Last week, the tabloids were oddly fixated on Katy Perry and John Mayer on the subject of texting. In Touch published a story that Katy has been texting back and forth with ex-husband Russell Brand because “she needs that peace of mind that comes with connecting with someone you loved.” For John’s part, Star went with a story that has him sexting all sorts of chicks behind Katy’s back and that Katy had caught him once, and they fought about it. We didn’t mention these stories at the time because … meh.

Now things are getting slightly more interesting though. Life & Style has heard from one of John’s “friends,” who says that John has had a long-running f*#k buddy since early 2011. And supposedly, John has never stopped seeing this woman even though he and Katy are an official couple. Nobody would be surprised if this story was true, right?

Katy Perry and John Mayer looked “quite affectionate” together on Dec. 12 in NYC while seeing A Christmas Story: The Musical. But looks can be deceiving.

An Insider reveals to Life & Style, on stands now, that John has been seeing a secret woman since early 2011. “They meet frequently, just for sex dates,” confides the insider. “And they sext each other almost constantly.”

While Katy thought John could be the answer to her relationship woes, he’s been playing her from the start. “She’s totally into him,” the pal confesses to Life & Style. “There’s a part of her that thinks she’s definitely reformed him, so she’d be totally devastated if she knew that John was cheating on her.”

The insider continues, “John and this woman have incredible sexual chemistry and have been seeing each other nonstop since their first encounter almost two years ago.”

Katy and John have been spotting together numerous times on various dates since the summer.

[From Life & Style]

I have no problem believing this story. If his reputation is any indication, John probably has issues with monogamy, and since Katy is always attending events and travelling, he’s got plenty of opportunity to get it in elsewhere. I also do think that John likes having a famous girlfriend. Katy is probably (I guess) good for his image, and Katy likes the thought of reforming bad boys. My take on her has always been that Katy goes for unrepentant lotharios because she likes the idea of being the very special snowflake that can “tame” them and make them give up all of those other chicks. Of course, this relationship will end in disaster, but don’t they all?

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet

Year-end lists are due to start pouring in at any moment, and these lists generally mean nothing at all but are fun to talk about from a gossip standpoint. For once, I’m actually not looking forward to the year-end movie lists because I’ve seen very few movies this year that are worth bragging about at all. It’s been a decent year for popcorn flicks though, and it would make me sound very unintelligent to talk about how The Avengers kind of rocked my year, so I won’t go there right now. Even though I just did. Dang.

These are some photos of Katie out and about with Suri in New York City over the past week. Katie’s butt looks pretty cute in these pants, right? Now (the most recent) ex-Mrs. Tom Cruise been named “Best Revenge Body” in the wake of her very dramatic divorce from the Xenu disciple in lifts. God, this list of “Bests” is so incredibly silly, but here we go with some more entries:

Eat your heart out, Tom Cruise.

According to Fitness magazine, Katie Holmes, the Jack Reacher star’s ex-wife, is in possession of the “Best Revenge Body” of the year.

Their reasoning? “This Broadway star and overall badass mama keeps her shape in check with frequent SoulCycle classes,” they explain. “She was even spotted at a class on her 32nd birthday. Now that’s dedication.”

Suri’s newly-single mom, 33, wasn’t the only A-lister recognized by the publication for her impressive physique.

Jennifer Aniston received the honor of “Best Bride-to-Be,” while Homeland’s Claire Danes nabbed “Best Baby Bump.” (FLOTUS Michelle Obama, meanwhile, was named “Best Arms,” and Blake Lively “Best Legs.”)

Newlyweds Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake were deemed the mag’s “Most Fit Couple,” thanks to their shared love of all things sporty.

[From Us Weekly]

Should Katie have won over Katy Perry? Sure, why not. Katy still has the same banging body that she always has (like a cartoon character, basically), but Katie has made some newfound efforts to dress better for her own shape, and she’s a spinning freak too. I think Katie actually has a pretty nice body, and I appreciate that she places a priority upon fitness but also indulges in her cupcakes and Starbucks concoctions as well. Meanwhile, Tom has been spotted “getting revenge” by chatting up a blonde in a nightclub after “inviting a group of young women into the darkened [VIP] section.” Oh, Tom. Katie totally wins this one.

On another note, isn’t it nice to see Suri wearing a coat in frigid NYC? That school uniform is not very practical in the winter though — those poor little legs.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, and WENN

Camille Paglia has stepped away from her ivory tower more and more in recent days by focusing a bit more on pop culture iconography. A few years ago, she took aim at Lady Gaga for not being sexy enough and, instead, coming off “like a gangly marionette or plasticised android” that is “clinical and strangely antiseptic, so stripped of genuine eroticism.” I don’t think these criticisms had much effect on Gaga, who — as annoying as she can be in a famewhore sense and when it comes to her bizarre claims of “art” — doesn’t seem to be striving for sexiness at all. Oddly enough for a feminist, Paglia seems to only care about how erotic a pop star is with very little regard anything else an artist is putting out there in terms of how they live their life off the stage. Even if Gaga’s messages are often self serving, they do have a positive effect on her fans. She’s not all bad, and she’s especially not as bad as Paglia would have us believe.

Now Paglia is taking aim at Taylor Swift and Katy Perry for the Suzy Creamcheese images they project through their recorded music and live performances. Katy Perry sort of deserves the criticism after publicly denouncing feminism last week, but Paglia makes no mention of Katy’s awkward speech, so I am assuming that she either wrote this before Katy inserted foot into overglossed mouth, or she doesn’t care what comes out of Katy’s mouth. Instead, Camille is focusing on the good-girl images of both Swift and Perry as an example of what’s gone wrong with feminism or, if you will, the death of feminism. While I can’t argue much about what Paglia says about Katy’s “good-girl mask over trash and flash,” and Swift’s glitter ponies are generally annoying, there’s a certain hypocrisy that comes into play when Paglia goes on to mention how Rihanna is a stunning example of eroticism and feminism. Say what? Here are the most relevant portion of Paglia’s essay from the Hollywood Reporter:

It’s staggering that [in 2011] 22-year-old Taylor Swift earned $57 million and Katy Perry $45 million. How is it possible that such monumental fortunes could be accumulated by performers whose songs have barely escaped the hackneyed teenybopper genre? But more important, what do the rise and triumph of Swift and Perry tell us about the current image of women in entertainment?

Despite the passage of time since second-wave feminism erupted in the late 1960s, we’ve somehow been thrown back to the demure girly-girl days of the white-bread 1950s. It feels positively nightmarish to survivors like me of that rigidly conformist and man-pleasing era, when girls had to be simple, peppy, cheerful and modest. Doris Day, Debbie Reynolds and Sandra Dee formed the national template — that trinity of blond oppressors!

As if flashed forward by some terrifying time machine, there’s Taylor Swift, America’s latest sweetheart, beaming beatifically in all her winsome 1950s glory from the cover of Parade magazine in the Thanksgiving weekend newspapers. In TV interviews, Swift affects a “golly, gee whiz” persona of cultivated blandness and self-deprecation, which is completely at odds with her shrewd glam dress sense. Indeed, without her mannequin posturing at industry events, it’s doubtful that Swift could have attained her high profile.

Beyond that, Swift has a monotonous vocal style, pitched in a characterless keening soprano and tarted up with snarky spin that is evidently taken for hip by vast multitudes of impressionable young women worldwide. Her themes are mainly complaints about boyfriends, faceless louts who blur in her mind as well as ours. Swift’s meandering, snippy songs make 16-year-old Lesley Gore’s 1963 hit “It’s My Party (And I’ll Cry if I Want to)” seem like a towering masterpiece of social commentary, psychological drama and shapely concision.

Although now 28, Katy Perry is still stuck in wide-eyed teen-queen mode. Especially after the train wreck of her brief marriage to epicene roue Russell Brand, her dazzling smiles are starting to look as artificial as those of the aging, hard-bitten Joan Crawford. Perry’s prolific hit songs, saturating mainstream radio, hammer and yammer mercilessly. She’s like a manic cyborg cheerleader, obliviously whooping it up while her team gets pounded into the mud.

Most striking about Perry, however, is the yawning chasm between her fresh, flawless 1950s girliness, bedecked in cartoonish floral colors, and the overt raunch of her lyrics, with their dissipated party scenes. Perry’s enormous commercial success actually reflects the tensions and anxieties that are afflicting her base audience: nice white girls from comfortable bourgeois homes. The sexual revolution launched by my baby-boom generation has been a mixed blessing for those who came after us. Katy Perry’s schizophrenia — good-girl mask over trash and flash — is a symptom of what has gone wrong.

Authentic sizzling eroticism does appear among the strata of high-earning female celebrities. Rihanna, who earned $53 million last year, was born and raised on Barbados, and her music — even with its chilly overuse of Auto-Tune — has an elemental erotic intensity, a sensuality inspired by the beauty of the Caribbean sun and sea. The stylish Rihanna’s enigmatic dominatrix pose has thrown some critics off. Anyone who follows tabloids like the Daily Mail online, however, has vicariously enjoyed Rihanna’s indolent vacations, where she lustily imbibes, gambols in the waves and lolls with friends of all available genders. She is the pleasure principle incarnate.

The insipid, bleached-out personas of Taylor Swift and Katy Perry cannot be blamed on some eternal law of “bubblegum” music. Connie Francis, with her powerhouse blend of country music and operatic Italian belting, was between 19 and 21 when she made her mammoth hits like “Lipstick on Your Collar” and “Stupid Cupid.” Middle-class white girls will never escape the cookie-cutter tyranny of their airless gh*ttos until the entertainment industry looks into its soul and starts giving them powerful models of mature womanliness.

[From Hollywood Reporter]

Soooo. There’s a lot here that’s worthy of discussion, but why on earth does Paglia find Rihanna to be a stellar example of feminism today? I mean, she’s obviously a fan of RiRi’s boozed-up vacation photos posted to various social media networks. Presumably, Paglia also approves of Rihanna screaming “Don’t you know who I am?” while security threatens to eject her out of nightclubs. Further, Paglia must also know that Rihanna has recently (or not-so recently) returned to the abusive relationship that she shares with Chris Brown. But sure, let’s just let all of that slide since Rihanna displays “authentic sizzling eroticism,” which is way more important to the survival of feminism than, say, refusing to reconcile with a very bad man who punches the hell out of you for sport. Paglia really doesn’t know what she’s talking about anymore, does she?

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet

Here are some photos of Katy Perry in a gawd awful green Yves Saint Laurent gown at the Carole King’s benefit for Paul Newman’s The Painted Turtle Camp. I am assuming that Katy chose a dress in this particular shade of green for the “turtle” motif, but that’s really no excuse for the dress itself. The top looks like an inverted lampshade, and the bottom part is so ill-fitting and sloppy looking. Ah well. It’s better than cotton-candy frou frou.

This story is slightly amusing yet ultimately kind of sad. Even though Katy Perry has reportedly told Rihanna she’s concerned about her on-again relationship with Chris Brown, Rihanna just doesn’t get it. According to a story in this week’s Star, Rihanna is quite irritated because Katy is with John Mayer, who Rihanna allegedly thinks is the worst dude of all time. Now the two (fair-weather?) friends are supposedly feuding as a result of their mutual distaste of each other’s mates:

BFFs Rihanna and Katy Perry are feuding over their men! Rihanna slammed Katy’s man, John Mayer, after Katy dissed Rihanna’s beau, Chris Brown. Read on for all the BFF drama!

We thought nothing could come between these BFFs! Inseparable pals Katy Perry and Rihanna are now feuding over their bad boy boyfriends, according to a new report.

Rihanna is tired of Katy criticizing her for dating Chris Brown, and this time Rihanna is fighting back! A source told Star magazine “She says Katy’s a hypocrite since she’s with John Mayer, who is one of the biggest sleazeballs on the planet!”

Katy and John are rumored to be moving into an L.A. home together, and Rihanna is not happy about it. She is firing back disses at John!

The source assures that RiRi and Katy do care about each other and are just being protective — “They’re really stubborn and both of them are in love with bad boys.”

We certainly hope these two can forgive and forget! Nothing should come between BFFs, even their men! We hope Rihanna and Katy can work this out!

[From Hollywood Life]

This is such a gross story, isn’t it? I mean, if Chris Brown and John Mayer were literally the last dudes on earth, I think I’d make peace with the idea of permanent celibacy in very short order. If forced to make a decision about which of them is less revolting, I guess John Mayer’s David Duke c*ck would win over a woman beater by a slim margin. Hmm, maybe the whole racism thing is why Rihanna doesn’t like John. I guess that makes sense, but I just wish RiRi would wake up and realize that she’s with an even worse man than John Mayer.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

Here are some photos of Katy Perry at the Trevor Live event where she was honored for her efforts against bullying. During her speech, Katy stated, “I hope all LGBTQ youth know that they are as valuable as anyone else, that they are amazing and unique, and make the world a more vibrant place.” Well, at least she said something remotely intelligent and inspiring unlike her recent statements about feminism. So that’s something, I guess. Small steps.

Katy is wearing a beige/flesh-colored Marchesa dress here, and — even though I agree with Kaiser (and nearly everyone who’s witnessed the horror of Marchesa) that the only reason that any starlet wears the label is due to the not-so-subtle encouragement of Harvey Weinstein — this really isn’t such a bad dress in the grand scheme of all of that sparkly, ice-capadey crap that Georgina Chapman designs. This dress is certainly better than the last Marchesa getup that Katy wore; remember, the one that made her look like a jewelry-box ballerina? So terrible. But you know that Katy’s only wearing this dress because Harvey’s going to make her a movie star. Katy looks good here even though she’s probably unnecessarily relying upon her Spanx security blanket. She’s also toned down her usual hair and makeup habits too, which is a somewhat unexpected but quite welcome change. Or perhaps the lighting is just working in her favor.

Anna Kendrick wore a very light blue Georges Chakra dress, which is floaty and flattering at the same time. She looks gorgeous here even if the hair is a bit off.

Zoe Saldana wore a muted pink cocktail dress, and it washed her out completely. At least she’s not looking so frighteningly skinny these days.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

Katy Perry was named Woman of the Year at Friday night’s Billboard Women in Music awards, and she made a pretty strong departure from her recent matronly turn in fashion with a lovely tomato-red Oscar de la Renta dress and silver, peep-toed heels. I’m guessing that, since Katy never mentioned feeling fat (her words, not mine) in her acceptance speech (and I wouldn’t put it past her to say that), Katy had tucked herself into her beloved Spanx, and she looks pretty good here. By that statement, I mean that she’s dressed respectfully for the occasion and neither her boobs nor her booty are hanging out all over the place. Katy wore her hair in an elaborate, braided updo, which was quite flattering, and I’ve included a rear view of the hairdo and dress as well as a photo with Carly Rae “Cinderella for Life” Jepsen, who was named Rising Star, at the bottom of this post.

In the meantime, we’ve already recently heard Carla Bruni’s negative opinion on feminism, and now Katy is chiming in as well. Here are some excerpts from her acceptance speech as (ahem) Woman of the Year:

On feminism: “I am not a feminist, but I do believe in the strength of women.”

Her relationship with fans: “I don’t really like to call myself a role model for my fans. I hope that I am an inspiration for them, especially young women. My mantra, especially for the [Part Of Me] film, was: If you believe in yourself, you can be anything. People don’t want to look up to someone. They want to look at across at someone and say, ‘That’s my girl. She’s singing something I don’t know how to put into words. She’s captured something and became the soundtrack of my life.’ And I know that if I get out of line, my sister back home will whack me across the face – and so will my management.”

On her mom, Mary Hudson: Katy thanked her mother “[f]or keeping my head above water throughout all the 124 shows of the tour and some of the hardest times of my life.”

[From Billboard]

Oh, Katy. I guess now we know why she’s hooked on a misogynist like John Mayer.

Katy’s makeup was relatively low-key compared to her usual look. She’s still wearing a pancake layer, but she’s downplayed the colors, so she looks relatively mature instead of gaudy. A definite step in the right direction.

Carly Rae Jepsen wore a bright blue Rachel Zoe dress with a youngish-looking ruffle detail at the hem. Her gold pumps are Brian Atwood. This girl just doesn’t stand out from the crowd, does she?

Photos courtesy of WENN

Here are some photos (that we never got around to posting) of Katy Perry performing at the America Forward event in October. As you can see, she’s wearing one of her infamous rubber dresses that always make me feel terribly uncomfortable. It’s not the revealing, hugging nature of these dresses themselves that make me cringe, but I just imagine that she must be boiling underneath because her skin can’t breathe. It just can’t be healthy, and Katy probably peels these things off as soon as possible. Or maybe she likes it. Kinky.

Anyway, I’ve always thought that Katy was fortunate enough (or must literally work her ass off) to have the body to wear these outfits in the first place. Not so much, as Katy revealed the other night on the red carpet of the Snowflake Ball. Katy was wearing this semi-transparent dress, which prevented her from indulging in her favorite accessory, Spanx. Then she started talking about how fat she felt at that very moment. It seems like an odd thing to talk about to a journo, right?

Katy Perry has been called “The First Lady of Hot” by Maxim, but she doesn’t always feel worthy of the title.

Us Weekly caught up with the “Part of Me” singer at the Nov. 28 UNICEF Snowflake Ball in New York City, where she and other celebs including Selena Gomez, Uma Thurman, Tony Bennett and Kelly Ripa walked the blue carpet and helped raise money for UNICEF’S lifesaving children’s programs.

The pop star, 28, was stunning in a tight, floor-length, semi-sheer navy Naeem Khan dress with a matching cape, Guiseppi Zanotti heels, a Judith Leiber clutch, and Lorraine Schwartz jewels — but she admitted she didn’t feel as good as others thought she looked.

“I feel like my [fat] is sticking out so bad right now,” she confided in Us at the bash. “I almost always wear [Spanx], but not tonight, and I feel it pushing out, making me look fat.”

“I like to say I run on the elliptical for 30 minutes watching CNN, but I don’t do it often enough,” she added. “So I’m just like, ‘Oh, I guess I’m not fitting into this Lanvin dress for these couple of months.’”

Perry may not always love her curves, but plenty of other people do — including on-again boyfriend John Mayer, who recently accompanied the singer on a romantic tour of the Old Mission in her hometown of Santa Barbara, Calif. The two have also been spotted packing on the PDA at several Hollywood hot spots.

“They were in their own world,” a guest at Perry’s October birthday bash told Us of the couple, who reunited in September after briefly separating in August. “She didn’t even talk to her friends much. It was just her and John. She’s obsessed with him.”

[From Us Weekly]

Even though Katy generally irritates me, I have to admit that it’s refreshing for her to admit to having a little hidden wardrobe help … although she does sort of excuse herself by admitting she’s sometimes too lazy to exercise. Here’s what I want from a celebrity — someone who will admit that they work out all the time and still have some problem areas. Because that’s something that happens in the real world. Even though I run anywhere between 25-30 miles per week (on the treadmill and outside), keep a relatively healthy diet, and am at a target weight, there’s still that sneaky thigh cellulite problem. So yeah, I appreciate that Katy is acknowledging getting some help from Spanx. Does this make me like her just a little bit more? Maybe.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

Here are some photos from last night’s 8th Annual UNICEF Snowflake Ball at Cipriani 42nd Street in NYC. From what I remember of past Snowflake Balls, they usually get a pretty decent turnout, and there are usually some solid A and B-list celebrities. But this year’s Snowflake Ball does feel a little… basic. I mean, I’m happy to see Selena Gomez and Katy Perry in attendance, but surely UNICEF could have gotten a few more “bigger” names? Anyway, I think my favorite of the night was Selena. She wore Dolce & Gabbana… I really like it. It’s occasion-appropriate, it’s flattering, it’s not trashy. I love her hair here too.

Uma Thurman in Atelier Versace… the dress is okay. I get that Uma just had a baby recently and she still wants to be covered up, plus it’s winter and everything… but I think the thick velvet adds weight. A lot of you have asked if Uma is tweaked too – I don’t think so. I think her face looks different because of the baby weight.

Katy Perry in Naeem Khan – I love the color on her and I think the dress (and cape!) overall is a nice choice for the event. My one complaint: Katy needs to stop parting her hair down the middle. It’s not flattering to her face, and it’s just not a great hairstyle for her.

Kelly Ripa looks… eh. I don’t like this dress on her, and I think she’s tweaking. I’m also getting a weird vibe from Mark. Is he over it?

The Bush girls!! Jenna Bush-Hager looks especially busty. Pregnant boobs maybe? Is Dubya about to become a grandpappy?

Matt Lauer and his wife reunited for the red carpet. Ten bucks says they were fighting by the second course.

Photos of WENN.

Last night, Katy Perry was recognized by the Dream Foundation at its annual gala for her efforts to “bring awareness to the importance of lending a hand to dreams that involve children who are facing the impending loss of a parent,” which is nice, and I can’t bag on Katy for being involved with such a cause. Where her fashion sense is concerned, however, Katy is still fair game for mockery. For the gala, she wore a full-length, floral Dolce & Gabbana dress, and the effect is rather underwhelming. Granted, Katy has been attempting to project a more grown-up look these days through a series of more serious (faux-gothy) and somewhat boring gowns. I can appreciate that she’s no longer pulling the fetishy, cotton-candy gimmick with her outfit choices, but the sudden move into more mature territory is off-putting at best.

Overall, this was an appropriate look for a gala, and since there were probably children present at the event, it’s nice that Katy didn’t oversexualize herself by having her rack or butt cheeks hanging out. I don’t really like the heaviness that her new hair extentions lend to her dyed-black hair. Maybe an updo with a few loose, curled tendrils would have been prettier. Her makeup was also typically masklike, but those chunky green earrings are a nice touch and all the more reason for an updo.

Katy’s dress did look better in motion than it did while posing on the red carpet.

Photos courtesy of WENN

Lsst night, Rihanna didn’t really wear a costume as she was named Queen of the West Hollywood Halloween parade, but she ended up holding onto a sparkly magic wand and wearing a rhinestone-encrusted crown, which I guess qualifies as a “fairy queen” outfit. Kind of disappointing, right? We sort of expect Rihanna to go all out with dramatic outfits on most occasions, and here she almost looks like a civilian with a little black dress and pumps. Well, there is one notable thing to mention here — Rihanna’s already ditched the cropped ‘do for extensions. Too bad. Her short hair looked really great.

Katy Perry decided to attend the Hollywood Cemetary party as Jane Lane, who is the BFF of “Daria.” Katy scores points here by not defaulting to a slutty costume (some variant of pirate, cat, or whatever else), and her wig looks really cute.

Kate Moss and Jamie Hince dressed up as Morticia and Gomez Addams as they attended tellie presenter Jonathan Ross’ party. Jamie pulled off his end of the deal. Kate, not so much.

Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter were at the same party as Kate, and it’s odd to think of Tim and Helena dressing up at all because Halloween occurs nearly every day for them.

Sadly, Avril Lavigne did not dress as ex Deryck Whibley but instead opted to wear this sexy sailor costume. Here’s a photo of her outside BOA Steakhouse. Very unoriginal and very Avril.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, and WENN