Is it just me or is Adam Levine’s face really weird on this cover of Nylon Guys? They Photoshopped him, for sure, but I don’t really understand why. It’s like they blended him with Zachary Quinto for no reason. Anyway, Levine is promoting The Voice and maybe Maroon 5 too. But really, Adam is just promoting Adam and if there’s one thing you should know about Adam Levine, it’s that he’s a modelizing d-bag who eschews condoms and hates marriage. Sounds like a winner, right?

He never wants to get married: ”I’m doing pretty well. If you don’t get married, you can’t get divorced. Why couldn’t we learn from the devastatingly low percentage of successful marriages that our last generation went through?”

He works a lot but doesn’t want to complain: ”It’s a lot. But it might not be a lot someday. I don’t like to complain. You have this moment. It doesn’t last forever. You should probably try and enjoy it.”

On the reports Shakira is making twice as much as him on The Voice: ”She’s Shakira dude! She’s a f***ing international superstar! I don’t care. It’s just money.”

On dealing with the paparazzi: “The more you make them look like f–king idiots, the better you are. It’s like intellectual warfare. Just don’t say anything.”

[From Global Grind & Contact Music]

Is Adam really that much of a paparazzi target? He got more attention when he was dating Anne V (until she dumped him!), but now that he’s with Behati Prinsloo, no one seems to give a crap. The only time I hear people talking about him is when they’re saying his music sucks and he’s not as likeable as Blake Shelton on The Voice. As for marriage… I kind of feel the same way. I’m not anti-marriage for everyone, I just don’t think it’s the right choice for me and it kills me a little that Adam and I are on the same page. If I agree with a d-bag on one issue, what does that mean?!

Photos courtesy of Nylon Guys, WENN.

Here’s a picture of Adam Levine on Wednesday while launching his new “celebrity fragrance” (eponymously named “Adam Levine”) at Macy’s. He told E! Online that the scent “smells like sh-t,” which is actually rather creative, but I’m guessing the fragrance actually carries high notes of earthy, overinflated ego with a vague undertone of nutty, misunderstood douche. That’s just a guess, but I could be wrong.

What’s interesting about Adam’s latest career move is that, in 2011, he famously tweeted that he wanted to “put an official ban on celebrity fragrances. Punishable by death from this point forward.” Now of course, he’s revoked his statement since he’s looking to cash in on his own stink. Adam still insisted to Us Weekly that “I’m not a fan of celebrity fragrances,” but he thinks that his “anti-cologne” is worthy enouh to “compete with Dior.” Good luck with that.

In other Levine news, he and Justin Bieber are reportedly at odds with each other. It seems that, according to Star, Adam and his female cousin were attending a yoga class when Biebs joined in to admire all of the downward-dog poses in the room. Then Bieb started hitting on Adam’s cousin, and the latter was not pleased with the former’s moves:

It was a swag smackdown at Equinox Gym in West Hollywood when Adam Levine recently caught Justin Bieber checking out his cousin! “Adam brought his pretty female cousin into the same yoga class that Justin was in, and Justin immediately pulled Adam aside and asked who she was,” whispered an eyewitness. “Adam laughed at how forward Justin was and said, ‘It’s my cousin — you stay away.” But the girl-crazy Biebs was undeterred, says Star’s spy: “Justin couldn’t stop staring at her,and then he ran over and asked for her number. Adam was annoyed and told Justin to back off and be more respectful.”

In the end, Justin deferred to the Voice coach. “Clearly, Justin’s used to doing what he wants, but Adam put him in his place,” says our spy. Seems the young lady dodged a case of Bieber Fever — for now!

[From Star, print edition, February 18. 2013]

You do realize why Adam was so upset about this, right? Because Adam once told Details, that yoga was good for one thing — “Fuuuu-k-ing.” One can’t really blame Adam for not wanting Biebs to bang his cousin because it takes a douche to know a douche. Myself included.

Photos courtesy of WENN

Prince is a strange cat, isn’t he? I mean, the dude looks about thirty-four years old when he’s really fifty-four. He’s also quite the erratic diva. Not only did he declare the internet to be “dead“ about two years ago, but he’s got a long history of changing his name from “Prince” to “The Artist formerly known as Prince” to some unpronouncable symbol and then back to “Prince” again. Maybe that’s where P. Diddy gets it from, right?

As odd and diva-esque as Prince often shows himself to be, he’s still an institution. I still love listening to his old tunes like “Raspberry Beret,” “Little Red Corvette,” and (my absolute favorite) “When Doves Cry.” Unfortunately, his new tunes aren’t nearly as catchy and are pretty weak. He’s got a new single out, “Screwdriver,” that proves this point. Still, Prince will always be able to sell concert tickets, and this May, he’s going to be honored honored with the 2013 Icon Award at the Billboard Music Awards. So he sat down with Billboard for an interview to promote something indefinite. I don’t know what he’s promoting, actually, because his upcoming album neither has a name nor a release date, so I guess he’s just pimping his awful new single. Here are some excerpts:

He’s very paranoid: He remains adamant about not allowing reporters to record their conversations with him. (“Some in the past have taken my voice and sold it,” he says. “I can’t remember the incident that triggered it and it’s probably best that I don’t.”) And he still frowns at the idea of a reporter taking notes. (“That would be just like texting.”)

Why he turned against his record label: “It was always about Madonna. She was getting paid, but at the same time we were selling more records and selling out concerts on multiple nights.”

On Maroon 5′s cover of “Kiss”: “Why do we need to hear another cover of a song someone else did?” he quips in the interview, noting that he has no problem with artists performing covers during live shows. “Art is about building a new foundation, not just laying something on top of what’s already there.”

[From Billboard]

Madonna and Prince have always disliked each other, and they’re both divas from the same era, so there’s definitely no surprise that they’ll never be friends, and Prince definitely is one to hold a grudge. He’s probably been stewing over their rivalry for quite some time (while Madge probably hasn’t thought of him in years), and now Prince blames her for making him dislike Warner Brothers when everyone remembers how he wrote “slave” on his face to express his true distaste with corporate music. He’s so fickle.

On the Adam Levine/Maroon 5 bit, I’m guessing that Prince isn’t so much offended that someone remade his song as the fact that he didn’t get a cut of the profits. There’s nothing wrong with a well-covered song (lately, I’ve been going crazy after reaquainting myself with Marilyn Manson’s take on The Eurythmics’ “Sweet Dreams”), but I can also see why Maroon 5 would fail to impress Prince.

Here are some photos of Prince performing in France in 2010 and 2011. He’s got a great stage presence even if he is an incorrigible grouch.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and Billboard

Adam Levine must not get out much. He must not read the newspaper or watch the news or pay attention to much outside the celebrity and entertainment bubble. He must not watch The Soup. Or else why would he call TLC’s Honey Boo Boo show “literally the worst thing that’s ever happened” and “the decay of Western civilization.” He didn’t even say the show is “the worst thing that’s ever happened to television,” he said it was the worst thing ever – literally. (I hate when people use that term incorrectly to make their asinine point. “Literally” means actually. So “Honey Boo Boo” is “literally” the worst thing that’s ever happened in Adam Levine’s entire worldview.) There are much worse things on television, particularly on TLC, I’m not going to get into the broader meaning that Levine used, like wars and plagues and natural disasters. Granted I’m not a fan but the family seemed pretty harmless to me in the pilot, and I’ve seen the mom act graciously in interviews. She could use some manners, but they’re not the worst people. Television gets much trashier than Honey Boo Boo, but Adam went off on the show in a new interview, with GQ. They asked him what was scarier, which was a nod to his bit part on American Horror Story this season. (AHS is worse than Honey Boo Boo, IMO, that show really went off the rails recently.)

Here’s what he said:

GQ: Waking up not famous or waking up as one of Honey Boo Boo’s parents? Adam Levine: Seriously, Honey Boo Boo is the DECAY of Western civilization. Just because so many people watch the show doesn’t mean it’s good. So many people witness atrocities and can’t take their eyes away from them, but that doesn’t mean they’re good. That show is literally The. Worst. Thing. That’s. Ever. Happened. It’s complete f#@*ing ignorance and the most despicable way to treat your kids. F#@* those people. You can put that in the magazine: F#@* those idiots. They’re just the worst. Sorry, I’m so sensitive to that—like, I don’t know, man, it’s upsetting. Just to clarify, I said, “F#@* THOSE PEOPLE.”

[From GQ via US Weekly]

Tell us how you really think Adam. So it’s ok to brag about having unprotected sex, but some family that got famous for beings rednecks is somehow the worst thing that’s ever happened – ever, and Adam Levine hates them. Why does he care so much?

I shouldn’t pay too much attention to what this guy says. He regularly acts like a douche, both in interviews and in his personal life. Unlike Adam I don’t get too worked up about it though. Now we know one of his weaknesses. If you want to hurt Adam Levine’s widdle feelings, just mock him and tell him that Honey Boo Boo is more famous.

Adam Levine is shown with his girlfriend, Bahati Prinsloo, in July and November. He’s shown outside The Late Show in October. Credit: Fame Flynet. Honey Boo Boo is shown in October. Credit: Michael Wright/WENN.com

Is it any secret that I kind of have a hate-on for Adam Levine? I think he’s a d-bag. I think he’s smug and dirty and gross and probably a real piece of work in his private life. So… it’s kind of surprising that I don’t like him more, right? I always go for the bastards. Those of you who watch The Voice tend to say that he’s pretty decent on there, and Levine’s career continues to sky-rocket, because A) He’s a judge on a hit show, B) He and Maroon 5 are still making hit records, C) He’s like a Leonardo DiCaprio-esque dater – he just picks out a new model from the Victoria’s Secret catalog, and D) Everyone wants to talk to him and validate his existence, and Adam LOVES attention. Thus, he appears on the cover of Inked Magazine, showing off his tattoos and talking about how much he hates music critics:

“Music critics are all f**king idiots,” Adam Levine proclaims at the very beginning of his interview, taking a stand against some of the negative reviews of his band’s latest album, “Overexposed.”

“There’s obviously a certain balance between pursuing an audience and pursuing what you love to do, but I love what we do,” he adds. “I would never put out a record I didn’t want to listen to.”

And when it comes to criticism that the band has sold out, Levine admits he loves having major, mainstream attention.

“I get off on that ability to connect with a large group of people. That’s what I aim for when we’re making music,” he says. “I’d much rather be able to go to Indonesia and sing a song that we wrote and have everyone sing the words than be hiding and playing in a little club.”

“If I wanted to make a record that was super self-indulgent and all about the art I would, but I’d rather take those skills and apply them to something else, which is gathering a huge audience to appreciate the music,” he adds.

Making music isn’t his only love though, as Adam opens up to the mag about two other passions: Tattoos and acting. Levine shows off his many tatts in the issue, revealing that he had his first one done — of a dove — when he was 21. Since, he’s added a tiger, and a “Mom” heart.

And his latest: A string of beads around his neck. “I was in Japan and I got this necklace. I’m not sure why I got it—I think I was bored. But I like it.”

We’ll see more of Levine this fall when he makes his acting debut on Season Two of “American Horror Story,” a career move he’s that makes him a little nervous.

“It’s challenging,” he says. “The first thing I did when I got the job was ask friends who are actors what the f**k I was supposed to do.”

[From Too Fab]

He doesn’t come across too badly here. I guess I should bash him for bitching about music critics (especially since Maroon 5′s records are almost always critically panned), but I don’t care for most music criticism either. Music criticism, like film criticism, can be an art. But music criticism in particular tends to veer into what I like to think of as “insiderism”. As in, only “insiders” like a particular band, and that band is the ONLY band making good music and everyone else can suck it, and of course the music critic likes that band. I’m just saying… as far as Maroon 5 goes, I can definitely think of more offensive pop/rock acts. Is Levine a douche? Of course. But I still have “One More Night” stuck in my head (although the video is super-douchey, and seeing Minka Kelly in there makes me sad):

Photos courtesy of Inked via Idolator.

On any given day, Adam Levine’s face screams “DOUCHE!” to me. In the past few years, I’ve been happy to see that my gut-reaction (“Ew.”) has a basis in reality: Adam Levine says douchey things, ergo, the man is a d-bag. But I’m going to give Adam a brief reprieve. According to Star Magazine, Adam is one of the few music industry professionals unwilling to let “bygones be bygones” when it comes to the Chris Brown situation. Star claims that Adam has such a hate-on for all things Chris Brown, Adam even mistreats Voice contestants who sing Chris’s songs.

Adam Levine recently faced up to rumors that he’s a womanizer by saying: “Maybe the reason I was promiscuous and wanted to sleep with a lot of them is that I love them so much.” He adores women so much, in fact, that he can’t stand a certain R&R crooner who doesn’t treat them right.

“Adam hates Chris Brown,” a source tells Star. “And he has no problem telling people that.” His anti-Chris feelings are so strong that they’re affecting his work as a judge on The Voice, which recently began filming its third season. During blind auditions, one contestant sang one of Chris’s songs and did an amazing job, but Adam was so blinded by his hatred for Chris that he took it out on the performer for his choice of tune.

“Adam flat-out told the guy he would have chosen him if he hadn’t sung a Chris Brown song,” the insider says. “He said some people might be over what Chris did, but he isn’t and never will be.”

Adam’s integrity is admirable – but the source thought he took things too far.

“Adam didn’t need to let his personal opinions of Chris affect his judgment,” the source explained. “It was actually really inappropriate and immature for him to refuse to choose the singer based on the original artist.”

[From Star Magazine, print edition]

Eh. “It was actually really inappropriate and immature for him to refuse to choose the singer based on the original artist.” Not really? I would be turned off if I heard someone covering a Chris Brown song too. I simply associate Chris’s music with being a violent woman-beater and an immature, tantrumy, homophobic, misogynistic sh-t. So… Team Levine on this one. Even though I suspect Adam’s anti-Chris Brown stance is partly “I’m such a sensitive lover of women” posturing, I wish more music professionals would openly despise Brown and hold Chris accountable for his terrible actions.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Here’s some photos of Keira Knightley and Adam Levine filming together on the set of Can A Song Save Your Life? in New York City. In the movie, Adam plays a down-and-out record company executive who becomes friends with a hot young singer and songwriter who is new in town. It sounds like a silly sort of movie, but they look like they’re having fun together on the set or, at least, Keira is very good at acting like she’s enjoying herself.

The film’s synopsis doesn’t reveal its genre, but it’s probably a romantic comedy. Mark Ruffalo also stars too, so that’s something to look forward to as well.

Now here’s a closer look at Adam’s new scruffy beard, which he also debuted on his Twitter account with the caption, “Grizzly Man!” I can’t really make a judgment call on this one because I find him so douchey on a consistent basis, but does he look better with this beard or as his former, clean-shaven self? Keira looks lovely as always.

Photos courtesy of WENN

As if we needed another reason to describe Adam Levine as a douche, right? Just in the past week, Details released a Levine interview in which he described yoga as good for one thing …. fuuuu-k-ing, which was pretty much enough to solidify my own opinion of the man. Of course, it doesn’t help that his girlfriend of two years, Anne Vyalitsyna, saw fit to dump Adam after he told the world about his very own fool-proof method of birth control, pulling out. Now Adam has eclipsed his previous level of douche by immediately moving on to a new girl, Behati Prinsloo, who just happens to be one of Anne’s fellow Victoria’s Secret Angels and a (formerly) good friend of hers. This week’s issue of Us Weekly says that Behati has “always had a crush” on Adam, and it sounds like Adam is taking advantage while he still can:

Revenge romance! Two months ago, Adam Levine, 33, was blindsided by Anne Vyalitsyna when she dumped him via a press statement. Now the “Voice” star has found love again — with her friend Behati Prinsloo! “Behati always had a crush on Adam,” a source tells hot Stuff of the Namibian model, 23. “And she was a little jealous of Anne.” The Victoria’s Secret Angels “are good friends,” says a source. “Not best — but close enough.” And now, perhaps, not at all: Vyalitsyna stopped following Prinsloo on Twitter! But the betrayed Russian beauty, 26, has soothed her wounds with a new man: A source says she’s been “flirting and texting” with True Blood’s Alexander Skarsgard, 35. “Anne’s been traveling, so they haven’t been able to see each other,” says the insider. “But she’s his type!”

[From Us Weekly, print edition, June 18, 2012]

If this is true (and photos of the two kissing in Hawaii suggest it is), then Behati is obviously no better than Adam for crossing the lines of friendship so soon after a breakup. I bet Adam sweet talked her into bed, and it probably wasn’t hard to accomplish if she’s truly always had a crush on the dude. Still, I wonder if Anne has really gotten “revenge” by sleeping with Alexander Skarsgard? That part of the story might not be true — if Alex was truly sleeping with every girl with whom the tabloids would hope to tie him, then he’d be the biggest manslut in the universe. And I refuse to believe that … just yet.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN

Kaiser tried to get me to cover this Adam Levine story in Details because she didn’t want to do it. I tried to beg off and pass, but then I saw the best quotes from Adam’s interview on Evil Beet. He’s just an a*hole, and I feel pretty confident calling him that. To recap Adam: he has a reputation as a womanizer, and in one of the last interviews we covered with him he was bragging about having unprotected sex with his girlfriend, Victoria’s Secret model Anne Vyalitsyna. She subsequently dumped his cheating ass by issuing a press release and not even bothering to give him a heads up about it first, making me assume he’d done something truly awful to her. (Although I just suspect it was garden variety cheating.)

Well Adam pontificates at length to Details about why he’s so successful with women, and how his attitude (douche) has to do with growing up with jilted women or something. He’s compensating for something, and I don’t feel sorry for any woman who falls for his total b.s. Here’s some of what he said, and thanks to Evil Beet for condensing it down for us:

On being misrepresented: “I’ve always felt a little misrepresented in the world. I felt like people only knew me as a singer who dated pretty girls. A little bit of a bimbo. Maybe I was kind of a bimbo,” he adds, laughing. “I was the music dude that was naked all the time with the girls, and that’s fine, no problem with that. But I wanted to create a little balance. When the show [The Voice] came around, I thought, ‘People now know that I have a brain.’”

On Christina Aguilera: “I always thought Christina was the best pop singer around. She wasn’t just a pop star—she could sing her f-cking ass off. We butted heads a little in the beginning. I had sympathy for her being the only girl, though, so I laid off. Blake has a charming way of bickering with her, but I can’t pull that off. We’re totally cool now.”

On yoga: “You know what yoga’s good for?” Adam Levine asks, pausing in mid-thought as he discusses his healthful lifestyle. He draws to his feet, balances in the private jet’s narrow aisle, points at his crotch, and thrusts his pelvis like a porn star. “I’ll tell you what yoga is good for: Fuuuu-k-ing,” he chimes, in a singsong falsetto, then laughs.

On understanding women: “One of my theories on why I’m so capable of understanding women is that after my parents split, my mom moved in with her brother’s ex-wife—my aunt—who was also newly single,” he says. “So I was living in a house with two jilted women, plus my cousin, who’s more like my sister, and my brother, Michael, who we eventually find out is gay. Just the estrogen alone . . . You know when you’re 14 and terrified to talk to a girl? I didn’t suffer much from that. It seemed very natural to me to talk to girls.”

On loving women: “There’s two kinds of men,” Levine posits. “There are men who are f-cking misogynist pigs, and then there are men who just really love women, who think they’re the most amazing people in the world. And that’s me. Maybe the reason I was promiscuous, and wanted to sleep with a lot of them, is that I love them so much.”

On attention: “I love attention. I can’t stand not having it. It just has to be the right kind. To do what you love, to be with the people you love? That’s all I want. That’s the ‘kwan.’”

[From Details via Evil Beet]

Whatever, Adam. I just hope that this interview helps warn any model with two brain cells to rub together that she should stay far, far away from this douche. This is some John Mayer pre-voice losing sh*t. This guy is believing his own hype, and he will probably continue to believe it until he also faces some sort of life setback that makes him realize he’s a jerk. Some guys never have that epiphany, and it’s long overdue for Adam.

Also, I agree with the Emily at Evil Beet: that’s nice what he said about Christina. But given how he goes on about what a charmer he is, I don’t buy that he’s sincere at all. Creep.

Photos thanks to Details, where there are more.

Yesterday the NBC upfront photo op happened, and I have to say that I’m disappointed in the photos we have. No one from “Community” showed up that I can find, but more than that the red and orange backdrop is throwing me off, and making all the cute, colorful outfits look like they clash. I know this is a strange complaint, but this is why they use white and black neutral-colored backdrops for these events. Red and orange are popular colors this season, and a large number of the starlets accidentally wore outfits that look fug against the backdrop, but would be perfectly cute on their own.

First off is Eva Longoria in a lovely scarlet silk and cotton Alberta Ferretti featuring ribbon-like details. I think this dress is killer. It’s sexy without showing too much, and it highlights Eva’s amazing figure without being too tight. Our friends at Red Carpet Fashion Awards don’t like Eva’s shoes, and point out that she always wears the same Brian Atwood “Maniac” pumps. I think that she went for some understated shoes so as not to vamp up the outfit too much, and that it works. Eva is one of the women whose bright-colored dress is being overshadowed by the background.

Eva is helming a reality show called “Ready For Love,” in which they’re bringing “online dating to television.” It’s like a twist on The Bachelor, but with three guys and a huge amount of available women. The guys look really hot of course.

Next we have Anne Heche in bright a orange Max Mara skirt (In other photos it looks like she was wearing split pants, but it’s a skirt) paired with a peach silk top with cut-out sleeves. She looks amazing to me here, and I even like her platform shoes, which would seem goofy with most other outfits. This is very fashion forward and Anne looks great. She’s starring in a upcoming show called “Save Me“, about a woman who thinks she’s saved by God and has to spread the word. She plays crazy so well.

“Parks and Rec” star Amy Poehler was super cute in a dark pink knee-length tight dress paired with nude pumps and a cropped leather jacket. I just love that jacket with that dress.

You know I love “Parenthood,” and real life couple Lauren Graham and Peter Krause. Lauren’s oversized shirt, big belt and clunky shoes just aren’t working for her. They look like a great couple I have to say.

Debra Messing also opted for a big belt and paired it with a loose polka dot dress. It’s an ok look, but it’s just kind of mediocre to me.

Fellow “Smash” star Katherine McPhee was in a pink flower print Dolce & Gabanna. I’m not a fan of floral dresses, and this is kind of falling flat for me. Some of you may love it.

Mariska Hargitay was so pretty in form fitting white. She could have gone without the matchy shoes, and mixed it up by varying the color of her footwear.

Adam Levine wore glasses, a plaid shirt and some jeans with a chain hanging out of his pocket. Sadly, his co-judge on The Voice, Xtina, didn’t make it. I was hoping she would bring her drunk orange vamp act to the upfronts.

Jenna Elfman tried to wear dressy shorts with a shirt with big goofy buttons and a little black jacket. It looked ridiculous, but at least her shoes were cute.

Photo credit: WENN.com and Fame Flynet