Stylish Celebrity Escapism
Contributing Writers




Mar 14
'08
Former pimp Snoop Dogg gives advice to Elliot Spitzer

snoopdogg1.jpg
Snoop Dogg was on “The View” this morning to promote his new reality show “Father Hood” on E! and he charmed every woman on that panel.

He talked about his new CD, Ego Trippin, in which he sings and mixes genres such as R&B and even country.

Barbara Walters mentioned that Snoop is no longer doing only gangster rap, and that he’s matured. She said “no more gangs, no more pot,” and he said “I didn’t say that!” She asked what vices he’s given up since becoming a responsible dad. Snoop said he doesn’t drink, but that he has a medical condition he didn’t specify and that he needs medical marijuana. Joy mentioned glaucoma and Snoop scrunched up his eyes and said “I can’t see that good!”

Barbara pressed “What you’re saying it’s only medical marijuana.”
Snoop: “Only medical, no street weed… I have a license and everything”

They show a clip of Snoop doing yoga on his reality show and Joy says “he’s stoned, that’s why he’s lying like that.”

Snoop said that every strong man has a strong woman and that his wife runs the house and takes care of everything.

Joy Behar then brought up the fact that Snoop is a former pimp and asked him for advice for governor Spitzer.

Snoop said “It’s too late for advice now. If he’d seen me before… it would have been real discrete and would not have exposed his game. He would still be able to be client number nine.”

Whoopi then questioned Snoop about guys dating his daughter in the future that might be like he was in the past and he said “I can’t fix what I’ve done in the past, all I can do is be better today.”

Snoop talked about his youth football league and also confirmed that he’ll be a guest on the soap opera “One Life to Live,” and said he got hooked on soaps when he was young and got suspended from school a lot. According to the Miami Herald, his episodes will air May 8 and 9.

Snoop mentioned his clothing lines for women, men, and dogs, and said he’s just trying to give everyone some of that Snoop Kool aid.

Here’s the full interview with Snoop. Why do I have a crush on this guy?

Here’s the short clip where he gives advice to Spitzer.

And his performance:

Snoop is shown performing on 2/28/08, thanks to PRPhotos. Thanks so much to Redlasso for these clips.

snoopdogg2.jpg

Posted in Eliot Spitzer, Snoop Dogg, The View

Written by Celebitchy         17 Comments »
Jan 22
'08
David Beckham visits Sierra Leone

beckhamfood1.jpg

Apparently David Beckham is quite the humanitarian. Though he’s most famous for being married to Posh… and something about football… he’s actually been a UNICEF ambassador for seven years. Who knew? He and Posh also have their own charity, but supposedly they don’t do it for publicity, which is why the rest of us haven’t heard much about it. Beckham hasn’t done a lot of UNICEF stuff lately, so he decided to go to Sierra Leone to draw attention to the impoverished country, which has the highest rate of child deaths in the world.

“We can’t turn a blind eye to the tens of thousands of young children who die every day in the developing world mostly from causes that are preventable,” added the father-of-three. “In Sierra Leone, one in four children dies before reaching their fifth birthday — it’s shocking and tragic especially when the solutions are simple,” said Beckham.

Measures that could be taken to tackle the problem include vaccinating against measles or using a mosquito net to reduce the chances of getting malaria. “Saving these children’s lives is a top priority for UNICEF and as an ambassador I hope I can help to draw attention to this issue across the world,” said the LA Galaxy star, who spent four days in Sierra Leone.

[From the Agence France-Presse]

Though I’m always a little skeptical when celebrities suddenly become do-gooders, it appears David Beckham has being one for quite some time. He’s just been fairly quiet about it, and actually focuses on the cause, and not attaching his name to it. Beckham said the only reason he’s doing so much publicity for UNICEF and Sierra Leone is because his role for the agency is to bring attention and publicity to the problem.

In absolutely ridiculous David Beckham gossip, supposedly he will be joining good friend Snoop Dogg and rapping on one of Snoop’s upcoming tracks. David Beckham might be rapping with Snoop Dogg on a new track if rumours are anything to go by. The BFFs have so far designed a slipper together. So the next logical step is rap.

The source says: “Snoop thought it’d be a laugh and David is going to give it a real go. They are huge names so the song’s bound to be a hit - even if it’s no good.”

[From Angry Ape]

Even if it’s no good? Well at least they’re keeping their expectations low. Expect an update with a complete denial by one of their reps in the next three hours.

Picture note by Jaybird: David Beckham is shown at his youth soccer clinic on 8/17/07. Images thanks to PR Photos.

beckhamfood4.jpg

Posted in David Beckham, Good Causes, Good deeds, Snoop Dogg

Written by JayBird         See post for comments
Dec 10
'07
Snoop Dogg’s Father Hood

1fdaekl.jpg

I have a bizarre love/hate relationship with Snoop Dogg. Since I was thirteen, I’ve had random frightening nightmares with him in it. Once he was shooting rubber bullets at me off Sepulveda Boulevard in Los Angeles. Another time he was following me through this weird maze of rope bridges in the jungle. In the most recent one, he was dancing naked around a funeral pyre with these bizarre sticks in his hair. For whatever reason, Snoop is clearly deeply entrenched in my subconscious. And that scares the crap out of me. He’s been tried for murder a couple of times, rape once, and more drug and weapons charges than you can shake a stick at. Yet he’s also a family man who does a lot of volunteer work in his community, founded and coaches a youth football league, and sponsors their annual Super Bowl, called the Snooper Bowl. And just coming up with such a great name as Snooper Bowl makes me like him so much that I can pretty much overlook all the other stuff. Which doesn’t speak highly of me, I know.

I am opposed to reality television in all forms, and have only watched the tiny bit I have for work. Yes dear readers, I subject myself to that unmitigated crap solely for your benefit. That’s a lotta love right there. But I have to say, I’m really excited for Snoop’s new reality show on E! “Snoop Dogg’s Father Hood.” Apparently we will see Snoop in his natural habitat, see what kind of a dad he is, and get to watch part of the Snooper Bowl.

Us: E! is touting your family as including your “surprisingly unaffected” children. Are you worried that they’ll become divas with all the cameras around?
SD: Well, they might, but I just feel like they’re kids. [Viewers] get a chance to see kids who have a celebrity as a father just dealing with life and them becoming celebrities as well, because that’s what the camera brings. Now they have cameras in front of them, so I’m pretty sure their lifestyles will change, but for the most part my sons are not affected. My daughter really loves me in front of the camera.

Us: You coach your youngest son’s football team and have developed a related charity, right?
SD: We won our Super Bowl game last Sunday! I got 32 kids on my team – the Pomona Steelers - and the Snoop Youth Football League has 2,500 kids, 2,000 football players and 500 cheerleaders.

Us: In the show’s second episode, David Beckham helps teach you and your boys the “other football.”
SD: Yeah! He’s gonna show the fellas how to expand and do something outside the box. We’re so used to American sports - baseball, basketball, football - I wanted my kids to see something other than that: Futbol!

Us: With so many other celebrity families on reality shows, how do “The Doggs” fit in?
SD: This ain’t the Huxtables! We’re a black family with money, but we don’t do it like that.

Us: What do you think viewers will enjoy most?
SD: The camaraderie between me, my kids and my wife. It ain’t made up. A lot of times you can see these TV shows and you can just see the fakeness.

[From Us Weekly]

I think the fakeness is one of the 88 reasons I generally can’t watch reality TV. Plus I really like a traditional sitcom with a laugh track. That way I can be told when to think something’s funny. I don’t want to tax my brain too hard. Snoop really does come across as a family man. It’s interesting to see how much people change in ten years time. I really doubt anyone thought he’d be a devoted father of three the first time they heard “Gin & Juice.” Which, interestingly enough, I can rap all the words to. You know you just started respecting me more. Maybe someday Snoop will ask me to be a guest star. And I can tell him to get the hell out of my subconscious. Or dance naked around a fire, whatever.

eieke.jpg

Posted in Snoop Dogg

Written by JayBird         See post for comments
Nov 5
'07
Amy Winehouse freaked out Snoop Dogg… & that’s saying something

wenn1645413.jpg

Few things in life piss me off more than really bad Italian food. And apparently that’s the one thing Amy Winehouse and I have in common… well that and unnecessarily big hair. Before her disastrous performance at the MTV Europe Awards last week, Snoop Dogg, the show’s host, decided to pay a visit to Amy. Snoop is nothing if not polite that way. When he got there, he witnessed a scene so bizarre that it freaked even him out – and you know Snoop has seen some crazy shiznit in his day. Amy was throwing spaghetti bolognese all over the walls of her dressing room, cutting up the rug, and hurling whatever she could get her hands on. Which leaves me to wonder: diva, or drugs? Or a diva on drugs?

Amy Winehouse went on the warpath before the MTV Europe Music Awards in Munich last week and caused thousands of pounds’ worth of damage to her dressing room. The Camden caner was armed and dangerous - with a plate of spaghetti bolognese that she picked up and threw over the walls. Angry Amy lobbed anything she could get her hands on - fruit, tables and chairs. And then she turned on the rug in her dressing room at the Olympiahalle, and cut it to shreds.

Legendary party king Snoop Dogg, who had dropped in to visit the beehive-haired diva before the show, was shell-shocked at the carnage. A member of his entourage told me: “An hour and a half before the show, Snoop said he wanted to see Amy. When we got there, she was in a right state. Everyone, including her management, just stood there as she lobbed spaghetti up the walls. It went on for about five minutes - with her kicking the walls and throwing whatever she could get her hands on - even the tables and the chairs. Then she started cutting up the rug. Snoop was just standing there open-mouthed. He was pretty freaked out by it and didn’t want to hang out with her after that.”

[From the Mirror]

When you’re too crazy for Snoop Dogg, you’re too crazy to live. I had a lot of evidence prior to this that Amy Winehouse was likely going to end up dead by the end of the year. I mean she’s got to be the most self-destructive celebrity of the last twenty years, and often makes Britney Spears look like a kitten. Britney has yet to go running through the streets in bloody ballet shoes with cuts on her face… that I know of. Even after overdosing and walking out of rehab, Amy is still having drug dealers bring packages to the windows of her apartment – with paparazzi around. All those things made me worry for her. But Snoop Dogg thinking you’re crazy messed up? Thinking you’re so mental he doesn’t even want to hang out with you and snort a little blow? That’s practically like a psychiatrist saying you’re as good as dead.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Wino accepting her award at the MTV Europe Awards on November 1st. Header is Snoop Dogg hosting the event. Images thanks to WENN.

wenn1645368.jpg

Posted in Amy Winehouse, Crazy, Drugs, Snoop Dogg

Written by JayBird         See post for comments
Oct 27
'07
Snoop Dogg won’t be honored by San Francisco

top-cwp-0013291.jpg

San Francisco is a quirky city. It’s liberal, it’s fun, it’s weird, and it works. But Mayor Gavin Newsom sometimes seems like he’s a little off his rocker. He’s really forward thinking, which is great. He’s done a lot for gay rights, and participates in the gay pride parade every year. Wikipedia notes, “He caused a major uproar in 2004 when he issued a directive to the city-county clerk to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. Newsom claimed the California Constitution’s equal protection clause as his authority to do so, and decided to perform the marriages after attending President Bush’s State of the Union address.” But sometimes he does less-than-intelligent things too. Like cheating on his uber-hot wife, CNN legal correspondent Kimberly Guilfoyle with his deputy chief of staff’s wife. Or “accidentally” proclaiming February 23, 2007 Colt Studio Day, in honor of the 40th anniversary of the gay pornography studio. As a result of that little mishap, the local officials had to impose much stricter rules regarding proclamations in an attempt to reign in Newsom. You can see how honoring gay porn could be bad politically.

For some reason that’s beyond me, Newsom decided it would be appropriate to honor Snoop Dogg and give him an award at the Exotic Erotic Ball. Apparently he’s been stopped… just in the nick of time.

The mayor of San Francisco has changed his mind about honoring rapper Snoop Dogg, after local officials imposed tighter rules regarding proclamations.

Snoop Dogg — real name Calvin Broadus — was due to be presented with a proclamation by a representative from Mayor Gavin Newsom’s Office of Criminal Justice during the rapper’s performance at the Exotic Erotic Ball on Friday.

But the honor was withdrawn on Wednesday after new legislation was brought in to prevent a repeat of a previous incident, in which Mayor Newsom accidentally proclaimed February 23 Colt Studio Day, celebrating the 40th anniversary of a local gay pornography studio.

The Colt Studio announcement caused outrage in the local community earlier this year, and the local authorities hope to avoid further criticism for honoring a celebrity known for his advocacy of marijuana and allegiance with the Los Angeles gang the Crips.

But Howard Mauskopf, producer of the Exotic Erotic Ball, is not happy with the retraction.

He tells AllHipHop.com, “All we can really do is roll our eyes. What you have here is a Mayor who I think means to do the right thing, but ended up getting fried in the national press.

“Instead of him standing up for the community, he kowtowed to the Bill O’Reilly’s of the world and instituted a stricter policy. So when it reached a final decision for this proclamation to be reviewed by this new committee, they felt it was too commercial because of the Ball’s sexual nature and Snoop’s past.”

Outspoken talkshow host O’Reilly has previously called for a boycott of rap music because of the presence of allegedly misogynistic lyrics.

[From the San Francisco Gate]

I’m still left pretty unclear about exactly what Snoop’s done that they felt needed honoring. Congrats, you haven’t been accused of murder this year? I think when you get to the point that you’re randomly honoring Snoop Dogg, your political career isn’t heading in the direction you hoped for.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Snoop at the 2007 VH1 Hip Hop Honors on October 4th. Images thanks to PR Photos.

bottom-agm-0070061.jpg

Posted in Awards, Gavin Newsom, Politics, Snoop Dogg

Written by JayBird         See post for comments
Oct 12
'07
Snoop Dogg will rake leaves for his community service

top-cwp-001329.jpg

Well it’s not quite as undignified as Naomi Campbell having to work with the department of sanitation, but Snoop will be doing some community service too – and his will also involve a little toilet time. Snoop will be raking leaves, cleaning toilets, and picking up litter around Orange County parks for 20 days. Who knew the penalty for felonies was so light these days? And doesn’t Snoop have a wee bit of a prior record?

“Snoop Dogg will spend his 160 hours of community service cleaning up an Orange County park, after pleading guilty last month to a felony weapons charge. Snoop’s chores will include ‘raking leaves, washing cars, cleaning toilets (and) picking up litter,’ according to The Orange County Register. The name of the park was not released, in an attempt to keep fans at bay. It is also unclear when he will begin. Andre Manssourian, a deputy district attorney in Orange County, said he expects Snoop will do a fine job. ‘My understanding is that he chose this [work],’ he said. ‘I look forward to his hours of community service [to] help maintain Orange County and keep it beautiful.’

“Snoop’s attorney, Donald Etra, says his client wants to pay his debt and get on with things. ‘He will do whatever it takes,’ Etra said. ‘He will be making the park a better place for Orange County.’ Etra added that Snoop (real name: Calvin Broadus) does not see the work as menial. ‘Snoop has never pretended to be other than a man of the people,’ he said. The 35-year-old rap star was arrested in September 2006 while trying to board a plane with a 20-inch collapsible baton in a computer bag. Last month he pleaded guilty to felony possession of a deadly weapon.”

[From People]

I wonder if they went a little lighter on him because the deadly weapon wasn’t the scariest of deadly weapons. Although to be fair I’m pretty sure that’s my classification and not a legal standard. Snoop is just a bundle of contradictions. He does all these scary things and has been charged with murder and assorted high-level crimes and crazy drug use in the past, and yet he also has a great charity to get kids involved with sports instead of gangs, and annually hosts the “Snooperbowl” football game for kids. And just the name Snooperbowl makes me have a fondness for Snoop Dogg that I can’t explain.

Snoop’s lawyer makes it sound like he’s pretty down-to-earth about his community service. It’s hard to know if that’s true – a good lawyer can certainly make it sound that way – but it also doesn’t sound like he’ll be pulling a Michelle Rodriguez and bitching about every second he has to do something for someone else, either. Now that he’s the ripe old age of 36 (as of October 20th) maybe he’ll be ready to settle down, carry a few less concealed weapons, and get back to making music.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Snoop at the 2007 VH1 Hip Hop Honors on October 4th. Images thanks to PR Photos.

bottom-agm-007006.jpg

Posted in Legal Troubles, Snoop Dogg

Written by JayBird         See post for comments
Aug 17
'07
Jay-Z has crazy money

csh-023864.jpg

If you’re anything like me, you were probably sitting around, looking at your wall, and thinking, “Mirror mirror on the wall, who’s the richest rap mogul of them all?” If your mirror said Jay-Z, you should give it some Windex. Jay-Z was just named the richest rapper by Forbes.com. I thought they were supposed to spend their time talking about financial markets, stocks, and making people panic over real estate. But it seems that lately, Forbes is spending the majority of their time coming out with “The richest…” lists. Last week they had “The richest bald man” and “The richest one legged farmer.” Okay not really, but I would read Forbes a lot more if they did. Okay not really.

“Jay-Z wins all around, says Forbes.com. He’s got Beyonce on his arm _ and more millions than 50 Cent and Diddy. The rap icon, aka Shawn Carter, is No. 1 on the site’s list of “Hip-Hop Cash Kings,” based solely on 2006 income. He banked an estimated $34 million, Forbes.com said Thursday.

“Jay-Z, president and CEO of Def Jam Recordings, released his 11th studio album, ‘Kingdom Come,’ which sold around 2 million copies. Jay-Z, 37, is also part owner of the New Jersey Nets and has endorsement deals with Budweiser, Hewlett-Packard and General Motors.”

[From Forbes.com]

It might be good to be Jay-Z – yeah you have a lot of money, and Beyonce at your beck and call singing that “Cater 2U” song (blech) – but you’d also have to deal with that crazy mother of hers, Tina Knowles. You know, that lady that’s always trying to drape people in the fur of live puppies? Well her clothing line is one of the few out there that still uses fur, and to me it’s all the same thing. Who else makes a lot of money and doesn’t come wit the bizarre mother?

“Curtis ‘50 Cent’ Jackson ranks second with an estimated $32 million. The 31-year-old rapper-businessman oversees his G-Unit record label, clothing line, ring tones and other enterprises, and has sold more than 11 million albums. His latest record, ‘Curtis,’ is due out Sept. 11.

“Diddy (real name: Sean Combs) placed third with an estimated $28 million. A fashion plate, he has a clothing line, Sean John, and heads Bad Boy Worldwide Entertainment and its record label. Diddy, 37, is also host of MTV’s ‘Making the Band’ series.

“Rounding out the top five are Timbaland ($21 million) and Dr. Dre ($20 million). They’re followed by Eminem ($18 million); Snoop Dogg, Kanye West, Pharrell Williams and Scott Storch (all $17 million); Ludacris and T.I. (both $16 million); Outkast and Lil Jon (both $14 million); Ice Cube ($13 million); Jermaine Dupri and Swizz Beatz (both $12 million); Chamillionaire and The Game (both $11 million); and Young Joc ($10 million).”

[From Forbes.com]

You could be at the bottom of that group and still be doing pretty well for yourself. I have no idea who Swizz Beatz (sounds like the name of a cheap watch) or any of the guys after him are, but I’m pretty sure I could learn to love them, given the chance.

Picture note by JayBird: Here’s Jay-Z and Beyonce at the Black and White Ball. Header image of Jay-Z at Giant Magazine’s celebration of Rihanna’s new album on June 3rd. Images thanks to PR Photos.

cwp-000226.jpg

Posted in 50 Cent, Beyonce, Dr. Dre, Eminem, Jay-Z, Kanye West, Ludacris, Money, Outkast, P. Diddy, Pharrell Williams, Scott Storch, Snoop Dogg, Timbaland, Tina Knowles

Written by JayBird         See post for comments
Jul 16
'07
New reality show will highlight the contradiction that is Snoop Dogg

csh-018509.jpg
Snoop Dogg will soon have his own reality show on E! Entertainment Television. Somehow, that makes sense. Apparently Snoop will be shown trying to balance all the complexities that exist in his life. You know, the smoking too much herb, playing too much X Box, and carrying too many guns. The show, described as “’hilarious and heartwarming,’” will debut later this year.

Snoop Dogg is, without a doubt, one of the most charismatic and intriguing personalities in pop culture today,’” said Ted Harbert, president and CEO of Comcast Entertainment Group, the parent company of E! Networks.

“’While he has captured a legion of fans as the king of hip-hop, what makes Snoop most interesting is the side of him that people have never seen. The juggling act that Snoop faces day-in, day-out between career and family is certain to resonate with our viewers.’”

[From E! News]

Snoop is a complex figure. He participates in a lot of community programs and charity work, yet he also has had numerous serious legal troubles that somehow never seem to hurt his career. He was a member of the Crips gang and was charged with the 1993 murder of rival gang member Philip Woldermariam. Snoop was later acquitted. He and his crew were charged in a civil rape case in 2006. A makeup artist for the Jimmy Kimmel show claimed that she was drugged and raped by Snoop and four others. Snoop countersued her for extortion, and both cases were dropped. More recently, Snoop and his posse were arrested at Heathrow airport in London for “violent disorder and affray.” They then vandalized several buildings, injuring police officers. Snoop was later banned from the UK for the foreseeable future. There’s a lot more… too much to write. For a journey through Snoop’s legal troubles, go to Wikipedia. Snoop has also done a lot more good than many celebrities. He founded the Snoop Youth Football league after seeing how hard it was for inner-city families to afford all the costs associated with youth football leagues. Every year they hold the Snooperbowl. Man that’s cute.

I’m really upset to say that I will absolutely be watching this. And I refuse to watch any reality television, but for the first time in my life, I cannot resist it. It will be interesting to see how the show highlights the good that Snoop does, and the fact that he’s a devoted husband and father, in contrast to his gangsta image and legal troubles.

Pictures from PRPhotos.
csh-018521.jpg

Posted in Reality Shows, Snoop Dogg

Written by JayBird         See post for comments
Apr 13
'06
Mariah Carey premieres “Say Something” on TRL - with video


Mariah Carey appeared on MTV’s Total Request Live yesterday to premiere her new video with Snoop Dogg and Pharrell, “Say Something.” It’s not that catchy of a song, and the background track is too repetitive. The video jumps around to different luxurious scenes in Paris and in high end shops, and although it’s interesting it’s not fabulous.

Here is Mariah at Total Request Live and outside the MTV studios yesterday. Sure she looks good now that she’s lost weight, but why does she continue to dress like she’s 14?

Pictures [via]

Here’s the video for “Say Something”

Posted in Mariah Carey, Music, Snoop Dogg, Video

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Mar 24
'06
Mariah Carey: Snoop is a bigger diva than me


Now we know the reason why only Pharrell came to Paris to film his part in the Say Something video - Snoop would have been too expensive:

MARIAH CAREY insists rapper SNOOP DOGG is such a diva she decided it would be best he filmed his contribution to her forthcoming music video in Los Angeles, rather than fly his entourage to Paris, France. Carey and PHARRELL WILLIAMS shot the majority of the promo for SAY SOMETHIN’ in the French capital last week… while Snoop filmed his section in LA on Sunday. Carey tells MTV, “If you guys think I’m a diva and I have requirements, Snoop is the next level. He’s the hip-hop king. “

Mariah goes on to emphasize how over-the-top Snoop’s requirements are, without getting into specifics. Maybe he just didn’t feel like flying to Europe to work and decided it would be easier if the work came to him.

Mariah may be taking advantage of her 20 pound weight loss to become a spokesperson for a fashion house. She is said to have been noticed by Louis Vuitton higher-ups while filming “Say Something” in their Paris store. Her rep said that “she is in talks” with “quite a few fashion labels.” [via]

Mariah, no matter what you say Snoop cannot out-diva you.

Here are pictures of the two filming “Say Something” in LA. [via]

Three more including Carey in a bikini among the LV suitcases after the jump.


(Read more…)

Posted in Mariah Carey, Music, Photos, Snoop Dogg

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Recent Comments:
  • begin: hehe :D
  • Teri: All those years I felt I was swimming upstream against the tide, those years she was zealously putting smut on...
  • Teri: She never learned to garner the good will of people like Tina Turner learned to do in the end. That is why Tina...
  • Ashley: I’m glad that Matt and Camilla shared a bit of their birthing expierience. It sounds like Matthew was...
  • scorn: I smell Madonna’s spin mysters out in force so let’s all start feeling SORRY for Madonna. And...
  • Ashley: I think it’s mean that people call her ugly. She’s got a great body and pretty eyes. I would...
  • Aspen: Will her book talk about how to wreck a marriage and ruin the lives of 3 kids so that you can steal and then...
  • Aspen: My understanding is that in the UK, verbal assault, when it fits certain criteria, can be punished as a crime....