Here’s a photo of Courtney Love trashed out of her mind while exiting the Chateau Marmont on 1/13 because she always keeps it classy. That’s just a precursor for this warning to brace yourselves, for there’s a new “tell all” book about Courtney (aptly titled Courtney Comes Clean) that has been penned by The Fix and is based upon a year’s worth of in-person, phone, and e-mail correspondence with Love, most of which she probably doesn’t even remember.

The book goes into depth about Courtney’s struggles with addiction, her issues with men, and more on the money troubles that we’ve heard so much about already. Below, I’ve included some excerpts wherein Courtney blames a lot of her own crap on other people, including such celebrities as Winona Ryder and Andy Dick, but the book also apparently includes call-outs aimed towards Tom Cruise, Sean Penn, Scarlett Johansson, Kirstie Alley, Harvey Weinstein, Madonna, Oliver Stone, Brett Ratner, and Clive Owen. What could she possibly have against Clive Owen? Obviously, Courtney has tried (and possibly succeeded) to smash with both Stone and Ratner, but Clive wouldn’t give her the time of day. Maybe that’s what she’s upset about, but who knows? Only Courtney, and she’s probably already forgotten. Here are those excerpts:

On her “sobriety”: “I think of myself as sober,” she says, although she admits that her daily regimen of pills wouldn’t pass muster at an AA meeting. “When you’re used to heroin and cocaine, a few pills doesn’t seem like the end of the world. As they say in AA, it’s about progress, not perfection. I mean, abstinence is a nice idea, but I don’t know if it’s right for everyone. Especially for someone who was nursed on a steady diet of Valium and Ritalin from the time I was seven, thanks to my fine mother. I don’t do street drugs anymore. My medications are all legally prescribed by prominent physicians. I’m entirely legal. But the truth is, I’ve never claimed to be anyone’s role model. I’m not Mother Theresa. All I’m trying to do is stay alive.”

On losing it at Pam Anderson’s roast: “That Roast wasn’t a great moment for me. I was doped and dazed, and had lipstick smeared all over my face. I may have even been drooling. But it was all Andy Dick’s fault. He handed me a fat pill right before the show and said, ‘Courtney, here, take this–it’s like Vicodin without the aspirin.’ Winona Ryder slipped me a similar pill a few years ago. I’m such an addict that I just swallowed them both, without asking what they were. So thanks to Andy Dick, I ended up getting addicted to benzos again, which went on to plague my life.”

She’s tight with Sam Lufti:
 Love has dismissed many loyal staffers in recent years, including Marie Walsh Dixon, a veteran associate who decamped to work for Frances Bean. Other employees are suing her for unpaid wages. In their place, she has turned increasingly to Sam “Osama” Lutfi, a 37-year-old sober coach who has played an increasingly prominent role in her day-to-day affairs. A swarthy Svengali who once allegedly worked as a private investigator, Lutfi first rose to prominence in 2007 while representing Britney Spears during her much-publicized breakdown. Lutfi insists he has no formal relationship with Love, whom he describes as a friend.

She’s not a Chelsea Handler fan: “I may not like what you stand for, but I do believe in sisterhood,” she [told] Handler, who had recently taken up with Love’s ex-boyfriend, hotelier Andre Balazs. “You don’t want to put gratitude in the hands of a man who doesn’t accept you for who you are and never, ever will…No one in New York City, not even Trump, is despised more! I’m here to serve! Get help and work on your addiction/trauma, Chelsea! The kids call what you’re doing fame-whoring. [Y]ou’re too dumb to get it! Yes I know he’s telling you to take the high road and I’m telling you to take the f&#@ing high road you low-life. GO 2 REHAB!”

Inspector Courtney on fraud: In 2008, Courtney complained to the press that various corrupt lawyers and accountants had cheated her out of $250 million. By 2010, the figure had ballooned to $1 billion. In her quest to unmask the alleged thefts, she engaged a “twitter army” of volunteers who took to the Internet and examined property records to track down suspicious leads. But while some of those volunteers have backed up her claims of fraud, her distractions and failure to pay her employees have stood in the way of real progress.

The crack really helped too: “The strange thing is, while the crack screwed me up in a lot of ways, it improved me in certain others. I’ve never been good with numbers, but when I was on crack I could do math really, really well. I became a f&#@king whiz at calculus.”

Oh wait, Courtney screwed herself: “Shortly after Kurt’s death, the lawyer who was representing me called and said, ‘Courtney, you have over $7 million coming to you, but you need to give me your Social Security number.’ [I couldn't] remember my Social Security Number, so I had to lie and make one up. My mother, saint that she is, had a million husbands. My brothers and sisters were adopted by one stepfather, then by another. Thank God I was emancipated when I was 15, but ever since then I’ve wandered through life wondering who the fuck I am: Courtney Michelle Rodriguez? Courtney Michelle Menelli? Courtney Love? Courtney Cobain? It’s like, I don’t even know my f&#@ing name! How am I expected to know my Social Security number?”

[From The Fix]

That part about the social security number is particularly interesting because it illustrates that Courtney has dug her own financial hole from the very moment that Kurt Cobain died, and if she’s hanging with Sam Lufti, Courtney is just begging to get ripped off in the future. Of course, Courtney probably thinks that Sam is just “misunderstood” just like she is, but I find it amusing that he is the one trying to downplay their relationship. When Sam Lufti doesn’t want to be professionally associated with you, well, you catch my drift.

The Fix also includes a lot of excerpts on its website about Francis Bean’s deposition that resulted in her emancipation from Courtney. Francis alleges that Courtney took drugs “for as long as I can remember” and often fell asleep while smoking, which lead to her nearly burning the house down on three separate occasions. Francis also claimed that her cat was killed by Courtney’s hoarding habit and that her dog died after ingesting some of Courtney’s pill stash. At one point, Francis also had to deal with talking her mother out of jumping from a balcony, and she grew understandably weary of listening to Courtney rage about fraud on a consistent basis. For us, it was exhausting just to read Courtney’s fraud-related rants on Twitter, but Francis was apparently dealing with a bunch of screaming and paranoia about it in real life. Poor Francis — thank goodness she got away from that mess of a mother.

Courtney Comes Clean is available for download here.

Here’s photos from Courtney with tweaked lips last July at a Valentino-associated museum launch party.

Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News and WENN

Once again, the battle of who will control Britney Spears has come to the forefront, and the reprehensible Sam Lufti is back and refuses to go away until he either gets one of two things: (1) Britney back under his control; or (2) A very tidy sum of cash. Either way, it’s all about money for Lufti, and (inexplicably) his defamation case against Lynne Spears still lingers in the appeals court dockets. For his part, Lufti’s claiming that he was the one who pulled Britney off her crazy tour, which is true in a sense because once she hooked up with Lufti, she stopped running around without wearing pants, but that was only due to the fact that Lufti took away her car keys and kept her at home. In doing so, Lufti’s goal was not to help Britney in any way but only to control her for himself. Years later, Lufti is still throwing a tantrum about the years-long restraining order and supposed damage to his reputation due to statements made within Lynne Spears’ memoir, Through the Storm. So Lufti is pushing the court to allow Britney to testify in his lawsuit:

Ever since Britney Spears shaved her head, got arrested for reckless driving and seemingly lost control of her career, the pop singer’s mental state has been questioned by observers. Her career is now on the upswing once again, with a hit album and a coming tour, but the issue of her mental competence is still pertinent.

Spears’ ex-manager, Sam Lutfi, is pursuing legal claims against the singer’s mother, Lynne Spears, and wants Britney to give a deposition. Britney’s parents, though, are resisting, saying that Britney is mentally incapable of testifying. In a motion filed on Monday at Los Angeles Superior Court, Lutfi asked a judge to order a psychiatric evaluation of the singer to prove that’s not true.

Despite Spears’ comeback, she’s still under the conservatorship of her father, James Parnell Spears, and family lawyer, Andrew Wallet. Both are hesitant to let the singer get too close with Lutfi, who was fired in 2008.

As detailed in Lynne Spears’ memoir, Through the Storm, Lutfi was allegedly a master manipulator who secretly drugged Britney, cut off her communications and mobility, and set himself up as the celebrity’s “gatekeeper” before he was fired.

Lutfi says those things aren’t true. He claims that Britney’s life was already a mess before he got involved. He’s suing for defamation, and last November, an appeals court refused to toss the lawsuit. So the battle rages on.

The ex-manager now wants Britney to give her side of the story, but her conservators don’t want that.

In turn, Lutfi points to a recent MTV documentary about the singer, a coming world tour, and an interview conducted with Britney by Ryan Seacrest in March as circumstantial evidence that the singer has got her wits about her again.

[From Hollywood Reporter]

Well, we’re all pretty aware that all of Britney’s appearances and interviews are so highly orchestrated (to the point of enraging talk show host Carson Daly, who refused to allow the Spears camp to edit what would have already been a pre-taped interview), so it’s hard to believe that any court would be unable to see that Britney can only parrot back pre-rehearsed responses. Again, it’s rather terrifying that the appeals court has yet to dispense with Lufti’s case because any declaration that Britney is mentally fit to testify in court could also be used as a foundation to attack the conservatorship that has kept her out of trouble and reunited her with her sons.

As sad as it is to think about it, Britney will always be under lock and key in a sense; at least when her father and lawyer are in charge, Britney gets to see her sons and can continue being a somewhat productive (albeit so heavily medicated that she can only perform the most lazily choreographed of moves) member of society. Of course, there’s always the argument that Britney just wants her hot dergs and could really do without this next worldwide tour, but the alternative to that is … life with Sam Lufti. Because if and when Britney’s conservatorship ever ends, she’ll quickly fall in again with Lufti and soon be wearing that crazy pink wig. And we all know what that means.

Photos Britney at this weekend’s KIIS FM’s 2011 Wango Tango concert courtesy of WENN

Britney and Sam Lutfi in December, 2007
Mystery lawyer Jon Eardley, who claims he has been hired by Britney Spears to contest her father’s conservatorship in federal court, has been smacked down by Federal Court Judge Phillip Gutierrez. TMZ is reporting that the lawyer’s filing earlier this week, in which he claims that Britney’s civil rights are being violated as long as Jamie Spears is her conservator, is being called “frivolous” and the case will most likely return to California state court by the end of the month.

A Federal judge in the Britney conservatorship case has issued a tentative ruling that the move to make a federal case out of it is ridiculous. Judge Philip Gutierrez set a deadline of February 29 for Britney’s so-called lawyer, Jon Eardley, to explain why on Earth the federal court has any business getting involved in Britney’s mental affairs.

The court said it sure seems the Feds have no jurisdiction to interfere, and unless Eardley can convince the judge to the contrary, the case will go back to State court on Feb 29.

[From TMZ]

Well, since Britney is not able to hire her own counsel under the rules of the conservatorship, I’d say this Federal Judge is being more than reasonable to even read the filing and give Eardley an opportunity to explain his involvement. It’s a good thing I’m not a court judge– I’d be throwing people out on their asses all day long.

In other conservatorship news, camp Jamie Spears believes that Sam Lutfi, rather than Britney, is behind this whole federal case farce. Funny how Lutfi can contact a lawyer, but somehow can’t seem to answer his door to receive that pesky restraining order.

Lawyers for Britney Spears’ conservatorship filed papers yesterday in federal court, asking the court to reject the bid to remove the case from the California Court system.

In the papers, the lawyers claim Britney was in no position to even hire a lawyer for the federal case because she’s not allowed to under the conservatorship order. Attorney Jon Eardley, who filed the federal case, claims Britney hired him.

Lawyers for the conservator also want Eardley to identify everyone with whom he worked to get the federal case filed. It’s real clear the conservators believe Sam Lutfi is behind it, and he’s been restrained from having any contact with Brit.

The conservators’ lawyers also want Eardley to pay attorney’s fees, claiming the federal file is kinda frivolous.

[From TMZ]

Every time there’s another court hearing on Britney’s behalf, I am so glad I don’t live in the state of California. I can’t even imagine how many taxpayer dollars have already been spent on EMT vehicles, ambulances, police escorts and the like. Hopefully this will stay out of federal court as well. Those federal court judges have way more important issues to deal with than stupid Sam Lutfi and his desperate attempt to weasel his way back into Britney’s life.

Header image is of Britney and Sam in December of last year.

It’s truly amazing that Sam Lutfi still has not been served with his restraining order mandating that he stay away from Britney Spears. It was approved two weeks ago, but Sam has managed to stay below the radar, and technically the restraining order isn’t in effect until he’s served. I would imagine that Britney’s parents have hired some pretty good people to get to him, so he must literally not be leaving his house. Britney must be the only thing in his life, if she’s worth all this hassle. And things just keep getting worse for the Svengali: the LAPD’s Major Crimes Division is investigating Lutfi for his admission that he continually drugged Britney.

TMZ is reporting that Lutfi is being investigated by the Major Crimes Division of the LAPD. Brit’s conservators have complained that Sam drugged her as a way of keeping her under his control. Lutfi, of course, could not be reached for comment, however his spokesperson Michael Sands says that he is aware of the investigation.

Britney’s mom, Lynn Spears, gave a signed declaration to the court earlier this month, revealing that the night she arrived at Britney’s house for an intervention, Sam openly detailed to her his method of keeping Britney drugged up. “Sam told Jackie and me that he grinds up Britney’s pills, which were on the counter and included Risperdol and Seroquel. He told us that he puts them in her food and that was the reason she had been quiet for the last three days. He told us that the doctor who is treating her is trying to get her into a sleep induced coma so that they could then give her drugs to ‘heal her brain.’”

Of the investigation, a court insider confirms to OK!–”Yes. He was practicing medicine without a license when he was grinding up a cocktail of prescription pills and putting it in her food. There’s no doubt about that being a felony among other charges.”

[From OK]

Risperdal and Seroquel are antipsychotic drugs that are used in high doses to treat schitophrenia, in lower doses to treat bipolar disorder, and in very small doses to treat insomnia. Seroquel is also used to treat suicidal patients directly after a suicide attempt or if a patient is thought to be seriously contemplating suicide. They both have highly sedating properties on their own – combined they would create quite the zombie. They also have a long list of bizarre (and not uncommon) side effects that could explain some of Britney’s unusual behaviors. She definitely should never have been driving while on both of them. It sounds like Sam wasn’t so much “treating” Britney as he was sedating her.

Sam is also supposedly helping Britney “fight back” against her parents – or at least that’s how E! is putting it. He filed a petition to get Britney’s case moved to federal court, and also stated that she’s being kept from freely associating with her friends, handling her money, driving her car, etc. All those things are true – they’re pretty much the whole point of the conservatorship.

“Sam is at war with Jamie. This is his first strike,” a Spears insider said Friday, explaining that Lutfi feels Britney’s rights were violated because court-appointed attorneys did not investigate the claims her family was making about her condition. Lutfi’s new publicist, Michael Sands, who insists that the case has been transferred, filed the petition this week on behalf of New York attorney Jon Eardley, who is listed in the paperwork as Britney’s counsel.

“Ms. Spears has been denied the right to associate freely with friends. She has been denied the right to make or receive telephone calls. She has been denied the right to operate a motor vehicle…She has been denied the right to receive and send mail,” the petition states. “Additionally she has been denied the right to her finances. She is not allowed to access her money or credit cards. Britney has expressed that she doesn’t want to be under the lock and control of her family,” Sands said Friday. “She wants nothing to do with her father.”

[From E! News]

Michael Sands also insists that Britney’s case has already been transferred to federal court, even though all court sources say that’s not the case. Sam clearly doesn’t like that Britney’s parents are taking charge of her life. It has nothing to do with Britney not being able to freely do what she wishes, it has to do with someone besides Sam being in control of her. Britney’s freedom is the last thing on his mind. Hopefully someone will catch him soon and serve him with the restraining order… and maybe a nice little arrest warrant too.

It’s hard to follow what’s going on with Britney lately, and part of me really doesn’t want to bother, but the main thing is that she was photographed crying and sitting on the curb after her friend Sam Lufti was seen publicly berating her, presumably over her relationship with Adnan. She called Adnan and left a message asking him to come by and help her out, but he could not reach her, presumably because Lufti had turned off her handful of phones. Then Adnan tried to get into Britney’s estate, but the security guard wouldn’t let him in on Lufti’s orders. Cops were called because some of the photographers were rushing the gates. Britney eventually hung out with another photographer instead, and both her parents came over to help her out.

Here’s a good breakdown of what happened, thanks to jughood on ONTD:

-Brit and her manager Sam had a huge fight in a car outside her gated community.
-Brit got out the car, crying, and pleads with the photogs to leave her along. Video can be found on TMZ and x17′s websites. It’s very upsetting footage.
-Flipie, the photog, picks up Brit and drives her to her home, then leaves. Brit calls Adnan saying “Baby, can you come get me?”
-Police show up after photogs try to enter the gated community, and leave a short time later.
-Most surprising news, BRITNEY’S PARENTS SHOW UP. “The scene inside Britney’s home right now is not pretty. Apparently Britney is very emotional and cannot stop crying. Both of her parents — mom Lynne and father Jamie — are with her now.” It was reported earlier today that she had begun communicating with them a little bit.
-Adnan shows up, but gets denied access to her gated community.
-Brit heads off towards Beverly Hills with photog Filipe, goes to Ralph’s grocery store, then meets up with Adnan, and speeds down the freeway….

Updates: Sam Lutfi, Britney’s manager, started an argument with her and the two ended up in a screaming fight. Sam continued to verbally abuse Britney as she sat barefoot on the curb at her Summit home crying holding her dog London.

Britney called Adnan for help and he heard the distress in her voice and drove to the Summit immediately. While outside the gates he was denied access as Sam Lutfi had informed the guards that he was not allowed entry. When Adnan then tried to call Britney it seems that Sam had turned all of her cell phones off…

When Jamie Spears turned up, the guards would not let him in, as Sam Lutfi would not let anyone get near Britney’s house. It was only after photographers standing outside explained the situation and who he was that Jamie was allowed access to The Summit home. He looked extremely distressed.

More details about what went down tonight: Sam screamed “Go f%#* your Paparazzi boyfriend!” before speeding off. A teary eyed Spears sat on the curb holding her Yorkshire terrier ‘London’ and sporting what looked like a red mark on her face. Minutes after, Spears had driven down to her house, paparazzo boyfriend Adnan turned up at the gates of The Summit only to be denied access. The security at the Summit have been ordered by Sam not to let Ghalib in through the gates. Hoards of police arrived, and helicopters circled overhead…

Finalpixx, Adnan’s photog company, just posted “Britney is spending her evening in the company of her parents and Adnan.”

[From ONTD]

The news recently came out that Britney’s hanger-on Sam has three restraining orders against him and a long history of making threats of violence against people. One of his ex friends said that Lufti manipulated him emotionally and made threats against his family. It’s interesting that Sam’s relationship with Britney came to a head right after his was published:

There are at least two other outstanding restraining orders against Lutfi. Documents for both cases demonstrate his violent temper. This third case, however, raises deeper and more chilling questions about Lutfi’s character, and about his relationship with Britney….

Haines says their relationship was not romantic or sexual but that Lutfi was more jealous than a lover. He could be supportive one day and vicious the next, leaving voicemails tracing extremes from “You’re a worthless motherf$#%r” to “I love you, man. I love you to death.” He says that although Lutfi also made some feckless gestures toward an old-fashioned con job—Haines claims Lutfi borrowed about $18,000 that he did not pay back, though Lutfi’s mother finally settled much of the debt—Lutfi reserved most of his energy for emotional blackmail and extortion. “Everybody hates you,” he wrote to Haines, suggesting that Haines should just kill himself: “Seriously, sleeping pills, LOTS of them … ” (Lutfi declined to comment for this story.)

When Haines finally cut the cord, Lutfi humiliated him. He ­e-mailed naked photographs of Haines to his family, friends, colleagues and employer. Then he texted and called incessantly, telling Haines he hoped his sister would be “raped to death,” according to the restraining order. In an e-mail about Haines’s mother (“that Mormon bitch”), Lufti wrote, “I hope Satan devours her flesh and bones,” and said he looked forward to the day when he would “piss on [her] burial.”

[From Blender.com]

TMZ has video of Britney walking around aimlessly and crying as photographers shout questions at her, and it’s disturbing. She looks like she has a welt on the left side of her face but that could be due to crying as it doesn’t appear in other photos later that night.

ONTD has text messages that Lufti supposedly sent Adnan telling him to stay away from her, and given his history you would assume that he’s being controlling, not helpful. US Weekly reports that the fight with Sam was over the fact that he wanted her to see a psychologist and that he was telling her to talk to her mother. That all sounds supportive, but who knows if it went down that way.

One more thing happened last night – it looks like Britney and Adnan had a flat tire after they were finally reunited, as WENN has photos of it and it seems to have taken place later that night, but I could be mistaken. Do you want to start ignoring Britney again until her next major incident? I’m sorry to phrase it like it’s inevitable, and with Britney it’s expected. It’s also hard to tell what warrants reporting as she seems to top herself every day. Maybe she’ll accept her family’s help after this.

Did anyone ever figure out exactly what so called Britney Spears’ “cousin” Alli Sims real relationship to Brit is? There were a lot of accusations that they weren’t really related, and the press has stopped mentioning any familial relationship when discussing Sims. Alli – who hasn’t been seen in a while – says her relationship with Brit is great, and Britney’s doing just fine.

“She does seem happy,” Sims told PEOPLE at Saturday’s Hugo Boss/Glamour Studio Glam suite, of Spears, 26. “I’m sure obviously she’s going through some things, and a lot, right now. That definitely gets to you. I’m not saying that everything is fine,” Sims, 26, says. “Obviously, she’s worried about stuff, like we all are. She’s hanging in there. I’m not worried. She’ll get back. She’ll be fine.”

[From People]

Assuming Britney Spears will be fine is like assuming a St. Bernard is going to come flying through your window. It’s not 100% completely out of the realm of possibility, but the odds of it happening anytime soon are pretty slim. The St. Bernard has to WANT to fly through your window. Everyone else hoping it’ll just magically happen won’t increase the likelihood.

Sims says she and Spears are still really close and absolutely nothing is wrong with their relationship. She even claims she and Brit have never had so much as a tiny fight. Yet she slams Brit’s creepy-ass boyfriend Adnan Ghalib. Would you really do that to someone you were on good terms with?

“He’s been around, what, three weeks?” Sims tells PEOPLE. “I heard about it just from friends who watched it. I don’t really see the point of that. … I only know him from him following us around for eight months. I don’t personally know him. But I don’t like that vibe.”

[From People]

This morning Barbara Walters told “The View” audience that she’d received a call from Sam Lufti, who’s now calling himself Britney’s manager. Lufti told Walters that Britney is in “treatment” for her mental health issues. I was hoping “in” was the operative word there – meaning she had gone to some kind if of facility. But it’s more that she’s seeing a psychiatrist. Which is still great, I was just hoping she was going whole hog.

Barbara Walters received a call from Britney Spears’s manager and “very good friend” Sam Lutfi, the TV host told her cohorts on Monday’s The View – reporting that Lutfi said the pop star was seeking help for what Walters termed “mental issues which are treatable.”

“She has been to a psychiatrist,” Walters, 78, said, recounting Lutfi’s explanation over the phone. “She, I assume, is starting some kind of treatment.” Walters also reported that Spears was having trouble sleeping and was suffering from “mood swings,” but that she was back in touch with her mother, Lynne Spears. When those at the table challenged the veracity of Lutfi’s report, Walters’s response was, “I don’t know if anybody is telling the truth or not telling the truth.” But she noted, “He has been with her constantly. He seems to be enormously supportive.”

[From People]

Hey, Britney Spears getting some sort of treatment is better than nothing. And with her level of crazy, you probably have to take baby steps. Actually that’s not true, with her level of crazy you should be institutionalized. But because Brit’s got money and power, she seems to be able to do whatever she wants. And considering how reticent she’s been to make any positive changes in her life, baby steps towards psychiatric care is a really big deal. Though to be honest, I’m hoping someone gets her into a straight jacket by the end of the week.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Britney Spears at a gas station buying soda after she went to Petco pet store to buy a bird and birdcage with Sam Lutfi. January 20th. Images thanks to WENN.