South Park’s recent “Fishsticks” episode caused Kanye’s ego to deflate, and has now apparently ruffled Eva Longoria’s feathers. In the episode, which is about a joke involving fishsticks, Carlos Mencia goes on Conan O’Brien and claims credit for the joke. After the episode aired, Mencia twittered that he thought it was “hysterical”: “They just made fun of me on South Park. I thought it was hysterical. Catch the rerun.” After seeing the episode, Eva Longoria is reportedly livid over the impersonation of Mencia, calling it racist.

Eva Longoria is furious with South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Apparently, she is a big fan of comedian Carlos Mencia and thinks that the portrayal of him, seen recently on the Fishticks episode, borders on racism. Eva believes that Carlos Mencia is one of the most talented comedians ever. She is rumored to be telling people that portraying Carlos Mencia as one of the characters on Carlito’s Way is not only stupid; it’s also racist.

[The Examiner]

“Racist” is a strong word, and should not be used lightly. While I see where Eva is coming from, it sounds like she hasn’t seen that many episodes of South Park and probably doesn’t “get it.” The show has make fun of everyone, and I mean everyone. Tom Cruise, P.Diddy, Al Gore, Michael Jackson, even the Pope. Their humor spans across racial, religious, gender, and sexual preference profiles. In short, they’re fair with their scathing commentary.

Eva Longoria has always been proud and vocal about her Mexican ancestry, and racial issues are certainly an important and relevant part of modern society. But where was Eva, a Catholic, when an episode made fun of the Pope?

And not only that, but Mencia liked the episode. His whole schtick is making fun of people of all ethnicities - why isn’t it okay for South Park creators to do the same?

Here’s a clip from the show. It’s somewhat NSFW.

Eva Longoria had some issues revealing too much to the press early in her relationship with now-husband Tony Parker. In early 2006, she said “I’m the teacher [in our relationship], especially about love,” and claimed that Tony was “always telling me he’s never met anyone who loves the way I do - wholly and freely and unconditionally.” She later tried to take it back, reversing it to say that Tony was really the teacher or something, but the damage was done. Parker has since learned her lesson and has been keeping relatively quiet about what goes on behind closed doors in her marriage, although she does hint at problems in a recent interview.

In a talk with Glamour Magazine, Longoria says that she works at her marriage every day and takes it just one day at a time. If you’re happy in your marriage and things are going well, would you say you take it one day at a time? That’s something you use to deal with the prospect of long stretches of time in which you feel deprived of something. Many people would agree with her that marriage is work and say she’s just being realistic about it, but it sounds like more than that to me.

This is the second marriage for the 33 year-old and the first for her husband Tony, 26. Eva was previously married to actor Tyler Christopher from 2002 to 2004.

GLAMOUR: I read once, “Love is the whole history of a woman’s life, but just an episode in a man’s.” Do you think that’s true?

ELP: I don’t know. I believe that men, when they fall, fall harder than women. Women gauge emotions a lot better because we’re more in touch with them, so we’ll give and take as much as we want.

GLAMOUR: How long have you been married?

ELP: A year and a half. But we dated for two and a half years first. We didn’t rush.

GLAMOUR: What was the courtship like?

ELP: Tony is very romantic, full of surprises—he’s the surprise king. But whether it’s a surprise party or a sweet note he leaves in my bag, for me it weighs the same.

GLAMOUR: What’s one thing about marriage that’s harder than you thought it’d be?

ELP: Marriage is a commitment, so you always have to work at it. For us, just juggling schedules is the biggest obstacle we have, and we don’t even really have a problem with that either…

I’m really a very fifties housewife… I love having dinner ready and making sure his clothes are ironed and that he’s packed and ready when he goes on road trips.

[From Glamour.com]

In just the last month, Longoria was photographed with her hand on Russell Crowe’s knee and was seen sitting on Marc Anthony’s lap. Maybe she wouldn’t have to work so hard on her marriage if she would stick closer to her own husband instead of other women’s. Ironically, Longoria also talked to Glamour about breaking the news to girlfriends that their men are cheating on them:

ELP: [talking about friends dating their friends' exes on "Desperate Housewives"] Oh, you never date someone’s ex-boyfriend. Period. That’s not even the unspoken rule—that’s the spoken rule.

GLAMOUR: Is there a statute of limitations on that?

ELP: I don’t know. Luckily, I’ve never been in a situation where I’ve wanted to date one of my friends’ exes.

GLAMOUR: OK, what if you find out your girlfriend’s boyfriend is cheating on her?

ELP: I would tell her. If it were one of my best friends? I would probably take a picture with my camera phone first.

GLAMOUR: What if it’s her husband?

ELP: That’s a trickier one…. It’s tough, because sometimes people kill the messenger. But I think the truth always comes out, regardless of who tells.

[From Glamour.com]

I wonder if Eva did that interview before or after the photos were taken of her with her hand on Russell Crowe’s knee. This woman seems like she’s full of crap to me and I don’t see her marriage lasting that long, no matter how much she tries to play the domestic.

Eva Longoria is shown out shopping with a friend on 12/17/08. Credit: Fame

Eva Longoria didn’t look too happy to be photographed out smoking in Puerto Rico over the weekend. Longoria was attending the wedding of her friend, actress Rosalyn Sanchez, on the Caribbean island.

In Touch points out this week that Eva has lost what little weight she gained for her Desperate Housewives character over the summer. Her trainer says she’s on a high protein diet with only fish and no meat. Maybe smoking helps her cut cravings too. It can help you lose weight, but it comes at a huge cost to your health.

The NY Daily News has an article about smoking celebrities who try and hide it from the public. Katherine Heigl, Britney Spears, and Lindsay Lohan are regularly photographed taking drags, but there are other celebrities who are smokers that we don’t know about. Lauren Conrad is one, and Ashlee Simpson used to smoke before she got pregnant. Famous people are aware that there’s a well deserved stigma associated with smoking and many don’t want to set a bad example for fans and young people.

Smoking is a lot more acceptable in Europe and I have a slightly less negative opinion of the bad habit after living here a few years. It’s definitely something that’s socially influenced, and through legislation the US has helped curb smoking while changing attitudes and saving many people years of their lives. Celebrities know that they’re only looking foolish by lighting up. Eva Longoria generally accomplishes that just by opening her mouth.

Photo Credit: Fame Pictures

How much of a celebrity-obsessive do you have to be to watch 9 hours of Creative Arts Emmys, Emmy pre-show and Primetime Emmys?  About as much as I am, I suppose.

The Creative Arts Emmy broadcast was Saturday night on E! and it was more entertaining than the main broadcast Sunday night.  Sarah Silverman was uncharacteristically adorable, and Neil Patrick Harris and Sarah Chalke were far superior hosts. 

With a total of four straight hours of pre-show on E!, then a three hour show, anyone addicted to celebrities, high fashion and ridiculously expensive accessories, can overdose on any awards night, but for some reason, the Emmys can actually give you a hangover before the show is even over.

“Who are you wearing?”, the most overused phrase on E!, is also the most important question of the night for those that tune in for the dresses, jewels, and shoes (and some of the suits).  The Hills’ Lauren Conrad was, not surprisingly, the first “celebrity” on the red carpet and set the fashion tone for a night: bare shoulders, floor length gowns, and strong colors (aside from Marcia Cross’ flesh colored tutu and Eva Longoria’s keep-the-baby-talk fueled flapper dress).

No one’s hair was bigger than Patrick Dempsey’s, but that’s usually how it is anywhere McDreamy is on the guest list.  Most of the Hollywood women wore their hair down, flowing and wavy, so Tina Fey looked very anti-Palin, but, she said she would be happy to have a drink with the Alaska Governor if she’s free in late November.

Ryan Seacrest gets a lot of grief for his too casual hosting of American Idol, and his questionable production partnerships (Denise Richards?  Paris Hilton?) but he’s in his element in the pre-show kind of atmosphere and does a pretty seamless job.  Plus, he knows exactly what it is that he does.  When Kathy Griffin asked him if it bothered him that Josh Grobin got more tail than him, he told her ”He’s a singer. He’s got talent.  I do nothing but fill time.” 

Less impressive was his turn at an opening bit for the main broadcast.  Helping him, or helping him to hurt the rest of us, in hosting the main show were Heidi Klum, Howie Mandel, Jeff Probst, and Tom Bergeron, all co-hosting and all the first time ever nominees for Best Host of a Reality or Reality-Competition Program.  The show was sometimes painful and at one point Josh Grobin ruined every TV theme song with a vocal montage that anyone ever loved… ever.  Except South Park, he nailed that one.

But then there was Don Rickles!  Don Rickles stole the show!  The guy is abrasive, but he punched some laughs into a dying show, and left Kathy Griffin speechless.  Anyone who can do that deserves an award!  And he was aptly rewarded a few minutes later with his first Emmy for Outstanding Individual Performance in a Variety or Music Program for Mr. Warmth: The Don Rickles Project

My personal picks this year went mostly unrealized, with the happy exceptions of the seven 30 Rock and one each Colbert Report and Daily Show wins.   HBO production John Adams won the year with thirteen statuettes and Mad Men came in one behind 30 Rock with six wins. 

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A COMEDY SERIES
JEREMY PIVEN as Ari Gold Entourage HBO

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY SERIES
JEAN SMART as Regina Newly Samantha Who? ABC

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A DRAMA SERIES
ŽELJKO IVANEK as Ray Fiske Damages FX NETWORKS

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES
DIANNE WIEST as Dr. Gina Toll In Treatment HBO

OUTSTANDING WRITING FOR A VARIETY, MUSIC OR COMEDY PROGRAM
The Colbert Report COMEDY CENTRAL

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTRESS IN A MINISERIES OR A MOVIE
LAURA LINNEY as Abigail Adams John Adams HBO

OUTSTANDING VARIETY, MUSIC OR COMEDY SERIES
THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART COMEDY CENTRAL

OUTSTANDING WRITING FOR A COMEDY SERIES
TINA FEY 30 Rock Cooter NBC

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A MINISERIES OR A MOVIE
TOM WILKINSON as Benjamin Franklin John Adams HBO

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A MINISERIES OR A MOVIE
DAME EILEEN ATKINS as Miss Deborah Jenkyns Cranford (Masterpiece) PBS

OUTSTANDING REALITY-COMPETITION PROGRAM
THE AMAZING RACE CBS

OUTSTANDING MINISERIES
JOHN ADAMS HBO

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTOR IN A MINISERIES OR A MOVIE
PAUL GIAMATTI as John Adams John Adams HBO

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTOR IN A COMEDY SERIES
ALEC BALDWIN as Jack Donaghy 30 Rock NBC

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES
GLENN CLOSE as Patty Hewes Damages FX NETWORKS

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTOR IN A DRAMA SERIES
BRYAN CRANSTON as Walt White Breaking Bad AMC

OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTRESS IN A COMEDY SERIES
TINA FEY as Liz Lemon 30 Rock NBC

OUTSTANDING HOST FOR A REALITY OR REALITY-COMPETITION PROGRAM
JEFF PROBST Survivor CBS

OUTSTANDING COMEDY SERIES
30 ROCK NBC

OUTSTANDING DRAMA SERIES
MAD MEN AMC

The Academy of Television Arts & Sciences 60^th Primetime Emmy® Awards Winners Press Release

Picture note by Celebitchy: Here are some photos from red carpet at the Emmys. Shown in order are: Heidi Klum, Eva Longoria, Lauren Conrad, America Ferrerra, Marcia Cross, Teri Hatcher, Mary Louise Parker, Nicollette Sheridan, Mariska Hargitay, Brooke Shields, Tina Fey, Christina Applegate, Cynthia Nixon, Evangeline Lilly, Felicity Huffman, Patrick Dempsey, Debra Messing, Holly Hunter, Jenna Fischer, Kathy Griffin, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Lara Dern, and Glenn Close.

Eva Longoria was pictured pulling faces and looking foolish at Etoile nightclub in Paris last night with her husband of just over a year, basketball player Tony Parker. Do you think she’s trying to look stupid or that she thinks she’s actually working it?

Star Magazine has a pretty unflattering photo of Eva in their current edition on news stands now. They quote a “weight expert” who estimates she’s gained 15 pounds and says “When you’re tiny-boned like Eva, weight gain shows a lot more quickly than someone who is taller and bigger-boned.” She looks good and I don’t see what the big deal is. As long as she’s wearing form-fitting clothes like she is here you can tell she’s not pregnant as has been rumored. She sure looks dorky, but that has nothing to do with her still-tiny size.

Eva told Hello Magazine in an interview published two weeks ago that she’s still the same dress size and that “Tony loves it” that she’s gained a little weight. She also said that she’s moved into a new house and that Tony helps her feel safe. She complained “When there’s such a bounty for pictures it gets a little scary.” A bounty for pictures of Eva Longoria and Tony Parker? They’re going to have to do a lot more than dance like fools to get the press interested in them. Maybe Longoria can talk more about their sex life like she did last year.

Credit: Fame Pictures

The evidence is really mounting that Eva Longoria Parker is pregnant. First, there are the incessant internet rumors. Which I’m fairly certain can be so powerful that they can actually impregnate you. So keep that in mind when you’re thinking pregnancy thoughts. Second, there’s the bit of weight Longoria has put on in the past few months. Supposedly it’s just because her character on Desperate Housewives has gotten fat… but more often than not when a show does that it’s to disguise a pregnancy. Few starlets will get chubby for the sake of such a mediocre role, and Longoria just doesn’t seem the type to me.

But now there is additional evidence that is about as clear-cut as peeing on a stick: Longoria did not eat any sushi or drink any alcohol this weekend. And we all know that can only be explained by the growing of a tiny person inside your womb.

Eva Longoria Parker certainly knows how to keep the gossips guessing.

On Friday, the actress hit Las Vegas clad in an Empire-waist babydoll dress. She snacked on edamame instead of sushi or anything else raw at the grand opening of Yellowtail Sushi Restaurant and drank only nonalcoholic bevvies.

Later that evening, at Pure nightclub, the Desperate Housewives star sipped Fiji water as Wilmer Valderrama and the Hilton sisters did shots of Patrón.

While she did recently cop to putting on pounds for her character’s storyline, all these signs seem to indicate Eva might be expecting.

Her rep didn’t return a request for comment—so let the bumpwatch continue!

[From E! News]

If I added up all the days I spent not eating raw fish or drinking alcohol I could have given birth to about twenty kids by now. I realize it’s a little unusual, but it’s not an obviously telling combination. There are tons of other legit reasons. I’m guessing she probably is pregnant, but more because of the show suddenly making her character fat. Lack of spicy tuna roll consumption has little to do with it.

Here’s Eva and husband Tony Parker leaving her restaurant Beso on August 19th. Images thanks to WENN.

‘Desperate Housewives’ actress Eva Longoria and her husband, NBA player Tony Parker, are working like mad to get pregnant- according to Mark Cherry, executive producer of Eva’s show. There have been rumors for a couple of months now that Eva was already pregnant, but her reps denied it, saying the petite actress was ordered to put on some weight for her character on the show. But Cherry told Us Weekly that Longoria was inspired by her alter ego, who had twins on the show, to try out motherhood in real life.

Eva Longoria Parker’s boss has spilled the beans!

“Eva is desperately trying to get pregnant with [husband] Tony Parker,” Desperate Housewives’ creator and executive producer Marc Cherry told Us Weekly in its latest issue, on newsstands now.

“After they phone their doctor, she promised me I will be the next call,” he added.

The 33-year-old actress is getting a practice pregnancy run at work.

“Gaby is having a very tough time being the mother of two overweight, hyperactive children,” Cherry revealed of the show’s next season, which advances five years. “But Eva is having a marvelous time playing her!”

[From Us Weekly]

Eva Longoria is annoying, but I bet she’d make an adorable pregnant lady. We will probably hear non-stop stories about the labor and delivery, since Eva just loves to overshare. But if the couple wants a baby, I hope they make one. Good luck to her and Tony. This is the fun part, so enjoy!

Eva Longoria and Tony Parker are shown at the Whaleman Foundation Benefit at Beso on 8/10/08. Credit: AXELLE/BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM; David Gabber / PR Photos

Eva Longoria was spotted out last week wearing a t-shirt with the moronic saying “I Want More Privacy.” It was widely thought to be her response to the near-constant rumors that she’s pregnant. Longoria uses the press whenever she needs some publicity but gets annoyed when it turns against her. She’s gained a small amount of weight and prefers to wear looser clothing, which keeps the pregnancy speculation going. During the writer’s strike she issued a statement that she’d gained ten pounds because she was eating a lot while she was waiting to get back on set. Now she says she gained weight for her character, Gabrielle on Desperate Housewives. She also is sporting the bob hairstyle that is more popular now, and it looks pretty good on her:

According to her personal rep, Eva is reflecting a change in her on-screen character Gabrielle — who goes from her usual sex kitten to an over-worked housewife with kids in season five. “She’s making herself look like that as her character has let herself go. Gabrielle has gained weight and cut her hair,” Liza Anderson tells PEOPLE of Longoria Parker’s character. “She’s a worn out mother with two kids.” Longoria Parker was pictured on a European vacation — notably on a yacht off the coast of Italty — looking minutely larger than normal, prompting the usual rounds of pregnancy rumors. Anderson chalked this slight gain to Gabrielle’s woes. “And even that was not enough. She’s also wearing butt pads and a stomach pad to play the part.” And did Longoria Parker enjoy the method-eating? “This is a lot of fun,” says Anderson, “but as an actress.”

[From People]

I like how People calls it “method eating,” I’m going to use that next time we cover an actor gaining weight for a part. None of the women on Desperate Housewives look like particularly realistic housewives to me considering how well put together they are and how stylishly they dress, but if Eva wants to say she gained weight for the part that’s her prerogative. She needed to gain some weight anyway. She’s still really thin and it looks like whenever she eats something it makes her stomach poof out - probably because she’s not used to eating more than small portions at a time. Eva bugs the crap out of me but she hasn’t given as many annoying interviews lately. That’s another added benefit of her slight weight gain - she wants some “privacy,” which is Eva-code for better press.

Eva Longoria and Tony Parker are shown after having lunch on 7/14/08. Credit: WENN

Mario Lopez, who by some misguided soul at People Magazine just got named their bachelor of the year, says that he would be with Eva Longoria now if they’d ever been single at the same time.

Lopez says, “We never dated. Unfortunately. We met a long time ago, and she was always with somebody or I was with somebody. But we hit it off and I have the utmost respect for her.

“Tony Parker is a lucky guy. I was in (sic) her wedding. I walked her mum down the aisle.”

Contact Music

Now Mario, it might have been that even if you had dated Eva, she still would have met and fallen madly in love with Tony Parker, who happens to be a lot more loaded that you are.

Of course, what also might have happened is you might have split up because you’ve been f***ing a Hooters waitress. Or a singer. Or a wannabe singer that works at Hooters. Which is how his relationship with Dancing with the Stars partner Karina Smirnoff ended.

Or, you might have split up with her two weeks into your marriage, after cheating on her during the week leading up to your wedding. Which is how his marriage to Ali Laundry ended.

This, according to People Magazine, is the best that the male population has to offer. Mario tells the magazine that he is looking for a woman who is ‘modest’, not ‘uppity or affluent’. I think this means he’s looking for a woman who doesn’t stick up for herself and doesn’t publicly call him out on his philandering.

Mario Lopez is shown promoting his fitness book, Mario Lopez’s Knockout Fitness, on 5/15/08 and on Broadway before appearing in A Chorus Line on 6/5/08, thanks to WENN. He is with Eva Longoria in that stunt they pulled for “Pop Fiction” in which he gave her a necklace in front of the paparazzi in March.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie hit the red carpet at Cannes for the premiere of her animated feature Kung Fu Panda. Angelina looks lovely in a low-cut forest green flowing dress that emphasizes her growing assets while Brad is dapper in a suit and tie, short hair and a goatee flecked with gray. The couple looked happy and relaxed, smiling and laughing as they shared a private joke. Ten to one they’re making fun of Eva Longoria’s ridiculous dress. What the hell is that tulle monstrosity she’s wearing? She looks like a figure skater who’s about to whip off the back of her skirt for her next number after her photo op. And look how she’s posed with her arm out at that awkward angle.

Also shown are Natalie Imbruglia looking like a deer in the headlights, Dustin Hoffman, and Lucy Liu. Thanks to WENN for these photos.