If you have children, you were probably subjected to Nickelodeon’s 25th Annual Kid’s Choice Awards ceremony on Saturday night. You have my sincerest condolences. I, too, had to watch, and it was often eyeroll-inducing: lame banter between celebrity presenters; boring and unfunny “behind the scenes” skits; stupid slime stunts that dragged out the show even longer and wayyyy too much Disney product, in the form of Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers. Miley Cyrus won favorite female television star and favorite female musical artist, much to my daughter’s delight.

There were a few bright spots in the broadcast, including host Jack Black’s over-the-top opening musical number, in which he wore a bright green superhero costume and rocked out with a giant octopus playing guitar to the Kiss song “I Was Made for Loving You,” with the lyrics changed to “I Was Made for Sliming You.” (In my opinion, Black was the only funny, high-energy part of the show and should have been allowed to riff and get crazy even more.) The theme of each Kids’ Choice Awards, you see, is that celebs and kids in the audience get buckets of green slime poured on their heads at random moments. Slimed celebs included Harrison Ford, who recreated a famous scene from “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” which concluded with him being covered in green slime. Other mildly amusing segments included a celebrity belching contest that featured Jodie Foster attempting to burp along to the song “YMCA.”

All in all, the show had the same problems as most other awards shows: it went on too long, there was too much unfunny dialog, and the host didn’t get enough chances to do what he does best. But if you are at all interested in the winners, here they are.

Favorite TV Show: Drake and Josh
Favorite Reality Show: American Idol
Favorite TV Actor: Drake Bell (from Drake and Josh)
Favorite TV Actress: Miley Cyrus
Favorite Cartoon: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Favorite Movie: Alvin and the Chipmunks
Favorite Movie Actor: Johnny Depp
Favorite Movie Actress: Jessica Alba
Favorite Animated Movie: Ratatouille
Favorite Animated Voice: Eddie Murphy (Shrek The Third)
Favorite Music Group: The Jonas Brothers
Favorite Song: “Girlfriend” by Avril Lavigne
Favorite Female Singer: Miley Cyrus
Favorite Male Singer: Chris Brown
Favorite Male Athlete: Tony Hawk
Favorite Female Athlete: Danica Patrick
Favorite Book: Harry Potter Series
Favorite Video Game: Madden NFL 2008
Wannabe Award: Cameron Diaz

If anything, the Kids’ Choice Awards gives parents a glimpse into the music, movies, and other pop culture their kids like– which should scare the crap out of you. I know I had a hard time sleeping knowing that the youth of America wants to be just like Cameron Diaz.

Jennifer Love Hewitt and her fiance, Ross McCall, are planning what they call an “intimate” ceremony for their upcoming wedding. Though Jennifer won’t give details about the date or location - probably to avoid the nasty comments of Internet bloggers who might make fun of her backside or something - she did say that she and Ross want something romantic but low-key.

Jennifer Love Hewitt is already plotting out her upcoming wedding to Scottish actor Ross McCall.

“You know Diana and Charles – it’s going to be a little like that!” she joked with Usmagazine.com at SBE’s The Abbey on Sunday.

Kidding aside, “it is going to be small and private and romantic and wonderful,” Hewitt, 29, told Us. “We have nothing picked out yet.”

“We are very low-key people,” McCall, 32, added. “If we kind of wake up and say, ‘Let’s go do it,’ that’s how we will do it.”

The actress — who met McCall on the set of her CBS show Ghost Whisperer — got engaged in November, around the time those controversial bikini photos of her surfaced.

“We fell in love,” she told Us of how she spent her downtime during the recent writers’ strike. “We had a lot of fun, did a lot of traveling.”

So was it love at first sight for the pair?

“Absolutely,” Hewitt told Us. “As soon as I saw him.”

[From Us Weekly]

I never thought much of Jennifer before Bikinigate, but she has really conducted herself with dignity, class and a sense of humor since then. I’m rooting for her to be able to pull off this wedding without too much privacy invasion, and for the marriage itself to work. That said, you will not catch me watching “The Ghost Whisperer.”

Note by Celebitchy: In honor of Hewitt’s upcoming nuptuals, here’s a link to our very first post of her out with Ross McCall on her 27th birthday almost two years ago. McCall is Scottish and I bet he has the cutest accent.

Photos are from “The Envelope Please” 7th Annual Oscar Viewing Party on 2/24/08, thanks to PRPhotos.

80s fantasy chick and Weird Science babe Kelly LeBrock, now 47, lost 31 pounds on VH1’s Celebrity Fit Club back in 2005, but has since gained it back and says that the way she lost the weight wasn’t healthy. She told OK! Magazine that she’s “never going to diet again” and that she will “never eat lettuce again.”

Now I understand never dieting if it’s something that means starving for you, as long as you’re not talking about taking it to the extreme and eating huge portions of bad food, which would be someone’s prerogative I guess, but never eating lettuce? Maybe she just means that crappy iceberg lettuce that has no nutritional value, because there are a lot of different kinds of lettuce that make a nice salad and I can’t see swearing them all off.

OK! caught up with Kelly at the Oscar party Night of 100 Stars, where she was fighting mad — because, she said, a nasty magazine recently implied she was fat.

“I’m not fat!” Kelly declared. “I don’t look like a 400-pound heifer! I’m going to keep eating. I eat normally. And I’ve had three kids.”

She added that actresses like herself, “have to be role models for all these young girls” so they don’t become scary skinny.

Two years ago, Kelly, now 47, lost a total of 31 pounds on the VH-1 reality show Celebrity Fit Club, but the Weird Science star found dieting just wasn’t right for her. “I didn’t eat for three months,” she explains. “It was dangerous. It was a really bad way to lose weight. I will never eat lettuce again!”

[From OK! Magazine]

LeBrock said that she doesn’t weigh herself and that “If I can fit into a ten/twelve, I’m happy.”

If she’s happy and comfortable with herself, and from the looks of that plunging neckline on her dress she is, that’s all that matters. She looks fine apart from those chemically enhanced lips and not everyone has to be a stick. We do need more normal-sized actresses as role models, but it’s not like she gets much exposure.

There are health issues associated with being moderately overweight, and a lot of the articles I consulted about this stated that “studies show that by losing as little as 10 to 20 pounds you can dramatically improve your overall health status.”

So maybe she thinks dieting means starving yourself and eating only iceberg lettuce, but it also means getting more vegetables and maybe cutting some of those empty carbs in favor of more nutritional food.

Jennifer Love Hewitt recently said that she’s not going to exercise just to look good, and that she’ll do it for her health and so that she can live a long and happy life. That sounds like a more sensible approach to all this body criticism instead of just saying “f’ck it”

Jennifer Love Hewitt is shown at “The Envelope Please” 7th Annual Oscar Viewing Party and Kelly LeBrock is shown at Night of 100 Stars Gala Viewing Party both on 2/24/08, thanks to PRPhtoos.

Ghost Whisperer star Jennifer Love Hewitt is negotiating with the networks to have her own daytime talk show. She wants to create an inspirational show that is aimed at young women.

[Jennifer Love Hewitt] is in talks with different networks to headline her own daytime show, a source tells Star exclusively. “Jennifer has always admired Oprah Winfrey’s ability to inspire people and hopes to do the same, especially for young girls,” says the source. “She really wants to be a positive role model.”

[From Star Magazine, print edition, January 21, 2008]

A talkshow seems like a very risky venture, but if anyone can do it’s Love Hewitt, and it’s certainly a better career strategy than a reality tv show. Love Hewitt is known for her caring and empathic personality, which could be put to good use on a television show if it’s presented well.

There was a really cute story about Love Hewitt a couple of years ago in which she said she often tries her best to help elderly people who confuse her with her character on television. She said she once spoke with a 75 year-old woman for 20 minutes before she realized the woman was talking about her deceased husband and asking her for help contacting him. Love-Hewitt said “I was broken-hearted because I didn’t know how to be the Ghost Whisperer in real life.”

As for Britney’s latest troubles, Love Hewitt said that she feels bad that people judge her and thinks that they should try to help instead of making the problem worse, “I feel bad because everyone kind of judges her and splatters her business everywhere. No one goes, ‘Why is this happening?’ They just judge and judge and judge. It’s too bad.”

She seems like she would make an excellent talkshow host, but they may need a sidekick or some other way to give her a little more presence with the guests. She’s got that “too nice” vibe about her, but it definitely comes off as genuine and that’s rare.

Love-Hewitt, 28, is engaged to her boyfriend of nearly two years, Scottish actor Ross McCall, 32.

Jennifer Love Hewitt is shown at the 7th Annual Awards Season Diamond Fashion Show Preview on 1/10/08, thanks to PRPhotos.

The Daily Mail is running their typical flaw-finding piece on these photos of 51 year-old Kim Cattrall filming a beach scene for the Sex and the City movie. She looks pretty good, but they’re obligated to point out her “skin condition.” They call the article “Cellulite and the City”:

The actress’ massive bikini bottoms failed to hide the dimpled truth, as her cellulite was plainly on show while she filmed scenes on the Malibu beach.

As the blonde star strode along the beach, gold stilettos in hand, despite retaining a still enviable figure, her thighs showed the tell-tale signs of the dreaded skin condition which defeats many women.

[From The Daily Mail]

How ridiculous to say cellulite “defeats” many women, as if we’re unable to get out of bed because our asses aren’t smooth like the airbrushed 19 year-olds in magazines. Maybe they could say “afflicts,” but that sounds like a disease. How about “affects,” but it’s not like it’s affecting our ability to care for our children, do our jobs (unless we’re models or movie stars) or even to don a swimsuit. This shit is getting out of hand.

Meanwhile one of the prettiest young television actresses, Jennifer Love Hewitt, answered some questions on the red carpet of 27 Dresses about her bikini controversy. She said “It made me feel a little embarrassed to be honest. It made me a little sad. It hurt my feelings.. And I think we should let people be!”

Many people were saying that Love Hewitt claimed to be a size 2 after she was criticized for her regular sized body, but she never said that. She was simply talking about the issue of body image and when her words are read in context you can tell that she’s just criticizing the unrealistic standards that are set on women.

Jennifer Love Hewitt is proud of her normal-sized hotness, but she’s not about to tarnish her image or let us know her grooming habits by posing nude in Playboy. Aging lothario Hugh Hefner offered the Ghost Whisperer star a “substantial amount” to pose for the men’s magazine after he saw her bikini pictures, according to In Touch, but her rep confirms that she turned it down. US Weekly reports that no money offers were given, though.

Hewitt sort-of bared all for a Hanes ad that JayBird points out was heavily airbrushed. She could do a similar semi-clothed spread for Playboy. That might cheapen her image and you can’t blame her for turning it down, although if it was seven figures she should go topless at least. It’s not like the checks are coming in. I mean she’s got Ghost Whisperer until it’s derailed by the writer’s strike, but her last movie was Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties. Let’s see - working on a talking cat movie for weeks or baring your boobs for a photoshoot that lasts a few hours? It’s not a hard decision.

Jennifer Love Hewitt’s next movie will be about a hooker housewife scandal in a small town in Texas. It seems like she missed a great opportunity to promote the film with a nude pictorial.

Jennifer Love Hewitt is shown out on 12/5/07, thanks to Splash News. One of her Hanes ads is below.

What week is complete without at least two good pregnancy rumors floating around? Angelina gets knocked up at least three times a month, and I’d guess that Jennifer Aniston trails behind her at once a fortnight. Yeah pregnancy rumors are tracked in fortnights – gossip websites are very old fashioned that way. A lot of sites were abuzz with the gossip that Jennifer Love Hewitt was pregnant. Celebitchy noted:

Jennifer Love Hewitt may have had a pressing reason to get engaged to her boyfriend of nearly two years, Scottish actor Ross McCall. Star Magazine is claiming that the well-liked Ghost Whisperer star is pregnant. The story is pretty scant on details, so it could be mere speculation, but they say that Ross and Jennifer went to Hawaii in part to celebrate her pregnancy. The article doesn’t make it clear whether the engagement was prompted by Jennifer’s maybe-pregnancy, and just says she found out she was expecting “around the same time” that she got engaged.

Well according to Hewitt’s PR rep, she’s not pregnant. It sounds like people just jumped on the idea because she was called chunky and got engaged at the same time. Just coincidental timing, folks, she’s not knocked up.

Following her recent bikini scandal, Jennifer Love Hewitt is making headlines again in the blogosphere.

Sites were buzzing today that Hewitt, 28, and her fiancé, Scottish actor Ross McCall, 32, are expecting their first child in June.

But her rep tells Usmagazine.com: “Jennifer is not pregnant.”

Still, all seems well for Hewitt and McCall, who recently gave her an antique engagement ring. They were all smiles as they headed to a holiday party at Morton’s Steak House in Burbank, California, on Sunday.

[From Us Weekly]

I can’t say why, but JLH (that’s what I’m calling her from now on – her name is just too long and too ridiculous) strikes me as someone who’d be a good mom, whenever the time comes. She handled the whole “fat” scandal with a lot of grace. I wouldn’t want to be her PR rep right now – that must be one busy woman, constantly fielding “how fat is your client?” and “how pregnant is your client?” calls. Hopefully the drama is near an end, and Jennifer can just celebrate getting engaged.

Picture note by Jaybird: Header image of a newly-engaged Jennifer Love Hewitt and Ross McCall vacationing in Hawaii with a parrot. Images thanks to Splash Photos.

Jennifer Love Hewitt may have had a pressing reason to get engaged to her boyfriend of nearly two years, Scottish actor Ross McCall. Star Magazine is claiming that the well-liked Ghost Whisperer star is pregnant. The story is pretty scant on details, so it could be mere speculation, but they say that Ross and Jennifer went to Hawaii in part to celebrate her pregnancy. The article doesn’t make it clear whether the engagement was prompted by Jennifer’s maybe-pregnancy, and just says she found out she was expecting “around the same time” that she got engaged.

Ross, 31,… surprised Jennifer when he popped the question with an engagement ring that has been in his family for 100 years. Around the same time, the Texas beauty learned that she was pregnant!

While a rep for Jen denies she’s expecting, the source says that to celebrate the terrific news, the couple jetted off to Hawaii.

[From Star Magazine, print edition, December 17, 2007]

I’m not holding my breath on this one, but it could be true. Jennifer had normal-sized women around the world cheering when she blogged that she was sick of the constant scrunity of women’s bodies in the media and that she was happy with her body as it is. She was responding to criticism over her average-sized body after she was photographed in a bikini in Hawaii with Ross. While she said that she was dealing with “photographers taking invasive pictures from bad angles,” it seemed to me like she was overstating her case, because I assumed the entire photo series was pre-arranged and staged by Hewitt. The pictures were way too posed and close up to be random photos taken by a paparrazo that trailed them all the way to Hawaii, but I guess it could have happened that way. Still, it doesn’t seem like Jennifer Love Hewitt is the level of celebrity that a photo agency would follow on vacation.

She may have been poised to tell the press that she’s annoyed that people criticize normal-sized women and I suspect that she set up the photos intending to do just that. She made an excellent point, though, and one that’s long overdue.

We’ll have to wait and see if she’s pregnant. If so, congratulations to one of the most down to earth and kind celebrities out there. I see Jennifer, Ross and the baby getting photographed as much as one of my other favorite celebrity couples, the Garner-Afflecks.

Jennifer Love Hewitt and Ross McCall are shown at the Scream Awards on 10/19/07, thanks to PRPhotos. Egotastic has the bikini photos, and she doesn’t look pregnant there, but it could be early on.

Boy the weight criticisms are really getting out of control in Hollywood lately. Ever since pictures of Jennifer Love Hewitt emerged where she had the nerve to look less-than-skeletal, everyone has been jumping on the bandwagon and trying to get their say in. Though it seems like most celebs have the common sense to only say positive things, clearly some people are thinking otherwise, or this wouldn’t be an issue and we wouldn’t still be hearing about it. Cindy Crawford got some critiques from the Daily Mail for her less-that-airbrushed (ie totally normal) stomach the other day, and now Janice Dickinson is calling Tyra Banks fat.

Tyra weathered her own fat storm a few months ago, when she was photographed looking a little “thick” during a beach vacation. I still don’t think she looked fat, per se, and a lot can be attributed to poor camera angles, harsh light, and a bad choice for a swimsuit. Tyra fought back by wearing the offending bathing suit on her show, showing she looked fine, normal, and healthy. She also compared how she looks now to how she looked as a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model years ago, and was photographed in the same bathing suit, showing that she’d changed a little, but not all that drastically. In all fairness, she was clearly retouched to within an inch of her life in the recent photo she did. She almost looked drawn. I’m not criticizing her body and I whole-heartedly appreciate her promoting healthy, realistic body images. But if that’s what she was really trying to do, she should have been secure enough to release the new photos with a normal amount of airbrushing. Showing us a cartoon and asking us to believe that’s how you really look is insulting, and it kills your argument.

Janice Dickinson – who I believe has inherited the Queen of Mean title from the recently deceased Leona Helmsley – was on the Today show yesterday to promote her reality show “The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency.” At one point, Al Roker asked her how she felt about the Jennifer Love Hewitt controversy. Dickinson was actually fairly kind.

They continued the streak today by inviting Janice Dickinson, the self-described first supermodel, and discussed whether a size 2 is fat. Janice defended Hewitt, called her “healthy” and “not emaciated.” She continued, “You want to see someone who’s fat, I’m sorry, Tyra, Tyra Banks is fat.” Banks used to be Dickinson’s boss in the early seasons of “America’s Next Top Model” and has herself been the subject of unflattering bathing suit photos.

After she was confronted by Al Roker about the remark, she sort of backed off, but it’s unclear if she was being genuine.

[From the Huffington Post]

It seemed like Dickinson just said that because she knew she’d be in a world of hurt if she didn’t. Though frankly she’s getting a ton of negative press for saying it at all. Even in the worst photo published, I think it’s unfair to call Tyra Banks fat. Our perception of how celebrities are supposed to look gets altered over time, and eventually we see a stick as normal. I imagine Tyra Banks looks perfectly healthy in real life. Last week I wrote an article about Carrie Underwood and her “healthy diet” tips. I noted that she had lost a lot of weight, but seemed okay as long as she didn’t lose anymore. Several commenters pointed out that she looks normal in pictures and normal for Hollywood, but that she would probably look alarmingly skinny in real life. And looking closer, I definitely agree. Once in a while you’ll see a photograph of a celebrity next to a regular person, and it’s shocking how tiny they are. It’s just that our points of reference get messed up, and you become accustomed to seeing a certain thing.

I appreciate Janice’s decent take on Jennifer Love Hewitt, but I hope she’ll come out and officially correct her statement regarding Tyra Banks. It’s for her own good; I would not want Tyra on my bad side.

Dickinson: ‘Hewitt is a healthy girl’

Note by Celebitchy: Someone is jealous of a former supermodel with a successful talkshow when they have to resort to reality shows and cheap tactics like this to get attention. Janice Dickinson is shown on 10/02/07 at the Fox Reality show awards. Tyra Banks is shown looking great at Fashion Week on 9/10/07 and at the CW Network Upfronts on 5/17/07, thanks to PRPhotos.

On Thursday we told you that Jennifer Love Hewitt got engaged, and that most of the press about her engagement focused instead on recent unflattering pictures of her in a bikini. I thought the criticisms were a too harsh – no one looks as good as they do when they’ve got professional lighting, fuzzy lenses, and retouchers. But as a result of all the professional lighting, fuzzy lenses, and retouchers, our perception of how people are “supposed” to look becomes skewed. Though there were a few commenters who called her fat/overweight/unhealthy, it seems that the majority of you believe that Jennifer has a nice and normal body. She’s certainly put on weight in the last ten years, but who has the exact same body they did at eighteen?

In the last few years Jennifer has ignored the bad press her curvy figure has received, but finally felt the need to respond to all the hate going around about her ass. On her website Jennifer wrote:

This is the last time I will address this subject. I’ve sat by in silence for a long time now about the way women’s bodies are constantly scrutinized. To set the record straight, I’m not upset for me, but for all of the girls out there that are struggling with their body image. A size 2 is not fat! Nor will it ever be. And being a size 0 doesn’t make you beautiful.

What I should be doing is celebrating some of the best days of my life and my engagement to the man of my dreams, instead of having to deal with photographers taking invasive pictures from bad angles. I know what I look like, and so do my friends and family. And like all women out there should, I love my body.

To all girls with butts, boobs, hips and a waist, put on a bikini – put it on and stay strong.

[From safesearching.com/jenniferlovehewitt]

I’m not sure if Jennifer was saying that a size 2 isn’t fat as a general rule, or saying that she’s a size 2 and not fat. I think she just put her sentences in a funny order that makes it a bit confusing. Regardless, it’s pretty clear that she has a healthy body image and a good perspective. She points out that she’s just gotten engaged, and people aren’t even talking about that – they’re talking about her ass. I think she looks gorgeous and will make a beautiful, healthy and happy bride.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Jennifer Love Hewitt and Ross McCall are shown in Hawaii this weekend, thanks to Splash News.