Melissa Etheridge and her partner, Tammy Lynn Michaels, had an elaborate commitment ceremony that was similar to a typical wedding and reception in 2003. At that time, they were not allowed to legally marry under California law. When gay marriage became legal in California on June 16, 2008, thousands of same sex couples took advantage of the opportunity for equal marriage rights. Etheridge said in early October that she would legally marry Michaels soon, but that they had four children and just needed to find the time. Now that Proposition 8 has passed, which strips same sex couples of the right to marry under California law, the time has run out for Etheridge and Michaels and so many other gay couples in the state.

Etheridge penned an essay for The Daily Beast in which asks why she should have to pay state taxes if the state refuses to recognize her and her partner as full citizens. People Magazine reports this as if she’s outright refusing to pay state taxes, but it sounds more like she’s hypothetically saying she shouldn’t have to pay taxes because she can’t get legally married:

Okay. So Prop 8 passed. Alright, I get it. 51% of you think that I am a second class citizen. Alright then. So my wife, uh I mean, roommate? Girlfriend? Special lady friend? You are gonna have to help me here because I am not sure what to call her now. Anyways, she and I are not allowed the same right under the state constitution as any other citizen. Okay, so I am taking that to mean I do not have to pay my state taxes because I am not a full citizen. I mean that would just be wrong, to make someone pay taxes and not give them the same rights, sounds sort of like that taxation without representation thing from the history books.

Okay, cool I don’t mean to get too personal here but there is a lot I can do with the extra half a million dollars that I will be keeping instead of handing it over to the state of California. Oh, and I am sure Ellen will be a little excited to keep her bazillion bucks that she pays in taxes too. Wow, come to think of it, there are quite a few of us fortunate gay folks that will be having some extra cash this year. What recession? We’re gay! I am sure there will be a little box on the tax forms now single, married, divorced, gay, check here if you are gay, yeah, that’s not so bad. Of course all of the waiters and hairdressers and UPS workers and gym teachers and such, they won’t have to pay their taxes either.

[From The Daily Beast]

Etheridge goes on to say that there is no “us” and “them” and that we’re united as one people and Obama’s future presidency gives her hope that this divisiveness will end. She also says she’ll stay in California and not go to another state or country where same sex marriage is legal, because it’s important that they continue to fight for the basic right to have their union legally recognized

As someone who used to live in Connecticut, I am so proud that my state passed a gay marriage bill. On November 12, it will become the second state to perform same sex marriages after Massachusetts. It’s very disheartening and sad for so many couples in California that they had this right taken away from them after a long and difficult battle. Slowly but surely, gay rights are gaining ground in America and maybe the court challenges to Proposition 8 will be successful. It takes time and there are setbacks, but as we have seen there are also great triumphs.

Melissa Etheridge and Tammy Lynn Michaels are shown at a screening of Sycko on 6/26/07 and at the ASCAP Pop Music Awards on 4/18/07. Credit: WENN

Singer Melissa Etheridge, 47, and her partner, Tammy Lynn Michaels, 33, held a large commitment ceremony attended by 175 guests in September, 2003, but were not permitted to marry legally under California law at that time. Their first ceremony was a traditional wedding complete with a proposal from Melissa, a custom-designed three carat diamond ring for Tammy, and a ceremony and reception on a location overlooking the Pacific. They wore Badgley Mischa outfits, with Tammy in a gown and Melissa in a cream linen and silk pantsuit. The reception tent was decorated with 2,000 candles, periwinkle hydrangeas and lavender roses. Guests include Tom Hanks, Ellen DeGeneres, and Al Gore. They described it as their dream wedding, and it’s clear they put a lot of thought and planning into it to make it an event they’ll always remember.

Now that Melissa and Tammy are able to marry legally under California law, they say they’ll do it when they find time. After watching footage of their wedding, below, you can tell why they’re not in a hurry to make it technically “legal” - they already had a lavish wedding that meant a lot to each of them.

Melissa and Tammy are raising four children together, Bailey, 11, and Beckett, 9, from Melissa’s relationship with Julie Cypher, and boy and girl twins Miller Steven and Johnnie Rose, who turn two in a couple of weeks. They have their hands full.

Singer Melissa Etheridge is ready to wed longtime partner Tammy Lynn Michaels!

“Yes, we have four children and we’re trying to find the right time,” she told Extra.

Etheridge, 47, and Michaels, 33, first exchanged vows in Malibu in 2003.

Now that gay marriage is legalized in California, the couple will make it official.

“We are so grateful for the blessings from our friends and family as we commence our vows, and begin the rest of our lives together,” the pair, who exchanged platinum-and-diamond wedding bands, said in a statement at the time.

[From US Weekly]

Congratulations to Etheridge and Michaels on finally being able to make it official. It’s about time.

Here’s a video that features Etheridge and Michaels’ wedding. They talk about the first time they met, Melissa’s proposal, and their relationship. It’s really touching and you can tell how much they love each other.

Melissa Etheridge and Tammy Lynn Michaels are shown on 4/18/07 at the 24th Annual ASCAP Pop Music Awards. Credit: Juan Rico/Fame Pictures

Melissa Etheridge’s wife, Tammy Lynn Michaels, got annoyed at people commenting on TMZ about her family. She blogged about how she was followed by paparazzi on a day out to the twins’ pediatrician and how it wasn’t fair that people were judging her based on pictures taken against her will.

At first I thought she was pissed that people were criticizing her choice of a stroller for her four and a half month-old twins, a boy and girl. One commentor on TMZ wondered why she didn’t get a Bugaboo (which I find ridiculous because I would never pay that much for a baby stroller, but I’m not rich) but the main criticism was that she was using a stroller that didn’t provide the neck support the baby needed, and indeed you can see the infant slumped down in the umbrella stroller.

The main thing that must have bothered her though were all the homophobic ignorant comments. As a blogger I’ve learned that there are racists, trolls, and pre-teens that are going to flame and talk smack, so I honestly thought at first that she was upset at the stroller comments, because why would that other shit bother her? She’s majorly upset about something though, and it’s probably that.

She blogged that she can’t stand the paparazzi, that people must hate themselves if they criticize her, and that she would create a magazine all about the paparazzi and “turn the tables.” K-Fed said this same shit a few months before his marriage flamed out:

so you take your kid out for their 4 month check up (with two moms that have barely recovered from the flu), and then you realize… you’ve been stalked by a photographer the entire time.

so montana is out. no more shopping on montana. heads up: montana is being staked out like robertson and rodeo and beverly hills. buh-bye montana stores.

all we wanted was some pizza to take home. so while we waited, we grabbed our brand new cheapie stroller out of the back, cuz quite frankly…. the babies are big, and Miller is so heavy that we can’t hold him long without our arms falling off. so as we waited, we stuck him in a stroller where he promptly fell asleep. and the photographer grabbed some of those shots… and now suddenly what was just a marital discussion (”Should we put them in it? It’s too big, but it’s just for a second while our sick and recovering butts wait for food… Okay, maybe, what do you think? Hmmm….” you know- those marital discussions…..). it turns into a snapped image with no explanation; and then the strangers who have time to look online at others’ lives… they leave comments…. or, rather, insults, crowing with smug self-satisfaction and ignorance. their fantasies have quickly grown into facts in their own minds.

and now, across this wwweb, are smeared photos of my angels, complete with judgemental, shitty comments from complete strangers who can be so miserable with themselves, that they push their self-hatred on others.

i’m never going out with my children again without keeping one eye open for the razzi dementors who suck your soul with their photos.

one day… someone is going to start a tabloid about the razzi. and then we’ll turn the tables: we’ll report what razzi is cheating with whom… we’ll stalk them, scare them, chase them…. and one day… somehow… this grossly inappropriate way of life (like orwells’ 1984, but we are doing it to ourselves) will fade. and people will stop thinking that just cuz we are famous, we have answers. the only answers “we” have that “others” don’t is “how do you get famous?” knowing that answer doesn’t make me a better person.

So she’s pissed that people are talking about her and that the photographers are “stalking” her children. This doesn’t seem to happen to her much, and she does have two twin babies with a famous partner that people want to see.

Perez read the same post on Oh No They Didn’t where I found the news, and said that she should “move back to Kansas” or whatever.

It seems like the real issue is that she’s pissed that people are judging her and talking smack about her use of a sperm donor to have children with a female partner. Doesn’t she realize there are people with this opinion who are going to inevitably make dumb comments? She’s in a relationship with a more famous woman, hasn’t she learned to ignore those comments by now?

She also seems to have made a bad choice for a stroller instead of getting one with the neck support her babies need. I know I got a stroller for my son like that as a gift when he was born and the instructions said not to use it until he was a year old, so I waited. He probably wasn’t a full year old before we used it, but he could hold himself up better than her baby.

Pictures thanks to FlynetOnline.