Hilary Swank is still floundering in the midst of the international scandal that resulted when, back in October, she received $1.5 million to attend the birthday party of Chechen dictator Ramzan Kadryov, which included her warm wishes towards “Mr. President” and for which she later expressed deep regrets. In the aftermath, Swank allegedly reacted by firing her manager and many of her agents, and then she was summarily dropped by her PR firm. Yes, Swank has expressed her regrets, but after such an incredible mess, sometimes the best thing for one to do is just drop the matter and hope that people eventually forget that it ever happened.

Part of me wonders why Swank just won’t stop discussing this scandal, but she’s now promoting New Year’s Eve, which arrives in theaters on December 9 and I guess is as good a reason as any for her to continue discussing the faux pas heard around the world. I’ve come to this grand conclusion merely because Hilary apparently doesn’t have much else to discuss during her late-night talk show interview with Jay Leno, as evidenced her great enthusiasm upon discussing her parrot and the eggs that she ordered through the mail. You see, one of these eggs hatched into a chick, which turned into a rooster. Such riveting material, right? After she discusses the Chechen debacle at length, Swank actually imitates the rooster learning to crow, but here’s what she said about the relevant topic:

“I was invited by a Turkish real estate company to go and be a proponent of peace; help celebrate the rebuilding of a war-torn city. It was Grozny city, which is in Chechnya . . . I get offered appearances all the time . . . These people were trying to rebuild their lives too. Just seven years ago it was very war-torn and very dangerous. And I thought, ‘Absolutely, yes. That’s an incredible thing; I love to travel, I love to meet people. This is an exciting opportunity.’

“And then, once there, on the side of the stage, someone said, ‘It’s the president’s birthday; can you wish him a happy birthday?’ . . . I had never heard of him before. In fact, when they said his name, I couldn’t even say it. So I said, ‘I’ll just say Mr. President,’ is what I’m thinking in my head. So, I went out and said, ‘Happy birthday, Mr. President,’ after I said my whole speech about it’s great to be a proponent of peace and you guys are doing incredible things rebuilding this city. And then when I got back, only then was I made aware of who he was . . . Kadryov. Now I can say his name because of I’ve done my research. He’s a bad, bad guy . . . Human rights organizations had reached out to warn me before I went but I did not get those warnings, they weren’t shared with me, and so that went out into the press too, and I had never known, and I thank the Human rights organizations for trying to reach out, and for reaching out, even though I didn’t get it. And the silver lining is that I’m actually working with the Human Rights Watch now.

“[On a question about the backlash] It was all over the world, and shame on me. The bottom line is that I should know where I’m going and I should do better research, and I can definitely guarantee that I won’t go anywhere ever again without doing full research. I donated all the money, and like I said, there’s always a silver lining to things. I’ve learned a lot about the incredible things people are now doing . . . Again, I should know where I’m going . . . I actually didn’t know Chechnya was separate from Russia. Now I know all of that, but I had no idea.”

Oddly enough, Swank still appears to be slightly cloudy on the details, for Chechnya is its own republic even though it technically remains part of the Russian Federation. In addition, it’s interesting that Swank frames her rationale for attending on loving to travel and meet people for a good cause instead of the cool $1.5 million, but at least Swank has now articulated that she’s donated the money to a mysterious cause. Ideally, that cause would be the Human Rights Watch, but she probably would’ve mentioned it if that was the case. Swank still obviously places some blame upon her former manager, but she’s also grovelled quite well by accepting that she should’ve done her research. Mostly, it sounds like she learned her lesson here, and hopefully, that’ll be the end of the discussion. That is, until she decides to imitate a rooster again.

Photos courtesy of Fame and WENN

Ryan Reynolds was on The Tonight Show last night promoting The Change Up, which is one of those body switching movies about a single guy (Reynolds) changing places with a married guy (Jason Bateman). It looks dumb and predictable, and it’s written by the guys who brought us the Hangover movies. The director, David Dobkin, did Wedding Crashers and Fred Claus so it’s not like this is going to be groundbreaking or particularly funny, but I could be wrong.

During his interview Ryan told so many funny self deprecating stories. (You can watch it on NBC.com if you’re in the US.) It’s been a while since I’ve seen an interview with him, and he was just so entertaining. First he talked about how he had some trials and tribulations while filming The Change Up in Atlanta. His first trailer caught fire, his second trailer flooded, his hotel room flooded, then he very quickly glossed over the detail that he split up with then-wife Scarlet Johansson at the time. It was clever the way he rattled it off. “It snowballed. My hotel room flooded, my dog got sick, came down with a slight case of divorce and I broke my pinky finger.” He said it like that very quickly as if it were his dog that got divorced and not him.

He told another story about how he got hit by a drunk driver and sent to the hospital with broken bones when he was 19 – after he had decided to walk home from the bar instead of driving. (He was in Canada at the time, where the “drinking age is six,” he explained.) Then we heard about how he jumped off a bridge in Zurich and broke a vertebrae in his back. His friend jumped, but “I dove, because I’m clinically dumb.”

The best anecdote from Ryan was about how Olivia Wilde’s pasties came off during a sex scene he was filming with her.
“In the scene I take her top off… She has these pasties, but she’s drawn these adorable little smiley faces on them. And I forget every line in the scene… I’m nervous… At some point at the end of the scene she takes my hands and puts them on her breasts. So they’re there, palms are a little sweaty. At the end of the scene I take them off. I’m trying not to look at her like a 14 year-old boy who just won the lady lottery.

“I take my hands away and I look down at my hands and there’s two frickin’ smiley faces. I have no idea what to do, so the scene is over now. I reflexively like an idiot just put my hands back on her breasts. I think I’m doing it like to cover them up, but I’m realizing right now it’s a very fine line between chivalry and workplace sexual assault. Thank God someone comes in with a towel.”

The dude is a natural entertainer that’s for sure. He surely practiced all those stories but he came prepared and his delivery was excellent.

At the premiere for the movie last night, Ryan’s maybe ex-hookup and good friend Sandra Bullock came to support him. (She also could have been there for a producer named Jonathon Komack Martin, who works on The George Lopez show, which she also producers.) The two looked very comfortable together and happy to see each other. Bullock wore a black jumpsuit. I’m not a fan of that look for her, particularly the boob ruffle, but at least the pants aren’t baggy as we’ve seen with so many other jumpsuits lately. The shoes are gorgeous and understated too. Her hair and makeup were so pretty.

Olivia Wilde wore this red Antonio Berardi dress with pointy shoulder pads. The dress itself is bizarre but not that bad. The bright red shoes have got to go. This isn’t a wedding or a prom, you don’t need to match your shoes to your dress! Plus the color is off. She’s cute though. Kaiser wants me to mention the bangs trauma. I’m not a bangs fan either but it’s a decent look for her.

And Leslie Mann wore this gladiator-style white dress with a matching braided belt. Why are sparkly shoulders so popular? At least this isn’t as bad as the dress Anna Paquin wore to the 2010 Emmys. I’m always reminded of that dress when I see this style.

Oh and I can’t forget Jason Bateman!

Photo credit: WENN and Fame

A very pregnant Jessica Alba was a guest on The Tonight Show last night. She was promoting Spy Kids 4D, which has this “extra dimension” in that there are scratch and sniff cards for viewers to experience certain smells shown on screen. Joel McHale is in this mess too, which is out August 19. I watched Alba’s interview and she didn’t say much that was interesting. She did reveal that she’s a somewhat strict mom, which we’ve heard from her before.

On Honor’s style
She loves to wear dress up. I had to explain to her that only certain types of girls are allowed to wear plastic heels outdoors, so she’s allowed to only wear her plastic princess heels indoors. I can’t really tell her why yet.

On giving time outs with the lights off
I’m definitely the disciplinarian. We don’t believe in like spankings [or]… hot sauce. My daughter, we give her time outs whenever she’s naughty… Just time out in the bathroom isn’t bad enough. Even though she’s in a lit bathroom that has big windows and it’s a big bathroom it makes it seem that much worse… with the lights off. She freaks out… We have a nice little chair that’s her size. [for Time outs]

[From The Tonight Show, video above]

Alba’s segment was right before registered nurse and sex expert Sue Johanson came on. Johanson had been on for a few minutes and had very frankly answered a bunch of questions about sex when Leno asked Alba if she had any questions for her. Alba wanted to know if there was any way to harm the baby during sex. Johanson basically said “no” and that the uterus was pretty solid. She explained “that baby is in there, and that baby ain’t going nowhere.”

“As someone who’s in the later stage of pregnancy, is there any way to harm the baby during intercourse?” Alba asked.

“That baby is in there and that baby ain’t going nowhere until it’s ready,” Johanson assured her. “That uterus wall is just like that,” she said knocking the arm of her chair. She then painted a picture of the cervix smiling from intercourse and things got a little weird.

[From AOLTV]

Alba’s question may sound crass to some, but it was nothing compared to what Johanson was saying. She had been talking about penises, orgasms and masturbation for a while and she went on about it. I’m not familiar with Johanson and she was cracking me the hell up. There’s just something so funny about an older lady talking about sex. She answered a question about whether men can fake orgasms. “Yes, but they can’t fake ejaculation. It has a very, shall we say distinctive odor.” A 68 year-old widower wrote in to ask if he’d ever have sex again and she said “Boy I hope so, here I am honey.” Johanson is 80!

When I was that far along pregnant I wasn’t interested in sex. I could barely get comfortable in bed and had to use one of those full body pillows to sleep with. Jessica looks big and she said the baby was due “soon,” but didn’t give a time frame. She wouldn’t say whether she was having a boy or a girl, which she seemed to know but not be willing to reveal publicly. (Hollybaby is reporting that she confirmed it’s a girl, but if you watch the clip that’s not the case at all.) I’m not going to fault her for asking about pregnant sex. Given the context it seemed like a totally legitimate question. I will say that my opinion of her wasn’t changed much after seeing this interview. Pregnant or not she’s not the most likable person.

Alba is shown on 7/10, 7/8 and 7/6/11. Credit: Fame

Lindsay Lohan’s appearance on the Tonight Show aired last night. (You can watch it online on NBC.com if you’re in the US.) She came across well, for her, in that she said the right things. She was fidgeting and looked like she hadn’t slept in days, but she was dressed appropriately in a silk black jumpsuit that was somewhat fug but not the worst thing she’s worn.

You could tell that she’d rehearsed ahead of time and that she was coached on what to say. It was all about how she’s learned from her mistakes and is ready to move on. As I mentioned yesterday, she’s putting the cart way ahead of the horse and acting like this whole thing is behind her, but she still has significant jail time looming for her probation violation and faces a separate charge on grand theft charges. Plus she’s been sentenced to three months of full time community service. Given her history of failing to meet even the most basic court requirements, you know she’s not going to be able to complete it.

Lindsay talks a good game, though, and if we weren’t aware of her history she might look like an average burnt out starlet and not like a delusional addict trying to save the last scraps of her career.

Here are some of the things she said, and at times she smirked like she was the only one aware that she was pulling on over on the audience. She kept looking to the audience for validation, as if she was constantly trying to gauge if they were buying her act. They did cheer and gave her a standing ovation, but as someone mentioned in the comments there are flashing signs telling them how to react so it’s not like it was spontaneous.

Sort-of owning up to her mistakes, but thinks it’s time to move on
I made a lot of poor decisions in the past, and I’m dealing with the consequences of those decisions…

I’m a fighter and I know that I have to work to gain the respect back. I’m willing to do the work that I have to do to follow through with being an actress.

Being young and being in the position I was in, you don’t really take the time to appreciate what you have. It all is kind of a whirlwind and people make decisions for you, but I’m not a kid anymore, I’m 24.

Claims to be “in the clear now”
I’ve made a lot of mistakes, and I recognize that, but I’m in the clear now and I feel like as long as I stay focused then I will be able to achieve what I want to achieve.

That’s the thing, Lindsay isn’t in the clear at all. This is how she got in this mess in the first place, by thinking she was above it all and that it was all behind her while she was in the thick of it, snorting and smoking and stealing.

Then Leno asked Lindsay what she wanted to change about herself. This was a chance for her to own up to her mistakes, to say she wanted to turn over a new leaf even if she was just blowing smoke up our asses as she’d done the whole time. Lindsay didn’t talk much about what she personally needed to change, it was all about how other people needed to change and focus on her non-existent career. We’ve heard this from her so many times before. In fact she said basically the same thing on Ellen – two years ago.

On what she wanted to change about herself
The public perception. I want it to be about my work, not about things that I didn’t get into this business for, that I put myself in positions where that was the bigger story.

On her jail sentence
I was kind of shocked we didn’t expect the outcome to be what it was, but I’m a big girl, and I’m going to do what I’m told to do. That’s what I need to do to continue on with working in my life and I’m taking responsibility.

On if she was treated fairly in court
I think that I was treated the way I should be treated.

On her jail experience
It was an interesting experience and it was definitely a wakeup call. Everything happens for a reason.

On learning of her sentence
It was shocking. I was a bit numb.

On her childhood
My mom’s amazing, she’s really strong. I’ve watched her keep her strength throughout her life. I have good people in my life.

On the situation with her dad
I plead the fifth on that.

On her fans – what fans?
I feel like I’ve let my fans down by putting myself in situations when I was younger and wasn’t thinking clearly. I want to be the person that I aspire to be. And be the actress, and be in this industry, and make movies.

On where she sees herself in 6 years at 30
Hopefully sitting here after I’ve won an Oscar

So is it time for Lindsay to have a comeback? Will she be able to even complete her community service requirements? Judging by her past behavior, the answer is clear. She thinks this is all behind her and she’s going to move on to a great career and an Oscar, but all she’s got on the horizon is a role that she almost lost that her dad scored for her from his prison mob connections. She’s living in her “I’m a celebrity” bubble and it’s filled with crack smoke, piles of dirty designer clothes, and memories of her Disney past.

There’s a lot of talk about how Lady Gaga is so blatantly copying Madonna’s moves and music but decided to compliment Whitney Houston when she exhibited some false modesty during her Grammy acceptance speech. During an appearance on the Tonight Show last night, Gaga said that Madonna’s people sent their support for her new song, the one that sounds just like “Express Yourself,” and that everything is good.

There is really no one that is a more adoring and loving Madonna fan than me. I am the hugest fan, personally and professionally. And… Well, the good news is, I got an e-mail from her people and her sending me their love and complete support on behalf of the single. And if the queen says it shall be, then it shall be. And I think it’s so important as well, I think today in music there’s the freedom in the song, the sort of R&B early 90s vibe that it has. It’s so full of love and spirit. I think it’s the spirit that people are reacting to the most. I just want everyone to rejoice and celebrate and be unafraid to be happy with music. It doesn’t always have to be so dark. It doesn’t always have to be so sexy. Sometimes it’s just wonderful to celebrate life and kind of go to church with it.

[via DListed]

I watched most of Gaga’s interview and she’s so full of sh*t that it really annoys me. She name drops designers constantly and talks as if she’s here to enlighten the masses about the meaning of life through music and performance art. On the meaning of “Born This Way,” she said “It’s about being able to know that when you were born, you weren’t just born in that moment. You have your entire life to realize the person that you’re potentially going to become, and whoever you chose to be was part of your destiny. So I’m encouraging people to know that if in this moment you don’t feel entirely happy with who you are, you feel bullied or disenfranchised, it’s never too late to harness your confidence and your inner superstar.” See – she’s like a one-woman cult with her “little monsters” and her pep talks. All you have to do is listen to her derivative music and watch her copycat moves and you too will be saved.

I used to like Lady Gaga, but at some point her hype stopped being humorous and she started to take herself seriously.

Chelsea Handler was a guest on The Tonight Show last night. She was promoting her E! show and she made a lot of lame jokes, including some about race, as is typical for her. She brought up the fact that she was dating 50 cent by quipping that she would have brought him with her on vacation, only he can’t swim. Here’s part of what she told Jay, thanks to E! You can watch her interview in two parts on Hulu and a segment is above.

On her vacation with Jennifer Aniston
“She was sweet enough to take me on vacation with her. I was trying not to get photographed next to her in a bathing suit, for obvious reasons,” Chelsea said Tuesday on The Tonight Show. “So I did a lot of stuff on my own.”

Like drink?

“It’s not even cute! I was probably trying to bend over and pick up a margarita,” Chelsea lambasted Jay Leno as he insisted upon cutting to a shot of the funnylady’s bikini-clad butt. “You know how I feel about my margaritas, Jay!”

But because she loves beach vacations, it might be a while before she’s ever caught sipping margaritas with 50 Cent.

She brings up 50 Cent without any prompting from Jay
“I can’t bring 50 Cent with me, ’cause he’s not a strong swimmer,” she joked, adding that her friend has not met her family. Because, as she pointed out again, he’s just her friend.

“It’s Fiddy Cent, isn’t it?” Jay asked.

“I don’t know, I call him Curtis when we’re having sex,” Chelsea deadpanned. “No, but he does have a real name. His name is Curtis. Curtis…I don’t know, I should find out.”

Jay also asked Chelsea about her brief relationship with animal expert Dave Salmoni.

“We just did not have anything else to talk about,” she laughed. “No, he’s a really nice guy…It was a short relationship, you know, in and out.”

[From E! Online]

Was it racist to say that 50 is “not a strong swimmer?” She said it and then looked to the audience for laughs, so I do think she meant it as a joke about his race. Then she made another lame joke after the break that she was “looking over at your band and noticed there are hardly any white guys. They must have heard I was coming. Thank you. Oh there you are, hi whitey!”

This woman is not funny, she’s rude and she makes stupid jokes about race all the time. Somehow she still has an E! talk show though, and she’s friends with Jennifer Aniston. What do they say about the company you keep? I hope Jay had her on due to a last minute cancellation.

Private Practice and Grey’s Anatomy star Kate Walsh wore a dress adorned with sushi and sashimi on The Tonight Show on Friday. Walsh said it was in homage to Lady Gaga, some of whose fans went after her on twitter for making a comment about the meat dress that Gaga wore to the VMAs. On Twitter Walsh wrote “Just saw the meat dress…dunno. Love her, but her argument for wearing it is lame and doesn’t track…” which is an accurate assessment but of course Gaga’s “monsters” went after her. That doesn’t jibe with how she explained the Twitter controversy to Leno, as she made it sound like she just joked that it looked like prosciutto that she could eat with some melon. Walsh says that she also wore the dress to bring awareness to the Oceana organization. Unlike Gaga’s real (but cheap!) meat dress, Walsh’s sushi was all fake, as she later admitted to on Twitter.

‘Private Practice’ star Kate Walsh paid tribute to Lady Gaga’s meat dress with an alternative for seafood lovers everywhere. “It’s a sushi and sashimi dress,” the “Private Practice” star told host Jay Leno on Thursday.

Walsh’s dress included a lobster-tail shoulder piece and was packed to the gills with maki rolls, bits of yellowtail, tuna, salmon, and edamame, and was accessorized with a maki-roll ring and sunglasses, and peep-toe Louis Vuitton heels with a prawn across the toes.

“It’s an homage, if you will, to Lady Gaga,” Walsh explained of her outfit. “I was inspired by her meat dress.” The actress added, however, that she and the superstar singer recently hit a rough patch.

“I was on a plane during the VMAs and one of my Twitter fans said, ‘What did you think of Lady Gaga’s meat dress?’” said Walsh, who hadn’t yet seen the show since she was in transit.

“They sent me a link, I opened it up, and I was like, ‘Oh!’ The first thought I had was, like, ‘A nice plate of prosciutto with melon,’ thinking that’s kind of witty,” she told Leno. “But oh no, no, no, no! It set off the Little Monsters [Gaga's fans]. It opened up a whole can of whoop-ass.”

The pair have since patched things up, and Walsh decided to pay tribute to the “Alejandro” singer with her ensemble and also raise awareness for her favorite charity, Oceana, which aims to protect our planet and its waters.

“I’m a huge fan of Lady Gaga. Whatever her statement was with her meat dress, I thought, Why not give a shout out to one of my charities,” Walsh explained.

“These are all totally sustainable fish, by the way,” she noted of her dress. “There’s no bluefin on here. You want to stay away from that.”

[From Popeater]

You can watch the full interview on NBC.com and there’s a segment below, thanks to AOL’s popeater. Of course that old perv Leno made some dumb jokes about the sushi and said “this is the first time I thought I [would] really enjoy having some sushi.”

Walsh got flirty and asked “you feel like going fishing?”

“Yeah I don’t mind going fishing. Actually, I like deep sea fishing.”

Walsh said that Amy Brenneman got her into tweeting, and that she resisted at first thinking “No, that might be the end of Western civilization.” She said she’s really into it now and enjoys interacting with her fans. “There’s no other way to kind of do that. [Talk to fans] I love my fans.”

She seems nice enough and the sushi dress was kind of funny. It’s clear she doesn’t take herself seriously, and you have to admire that. She’s not above using the same tactics as Gaga to get some press, but at least she’ll tell you where she got her inspiration and not make up some muddled excuse.

Jay’s comment to Bristol is at about :20 in. This is the second part of her interview

Bristol Palin was a guest on The Tonight Show on Friday. She did a decent job and kind of rolled with it, but I still found her very bland. She’s 19 years old and doesn’t have a lot to say, nor does she seem comfortable with the media. That’s fine and a lot of people are like that, but the vast majority of them don’t pursue fame, either. Bristol told Jay that she learned that she was invited to be on Dancing With The Stars through a text message she received while working at her day job as an office manager at a dermatologists. The way she explained it was simple – she decided to follow up on it and here she is. There was no mention of whether it was hypocritical of her to be on the show when she previously blasted Levi for being “obsessed with the limelight.” The thing that stuck out for me in this interview, and you can read it below and watch above, is Jay’s really stupid inappropriate comment to Bristol about getting pregnant. It was uncalled for and didn’t make sense, as if he was waiting to make a bad pregnancy joke and then tried to shoehorn it in there.

On choosing to do DWTS
Some people are like ‘do you really want to be in the spotlight?’ but I’m having fun with it

On her breakup with Levi
I’m not disappointed, not heartbroken. I tried to make it work for my son. It didn’t work. I realized that we’re not meant to be. I’m just focused on being a good mom.

On how Levi has changed
The guy I fell in love with was a hardworking Alaskan man that didn’t want to wear straight-legged jeans and boots and um be chased by Radar and those kind of people. So, it’s a night and day difference and it’s sad to watch, but oh well.

On Levi’s run for mayor of Wasila
He needs to move to Wasila, to the city limits, and he’s got to get his GED.

On how Dancing with The Stars is hard work
Well, I expected it to be hard work, but I’m so uncoordinated, don’t have any rhythm so we’re starting from scratch.

Leno’s inappropriate comment that followed this statement
I think it was a wise choice to go on the show. I was going to say, that’s also how you get pregnant, but I’m not going to go there. I’m teasing, I’m teasing.

On whether she’s a diva
No. The only thing I’ve asked for is a velcro mic pack so I don’t have to wear it on my belt loop.

What the hell is Jay talking about “that’s also how you get pregnant“? What does that mean in response to a 19 year-old girl saying that she can’t dance? It’s so wildly off the mark that it just goes to show what this old dude is thinking about. The people in the audience groaned loudly at that one, and so they should have. Remember when Letterman made a dumb joke about Bristol getting knocked up at a Yankees game but was accidentally referring to Sarah’s youngest daughter, Willow? Sarah and her husband freaked out about that and said that Letterman was joking about statutory rape. Letterman then apologized and Sarah accepted, and the whole thing was blown out of proportion, in my opinion. Anyway is Palin going to call Leno on this? It was a dumb joke and one that she’ll probably let go. I bet she’s seething over it, though.

Jay’s show is not doing as well as hoped, but he’s still hanging in there for some reason. It’s not because he’s particularly funny or has strong interview skills that’s for sure.

Here’s the first part of Bristol’s interview:

Here are photos of Bristol outside DWTS practice on 9/2, 9/4 and 9/5, with partner Mark Ballas. Credit: WENN.com

Remember the months and months of horrible douchebaggery between Conan O’Brien, Jay Leno and NBC? Recap: when Conan O’Brien took over The Tonight Show, his ratings kind of sucked (they just weren’t as good as Leno’s, back in the day), so NBC jury-rigged a scheme to get Leno back at the Tonight Show, effectively cancelling his horrible 10 p.m. weeknight show (which also sucked in the ratings). Chaos ensued. In the end, Conan went to TBS, Leno went back to Tonight, and Jimmy Fallon is now Leno’s “successor”. Weird.

Anyway, the whole thing started because NBC was terrified of their sucky ratings for both 10 p.m. and 11:30 p.m. Local NBC affiliates were complaining, and something had to be done, for sure. But the solution might have been worse than the problem, because now Leno is tanking… kind of.

NBC might have summer’s most-watched show in “America’s Got Talent,” but the network’s late-night ratings aren’t so sunny. “The Tonight Show With Jay Leno” is pulling a smaller number in the advertiser-coveted adults 18-49 demographic than when Conan O’Brien hosted the show last year.

In fact, this summer is the lowest-rated “Tonight” on record, though such feats have become increasingly common on broadcast across the board.

Since the end of the broadcast season, Leno is averaging 3.8 million viewers and a 1.0 adults 18-49 rating. That’s a 12% improvement in total audience compared with O’Brien, though off 23% in the demo and down in both measurements compared with Leno’s performance two years ago. His percentages greatly improve if comparisons begin a few weeks deeper into the summer so “Tonight” is not facing O’Brien’s opening weeks hosting the show, though O’Brien is tops in the demo either way.

Even with the reduced rating, Leno is back to beating his top rival, CBS’ “Late Show With David Letterman,” by a healthy 22% in both metrics. CBS touts that Letterman’s ratings are at least holding steady compared with last summer, when Letterman hit an all-time low of his own. Other late-night hosts have been showing stability too, with NBC’s “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon,” CBS’ “The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” and ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” maintaining their demo averages, and Fallon and Kimmel even sporting gains in total viewers.

Heading into the fall, NBC’s affiliates say that, if anything, they’re pleased about the schedule in general and late-night in particular. Last year, stations contended with the expected ratings decline of putting Leno at 10 p.m. and the uncertainty of O’Brien hosting “Tonight.”

Station managers are looking forward to having scripted dramas back in late primetime, which in turn should fuel audience momentum into late-night. There’s an expectation that it’s nearly impossible not to have a better story to tell advertisers in the fall, especially with NBC stocking up on dramas like high-concept series “The Event” and shows from top-shelf producers Dick Wolf (“Law & Order: Los Angeles”), Jerry Bruckheimer (“Chase”) and J.J. Abrams (“Undercovers”).

“There’s been a lot of NBC stations that have suffered significant declines in late prime, and that’s not going to happen with this lineup based on the estimates buyers are getting,” said Eric Lassberg, president and GM of NBC affiliate KXAN-TV Austin. “All evidence points to our ratings going up [at 10 p.m.].”

[From The Hollywood Reporter]

So, Leno is back to beating Letterman (sad), but Leno (and NBC) loses in the end because they aren’t picking up any viewers under the age of 50 years old – you know, all of those viewers who might actually want to buy some of stuff being advertised during those all-important commercial breaks. NBC might get bragging rights for beating Letterman, but advertisers are going to be pulling out by the end of the year if Leno doesn’t get a viewership that’s anything less than geriatric.

Basically, Leno still sucks and it’s okay to still hate him.

Oh, and you know what Conan is up to? He just announced the name of his new TBS show – “Conan”.

Leno on August 5, 2010. Credit: WENN.

The choked up part starts when the video has about 1:30 to go
Thanks to the Huffington Post for pointing us to this video of Katherine Heigl getting choked up on The Tonight Show when talking about her brother, who died at the age of 15 in a car accident. Heigl has been doing the press tour for her new film with Ashton Kutcher, Killers. She’s been characteristically outspoken, but not as rude as in the past. Heigl used to regularly badmouth her employers but now she’s just talking some mild smack about her husband and her homelife. Adopting a baby has really softened her.

When I saw Heigl on Letterman last week I was struck by how much of a downer she was. She was focusing on how she and her husband are overly concerned about their 17 month-old daughter Naliegh’s safety. She got all serious talking about it and explained that she was feeling very emotionally vulnerable since she had a child.

Last night on Leno she was laughing on the surface but there was something very sad and serious about her. She admitted that everything had happened so fast in terms of her marriage and adopting and that she had “steamrolled” her husband Josh. Then Leno asked her about how she was feeling emotionally since she became a mother and she really opened up. I believe that she was entirely sincere when she started crying talking about how she now understands the turmoil her mother went through losing her brother. I have to question, though, why she’s talking about it on a national talkshow. Why so serious, Katherine? It’s heartbreaking and I feel for her, but at the same time there’s something so calculated about it. Aren’t celebrities supposed to come up with funny anecdotes to tell on nightly talk shows? This isn’t Oprah.

Here’s part of what she said:

That duty [to keep your child safe] starts to turn into this feeling that’s overpowering and overwhelming and I don’t know how to explain it, it’s so strange… Anytime I see a film or television show that has to deal with anything tragic or difficult between a mother and a child… I feel ‘oh my God’ the crying begins. I try not to cry because Josh makes fun of me…

I said to my mother, and I don’t mean to get maudlin. This is so awful I’m sorry. My brother died over 20 something years ago in a car accident. I was really little and… experienced that peripherally as a sibling… I said to my mother recently ‘I could never understand what you went through… until I held this child in my hands.’

She said almost the exact same thing on Letterman about getting choked up by movies now that she’s a mom. You have to assume that her sharing this personal vulnerability wasn’t some kind of spontaneous admission, and that she planned it out like this. Katherine is trying to show us that she’s human and has feelings now that she’s a mom.

I believe her, and I don’t think she was a horrible person before or anything, but this isn’t winning me over. It’s kind of making me think that she’s not that skilled at working the media. It’s like she’s trying to share a moment of weakness with us, but is looking like she has so little control over that weakness that it overwhelms her. I just don’t think she’s ready to talk about these feelings that she hasn’t even worked through yet. There’s a limit to what the public should be told, and we don’t need to see how much a celebrity is affected by personal tragedy. This is something to tell a magazine when she’s ready, not a live audience looking for laughs. Plus there’s something kind of fake about sharing such personal information on Leno of all places.

I asked Kaiser what she thought about this and she said that Heigl is trying to “work an angle on her new-and-improved image.” I find it suspicious, like we’re supposed to feel sorry for her. She has feelings, sure, but she’s still sharing them inappropriately as usual.

She was styled much better for Leno than she was for Letterman, I have to say.