Ah, crusty love. Is it just me, or do they look a little less crusty than usual? These are some newish photos of John Mellencamp and Meg Ryan in NYC yesterday or the say before. Meg’s clothes fit! I like her coat too. Can I just say something that I’ve only recently noticed – despite my jokes about how John and Meg are “crusty” (like, they never shower and they always look smelly to me), I think they may be good for each other. Meg’s face looks less jacked, right? She may even be trying to go natural, or natural-ish. Whatever is going on, it’s an improvement, and I hope John is actively encouraging The Natural Meg.

John’s divorce is final now – he’s been single and ready to mingle since August. The Enquirer keeps running stories about how Meg and John are always just about to marry, but they still haven’t, and I haven’t heard anything about wedding plans from any other outlet. So… I don’t know if it’s on, or if they’ll just be together without getting hitched. I tend to think that Meg is the one who is gun-shy about marriage, and John might want to make it official. Still, they are definitely loved up – Meg has been following him around like a groupie all year. Ah, crusty groupie, crusty love.

Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.

It’s been a quiet but close summer for crusty lovers John Mellencamp and Meg Ryan. They’re been keeping a lower profile, and they’ve only really gotten pap’d while they were on a romantic holiday in Rome, back in July. Before that, John and Meg (I first typed “Meh” which was so appropriate) had been announcing their love through a series of photo ops in the Spring, just after John dumped his wife Elaine. Rumors were pretty strong that there was some overlap between when he was ending it with Elaine and when he was starting up with Meg, but no matter. Meg got her man! She won the Jumpoff Prize! And she’s about to cash in, I think. John and Elaine’s divorce was just finalized on Friday:

Rocker John Mellencamp and his estranged wife, model Elaine Irwin Mellencamp, are officially divorced. The couple, who were wed for 18 years and have two sons – Hud, 17, and Speck, 16 – separated on Sept. 1, 2010, and he filed for divorce on Jan. 14. Their divorce, his third, was formalized on Aug. 12.

The couple negotiated “an amicable settlement of all issues involving property and maintenance rights, the custody and support of their children, and all other issues,” according the settlement agreement.

They will share joint legal custody of the boys, with their mother – who will return to the name Elaine Irwin – having primary physical custody. John will pay child support and for their schooling. No other specifics of their 31-page confidential final settlement agreement were made public.

In court papers, Mellencamp said the marriage was “irretrievably broken.” Indiana is a “no-fault” state, meaning a couple can divorce for almost any reason.

The Mellencamps lived in a 56-acre estate in Lake Monroe, Ind., which is close to Bloomington. Both had said they planned to stay in Indiana, where “they will continue to raise their children,” his rep said in January.

Since the split, John Mellencamp, 59, has been dating Meg Ryan, and the pair have been spotted around Martha’s Vineyard, New York City and Bloomington.

In addition to the two boys with Irwin, Mellencamp has three other children.

[From People]

Does it follow that as soon as the ink is dry on these divorce papers, John will be able to get hitched to his jumpoff? Perhaps. The Enquirer (who has consistently accurate sources on this matter) claims that John and Meg were planning to get married as soon as his divorce came through, and personally, I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw Meg with a ring by the end of the year. Yay for jumpoffs!

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Aw, crusty love! Crusty ITALIAN love. Here are some new photos of Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp in Rome, Italy this week. Meg brought her daughter Daisy, John brought his smokes, and they’re all having a grand old time. I actually can’t complain too much about these photos, because I honestly, genuinely find them cute. Here. Nowhere else. Rome agrees with them, and I like seeing the two of them being affectionate (and crusty). There are a few photos where Meg seems like the Sienna Miller of the relationship – you know, the “Pay attention to me! We have to be touching! We have to be canoodling! You have to pay attention to me at all times or you don’t really love me” type of woman. But as the photo set went on, it just seems like John might be a little drunk and Meg is just being sweet to him. I especially like the photo of his head on her shoulder.

At one point, as they were sitting on this little bench, a dude came over and tried to sell John a red rose for his lady. John and Meg both refused the flower, reportedly telling the flower salesman “Romance is dead.” Okay, that’s not so sweet. Meh.

One of the last reports about Meg and John was that they were planning a quick wedding just as soon as his divorce from his third wife, Elaine, comes through. That WAS supposed to be this month. Meg’s rep denied the story at the time, but I still think there’s a good chance these crusty lovers will make it official at some point. They’ve been together all year now – well, actually, they probably got together last year, but officially it’s just this year. Will Meg jump into a marriage with a dude who refuses to buy her a red rose?

Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.

Last we heard from our favorite crusty lovers Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp, they were still going strong, they were loved up all over the country, and John had maybe asked Meg to get pre-engaged. It’s the Jumpoff Fairytale! According to this week’s Enquirer, John has stepped up and actually proposed to Meg for real. And she accepted, and they’re planning July nuptials. So what’s the problem? John’s not technically divorced yet. Of course, he was still technically married when they hooked up, so this too shall pass, Meg. By the way, for those you who think I’m using “crusty lovers” as a cut on their ages, I’m not. I’m saying “crusty” because that’s how they LOOK. Like they haven’t bathed. Like they smell bad. Dumb hippies.

Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp are planning a July wedding, the Enquirer has learned exclusively – but there may be a problem. He’s still married!

When the couple recently revealed their marriage plans to family members, “John’s children were shocked,” said a family insider. “They don’t think their dad should be getting married so quickly. But she’s telling them that Meg is the woman he always wanted and that’s that.”

John filed for divorce from Elaine Irwin in January. However the split has not yet been legally finalized. The breakup came shortly after John and Meg were photographed walking arm-in-arm in New York, although sources said Elaine has been upset for years over John’s wandering eye.

Since then, John and Meg have been inseparable. Meg attends all of John’s concerts and recently they were spotted on a romantic getaway in Cancun. Even though Meg’s publicist denies there are wedding plans, the insider insists the couple is already working up a guest list for the nuptials, which john wants to have at his Indiana estate.

“Jennifer Aniston and Kenny Chesney are already on the list,” said the insider. “John is planning to throw a huge party outdoors on his property, right by Lake Monroe, which is adjacent. He’ll be performing with his band and so will a lot of his musician friends.

But John will have to quickly finalize his divorce so the wedding can go off as planned. He is trying to end things amicably with Elaine: “He’s saying he’s going to invite Elaine to the wedding.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition]

Oh, that should be divine. I hope he DOES invite his new ex-wife to his wedding with his jumpoff. And I hope Elaine goes, gets tanked, and decides to toast the happy, crusty couple. They should sell tickets.

By the way, Meg’s rep denied the July wedding story to E! News. But I don’t much stock in that, considering Meg’s rep also issued a half-assed denial about her relationship with John AFTER they had been photographed together, looking crusty and loved-up. So, will this marriage happen? Considering that Elaine will be John’s THIRD ex-wife, I’d say that he’s one of those dudes who always has to be in a relationship. You know those guys. The ones who can’t be alone for two seconds or they fall apart. That’s John. So I’d say that as soon as he’s officially divorced, he’s probably going to try to marry Meg.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

And they said it wouldn’t last! And by “they” I mean “me”. These are new photos of Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp in LA yesterday – the first new photos we’ve had of them in a little while. Did they realize that they were coming across as kind of gross with their daily photo-ops when John first dumped his wife? Perhaps.

Anyway, Meg Ryan really has won the Jumpoff Prize, hasn’t she? John Mellencamp dumps his wife and takes up with Meg, and they’re still going strong after… what? Like, six months? That’s pretty good, though. Hey, at least his jumpoff isn’t some 20-something “trainer” or something, right? He likes his women like… this. Forty-nine years old and wearing a belly shirt. Ugh.

According to onlookers, “As they strolled on Melrose Ave., Meg and John could barely keep their hands off of each other despite the paparazzi presence.” The were also recently spotted in NYC a few days ago. According to a NY Post report, they were “kissing and canoodling” as they ate at Breslin Bar & Dining Room. It seems that Meg “couldn’t be happier. Not only has she got a great new guy, she’s back in the headlines. It’s not easy going from being one of the highest paid actresses in the world to an anonymous New Yorker. Meg’s loving all this attention again. Meg would much rather be back on the cover of the magazines announcing a hit new movie, but unfortunately that isn’t the case. Now folks are much more interested in your private life than if you have a hit movie. Look at Kate Gosselin or Kim Kardashian. They are always on magazine covers talking about their love life.” Is that who Meg thinks she’s “competing” with? Kim Kardashian and Kate Gosselin? Oh, Meg.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Considering that I was completely wrong in my assessment of this “crusty love” couple at the beginning, I now feel the need to believe every tabloid report about them. When John Mellencamp initially dumped his wife of 18 years, and the rumors started bouncing around that Meg Ryan was the jumpoff, I honestly thought it was crap. It wasn’t. They declared their love through photo-ops, and there were lots of reports that there was some overlap between John’s marriage and his relationship to Meg. And of course, when the Enquirer got a hold of John and asked him about his temperamental douche ways, and his womanizing ways, his answer was a trail of expletives. Guilty! Anyway, Star Magazine has a report about John and Meg and how they are “pre-engaged”. Ugh.

Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp are headed to the altar!

“They are happily telling friends that are ‘pre-engaged’,” a source tells Star. John asked Meg to wait for him while he divorces his wife of 18 years, model Elaine Irwin. In the meantime, the rocker gave the actress a ring that belonged to his grandmother. And after just three months, the lovebirds are shacking up together in her Bel Air mansion.

“John’s had a crush on Meg for years, so this is a fantasy come true for him,” says the source. And Meg’s just as in love.

“She sees a future with John,” the source adds. “They’re trying to be hush-hush for now, but there’s no way they can hide the intensity of their relationship.”

[From Star Magazine, print edition]

As I said, I’ll believe it. Why not? What’s surprising to me is how open this jumpoff situation has been – and I think the photo-ops prove that they’re not ashamed of their crusty love. My favorite part of Star’s report is “John asked Meg to wait for him while he divorces his wife of 18 years, model Elaine Irwin.” Like he had to ask! Like Meg has so much to do these days.

Meanwhile, a few weeks ago Elaine spoke to Us Weekly about the split, but not the jumpoff: “The only thing certain in life is change itself…Change is good, some would say it is our greatest teacher, and I am embracing it.” Sure. She must be quietly thrilled that she doesn’t have to have sex with John again, right?

Photos courtesy of Fame.

Over the past few weeks, we’ve been hearing a lot about Meg Ryan’s new (new-ish) relationship with John Mellencamp. First was the random report that John and Meg were hitting it, and that Meg was the reason for his divorce from his wife of 17 years, Elaine. Then came the confirmation of their relationship, via People Magazine. Then they trotted out for an unsexy photo op. One of the last major pieces of gossip was that John Mellencamp is no prize – that he’s a temperamental, womanzing douche and that Meg is just the latest in a long line of mistresses he’s had over the years. Anyway, PopEater’s gossip guy is claiming that Meg couldn’t be happier with the turn of events. Yes, even though everyone is throwing her the “homewrecker” side-eye, Meg is just thrilled that we still know who she is. Hm.

Meg Ryan isn’t just loving the attention of her new boyfriend, rocker John Mellencamp, she’s also enjoying being back in the public eye, as more than two years have passed since her last major film release, the star-studded ‘The Women.’

“Meg couldn’t be happier,” a friend of the actress tells me. “Not only has she got a great new guy, she’s back in the headlines. It’s not easy going from being one of the highest paid actresses in the world to an anonymous New Yorker. Meg’s loving all this attention again.”

The newly formed couple hasn’t exactly been trying to hide their love as they’ve been seen strolling through [New York's] West Village and spending time on Martha’s Vineyard. And now insiders tell me the two of them are in talks with a major magazine to do a photo shoot together.

“Meg would much rather be back on the cover of the magazines announcing a hit new movie, but unfortunately that isn’t the case,” an insider tells me.

The 49-year-old beauty is fully aware how the world of celebrity has changed since she was burning up the box office in landmark hits like ‘Sleepless in Seattle’ and ‘You’ve Got Mail.’

“Now folks are much more interested in your private life than if you have a hit movie,” the insider says. “Look at Kate Gosselin or Kim Kardashian. They are always on magazine covers talking about their love life.”

[From PopEater]

Wait, they want to do a photo shoot together? What exactly would they be promoting? Crusty love? Ugh. And didn’t they already do a photo shoot together? Oh, I’m sorry. I meant “every photo agency just happened to ‘catch’ them together magically.”

And you know what? I’m old enough to remember when Meg Ryan was relevant. When producers were just dying to work with her and she got tons of film offers. I also remember how she was back then – surly. Like, she didn’t want the attention. She wanted people to see her as an “actress” not as America’s Sweetheart. She really aimed to be more private. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Now she’s a washed up has-been with a jacked face who acts like she just won the jumpoff prize. It’s kind of sad.

Photos courtesy of WENN & Fame.

As we’ve already seen this week, Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp did the official rollout of their new (-ish) relationship. First was a People Magazine story with quotes from a “source” close to Meg Ryan which verified various gossip about Meg basically being John’s jumpoff. According to Meg the source, however, the relationship started after John and his wife Elaine were already separated. After the People Magazine piece, John and Meg stepped out for one of the unsexiest photo ops ever – John was unshaven, smoking a cig, and Meg looked like a sixty-year-old, Joker-faced Annie Hall. Anyway, the Enquirer has the story I was waiting for – a piece sympathetic towards John’s estranged wife Elaine. According to the Enquirer’s sources, John has been screwing around on Elaine for a while, and Elaine just took it. But John openly flaunting his relationship with Meg was a ho too far, apparently. Oh, but the best part is where the Enquirer contacts John for a comment, and then they print his comment complete with “bleeps”.

John Mellencamp’s 18-year-marriage blew up over his relationship with Meg Ryan – but those close to the superstar rocker say his wife has been upset for year over his wandering eye.

Sources close to his family tell The Enquirer that John’s wife Elaine, 41, moved out of their Indiana home after John and Meg were photographed walking arm-in-arm in New York.

“Elaine has gone through hell,” said a close source. “I’m sure John has had intimate relationships with other women, but I think Elaine turned a blind eye until it was publicly revealed that he’d become close to Meg.”

John also has a nasty temper, according to the source. “John has had screaming matches with Elaine and their staff for years. He’s been known to hurl plates of food at the TV if he didn’t like what was being said,” the close source divulged.

When the Enquirer contacted Mellencamp to ask for his side of the story regarding the split, he raged: “What the —- is this! What are doing calling my cell phone, man? You want me to whip your ass? I’ll come down there and whip your —— ass. Call my —— publicist.”

When we contacted Elaine, she said, “I can’t imagine discussing personal matters like these with a complete stranger.”

Despite their formal statements of amicability, an insider reveals: “Elaine has simply had enough. When it looked as if John started flaunting his relationship with Meg, she walked out. It’s going to be a massively expensive divorce. Elaine is going to take him to the cleaners, but in my opinion, he deserves it.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition]

Ugh, John is not coming across well. And what the hell is going on with Meg? Was she always this strange, or has the Botox just leeched into her brain? I mean… most people still can’t forgive her for dumping Dennis Quaid and hooking up with Russell Crowe, but at least you could understand that – that was back when Russell was fine as hell, and every woman wanted a piece of that. But John? Who understands that attraction? Who looks at John and says “Compulsive womanizing douche who verbally abuses everyone? Damn, let me break up THAT marriage!”

Photos courtesy of Fame and WENN.

Yesterday, Meg Ryan took her new lover John Mellencamp out for a little photo op. I seriously think they must have called every photo agency and paparazzi they knew, because these photos are everywhere. I guess this is what new couples do now to announce their relationship. The old way – walking on red carpet together – isn’t available, because Meg barely works anymore (because of her jacked face). Anyway, the body language: Meg is all “Can you bitches shut up about how I’m a homewrecker now?” and John is all “Whatevs, I got my jumpoff and my cig, it’s all good.”

By the way, CB wants me to point out the smoking thing specifically. Apparently, back in 2009, John’s 14-year-old son used Facebook to wage a campaign to get his dad to stop smoking. Looks like that took, right? Do you think his son is kicking himself a little bit, thinking that he was maybe focused on the wrong thing? I mean, we still haven’t heard anything from John’s estranged wife Elaine, but I’m seriously waiting for her side of things.

Also – what the hell is Meg wearing? Ugh.

Photos courtesy of Fame.

I hate being wrong. I especially hate making a bad call about a wife-dumping/jumpoff-grabbing situation. On Sunday, I WRONGLY made a judgment call and gave John Mellencamp the benefit of the doubt regarding the report that John had basically dumped his model-wife Elaine after 20 years of marriage, all for Meg Ryan’s jacked face. Well, I’m sorry. I apologize for giving Mellencamp the benefit of the doubt. He’s a jag. I shall never make the same mistake again. So… People Magazine just put up this story – a confirmation that John spent New Year’s with his jumpoff, Meg Ryan. It’s looking more and more like this is the formal rollout for John and Meg as a couple, and more and more like Meg was in the picture when John and Elaine were still very much married:

The new year brings new beginnings for Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp.

The pair have spent time together on Martha’s Vineyard and in New York City in recent days, enjoying a fresh romance just as Mellencamp has announced his separation from wife Elaine after 18 years of marriage.

A source close to Ryan, 49, says the actress and the rock star, 59, began dating about seven weeks ago, and that Mellencamp and his wife had been separated for some time before that.

The pair have been spotted having coffee at Espresso Love, one of Ryan’s favorite spots on the Vineyard, and grocery shopping at Gourmet Garage in New York’s SoHo neighborhood – where observers tell PEOPLE they seemed happy and at ease.

“She usually comes in by herself or with her daughter. I thought that was her husband because they seemed for comfortable and familiar with each other, just like an old married couple,” one observer says.

Mellencamp has been married three times and has five children, including two sons with Elaine.

Ryan has been married once, to actor Dennis Quaid. They divorced in 2001 after 10 years of marriage. They have a son, Jack Henry, who is 18. Ryan also has a daughter, Daisy True, 6, whom she adopted from China.

[From People]

“A source close to Ryan, 49, says the actress and the rock star, 59, began dating about seven weeks ago, and that Mellencamp and his wife had been separated for some time before that.” So… a “source close to Ryan” confirmed that John and Elaine were separated for months? I’ll be very interested in seeing if a “source close to Elaine” has a different take on the state of the marriage, won’t you?

Photos courtesy of WENN.