What shady Xmas gifts did the Cambridges & Sussexes send to each other?

09-03-2020   Commonwealth Day Celebrations  Westminster Abbey 2020...

Considering all of the negative press the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were getting a week ago, they should thank Harry and Meghan for pulling focus, just this once. Prince William and Kate had the one-two punch of an ill-conceived, poorly-executed royal pandemic tour plus an unmasked trip to Pantoland, where they breathed all over essential workers and took credit for the free performance (which they had little to do with). It was just plain old bad decision making from the Cambridges from start to finish, once again showing that, when left to their own devices, they will always come across as tone-deaf. But their shenanigans were forgotten as soon as the Sussexes revealed that they had invested in a latte company, and they had inked a Spotify deal. So, are the Keens grateful? Will they send Harry and Meghan a nice Christmas gift?

Meghan Markle, Prince Harry, Kate Middleton and Prince William are celebrating the season with gift-giving. The Sussex and Cambridge families have been sending each other Christmas presents ahead of the holiday, PEOPLE has learned.

Presents have been sent back and forth between the entire royal family as well as they experience their first socially-distanced Christmas amid the ongoing pandemic.

Meghan and Harry, along with their 19-month-old son Archie, are gearing up to ring in their first holiday season in their new Montecito home in California, and the family is “excited to decorate for Christmas,” a source previously told PEOPLE.

Meanwhile, William and Kate have said they’re still unsure of their Christmas plans after it was announced that Queen Elizabeth had called off her annual trip to Sandringham for the holiday.

[From People]

So, here’s why I wanted to write this story. I wanted to make a list of gifts that I think Harry and Meghan sent Will and Kate. My guesses:

A lifetime subscription to Netflix
A lifetime subscription to Spotify
Two bags of Clevr Blends Oat Milk Lattes
Together: Our Community Cookbook, signed hardcover
Rapid Covid tests
American-made wigs and toupees
Stuffed animals – a moose and a squirrel, perhaps.
Incandescent light bulbs
A bouquet of roses.

And what did William and Kate send Harry and Meghan for Passive-Aggressive Christmas?

A pair of girls’ tights
Homemade chutney
A plastic tiara with an emerald sticker
Incandescent light bulbs
A framed family photo, smashed with a fist
A DVD of a David Attenborough program
A fossil looted by David Attenborough and smuggled out of Malta

The Duchess of Cambridge sits near the Duchess of Sussex as they attend the West

Royals Xmas Day church

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid and WENN.

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76 Responses to “What shady Xmas gifts did the Cambridges & Sussexes send to each other?”

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  1. Pocket Litter says:

    I’d send cannot and willnot a single lump of coal.

  2. CidyKitty(CidySmiley) says:

    I bet if they exchanged anything at all it was gifts for the kids. When my sister and I didn’t get along we still did gift exchange for the kiddos.

    • Sofia says:

      I agree. I think Meghan especially is the type to send cards, wishes and presents to the kids, even if she and the Cambridges don’t get along.

      • Levans says:

        Same! I usually just let my husband buy gifts for his wretched sister and her family.

        I bet Meghan will hand write the card…with no misspelled words…in perfect calligraphy!

      • Thirtynine says:

        I think so, too. Even if Harry and William never really restore their relationship again, the kids are just kids, they are Archie’s cousins, and you can have hope for the next generation.

    • equality says:

      That seems more likely whether they are getting along or not. Most of the media outlets claim the royals only exchange gag gifts and now they turn around with this nonsense. Wasn’t there some big uproar about Diana giving real gifts and it was awkward?

      • Ginger says:

        Last year we got reports from the rota that everyone in the family distanced themselves from Harry and Meghan because they were so awful. Now, we have reports from the rota that the family are super close and they are exchanging Christmas gifts. I don’t buy it. Harry and Meghan will more than likely give gifts to the Cambridge kids but that’s it. The RF now want to be associated with Harry and Meghan because of their success.

    • lucy2 says:

      That’s what I thought too, I’m sure they sent toys for the kids, and that was probably about it.

  3. Iris says:

    This made me cackle. Well played, Kaiser

  4. Wren says:

    A journal for Kates non-existent thoughts?

  5. MattyLove says:

    No copy of Finding Freedom?

    • Amelie says:

      LOL this is my favorite fantasy idea. Harry and Meghan gifting every single member of the BRF (the Queen and Philip included) a copy of Finding Freedom.

  6. Aurora says:

    This sounds like fake news from the Keenbridge camp. I’ve lost count of all the People articles on how Kate is ready to be Queen. People has become the official US mouthpiece for the Royal family.

    • Cecilia says:

      Exactly. Ive said it before. We should prepare ourselves for the “brothers are getting along” articles going into 2021.

      Also people and hellomag canada have become proper mouthpieces for the Americas and it makes me sick

    • Andrew’s Nemesis says:

      I wonder how Old Brenda feels re these hundreds of ‘Queen-ready’ articles. I can’t imagine that she’s particularly pleased – unless she unprims her chapped lips and snickers at the idea of Kate dealing with her red boxes.

    • Steph says:

      Agreed.

    • Amy Bee says:

      There’s an old video of Harry, when he was deployed to Afghanistan, where he talked about Kate’s first pregnancy and that he hoped that press would back off her during that time. He denied a report that he wrote a letter to Kate congratulating her on the baby. So, this gift story could be fake as well. In fact, I believe this story originated from Katie Nicholls so the possibility is high that it’s fake.

      • Agree, Amy Bee —- Probably “fake” news. However, Kaiser’s imagined gift lists are a hoot. Thanks, Kaiser, for starting my day with a laugh.

      • Ginger says:

        Katie Nicholl is pushing the “Will and Harry are BFF’s” narrative HARD. She knows nothing and used to buy her info from hackers. She is pathetic.

    • February-Pisces says:

      Every once in a while KP change tactic and realise that the Keens behaviour towards harry and Meghan might not actually look that good, so they push “there is no rift’ line. But the thing is this ‘soft’ approach only lasts for a minute until Willie needs to throw harry under the bus again. They will be ‘feuding’ again in a day or two.

  7. Sofia says:

    It’s not related to the Sussexes directly but if I were an aristo, I would send the Cambridges a Christmas card with the “Catherine the Great” cover in frame

  8. Harper says:

    Kate gets a Six Wives of Henry the Eighth 1000 piece puzzle. That will keep her and Carole busy and scared over the holidays.

  9. Abby says:

    Hahaha I love this whole post.

  10. Becks1 says:

    If I were H&M I would send the Cambridges several nice pictures of the Sussexes living their best life in California – in front of their huge mansion, in the tea house of said mansion, Harry surfing in the Pacific, etc.

    • BnLurkN4eva says:

      No way, the Bridges would leak those pictures to the press to keep the press off their backs for a bit. The press would create all kinds of narrative surrounding said pictures and be set for the holidays. We want to keep the press hungry not fed and let’s face it new pictures of H/M living their best lives would keep the BM fed well into the new year.

  11. Digital Unicorn says:

    I think you missed out a pre-read of the FULL analysis of the bestest 8 question survey that was EVA created. Meghan will be soo disappointed.

  12. Osty says:

    The sussexes gift to the keens was showing them how to use your platform for good , how to dress as a professional woman , showing them they don’t care about what the keens do . The keens gift to the sussex was asking their cheerleaders to smear them to save their faces after the pandemic Express

  13. SarahCS says:

    I mean clearly this is a fake story and I’m sure there are toys for the kids but that’s probably it. Loving the CB narrative and comments around it though.

    Having said that, my first thought seeing the headline was chutney on the way to California and I would LOVE Meghan to send latte mix back. Please Meghan, be petty, just for us.

  14. Lexistential says:

    This has gotta be from the Keens of Kamp Kambridge. These two losers are going to do their damndest to piggyback on Harry and Meghan’s Archewell press while looking for ways to sabotage them in the UK tabloids.

  15. Andrew’s Nemesis says:

    If I were H&M I’d send them recordings of ‘Puss in Boots’ and ‘The Constant Gardener’.
    But I doubt they’d get the inferences.

    • Dilettante says:

      Another winning comment! This post and the comments are an early a Christmas present for Celebitchies!

  16. Miss617 says:

    I don’t know about the adults or the boys, but I hope Charlotte gets an American Girl Doll, specifically Samantha, the one with an aunt who’s a suffragette, because how else is she going to learn about feminism growing up in the Cambridge household? Also as an added bonus Samantha’s story is anti-child labor (so Charlotte can learn she shouldn’t have to be trotted out for PR) and pro-being kind to the Irish (which is a lesson that definitely needs to be learned in that family!)

    • Watson says:

      @MISS617 YES! LOLOLOLOL!!!

    • Ann says:

      I LOVE this. I always liked Samantha but my two nieces, who grew up when the American Girl dolls first became popular, didn’t because “she was rich,” lol. One got Felicity because they both had red hair, and the other got Kirsten (I think?) because she had blond braids. But they were wrong about Samantha. Samantha was cool. That’s the one I got my daughter six years later. None of us were rich, exactly, but we were certainly fortunate and I thought Samantha taught good lessons about how to use that good fortune and be progressive.

  17. Carrie says:

    Those photos of Kate. Perfect for the role of Mrs Danvers.

  18. Izzy says:

    This entire post and comments is epic shade. I’m here for all of it.

  19. SpankFD says:

    I love this post, but (embarrassing) I missed some of the joke’s references. Googling didn’t help explain the wit in roses, tights, chutney and Attenborough… Could you please explain for the peanut gallery?

    • FancyPants says:

      Rose Hanbury is William’s mistress, Meghan supposedly made Kate cry about the kids in her wedding party not wearing tights, Kate gave the Queen homemade chutney for Xmas one year and QEII supposedly left it out on the table at breakfast the next day like she didn’t want it, and Attenborough recently visited the Cambridges and brought along a controversial fossil gift that was only for Prince George. Whew. Now somebody please fill me in on the incandescent light bulbs joke?

      • Abby says:

        Fancypants, I can’t count how many times it’s been said that William is “Incandescent with rage” over something or other the sussexes have done.

      • FancyPants says:

        Ahhh. I thought it was gonna be something about how they both wear their makeup too heavy and need different lighting… duh it sounds obvious now, thank you!

  20. lucy2 says:

    “A framed family photo, smashed with a fist”

    Or a beautifully framed photo of Will, Kate, and Harry, with Meghan cropped out. “Sorry, the proportions of the frame, we couldn’t fit everyone in.”

  21. PureJane says:

    Kaiser! I’m dead, thanks!

  22. Lisa B says:

    I laughed so much reading this. So needed that today, thank you!!!

  23. Coco says:

    Meghan and Harry sent Kate another red coat, since that’s the only thing she wears.

    • Call_me_al says:

      Yes, what is the deal? Kaiser, you should do some kind of un-style retrospective of Kate’s coatdresses. She must have at least 10 of red, 20 blue, 10 green, 20 black, and 20 other.

  24. Laugh or Cry says:

    I wouldn’t trust any gifts fearing it will be bugged. Thanks but no thanks…

  25. Jumpingthesnark says:

    Sussexes can send the Cambs some cloth masks.

  26. Liz version 700 says:

    This article and thread are perfection. Lol.

  27. LittlePenguin says:

    You are all feeling pretty snarky this morning and I am here for it!

    I saw a 1000 piece button puzzle the other day and I would hope H&M sent that to Kate!

  28. Keen Kate says:

    Harry sent William that photo of Rose in a bikini, posing next to Tony Blair and Meghan sent me a signed photo of Sir Ben Ainslie. I keep it under my pillow (next to my voodoo doll of Lady Georgie Thompson).

  29. Valiantly Varnished says:

    If H&M REALLY wanted to be shady they would send them a beautiful painting of…ROSES

  30. Mia says:

    Lmao Kaiser 🤣😂

    Realistically they probably sent something for the kids and something bland and inoffensive like Tiffany & Co. crystal wineglasses or porcelain teacups.

    Didnt the new editor of People work for Daily Mail before?

  31. SomeChick says:

    Kate has major resting judgy face in that pic.

  32. Jay says:

    Because I’m petty af, I would buy Kate and William a jumbo box of masks for their next tour to infect…er, uplift…the nation.

    I’d buy them from the NHS charity page, so I’d also likely be doing more fundraising than either of the Cambridges for their newest patronage.

    The oat milk lattes I’d gift to the former employee who now has the unenviable task of polishinging the Cambridge social media presence with a little note of appreciation for alllllllll the hard work.

  33. Alexandria says:

    Excuse me, one should be Keen first so the Sussexes should send a survey to the Cambridges first to find out what they want for PAC.

    Upon completion, they can redeem cups labelled Top CEO and Top Statesman on them.

  34. Implicit says:

    LOL

  35. The Recluse says:

    If I were Harry and Meghan I would also send them a Krampus ornament, just to mess with them.