don’t want them to know I’m her mom. It’s a whole ‘nother demographic. People just go dark.” How is that a fabricated story by the tabloids or people targeting her because she’s a woman? Dina said it herself. You can see where Lindsay got her flexible idea of what constitutes the truth.

Here’s the video:

14 year-old Ali Lohan was on David Letterman last night to promote her new reality show “Living Lohan.” She was cute, well spoken and comfortable on stage although she did wear a lot of makeup for a 14 year-old. She said they’re doing the show “to set the record straight and we’re not just this crazy family, crazy people like to tabloids make us out to be.” She said “we’re just a normal family like any other family in America.”

Dave asked Ali if she was close with Lindsay, and she said “she’s like my best friend.” She refused to say whether Lindsay would make an appearance on the show and said “you’ll have to watch.”

Ali called herself a “singer and actress” and said she’s working on her latest album this summer.

Dave asked Ali if she visits her sister on set, and she said she’s always done that, and “that’s what inspired me to do what she does.” She said when she was three she used to run up to her sister on set when she was filming “Parent Trap” and they had to do a lot of takes because she was always interrupting.

Ali talked about her five dogs, including a puppy that’s a “micro mini Maltese.” They showed what they said was the dog in the green room, but it was just a computer-generated image to make her dog look tiny. Ali said her little Maltese, Buddy, has low blood sugar.

Dave said “getting back to the show will there be a lot of drama, a lot of tension, a lot of fighting, a lto of intrigue?” and Ali said “Yeah, we’re just like a normal family so whatever.”

At the end of the interview, Dave closed by saying “Lindsay Lohan” everyone, and then corrected himself. It seemed to me like it was a mistake and not a planned joke. It’s a telling slip, considering how much Ali says she wants to be like her sister. Maybe Ali can pick up Lindsay’s career where she dropped it on the floor when she got distracted by vodka and overpriced purses.

The videos are below and there’s also one of an Access Hollywood interview with Dina and Ali. Dina Lohan is a piece of work and it’s surprising how normal Ali seems.

Here’s the part where Dave calls Ali “Lindsay”

And here’s the full interview:

And an interview on “Showbiz Tonight” with Ali and Dina Lohan. Dina sure seems defensive and snotty.

Those Lohan women really have it rough. Lindsay’s getting sued right and left, Dina’s reality show Living Lohan is being widely panned (and by that I mean I’m assuming it’s going to suck so let’s just go ahead and say that) and Ali, the littlest Lohan girl (yet oddly the oldest looking of the three) is being mocked at school.

“A little while ago … a couple of girls in school made up a video of me and put it up on YouTube,” Ali – whose E! reality show, Living Lohan with manager-mom Dina, debuts on Memorial Day – tells PEOPLE exclusively. “They used disgusting words. Like if my mom ever heard me say that stuff, I’d be grounded for life! … They’re disgusting kids. I got really aggravated.”

School authorities were notified, the 14-year-old adds, “and [the students] got suspended.” Such problems are a thing of the past, now that the eighth-grader is being home-schooled (to accommodate her work and travel schedule). “You learn so much more – it’s just hard to focus when girls are giving you problems,” she says. “No one’s talking about you behind your back. It’s definitely easier.”

She may have a famous sister – and a burgeoning career of her own – but, Ali says, that’s not what makes her a target. “I don’t think it’s just because of my sister and who she is,” she insists. “I think it happens to all the other girls out there, because girls are just mean. It doesn’t happen with guys. When I asked [my little brother] Cody, he was like, ‘No, Guys don’t care!’ “

[From People]

Though I’m not inclined to be sympathetic towards any Lohan, simply as a matter of principle, being a teenager can’t be fun these days. There are so many more public ways to be mocked. When I was a senior in high school, two former friends wrote mean things about me in all the bathrooms. Yeah, classic. Unfortunately they were things that implied I was slutty – and they wrote them in the women’s restrooms. Yeah they weren’t the smartest girls, to say the least. I can only imagine how much it can suck to be a teenager now. Between MySpace and YouTube, you can really get hammered.

Obviously Ali Lohan would be a pretty big target. I’m sure being Lindsay Lohan’s little sister doesn’t help things, but Ali’s right, this happens to a lot of teenage girls. Maybe she should borrow a page from Mean Girls and feed them a bunch of fattening diet bars. Or go all Carrie on them. That’s probably a better movie to draw from.

Photos of Ali and Dina at a youth center in Harlem where they were shooting scenes for Livin’ Lohan on March 28th. Dina broke out dancing. We obviously haven’t seen the episode yet, but it looks positively mortifying. And I actually picked the least stupid photo of Dina. God I hate that mouth of hers. Images thanks to Splash.

One good thing seems to have come out of the Dina Lohan school of parenting: the entire world is now aware of exactly why it’s a bad idea to try to be your kid’s friend instead of their parent. Very pregnant Jessica Alba gave an interview to People magazine in which she talked about the downsides of pregnancy, and what kind of mom she plans on being.

Now I never really saw Jessica Alba as the couchie-coo pushover type filled with sweetness and light, or someone who would really care about getting anyone’s approval of her parenting skills. Certainly not her own kid’s. And it turns out I’m right, because Jessica says she won’t be her daughter’s friend.

Until Jessica Alba and fiancé Cash Warren’s baby girl arrives this summer, the pregnant actress is stopping to smell the roses – though she’s aware of the serious challenges she’ll soon face.

“At the end of the day I am so tired I can’t function or speak and my eyes glaze over,” Alba, 27, tells Fit Pregnancy magazine for its June/July issue, “but this pregnancy has seriously mellowed me out, which is nice. I’ve been going, going, going for so long, it feels nice not to take things so seriously.”

And though she finds herself craving citrus products during her pregnancy, when it comes to what she’ll allow as a mother, she says: “I don’t want to be my child’s best friend; I want to be a mom. But I do want my child to come to me when they have problems and need to talk, so it’s going to be about treading that line.”

[From People]

Thank you, Dina Lohan. Okay to be fair, Jessica Alba never credits/blames Dina for her parenting philosophy, but I’m pretty sure there’s a direct correlation. Most people seem to know that they shouldn’t be their kid’s friend, but the desire for approval (or in Lohan’s case, the desire to act like a moron/reclaim her lost youth/act like a moron) sometimes got in the way.

But now there’s this famous wreck – Lindsay Lohan – that we can all look to as a guide for how we don’t want our kids to be. Anytime anyone has a parenting decision, they can ask themselves, “What would Dina Lohan do?” And then do the exact opposite. As long as Jessica Alba sticks with that, she’ll be a pretty good parent.

Here’s Jessica Alba leaving Champagne restaurant after picking up some take-out food on April 10th. Images thanks to WENN.

E! Networks has a new preview available for Lindsay’s mom Dina’s upcoming reality show, Living Lohan.

The preview is filled with such cringe-inducing and cliché statements as “A lion protects her cubs,” and “It’s a big game of chess and it’s our move. Bring it on now, let’s go.”

Dina is shown discovering the still from older daughter Lindsay’s alleged sex tape with ex Calum Best that turned out to be two different people entirely. 14 year-old Ali comes in the room, smiling and gaping at the computer monitor. Dina then makes some phone calls threatening someone about the photo that’s supposed to be Lindsay, saying “you need to get it down immediately because I’ve already been in touch with my attorneys, and the story is absolutely false.”

Dina says “there’s got to be boundaries with these people, the paparazzi and everything. There’s just got to be more boundaries set.” That’s rich coming from a woman who is letting cameras into her two younger children’s life!

As for 14 year-old Ali, who says she wants to be just like her older sister, Lindsay, Dina claims “Ali loves this business, and unfortunately I have to manage her.”

Unfortunately you have to let the whole world know exactly how you’re messing up your two other kids, Dina, but that doesn’t mean we have to watch it.

The NY Post has more details of the first episode, which sounds like it shows Dina in just as accurate a light as you expect:

The pilot episode, called “Mommy Will Fix It,” centers around the family’s North Merrick, LI, McMansion.

See Dina buffer her family from rumor, protect Ali’s music taste from execs, and help Ali cope with her music producer Jeremy Greene, who is rumored to be dating big sis Lindsay.

“You’re not here to please anyone but you as an artist,” she says to Ali during a conference call with music execs.

In her daily news search for all things Lohan, Dina, 45, says she’s looking for “idiots who are talking trash.”

“I don’t live my life every day going, ‘Oh, they’re talking about us,’ ” Dina snaps. “I’m over it. Yes, it still does hurt, but people are just idiots.”

“Oh God, everyone’s talking about Lindsay’s intervention,” she mimics in a valley-girl voice. “This is so stupid. They better not talk about Ali like this, or there’s going to be war. I’m like a lion with her cubs…”

[From The NY Post]

The real bombshell is this tidbit at the end of The Post’s story, though, which claims that Dina went partying, leaving Ali, 14, and Cody, 11, at home alone when a fire broke out in the house! This is the first I’ve heard of it, so if it’s true it was likely a small fire that they were able to contain and keep from reaching the press. It’s unclear from this story when this happened exactly or if it will be included in the show.

And mom’s right there with the bad girls - leaving the kids at home to carouse at a party thrown in her honor, only to discover that her Long Island house had caught fire with her children asleep inside, says a source close to the family.

When the family hits Las Vegas to record Ali’s first album, Dina meets with Hefner at the Palms and allegedly “allows herself to have a little fun” during a dinner with magician Lance Burton.

[From The NY Post]

That’s awful although the kids are surely ok if this is all we’re hearing about it. Do you think the house fire inspired Dina to hire a babysitter or stay home with her kids more?

Dina Lohan and Ali Lohan, 14, are shown at Candies Foundation ‘Event To Prevent’ Benefit on 5/7/08, thanks to WENN.

Those rumors about Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson being lovers just won’t go away. The pair have been friends for several years, and gossip about the two of them has been around for almost as long. Dina and Ali Lohan just gave an interview to Extra, in which they’re asked about Lindsay’s lady-loving proclivities.

White Oprah and her 35-year-old daughter, Ali Lohan, are making the rounds whoring out their new reality show. Extra asked Ali and White Oprah about the rumors that HoHan is bumping vagina lips with Samantha Ronson.

Ali said, “They’re best friends. They’re just friends. It’s pathetic what people say.” Lezzzz be friends. Best friends with benefits! Friends who happen to eat each other’s coochie cats. You get the picture.

White Oprah responded, “It’s so silly. We actually laugh about it now. It really hurts, but you develop a thick skin. You have to ignore it.” A thick skin thanks to layers and layers of fake tanning grease!

Denials! You can’t deny the heat between Ronson and HoHan. That’s from some weird STD, but there’s still heat between them!

[From Dlisted]

That’s obviously not exactly the official transcript, but Michael K does a much better job summing it up than any line-by-line interview ever could. At one point the Extra interviewer asks Dina about her relationship with ex-husband Michael Lohan, and Dina’s publicist is heard trying to cut the interview. Dina is actually remarkably gracious (at least in comparison) and says she doesn’t want to talk about him. Here’s a clip of the interview, thanks to RedLasso.

Here at Celebitchy, we laughed our asses off at Dina Lohan being named a Top Mom by some Long Island housewife association. Apparently, Michael Lohan doesn’t share our sense of humor- in fact, the whole thing has him pissed off and ranting to the media, talking trash about his ex-wife and her mothering skills. Oh yeah, he went there.

Michael fumed, “Are you kidding! Top celebrity mom? Look at her off-screen antics, her lack of morals and how she conducts herself. I guess they forgot to mention how this top super-mom leaves her kids alone at night and even parties in their presence. Just wait until we go back to court.

“She comes stumbling out of Butter at 3:15 a.m. with bloodshot eyes and a red runny nose, yelling ‘Oh, [bleep],’ when she saw the paparazzi,” Michael raged to Page Six.

He also ranted that his ex missed their weekly family therapy appointment in order to attend the award ceremony Tuesday night in Bethpage, LI.

But Dina responded to Michael’s remarks by calling him “infantile.”

“He’s a loose cannon,” she declared. “We speak to a therapist once a week and I’m not required to be there. My kids want me there, so I go. Obviously with our [TV] show and the event, [daughter] Ali and I reschedule.

“I’ve allowed him visitation once a week, so I don’t understand why he’s doing this. He’s jealous that I got the award. He even called the organizers and tried to talk them out of giving it to me.”

[From Page Six]

In typical Dina Lohan fashion, she goes on to say that the last time their rapidly aging starlet daughter Lindsay was in town, she had to hire extra security to keep her father at arm’s length, and that she believes Michael will violate the restraining order she has on him. Notice that she never directly addresses his claims about her bad parenting- instead, she deflects that and paints herself as a victim. You see where Blohan learned that shit? As for Michael, everyone knows he’s just seething with jealousy over the media attention his ex-wife gets. From the accounts I’ve read, his parenting is just as questionable. If ANY of the Lohan kids make it to adulthood without a criminal record, a sex tape, or an addiction of some kind, it will be a miracle.

Note by Celebitchy: Michael Lohan is shown with his girlfriend, who looks a little like his daughter when she was pretty, outside the Waverly Inn on 3/10/08. Thanks to WENN.

Dina Lohan has four children with her ex husband. Her eldest daughter Lindsay has been in rehab three times without success, has two drunk driving arrests, multiple car accidents, is facing several different lawsuits and is alleged to have stolen items from friends and acquaintances. Lindsay is all of 21 years old.

Dina Lohan’s other kids include singer Ali, 14, who says she wants to be just like Lindsay. Ali appears with her mom on an upcoming reality show on E! to air at the end of this month.

Dina has made a lot of excuses for her daughter Lindsay’s behavior, saying that a lot of it is due to the environment she’s in and that “she’s from an addictive personality genetically.”

Both Ali Lohan and Lindsay Lohan were signed with the Ford modeling agency at the age of three. Dina says in general “I was in the business, and I’m going to help them. You don’t like that? I’m living the American dream.” Maybe you can assume that applies to toddlers modeling as well.

As for how Dina was in “the business,” she claims to have been a Rockette and to have done work on Broadway, but unless she was on the stage crew none of those claims are true. She was found to have fabricated most all of her show business past.

So it’s amusing and probably a publicity ploy on the organization’s part that a Long Island mother’s association, “Mingling Moms” has declared Dina Lohan one of the top 20 mothers on Long Island. You think they would invest some money in their website before honoring Dina, but there’s no accounting for taste. You can find thousands of moms in any city on Long Island that are more qualified than Dina Lohan to win this award. It’s a stunt that doesn’t really put the “Mingling Moms” in a positive light.

Newsday points out that every celebrity mom, like Alec Balwin’s mom, Jerry Seinfeld’s mom, and Howard Stern’s mom, were honored but only Dina came in person to accept her award. The head of the group says that Lindsay’s DUIs are not Dina’s fault and that “she should be given a break.”

[Quotes from E! Online, unlinked details from Wikipedia. Photos from WENN.]

Countdown to drunken, paparazzi-courting, promiscuous shopaholic behavior justified by a massive sense of entitlement: Ali Lohan is about to appear in a film. The 14 year-old younger sister of Lindsay will play a role that’s similar to the teen characters her sister was known for before she got so much publicity for making out with various men and posing naked to support the arts.

The little Lohan also has a quote that makes you rub your eyes and hope she has enough sense to give herself the guidance she surely won’t get from her mother: she says she wants to “do what [Lindsay] does”:

Ali Lohan, Lindsay’s 14-year-old sister, has begun filming her first film project, Mostly Ghostly, in Los Angeles, PEOPLE has learned exclusively.

Ali’s role shares similarities with her older sister’s character in the 2004 film Mean Girls: She’ll play “a popular high school senior” in the film, says a source.

Ali told Teen Vogue in the April issue, “I grew up watching Lindsay. It made me want to do what she does. Just the whole vibe. Being there, being on camera, or onstage.”

The film, slated for release later this year, is based on the pre-teen book series Mostly Ghostly written by R.L. Stine, which centers on an 11-year-old boy who befriends two ghosts.

[From People.com]

I guess I shouldn’t really care about these people, but you can see the future for this girl and water bottles filled with vodka will be the least of her problems. She’s just 14, and you want to take her aside and give her some advice and a scholarship to a remote boarding school, but there’s only so much you can do. She wants to be like her older sister, but she can’t see that everyone is pointing and laughing at her sister, saying she looks and sounds like an old lady. Get emancipated from Dina, Ali, and stay away from your sister. You can carve out a meaningful life on your own terms, if only you realized how trapped you really are.

Ali Lohan is shown at a “youth center in Harlem where she was shooting scenes for the Livin’ Lohan reality show” on 3/27/08, thanks to Splash.

Well the Lohan family is back to not getting along, slamming each other in the press, and the traditional suing of former partners. Just like a family should be. For a little while, the crazy bunch seemed to have made some sort of amends with each other. Lindsay’s dad Michael visited her in rehab and supposedly the two reconciled. From then on, Michael – a born-again Christian, ex-con, and rehab counselor – and Dina stopped slamming each other quite so hard in the press. Michael said he was excited for Dina’s new, presumably crap reality show on E! “Living Lohan.”

Now everyone’s back to fighting again, all because Lindsay - and her siblings - haven’t bothered to see their injured grandmother since she got in a serious car accident on Easter.

“I gave her [Dina Lohan] the family house, all the furniture and the $200,000 she owed me just so that I could see my kids and have a relationship with them,” Lohan told The News. “But after I gave her everything she wanted, she made it hard as hell for me to see my children. Even though my father is dying and my mother was in a car accident on Easter, my parents still haven’t seen my children.

“[Dina] told me, ‘It’s up to the kids if they want to see their grandparents.’ But she’s made no effort to put them in touch or make this happen. That is the bottom line. My mother, Marilyn Lohan, was medevacked by helicopter to the hospital on Easter Sunday after hitting a telephone poll and tree. Thank God, she’s okay, but the car was totaled. Every window blew out.

“My father went into heart failure again yesterday - and yet not one of the kids has seen him.” Michael says he’s also suing his ex over her upcoming reality show, “Living Lohan,” slotted to air this summer on the E! channel. “It’s the exact same show I pitched. She even used my title.” The born-again Christian, who works as a rehab counselor on Long Island, concludes:”I would never get back together with her. She’s bent on an evil path.”

[From The Daily News]

Dina Lohan bent on an evil path? Orange Oprah? No way. That woman has nothing but her children’s best interests at heart. Wow, I laughed so hard typing that I thought I was going to knock the computer over. It seems like the worse her parents get, the more Lindsay drinks and shoots and snorts. And unfortunately for Michael Lohan, Dina can’t make Lindsay see her grandma, as she’s no longer a minor.

After Dina started blabbing to the press about her “Living Lohan” show, Michael – seemingly jealous of the attention – started blabbing to the press about just how happy he was for Dina and younger daughter Ali, who will also star in the show. He told everyone just how much he was filled with positive, loving, happy thoughts for them. Now it’s back to lawsuits. Something tells me season two of “Living Lohan” will involve all three Lohan children sharing a room at a rehab facility.

Here’s Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson having a laugh- and Lindsay holding a suspicious bottle - as they get in a car after leaving Foxtail restaurant on Thursday. Images thanks to WENN.