Joe Simpson seems absolutely intent on wrecking as much of his daughters’ lives as he possibly can. Truly, if he sat down with a marker, paper, and poster board and drew out some type of chart titled, “Ways to Interfere with/Mess Up Offspring & Impede All Forms of Happiness,” he could not have done a better job. Which is why I’m pretty sure he’s planned this all out. Because any quasi-sane, loving parent would have stepped off by now and said, “You know what? Whatever I touch, I ruin. Maybe I should stop touching things.” And I mean that exactly how it sounds, Joe Simpson. Perv.

Anyway, Joe has decided he wasn’t satisfied just ruining daughter Jessica’s life with his domineering, interfering ways while filming the Newlyweds with now ex-husband Nick Lachey. There’s a reason Nick’s an ex, and it rhymes with and looks just like Papa Joe. Simpson has decided (seemingly without involving his daughter in the decision) that Ashley and new fiancé Pete Wentz are going to do their own Newlyweds show. Because why wreck just one marriage when you can wreck two?

Get yourself ready for the return of MTV’s Newlyweds — with a twist! Instead of Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey, it’s Simpson version 2.0 is coming your way, with Jessica’s little sister, Ashlee Simpson, 23, and fiancé, Pete Wentz, 28, set to appear as the couple in the hit MTV format — at least if Joe Simpson gets his way!

Never one to miss a money-making opportunity, Ashlee’s dad and manager Joe seems determined to turn this idea into a reality. “He knows that no one cared about Jessica before her reality show, and he’s hoping a show for Ashlee will have the same effect,” a source close to the singer tells OK!.

With a wedding on the horizon, a baby on the way and a famous rocker fiancé, Ashlee’s life has all the ingredients for a reality show. (Ashlee and Pete’s publicist tells OK! they are not set to appear in Newlyweds.) If the program comes off, let’s hope the Bittersweet World singer’s love story doesn’t end the same way as her sister’s failed marriage.

[From OK!]

Touché, OK. Touché. Never did I think I could wholeheartedly agree with anything that came from the printing press of OK Magazine, but they’re pretty much right on the ball on this one. The Simpson girls clearly don’t have the spine to stand up to their father. I was hoping one of their spouses would have, but if I were a betting woman, I would have gone with Nick Lachey long before I could imagine Pete Wentz standing up to Papa Joe. And I think he’s a little too busy sharpening his eyeliner pencil to be bothered. The sad thing is, I’d probably watch this show, if only to yell at Joe Simpson.

Here’s Pete and Ashley at the White House Correspondents’ Association dinner at the Washington Hilton on April 26th. Images thanks to WENN.

Ashlee Simpson and her Cher hair were on The Today Show this morning. She giggled foolishly throughout her brief talk with Matt Lauer. He asked her about “the rumors about expanding the family,” and she didn’t deny it but had a better answer than just saying it was an inappropriate question:

“That [rumor] has been going around for about a year now, so only time will tell with that… but I am giving birth to my record on the 22nd. That’s my new baby.”

She does look pregnant to me, and as both JayBird and I have said it’s certainly great timing for her considering that her album is dropping next week. She bugs the shit out of me for some reason, and this Beatlejuice getup she’s wearing on the Today Show is making me feel nauseous, like when I was three months pregnant.

Here’s the video of her interview:

And here’s Ashlee singing “Little Miss Obsessive,” which she says is what we all can become in a relationship. She really should stick to lip syncing.

Ashlee Simpson is shown at the Conde Nast Traveler 8th Annual Hot List Party on 4/17/08, thanks to WENN.

Ashlee Simpson sure is encouraging the press in the whole “is she or isn’t she” pregnancy runaround. Though she’s technically out and about promoting her new album, Bittersweet World, it seems more like she’s promoting her relationship/engagement/possible baby. Or maybe it’s the reverse. Surely all this publicity right as Ashlee’s releasing her first album in years can’t be entirely a coincidence. If it is – my goodness, what a fabulous time to get accidentally knocked up.

Ashlee stopped by for a visit with Ryan Seacrest on his radio show this morning, where she talked about her upcoming wedding, and gave a few vague, confusing quotes.

“I didn’t know I’d be getting married right now, but I’m so happy to be!” she said, calling from her mother’s Ritz-Carlton hotel room in NYC. “I’m a lucky girl.” How did Wentz – a Hot Hollywood Style honoree – pop the question? “That part I am keeping sacred,” she said, “but I will tell you that it was very thoughtful, and he did a great job. Of course, it was thoughtful,” she added, “He’s like that.”

Simpson — who flashed her new engagement ring (which Wentz designed) in NYC Wednesday — said she loved her rock. “It’s definitely a big diamond!” she said. “I go, ‘Oh, my God, I can’t believe its on my hand!’” When asked if she’d be marrying soon, Simpson replied, “I can’t tell my secrets,” but added, “my mom loves Pete, so does my dad!” Seacrest avoided asking flat-out if she were pregnant, but asked whether she’d be drinking booze during her stay this week in NYC (where she is promoting her new album Bittersweet World). Simpson replied, “Who knows? Maybe.”

[From Us Weekly]

I thought the whole “I didn’t know I’d be getting married right now” thing was kind of odd. The phrasing is kind of poor and leaves you guessing what she meant – though maybe that’s intentional. At first I took it to mean that Ashlee didn’t know she’d be getting married so young – but then I thought perhaps she was hinting that she didn’t plan on getting married at this point in her life. Which makes you wonder why she would. A part of me can’t help but wonder if Ashlee is indeed really pregnant, or if her manager/dad is just exploiting the rumors to help album sales.

Here’s Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz last night. Images thanks to Splash.

Creepy “daddy don’t touch me” Joe Simpson has backed off pimping out his older daughter now that his younger one, Ashlee, is pregnant and engaged. Hoping to exploit her current
situation and the tabloid magazines’ obsession with celebrity babies, the former minister-turned-manager is already trying to hammer out deals with mags to publish Ashlee and Pete’s wedding photos and pictures of the baby when it’s born. There isn’t even a due date yet, but you can bet Papa Joe is gonna cash in! Problem is, the magazines aren’t all that interested in Ashlee.

Simpson sisters’ dad-ager, Joe Simpson, is trying to cash in on the baby-crazed trend in celebrity magazines - but he’s having a difficult time.

A magazine source said, “Joe is contacting all the weeklies and asking them to pony up $1 million to put Ashlee on the cover.” The news broke this week that Jessica’s younger sibling is pregnant with her now-fiancée Pete Wentz’s child - a claim Wentz has backed off denying.

“The deal would include photos of Ashlee - taken by Joe, of course, so he can make more money - an interview and photos of the baby when she has it,” our source said.

Sadly, there is some interest - but not for anything close to $1 million.

One magazine editor said the pictures would fetch “$60,000 maybe - but definitely not a million. The timing is a little suspicious. Her album [’Bittersweet World’] is dropping next week, and there was little to no interest until now. Ashlee’s lucky she got pregnant, frankly.”

But even with the marriage announcement, “Joe has an unrealistic expectation of what Ashlee can command,” the editor said.

Ashlee’s shotgun wedding to Wentz is expected to take place before summer. Her rep declined to comment.

A source told OK! magazine, “They’re planning on something in the Santa Barbara area probably by the end of May . . . Jessica will be the maid of honor.”

Ashlee is said to be eyeing a Vera Wang dress and will likely wear a ring designed by Wentz.

This wouldn’t be the first time Joe has mucked things up for his daughters. During Jessica’s visit to Africa with the Operation Smile charity two years ago, he insisted on being the only one to take pictures of her, despite having a professional photographer along on the trip - thus making himself the only one to collect the cash when he sold the photos to People magazine.

Joe also undercut Jessica when she did a deal for the launch issue of OK! At the time, it was reported Jessica got a mere $250,000 for the spread - despite Sean Combs getting more than $1 million several weeks later.

[From Page Six]

Pardon me while I laugh. Ha ha ha! Papa Joe probably fancies himself in the same league as Lynne Spears or Dina Lohan, but the reality is, his daughters just don’t get the same attention, because pretty much everyone in the universe- including the tabloids- are over them both. Personally, I wouldn’t pay $1 to see Ashlee’s wedding or baby photos. On the other hand, I would pay top dollar to sit in the front row of Ashlee and Pete’s divorce court hearings. Papa Joe, if you’re smart, you’ll start selling tickets now.

Joe and Ashlee Simpson are shown at the American Music Awards on 11/21/06, thanks to PRPhotos.

Pete Wentz told MTV that not only is his new fiance Ashlee Simpson not pregnant, but that the tabloid reports that she is pregnant are like a witch hunt. He says they are engaged, but that all the other stuff is false:

In an e-mail to MTV News, Wentz denied reports that surfaced Monday (April 14) on the Web sites of OK! magazine and Us Weekly that he and Simpson, 23, are expecting their first child.

“There is a witch hunt for people to be pregnant whenever they get engaged in Hollywood,” he wrote. “This is all news to me. I can’t wait for the story about how I’m really in a gay relationship and this is all just a cover. … I mean really, this is crazy. … I mean we’re engaged, that’s true, and happy about it.”

Asked again if he was denying reports that Simpson is pregnant, Wentz, 28, replied, “Yeah.”

[From MTV.com]

MTV’s report on Pete’s denial reminds us that both US Weekly and OK! Magazine used “unnamed sources” for their stories, with such scant evidence as Ashlee’s possible morning sickness out at lunch and insider reports that she’s “asking everyone, ‘Am I showing yet?’”

It’s all due to the parody video showing Ashlee pregnant that Pete posted on his website
Pete should be careful not to blame anyone but himself for the pregnancy rumors. He posted a stupid video on his website in late February that was meant to be humorous and featured Ashlee wearing a big fake belly and acting like a hick. Pete talked about how he wanted to do charity work, but said that it was too hard. He then deadpanned that “The biggest problem facing our generation is the illegal downloading of music. I know what I’ll do, I’ll make a baby, because you can’t download a baby.” He said “here’s our answer to how to make the world a better place” and the camera panned to Ashlee on the bed with a big belly saying “honey get me the Cheetos!” Then Pete said “Street date, July 2008″ and the credits listed “and the unborn baby, as himself.”

Maybe Ashlee and Pete are trying to say it’s selfish to have children when there are so many people wanting in the world, but it also comes off as if they’re telling everyone they’re having a baby. So how is it a witch hunt if this video, which seems to include a due date and also lists their unborn child in the credits, sparks pregnancy rumors?

Thanks to FriendsOrEnemies.com via LAist for the video.

Pete and Ashlee are shown on 2/23/08 at LAX nightclub, thanks to PRPhotos.

Ah, Jessica Simpson, the deepest of depths. Though there’s a bit of debate regarding her stupidity - or regarding her intelligence, depending on how you want to frame the question (Joe Simpson once claimed in a Vanity Fair article that Simpson had an IQ of 160). Either InStyle magazine rephrased her answers or somehow gave her a shot of smart serum (okay maybe just less-dumb-than-regular serum) but she actually came off as reasonably intelligent in an article they wrote about her. They asked her about love and dealing with heartbreak, and Simpson responded in a way that made her seem relatively optimistic and pretty normal.

Love hasn’t always been kind to Jessica Simpson – even since her divorce from Nick Lachey – but the singer and actress says there’s something empowering about the disillusionment that comes with heartbreak.

“I’ve had my heart broken since my divorce,” Simpson, 27, tells InStyle for its November issue, perhaps referring to her relationship with John Mayer, which ended in June. “That’s OK. I believe you fall in love more than once and get your heart broken more than once. Trust me, I have cried myself to sleep.”

Simpson says she once felt like “the princess in the fairy tale – then reality came crashing in, and I learned that isn’t always how life works.”

Still, in the bigger picture, that may be a valuable lesson to learn. Nowadays, Simpson says, “I am in complete control of my life.”

[From People]

It’s kind of silly, but it makes me feel a little better to know that even pretty, rich, and famous like Jessica Simpson has cried herself to sleep. Simpson also talked about her relationship with her younger sister Ashlee, and the advantages they each get from the relationship.

In the InStyle piece, Simpson answers questions from friends and family. When sister Ashlee asks what she likes most about having a younger sister, Jessica says it’s that they can lean on each other. “I go to my sister for advice all the time, mostly about guys, life or how to deal with an argument with Mom or Dad,” she says. “You’d think she was older. I had to go through life first, and she saw the choices I made, good or bad. She can look at my life and be, like, ‘OK, I’m not gonna do it this way.’ I might be a little more jaded, but it’s exciting for me to see her making good choices.”

[From People]

It does seem like Ashlee makes better choices that Jessica. Not that Jessica made terrible decisions; it’s not like you see her out drinking and snorting coke every night like a lot of celebutards. But she did marry her first boyfriend pretty young, and I would imagine for a lot of people – after the honeymoon period wore off – you’d want to know what else was out there. I think that would only be compounded by living in Hollywood and having so much temptation around. Ashlee’s dated several guys and generally lived more of life in general, and has yet to settle down, so I’d guess that’s a result of seeing how unhappy it made her sister.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Jessica at the Operation Smile 25th Anniversary Gala on October 5th. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Nope, not really. Rumours have been circulating that Pete Wentz of Fall Out Boy got down on bended knee at the LiveEarth concert, prompted by Ashlee’s rumoured pregnancy, and Ashlee happily accepted.

But, while Ashlee may not seem as high maintenance as her sister Jessica, I still think she’d like to be proposed to in a more romantic setting. Somewhere significantly more private, not thirty seconds before her boyfriend is going on stage with his band. Maybe when he’s in front of the LiveEarth TV audience, but definitely not backstage next to the rider full of pringles and beer.

Ashlee actually describes herself as single in the June 2007 issue of Cosmopolitan, so maybe she are Pete are more a couple of the fuck buddy variety. After all, she hasn’t made a public vow of virginity. Still, I can just see papa Joe Simpson rubbing his palms together in glee at the concept of another Simpson baby to exploit and contribute to his bank balance.

Adam Brody was flirting up a storm with Ashlee Simpson at a recent event. Adam is newly single and has been hitting the LA hot spots with his friends after splitting with gorgeous O.C. costar Rachel Bilson. This news from Star makes it seem like he was being flirty with Ashlee, and they were probably just talking, but maybe these two will hook up at some point:

Adam Brody, 27, and Rachel Bilson, 25, are officially over. Adam was spotted with Ashlee Simpson at the Volkswagen Tiguan Concept party in L.A. on November 28. A source tells Star, “Ashlee was giggling up a storm, like she really loved all the attention.” The two seemed infatuated with one another; Brody couldn’t keep his eyes off of her!

[from the Star Magazine e-mail newsletter.]

I might call these two the new couple of Adam couldn’t keep his hands off Ashlee, but maybe he was just staring at her because he was amazed at how much her face has changed recently.

Meanwhile Star also says that Ashlee and Lindsay have made up after their public spat over scumbag Wilmer Valderrama. Lindsay was said to have made sure Ashlee and sister Jessica didn’t get into an MTV party she was hosting. Ashlee later said on The Charlotte Church show that she has a song called “I didn’t steal your boyfriend” which is dedicated to Lindsay. (Part is 2:30 minutes into video clip on the linked post.) Now Ashlee and Lindsay were seen arm and arm on November 9th and Star calls them the latest frenemies. (That’s such a popular word lately although it seems like I just learned it last week.)

Here is Ashlee getting takeout. Thanks to I’m Not Obsessed for these pics.

Ashlee Simpson had her first performace as Roxie Hart in the “Chicago” musical in London’s West End last night. Celeb-friendly Hello! magazine says it was top notch and that Ashlee delivered the goods in a live performance after getting busted lip synching just last year:

Since undergoing plastic surgery following her Marie Claire interview telling girls to accept their flaws, Ashlee has successfully reinvented herself. Big sister Jessica is in a bit of a slump with poor fashion choices and a high-profile divorce. Maybe Jessica she should get some advice from Ashlee on how to enjoy single life.

Meanwhile the Simpson sister’s controlling father/manager, Joe, is angering the co-producer of a new movie set to star Jessica, “Blonde Ambition.” “Malcolm in the Middle” star Justin Berfield is said to be annoyed with Simpson’s controlling ways, which may threaten the future of the film.

Here is Ashlee after her performance last night. [via]

A little plastic surgery can go a long way. It turns out that it was a rumor that Ashlee Simpson was offered $4 million to pose for Playboy and turned it down. It’s stranger than fiction, though, that Ashlee is going to be the new face of the Victoria’s Secret “pink” line. She is also moving in with her boyfriend and guitarist for her band, Braxton Olita:

I could see her getting naked, but someone is paying her to model lingerie? That’s too much. Everyone is saying that she’s hot now that she looks just like Jessica, but she’s still an ugly little girl to me.

Ashlee started her U.S. tour last month, and little girls in Chuck Taylors are eagerly awaiting her arrival in their city. She told concert-goers in Washington, DC that “It’s OK not to be perfect”:

It might be ok not to be perfect, but she must have learned that lesson too late to take back her plastic surgery.

Here is Ashlee in July’s Marie Claire and in Elle UK. [via]