Over the holidays, we discussed Paris Hilton’s reemergence as a cover girl – she did a photo shoot for Vanity Fair Spain, and for whatever reason, the whole thing made me nostalgic for a simpler time in the gossip universe. Like, remember when Paris Hilton was sort-of important? Remember when everyone had an opinion on her? Once we let just a minor twinge of “Hey, I remember her. I wonder what she’s up to?” in, prepare yourselves. Because now Paris seems to be actively trying to win us back. She covers the February issue of FHM UK, and the interview is… gross. She name-drops Prince Harry and Prince William, and pretends like they party together. For real?

Taking your clothes off in front of the camera isn’t something normally associated with the Royals. But when you’re the heiress of a billion dollar empire – anything goes. And Paris Hilton has stripped off for the front cover of FHM in the same breath as praising Prince William and brother Harry for being ‘gentleman’.

The socialite was celebrating her return to the magazine, six years after first posing for the cover. Speaking of her love of London, Paris said: ‘I love the vibe, the people, the accent… British guys are really different to the guys in America – they’re all such gentlemen and they’re far more mature. It’s just a different mindset. I’ve met a lot of nice British guys, I think the way that your parents raise you is a lot different, because you’re so polite and sweet. British guys are really hot.’

She then spoke of her friendship with the famous brothers, saying: ‘They’re both very nice boys. When I was in London shooting a show for a few months, we went out a couple of times and I found them to be just such nice gentlemen.’

The blonde bombshell looks typically trim and cutesy in a series of seductive poses; modelling heart speckled nightwear in one image and going topless in another with just locks covering her modesty.

Paris, 30, also revealed she is planning to release a house album his summer, saying: ‘I have a huge passion for house music. It always has been my passion. I just haven’t been able to focus on it, because I have been doing reality TV for so long now.’

She added: ‘I’ve been working on the album with lots of other top DJs for a while now and I think people will be really surprised. It’s very modern and very catchy; perfect party music. There are just so many great DJs right now. And I should know, I’ve been to over 100 raves in the past year, so I’ve heard every type of music.’

She also spoke about her varying entrepreneurial skills and self-made businesses.

‘I’m involved in my products every step of the way. My fragrances are doing really well at the moment. They’ve produced more than $1.3billion in revenue since 2005. I have 35 stores and 17 product lines. And then there’s my racing team, my 14 fragrances and my new project, the Paris Hilton Beach Club chain. The first one is opening in the Philippines soon. It’s going to have nightclubs, restaurants, bars, gyms, everything really.’

[From The Mail]

UGH. Now I remember why everyone hated her. She’s terrible. What’s with all of the bragging? Is she trying to tell us, “Look, I’m still relevant! These people are my fans, why aren’t you?” That ship has sailed. As for the bit about William and Harry… I found this story from 2008 about Paris, Harry and William partying together in London, although there are different versions of the story. Some say that Will and Harry carefully avoided Paris, some say that they were all partying in the same group. Still – it was 2008. In 2009, there were rumors that Harry might have wanted a date with Paris after he had broken up with Chelsy Davy too. Is it wrong that I think that Paris might be Harry’s type? That boy loves trashy blondes. I can’t see William being down with it, but who knows.

Photos courtesy of FHM UK.

Depressing news for anyone who likes India, or is Indian, or has a passing interest in India: Paris Hilton has infected Mumbai. Apparently, Paris was invited on a multi-day holiday (working holiday) to Mumbai, where she made an appearance at a mall, went to a party in her honor, and unveiled her new purse line. I guess it makes sense for American non-celebrities like Paris to attempt a platform, a fan base, in a huge potential market like India. It’s the same as a celebrity shilling their stuff in China. But I’m still disappointed that India let Paris Hilton in. Not only that, Mumbai businesses seemed to welcome her with open arms. Personally, I think the businesses should have held out for a Kardashian if they really wanted a famewhore “celebrity”. (Full disclosure: I’m half-Indian by the way, and my dad is living in Calcutta/Kolkata right now, so Paris’s stench might have already reached him.)

Anyway, these are some photos from Paris’s trip. The outfit that really interested me is the faux-sari she wore to her purse launch. Look at this thing! I had no idea that it was possible to make a sari look trashy and whorey, but there you go. The traditional sari is loose, just a long sheet of fabric tied in a special way. Paris’s sari is all trashed up with a built-in bustier, and the whole thing… just, NO. I suppose I could give her some credit for doing her own twist on a traditional Indian dress, and maybe she did it to be respectful and honor her host country. Or maybe she just whored up an elegant traditional dress that’s been around for centuries.

Oh, and here she is doing the “Namaste” hand pose. In between sticking out her boobs and motioning to them. BITCH, please.

Photos courtesy of Fame.

Note: I’m not sure if this is Petra’s wedding gown or party gown. This is probably one of several.

Petra Ecclestone is a British heiress who puts Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian’s excesses to shame. She recently bought Candy Spellings insane estate, the largest mansion in L.A. County, for $85 million and will split her time between living there and in her 6-story $90 million home in London. Petra is all of 22 years old and is the daughter of Formula One billionaire Bernie Ecclestone.

Petra just married in a lavish ceremony outside Rome at the same castle where Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise married. The bash is said to have cost her (daddy) $6.5 million and featured $6,500 bottles of wine (per bottle, not case), and performances by the Black Eyed Peas, Eric Clapton, Andrea Bocelli and a string section from the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra. Over $150,000 worth of fireworks lit up the night sky during the party. It sounds like it cost much more than just $6.5 million. Guests included Duchess Fergie and her daughters, Princess Beatrice and Eugenie, and Paris and Nicky Hilton.

Croatian English heiress and socialite, Petra Ecclestone, who recently dropped $85 million (!) on Candy Spelling’s mansion, swapped vows Saturday with businessman James Stunt in a lavish three-day affair right outside of Rome, according to People.

The 22-year-old daughter of billionaire Formula 1 racing CEO Bernie Ecclestone said I-do to Stunt at the castle where Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes tied the knot in 2006 (Castello Orsini-Odescalchi), with the bride reportedly walking down the aisle in a custom $130,000 Vera Wang gown.

And then there was the reception, where Andrea Bocelli, Eric Clapton and the Black Eyed Peas put on a show for guests like Paris and Nicky Hilton, Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie and Sarah Ferguson as they sipped Chateau Petrus wine (which retails for $6,500 a bottle).

A source tells E! that after the Black Eyed Peas performed, Fergie pulled bride Petra, Paris and Nicky Hilton up on stage to dance. After that, David Guetta deejayed for two hours, and the Hilton girls were reportedly loving all the attention from the billionaire dudes in attendance.

“No one had ever seen anything like it. Everything was done to perfection with no expense spared,” a source gushed to E! Online. “It was the wedding of the century fit for a princess!”

Prior to the big day, guests were treated to a pre-wedding dinner at uber-posh hotel Villa Aurelia, where they dined on caviar, calamari, spinach ravioli and lamb chops, sipped Cristal champagne and enjoyed a performance by Alicia Keys, according to the Daily Mirror.

“It was the most fantastic setting,” a party attendee told the Mirror. “Our menus were customized mirrors with our names etched into them. It was easily the most ­decadent pre-wedding dinner any of us had been to. Then Alicia came on and sang all of her hits. She began with ‘Empire State of Mind’ and everybody was singing along. We couldn’t believe it–it was magical.”

[From E! Online]

You can see photos of the guests here, on Radar and The Daily Mail. There’s also aphoto of Petra on her wedding day, but you can’t really see her $130,000 Vera Wang dress. (I’m not sure whether the header photo is of her actual wedding dress, or if that’s the party dress.) Her makeup looks as heavy-handed and cheap as it usually does.

While I was looking up background for this story, I came across this interview with Petra from late last month that I missed. She reminds me even more of Paris Hilton when she speaks, and it’s easy to see how she’s friends with Paris. It’s all about how hard she works and while I don’t doubt that she may show up at a job during the day, it’s clear she has no clue how she comes across.

When asked why she bought Candy’s house, Petra explained “I wanted to have an amazing home where hopefully in the future I will be raising a family.” On if it crossed her mind that she could have built affordable housing for 1,000 families instead of buying that home, she answered “I help as much as I can but at the end of the day, however much the house has costed, that’s not going to kind of I dunno, like change the world I don’t think…

“I’m not going to not live in a certain way just because there are people less fortunate than I am.”

In terms of her then-upcoming wedding, she described it as “as low key as I can be. I try.” She added “I’m not spoilt, I’m priviledged. I think that’s a huge difference.” Not to the rest of us looking in from the outside there’s not.

This is Petra’s sister, Tamara, 27.

Duchess Fergie

Princess Eugenie

And this is Elisabetta Gregoraci. She’s “an Italian fashion model and TV personality.”

Photo credit: WENN.com and Kika Press/Pacific Coast News

Our collective prayers have been answered — Paris Hilton’s career in reality television is basically over now. After all of that hard work and difficult posturing, it turns out that Paris has now fully achieved total irrelevance. Following a torturous season that’s been plagued with terrible ratings (which Paris tried to blame on the network), Oxygen has decided that “The World According to Paris” will not be renewed for a second season. Let us celebrate together:

This summer saw the debut of two new celebreality series featuring well-known female stars: Oxygen’s The World According to Paris and Lifetime’s Roseanne’s Nuts. Paris Hilton and Roseanne Barr are very different personalities, but their shows both struck out with viewers. Hilton’s series was pretty much dead on arrival, earning barely 400,000 viewers for its June debut and sinking even lower in subsequent airings. The network isn’t officially commenting on its fate, but Vulture can exclusively report what’s been obvious to even the most amateur ratings watcher for weeks: Oxygen has no plans for a second season of “The World According to Paris,” unscripted industry insiders familiar with the situation confirm.

It premiered to respectable but not particularly good numbers, with about 1.5 million folks watching Barr and her family putz around on a nut farm. More people watched repeats of “Pawn Stars” on Lifetime the night Roseanne debuted, which turned out to be an omen: In subsequent weeks, viewership dropped well below a million viewers. Indeed, the most recent episode, airing on August 10, attracted a mere 764,000 viewers. Another ominous sign: Lifetime preempted Roseanne last week, subbing in a repeat of “Dance Moms.” We thought this might be a sign that Lifetime wanted to experiment with different programming in the 9 p.m. Wednesday slot normally occupied by Roseanne, or that it was hoping to boost viewership for the 10 p.m. original of Dance Moms. But nope, Lifetime says there was absolutely no strategy behind the last-second shift: “It was a program delivery issue,” a network spokesman e-mailed Vulture, noting it will air as scheduled this week. That’s usually code for, “The producers couldn’t get the episode done in time,” but since the Lifetime rep didn’t elaborate, we’ll just let “program delivery issue” speak for itself. In any case, with Roseanne having experienced a 50 percent drop in viewership since its premiere, it would seem that its chances for a second season are about the same as “The World According to Paris.” For now, however, Lifetime is maintaining its happiness with the show: “No decision on season two yet but we are happy with its performance this season,” the network rep said.

[From NY Mag Vulture Blog]

So three times as many people tuned in for the premiere of “Rosanne’s Nuts” than for Paris’ show? That’s pretty abysmal, and the ratings only grew worse as the season progressed. Meanwhile, Paris must be livid at the inexplicable success of her ex-BFF, Kim Kardashian, whose family is essentially dominating the E! programming schedule. Naturally, this also extends to the impending four hour wedding spectacular special for which Kim K. will allegedly pocket $17.0 million for all of the associated goodies. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if Paris has a row of Kardashian-themed voodoo dolls set up in a special room at her tacky mansion, but really, Paris should look at the bright side of her latest show’s cancellation. Now she’ll have lots more free time for fishing, violin playing, and skydiving! And shopping and clubbing too.

Photos courtesy of Fame

For those who are still raging over the Casey Anthony “not guilty” verdict that was delivered last month by a Floridian jury, a slight bit of catharsis (albeit no further justice) can be had in the news that Anthony has been voted to the top of a “Top 10 Most Hated People” poll. Of course this news will do nothing to settle the unrest aimed at the Anthony jurors, who fortunately have been spared the same dubious honor. C’mon, they were really only doing their jobs. Anyway and because I don’t want to freshly stir that pot, let’s get on with the rest of the list, shall we?

What do Casey Anthony, Spencer Pratt and Jon Gosselin have in common? A new poll suggests they’re the most hated people in America!

These public figures top findings by Nielsen subsidiary E-Poll Market Research, the New York Post reports. Joining them are famous names such as O.J. Simpson, Paris Hilton and ‘Octomom’ Nadya Suleman, all making way on the following top 10 list:

1. Casey Anthony
2. Spencer Pratt
3. Octomom
4. O.J. Simpson
5. Jon Gosselin
6. Levi Johnston
7. Jesse James
8. Paris Hilton
9. Heidi Fleiss
10. Howard Stern

“A lot of the folks on this list are people who are constantly in the news and have nonredeeming qualities,” Mary Ann Farrell, Senior Vice President of Research at E-Poll, says.

[From Hollywood Life]

Okay, I completely understand why Anthony and Simpson are on this list because they’re basically cut out of the same legally-scandalous grain. Also truly reprehensible are Spencer Pratt (and his extremely expensive crystals) and Nadya “Octomom” Suleman because she’s a drain on the taxpayers and acts like such an entitled bitch concerning her own womb. People don’t like Levi Johnston because he’s a reprehensible, deadbeat famewhore and Jesse James because he cheated on and humiliated Sandra Bullock. Naturally, Paris Hilton’s entrance on this list is rather self-explanatory. As to Howard Stern, he loves to be hated, so he’ll probably feel like he accomplished something today. However, do people still care at all about Jon Gosselin or Heidi Fleiss? Their inclusion makes me wonder whether or not the company presented people with a list and asked them to pick which ones they hated the most instead of asking people to name their own suggestions. Pollsters can be so shady like that.

Photos courtesy of WENN

Over the past week, I’ve been seeing stuff about Linnocent and how she has been kicking it old-school with the Hilton sisters, like it’s 2006 all over again. Apparently, Linnocent and Paris are BFFs once again. Let’s see… a crackhead drama queen and worthless famewhore moron. Match made in heaven! I’m not even going to pretend that one of them is better than the other. They are completely equal, in my mind. Anyway, we don’t have any of the new photos, but you can see some of the photo sets here and here.

So, what do Linnocent and Paris do while they hang out? Drink mint tea with their book club? Of course not. They go out and they get wasted. Guess which firecrotch still can’t hold her liquor and falls down as soon as she’s forced to stand up?

Lindsay Lohan seems to have become a non-stop party animal. For the third day in a row, the troubled starlet partied down in Malibu with her new BFF (and former enemy) Paris Hilton.

Saturday night’s bash became Sunday morning’s, and Lindsay didn’t leave until 4 AM!

Lindsay very definitely didn’t want to be seen when she left Paris’ rented beach pad.
She pulled her hoodie up over her head, and when she got into the passenger seat of the car driving her home, she completely bent over in an effort to obscure her face.

Lindsay is still on probation for her theft and DUI convictions and has no prohibitions against partying, but it was only 10 days ago that Judge Stephanie Sautner warned her to “go back to community service and your life will be in order.”

The no-nonsense justice added that she’ll accept “no excuses” from Lindsay for not completing her counseling and community service requirements within the required time.

“No excuses” would probably include partying like a rock star.

[From Radar]

Of course that isn’t the end of the story – Linnocent had to tweet her crack denial on Twitter, of course. Guess what?! IT’S NOT HER FAULT. I know, shocking. Bitch fell down because she was blinded. And because she was pushed. And because she tripped!

[From Linnocent’s Twitter]

I wish her brain wasn’t fried from years of drug and alcohol abuse so she could come up with some original crack denials.

By the way, is anyone wondering why Paris and Linnocent buried the hatchet? No? Too bad. A source tells E! News, “Paris has known Lindsay since she was 15 years old. The girls have had their falling-outs in the past, but they’ve put that all behind them. They feel that life is short and they’re adults and have been friends way too long to let go.” Of course, the source also didn’t see Linnocent drink anything, so God knows.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

A few days ago, a useless cokehead dumbass walked out of a Good Morning America interview in a huff. Paris Hilton got her thong in disarrays after ABC correspondent Dan Harris questioned Paris about her irrelevance, citing the Kardashians’ fame as an example of how Paris has been overshadowed in the famewhore game. Paris looked off camera (to her publicist, it seems) and then she got up in a huff, temporarily leaving the interview. She later returned and finished the segment. Now TooFab reports that Paris is all whiny about it, and she thinks she was “ambushed”. Seriously.

Paris Hilton is upset with ABC and correspondent Dan Harris for airing an “Good Morning America” interview that went awry, a source close to the situation tells TooFab exclusively.

The 30-year-old reality TV star walked off set because Harris deviated from the agreed-upon (and very serious) topic of stalking, the source says.

The source says Hilton invited Harris and his camera crew into her home to talk about the recent string of celebrity stalkings. Hilton’s alleged stalker, James Rainford, was recently arrested and charged with attacking her then-boyfriend Cy Waits in April and stalking her outside her home in July.

“Do you worry sometimes that people that have followed in your footsteps like Kim Kardashian are overshadowing you?” Harris asked.

“No, not at all,” Hilton responded.

“Do you worry about your moment having passed?” Harris pressed on, at which point Hilton audibly scoffed and left her chair.

The source says that particular question set Hilton off because just moments prior, Harris had gone on and on about the success (to the tune of $1 billion) of her fragrance lines and merchandising. “It’s ridiculous that he went on an on about her making a billion dollars, and then asking if she’s relevant,” the source added. “She is upset. She felt ambushed.”

The source adds that Hilton resumed the interview after ABC told her they were cutting out the part where she walked away, but they did not. The source also says Hilton feels Harris did this only to get publicity for himself, which he’s now accomplished.

[From Too Fab]

Absolutely. Ridiculous. Paris Hilton was doing a sit-down interview which was being pre-taped (it’s not like this junk was live!), and she was trying to promote her failing reality show which no one cares about. The only way she gets attention anymore is by getting arrested, hooking up with someone major, or being absolutely idiotic (see this post). Instead of being smart enough to say, “Well, I think my multiple successful business interests speak for themselves,” Paris showed her ass and let everyone know that she actually is THAT irrelevant, and she knows it too.

By the way, don’t you love that Paris is calling Dan Harris a famewhore? That’s what she’s saying – “He’s only famous because he asked me a mean question!” It’s called being a half-decent journalist, for the love of God.

Photos courtesy of Fame.

Do you remember how Paris Hilton is pretty much irrelevant now? Yeah. Her reality show, The World According to Paris, bombed out, ratings-wise. Her photos rarely make the blogs and tabloids anymore. No one gives a crap that she dumped her meathead boyfriend, and we only barely care that she’s now dating a pretty successful director, Todd Phillips. But in Paris’s mind, she’s still hot stuff. She’s still the Grand Dame of Useless Famewhore Dumbasses. Paris does not realize that she’s been replaced. She’s mostly been replaced by an assortment of Snookis, OctoMoms and Kardashians, basically anyone with no shame, narcissism and a red carpet. Anyway, when Paris sat down for an interview with Good Morning America, Paris was asked about her irrelevance and she got all pissy and walked out of the interview. This is the question that set her off: “Do you ever worry about your moment having passed?” Here’s the video:

When she came back, Paris said: “I’ve been in this business for 15 years now, so it’s been a very long time. Just like any other business person or someone in the industry, it’s always important to reinvent yourself and come up with new projects.” LMAO at “I’ve been in this business for 15 years” - WTF? What business?!? Fifteen years ago she was what? 16 years old, and dancing on tables, drunk off her ass. That’s how she first got noticed too.

By the way, I think it’s official now that Paris Hilton and the Kardashians just flat-out hate each other now. Last year, there were several stories about Kim being a bitch to Paris and Paris bad-mouthing Kim. Now Paris is too stupid to even pretend that she’s not filled with rage and jealousy over the Kardashians’ success.

Photos courtesy of Fame & WENN.

Paris Hilton must be desperate to get us to watch the tail end of her flailing reality show, The World According to Paris. Either that and/or she’s trying to make her very recent ex boyfriend, Cy Waits, think she’s moved on already. Paris has been spotted out with Hangover director Todd Phillips. In case the club makeout pictures on TMZ weren’t enough to convince us, she arranged a pappable moment with Phillips, who looked kind of annoyed to see that their outing was being photographed.

It must be love! Paris Hilton and Todd Phillips have now been spotted together THREE times!

The unlikely pair began showing up together almost immediately after Paris confirmed she’d split from longtime boyfriend Cy Waits.

She was caught kissing The Hangover producer/director at a nightclub on Thursday, and Sunday the new pair was out for lunch in Malibu.

Paris & Kathy Hilton Have A Mom & Daughter Dinner Out – See The Photos

Phillips has several films in development, including Hangover 3. Don’t be surprised if Paris pops up in one of them.

[From Radar]

I hope Radar is wrong and that Paris doesn’t get cameos in any of his films. She could play herself I guess, but it’s not like she has a fraction of Diddy or Mike Tyson’s acting ability or charisma.

I’m not buying this relationship. Paris dates pretty boys like Doug Reinhardt, Alex Vaggo, Stavros Niarchos III, Paris Latsis and Cy. She did declare her love for Benji Madden, though, so maybe she likes to mix it up when she needs the publicity.

In other news about Paris, her stalker was arrested outside her Malibu beach house on Monday. This was the same guy who attacked her then-boyfriend, Cy Waits, outside a court hearing for another stalker/intruder in April. I think the problem here is that Paris is just way too easy to find.

Here’s Todd Phillips without his shades. He’s much better looking here.

Photo credit: Fame Pictures and WENN

Paris Hilton’s new reality show, The World According to Paris, premiered on the Oxygen network last week. It was a “ratings bomb,” according to multiple reports and got just 409,000 viewers. Reality TV World explains that those are low ratings “even by the women’s cable network’s fairly modest standards,” and adds that by comparison Aubrey O’Day’s reality show got 704,000 views for its premiere episode.

What’s more is that Paris has pulled out of promoting the show. She cancelled a bunch of scheduled press appearances, not that they would have made any difference, after Barbara Walters called her to task on The View last week. Barbara and Whoopi questioned why Paris hasn’t done any charity work and why she’s doing a reality show yet again, and Paris got defensive but handled herself well. (You can watch that video here if you’re in the US.) It was too much for her, though, and she couldn’t be bothered to show up for anything after that. This explains why Paris’ cat-faced mom, Kathy, was on The Today Show alone yesterday to do an interview about the show. Do you think the Kardashians would ditch a morning television appearance like that? Of course none of this is Paris’ fault, and it’s not due to the public’s lack of interest in her. It’s all the network’s fault:

“Paris is furious that the show didn’t premiere at the time it was supposed to,” an insider tells me when speaking about ‘The World According to Paris.’ “She worked her tail off doing promotion and publicity for the show and then because of a technical mistake, the show aired at a completely different time in a lot of markets.”

A representative from the network denies that there were any glitches in her premiere episode.

“The show premiered at 10 p.m. on Wednesday, June 1 as was promoted,” an Oxygen spokesperson told me in a statement. “There were no technical mistakes. We look forward to a very exciting run of the series.”

This week’s episode brings together Paris and Charlie Sheen’s ex, Brooke Mueller, whose ongoing substance abuse struggles will be addressed. The rep said this week’s episode with feature Brooke’s “cry for help.”

Her busy week of promotion also included a rough interview on ‘The View,’ where Barbara Walters and Whoopi Goldberg grilled the socialite on the frivolity of her show. She reportedly flipped out backstage and got into a shouting match with a producer. In short, it was a disaster and she canceled events because of it.

“Paris’ second season on that MTV show where she found a new friend was a disaster and she hasn’t been able to sell a magazine cover since the Kardashians arrived,” a TV insider tells me. “If the numbers remain less then the 400,000 that tuned in last week she could get pulled off the air.”

By comparison, the March debut of singer Aubrey O’Day’s show drew 724,000, and 1.7 million viewers tuned in for the premiere of the most recent installment of ‘The Bad Girls Club.’

“This could be the last nail in the coffin,” a senior marketing manager tells me. “She has been replaced by Teen Moms and Snooki. She would have been better off not doing a new reality show at all then doing one that proves no one cares.”

[From Popeater]

I agree with Whoopi and Barbara. Paris is a twit. If her life is so great and she’s got so many businesses going why is she doing reality TV again? I know, she wants to show that she can compete with the Kardashians and the Jersey Shore kids. Only she can’t, she’s old news, and she’s never matured beyond the party girl doing drugs and dropping racist slurs that we saw in those “Paris Exposed” videos. This is her life, and she doesn’t have a lot to offer. We’ve all known this for some time. It’s Paris who will never get it.