Nothing sets a girl’s heart aflutter in the early stages of dating like some freshly picked flowers; a handwritten note; or a trip to your man’s favorite strip club. Or at least that’s what Rhys Ifans would probably tell you.

Rhys was recently dumped by fiancé Sienna Miller. Via the phone. Sienna then claimed to friends that she never really had romantic feelings for Ifans. To his credit, Rhys didn’t go off the deep end, he has yet to rack up a DUI, and as far as I can tell he hasn’t made any large, stupid man-type purchases like a jet ski… or a decent haircut. I haven’t actually researched any of this, but I haven’t run across any benign dribble about it in the Daily Mail, and considering the mundane crap they’ll report on, I’m pretty sure it would have been splashed across the front page.

What he did do was start dating Kimberly Stewart, empty socialite daughter of Rod. By most accounts Kim makes Paris Hilton look like Jonas Salk. Apparently Rhys wanted to set himself apart from all the other guys and show Kim right of the bat just what kind of thoughtful guy he can be. So he took her to a nice dinner… at his favorite strip club.

Kimberly Stewart is said to have been left disappointed with Rhys Ifans after he apparently took her to a lapdancing club.

The pair have been spotted out in London on several dates since they met recently.

But it seems Rhys’ idea of a romantic night out involves a trip to strip club Spearmint Rhino..

‘It was awful,’ a source tells the Daily Star. ‘What girl wants to go to a titty bar with her new boyfriend at the beginning of a relationship?’

Earlier, Kimberly, 28, and Rhys, 40, had been partying at London’s Bungalow 8 club, where the Notting Hill actor got into a row with the paparazzi.

[From Now Magazine]

Ahhh, romance. Really, a guy could skip the flowers and the chocolates as long as he showed up at my door with a nice pair of pasties. There’s something about how sad and mopey Rhys Ifans often looks that makes me feel really badly for him. He seems to want a girl to settle down with, and somehow gets these fairly hot blonds. But they’re only into him for so long, then it’s back to the strip club. Maybe he should just start dating someone from there. It’ll save him a few steps, and I think they’d be a little less likely to leave him for Balthazar Getty.

Here’s Rhys and Kimberly on their way to Spearmint Rhinos strip club on July 31st. Images thanks to WENN.

I don’t really like jumping on the “Jennifer Aniston is so desperate/needy/pathetic/insecure” train. People seem to either love her or think she’s an absolute wreck, and apparently I’m one of only 12 people that are in between. All that said, everyone has moments of irrationality… and Jen had a pretty public one the other night. While backstage at boyfriend John Mayer’s Hard Rock Calling gig in London’s Hyde Park, Aniston spied Kimberly Stewart hanging out. Kim’s the daughter of Rod Stewart and is generally known for… um… hanging out.

According to the Mirror, Aniston ordered Kim banished from the backstage area – and Kim refused to listen.

John clearly has a bit of history with the model as all hell broke loose when clingy Jen spotted 28-year-old Kim backstage while John was warming up. Ever the gent, John tried to defuse the situation by getting his security to boot out Kim. And as the bouncers chased after Kim, Jen, 39, eyeballed her rival to warn her off John.

Our spy says: “Jennifer spotted Kimberly and asked John what she was doing there. John and Kim know each other from clubbing in LA, but Jennifer doesn’t want anyone around who reminds her that he used to be a player.”

But Kim wasn’t giving up without a fight… Ten minutes after being told to leave, she was on the side of the stage, waving at John and cheekily catching Jennifer’s eye while she was taking photos of her fella. We hear: “She had been told twice by security that she would be removed but she stood there bold as brass. Jennifer was on the opposite side of the stage and John felt like piggy-in-the-middle. He saw the tension and told his bouncers to get rid of her at all costs.

“Kim was pulled off the stage and escorted through the Hard Rock VIP tent with a face like thunder, shouting: ‘Why doesn’t he want me here? Is this because of her?’ “She totally embarrassed herself, but Jen looked relieved.”

[From the Mirror]

Wow. I don’t think anyone came out of that situation looking good. Aniston looks jealous and crazy, Stewart looks like a pathetic moron for sticking around until she was forced about by security, and Mayer looks whipped. Although frankly, that’s not really the worst situation for him to be in, considering the way he seems to use and go through women.

The whole thing about Jen not wanted to be “reminded” about what a player John used to be does cause a bit of worry. It makes it sound like she thinks she’s tamed him. I don’t think any woman should believe that about John Mayer. I swear to God if I’d been married to the guy for 60 years, I’d still be a little worried. Given his history, I understand Jen’s paranoia.

Here’s John Mayer performing live at ‘Hard Rock Calling’ in Hyde Park, London on June 28th. Gotta love that performing face. Photographer: Daniela D’Amato. Header photo of Jennifer at LAX airport on June 21st; Photographer: Craig Williams. Kimberly Stewart at the Glamour Women Of The Year Awards in London on June 3rd; Photographer: Vince Maher. Images thanks to WENN.

The photos discussed here are available at The Sun’s website

Kimberly Stewart, 28, is best known for being Rod Stewart’s daughter, hanging out with Paris Hilton for a few months until they inevitably tired of each other, having stints on various reality shows, and donning atrocious fashion and hairstyles - not necessarily in that order. She hasn’t made news much recently, probably because there are plenty of other candidates vying hard for the very few slots in the media consciousness for semi-attractive rich women who are famous for showing up and being themselves. The Hills women and Kim Kardashian ruined it for everyone.

Now the pixie-haired British waif has a brief change at fame again. She was photographed “snogging” Jude Law full-on at a club. Kimbo was even seen reaching down to grab Jude’s less than adequate manhood. The story goes that Jude’s bodyguards tried to delete the photos, but couldn’t figure out the camera or something:

They were clocked snogging in the VIP area of 195 Nightclub in Epping, Essex…

“We couldn’t believe it when we saw Kimberly Stewart snogging the face off Jude Law. They were really going at it and barely came up for air.

“He’s the first big name we have ever seen in there. So myself and my friends walked over and asked if we could have our photo taken with them. But they said no, turned back to face each other again then carried on kissing.

“Two bodyguards then came over to us and snatched the camera out of my friend’s hand because they had seen us taking pictures.

“They passed the camera to Jude, who then looked through our photos.

“The bodyguard later gave the camera back to us and, to our disappointment, they had deleted our pictures of Jude and Kimberly.”

[From The Sun]

Jude Law was off and on with Sienna Miller for years, and even went back to her after it became public knowledge that he cheated on her with his children’s nanny. You can see him going for Stewart - she seems just his speed. It’s doubtful he will do much for Stewart’s patchwork career, though. His star was a lot brighter when he was squiring Sienna and her ratty extensions around. Stewart seems like a low-rent version of Sienna, much like Law is a faded version of his former movie star glory. There’s still hope for him if he shaves his head, though.

Kimberly Stewart is shown looking hungry at the London premiere of Sex and The City on 5/12/08. Jude Law is shown outside his ex wife Sadie Frost’s home on 5/15/08, thanks to WENN.

Lindsay Lohan had the uncharacteristically smart foresight to snag her extracted faulty appendix from the hospital before it ended up on eBay. She took it home in a jar and threw it into the freezer for safekeeping.

Word is that Kimbo Stewart told her she should auction off the thing herself for charity.

Terrified that her recently-removed appendix might fall into weird hands and be auctioned off on eBay, Lindsay Lohan ordered the hospital to preserve her priceless part, then took it home, popped it into a canning jar - and froze it solid! Now here’s the twist: Lindsay’s pal Kimberly Steward is urging her to raise money for charity by auctioning off her appendix herself!

[From National Enquirer print edition, Mike Walker’s column, January 29, 2007]

William Shatner’s kidney stone went for $25,000 to GoldenPalace.com, so Kimberly has a good idea. Lindsay hasn’t done much else for charity and this would get her name in the papers for something positive.

I didn’t really think these two were friends, especially since Kimberly was said to hook up with Lohan’s ex, Harry Morton, this December. Lohan and Kimberly were both seen partying in Miami around the new year at the same club, but there are no pictures of them together. They both have liver problems, though, and may have bonded over a medical conversation.

Lohan left rehab briefly this weekend for a follow-up visit to the doctor. She was seen stopping for a snack at a convenience store. And that is what passes for news on this blog.

Header picture is of Kimberly in early December. Taken by Celebrity Puke.